Rearranged

by Carreiro, Tina

  “Is that what that was?” She poked him in the side. “You distracted me then…”

  “Slid into the prettiest thing I’ve ever been inside.” The tips of his fingers brushed the hair from her forehead, and his eyes searched hers, for what she didn’t know, but the expression on his face was a look of concern and confusion.

  “Explain to me why you don’t like slow?” She changed the subject. And by the looks of it, it wasn’t a good topic.

  “Slow is… more intimate.” He ran his fingers through his hair and dropped his gaze. “You connect deeper with slow. I think, anyway—opinions vary.”

  Well, hell. She couldn’t argue with him on that one. She had felt like they were one. And when she came, she felt free. Hearing him make noises of pleasure, which she’d brought him, tightened her chest. It scared the hell out of her. She wanted to hear him make those noises again, and often. It was going to take forever to get the sights and sounds from the night out of her head.

  “So, fast doesn’t work that way?”

  “Fast can. With the right person, I guess. Hard and fast is intense.” His eyes shifted to her thighs as she rubbed them together, and he arched a brow when her nipples tightened. “I’ve created a monster.”

  Wade cleared his throat. He mentally shook himself. What the hell was he doing? She’d crawled under his skin fast and undetected. He felt as if she’d ambushed him. Now, he was sitting here sharing his feelings and shit. He didn’t want her to leave, but he needed to create a space, and fast. He rose to his feet and looked around for his jeans. “When’s your dad comin’ back?”

  He caught her expression and watched the tension roll back into her spine when he reached down for his clothes. His head jerked toward his ring tone, and he walked to where Carly had left his phone. Saved…

  He smirked as he answered the phone, recalling the numerous times his brother had placed calls to get him out of a woman’s clutches. Although, it had been years since the Dawson brothers played the field together. Levi played solo now since Wade had stopped fishing in the pond. Nothing had ever been worth keeping anyway. He’d thrown them all back. They weren’t fun to catch either, most of the women just jumped right into his bed. Not that he’d done without sex. He just didn’t do it that often. He held the phone to his ear as he stepped into his jeans. “What’s up, little brother.”

  “Ah, hell…”

  “What?”

  “You got laid.”

  “What?”

  “I can hear it in your voice.”

  “Now… how in the hell can you hear that?”

  “Because we used to party every weekend until you went into your mournin’ phase. I just learned that in therapy.”

  “I need to get you out of that hippie shit.”

  “No… I’m learnin’ a lot. In fact, I don’t think you have hit your anger or crying phase yet. Of course those aren’t the technical terms, but I like’ em.”

  “What do you want?” He looked over his shoulder.

  His eyes moved over Carly’s frame as she slipped into her panties. His cock hardened, and he looked at the ceiling.

  “Serious as a heart attack, brother. It’s been ten years today, not one tear. Anyway… I was callin’ back to check on you.”

  “Callin’ back?”

  “Yeah... spoke to a Carly earlier, and she said she’d go check on you. She seemed very concerned.”

  “I’m good, Levi.”

  He heard his brother inhale. “You fucked Carly, didn’t ya?”

  The words were like a finger poking at his chest, and his conscience sneered at him. Yep. He’d fucked her, took her virginity, and now he was going to throw her out of his cabin. He couldn’t feel like a bigger ass if he tried.

  “Is that all you wanted?”

  “We need to talk about our little problemo.”

  “Later.”

  “She’s still there, isn’t she?” He snickered, and Wade rolled his eyes.

  “Bye, Levi.” He ended the call and twisted his torso. Carly had dressed, except for her shoes. When she saw him end the call, she grabbed them, and held them to her chest like a shield. “You don’t have to leave.”

  “I have work to do, and Daddy will be back.” She grabbed the glasses on the table, along with the two by the chair from earlier, and headed toward the sink. She seemed frazzled, so he followed.

  “Carly, is everything okay?” He hated to admit it, but if she had regret, it would kill him.

  “Yes. Fine.”

  Aw, shit… not the ‘fine’.

  She dropped the shoes and placed the glasses in the sink. Grabbing the soap, she squeezed some on a rag. She dumped the contents of the first glass, gasped, and quickly grabbed at the ice. Turning to face him, she held the ring he’d coveted all these years on her finger. Sliding it off at once, she held it between her two digits.

  “Almost lost this down the drain.”

  He grabbed it and stared at her. “Thanks.”

  “Did you love her?”

  “I thought I did.”

  “Then, why are you still holdin’ on to the past?” She tapped the diamond with her forefinger, and for the first time he noticed it’d lost its luster. “You know you can’t move forward if you got your boots cemented in the past.”

  “How’d you get so wise for someone so young?”

  “I’m not that young.”

  “You’re ten years younger than me.”

  “Too young for you, huh?” She pulled her shoulders back, and he watched Miss Scarlett materialize before his eyes. He didn’t know what to say, so he chose to say nothing. She smiled, but it didn’t reach her eyes as it did earlier. “I’m gonna go.”

  He reached for her shoes, and their heads almost collided. “I got this, cowboy. I’m a big girl, despite my age.” She sat at the kitchen table and slid into her boots.

  “Carly, I don’t want you leavin’ like this.”

  “Leavin’ like what?” She stood and faced him.

  “You suck at lyin’, you know that?” Her laugh was an obvious mask, and he scrunched his face. She’d switched gears on him faster than a slipping transmission. He really had no clue how to deal with this situation.

  “I’ve been livin’ a lie all my life, Wade. Got the whole town fooled that I’m somethin’ I’m not—like them.” The fire flashed in her eyes, and he stepped back. “I’d say I’m purdy good at it.”

  “You don’t have me fooled, and I’m askin’ you not to leave like this.”

  “I’ve got to go.” She turned on her heels and headed toward the exit. He caught her by the arm before she reached the door handle and spun her around. “Please don’t. You did what I asked, and I thank you. You were gentle and kind, but I know that’s all it was, all you can give me.”

  “What if it was more?”

  She swiped a tear falling down her cheek. “Now who sucks at lyin’?”

  “I’d never lie to you.”

  “Really.” She steadied herself and looked straight into his eyes. “How much more was it to you? Do you want me to marry Chet?”

  Shit! He couldn’t say it. If he said he didn’t want her to marry him, it would be just as if he stopped the wedding, and he wasn’t sure what her next step would be. That would jeopardize his brother’s freedom and the business. No, he didn’t want her marrying that ass-clown, but it had to be by her choice, not one that he influenced. He needed to think. Closing his eyes, he pinched the bridge of his nose.

  “Wade, don’t look so stressed… back to our commitments… remember?” She was out the door before he could stop her, and he stood there, staring after her. She had him twisted like a pretzel, and he didn’t know which end was up.

  He opened the door to follow her, and stepped back in, leaving it cracked as he peered out. How long had her daddy been home?

  Chapter 14

  Crooked as fishhooks

  Carly went straight to the stable. She grabbed a brush and opened Lightning’s stall. As silly as it mig
ht seem, he was the only one that understood her. She relaxed as she made the first long stroke down his coat. The two of them had been together since he was born. She had been a little girl, but she could still remember Lightning’s birth. An hour after he came into the world, he stood and came toward her on wobbly legs. He poked his little face through the wooden slats to smell her. It was love at first sight. Just like…

  Her eyes widened. The brush stilled in her hand. Oh my god. Is that why she felt more empty and lost than usual? Did she love Wade? No. No. Can’t be. It’s too fast. Oh, God help me. She leaned her head on Lightning. The way Wade had touched her—made love to her—stared at her with such heat it made her skin burn everywhere he’d touched. Then he’d looked stressed, confused, and almost as if he’d hyperventilate if he didn’t find a way to get her out of his hair. She’d been bewildered when he’d asked her to stay, but when she’d asked him about marrying Chet he’d said nothing. His actions didn’t make sense, and she didn’t need this extra weight on her shoulders. She rolled her head to the side and saw the light shining from underneath the office door.

  Her daddy must be back. She tossed the brush in the bin before she entered the office only to find it empty. As usual, he’d left the light on. Her eyes fixed on an overdue letter, this one in green letters, attached to a manila envelope. She looked inside its torn edges. “Now the taxes are overdue?” Feeling sick, she sat back in the chair.

  Her fingers paused over the clasp of the larger envelope. After a deep breath, she opened it. Pulling out a photo, she recognized Amy Sue right away, but the man only looked familiar. She tilted her head. Her brain was chewing on something. She knew that face.

  “Holy shit!” She stood, gaping at the picture. Whatever was going on around here, she planned to find out right damn now.

  She flung open the door to her house. “Daddy!” Her veins felt infused with fire, and they heated more when she locked with her father’s gaze. “Now the taxes, Daddy?” She charged toward him holding out the evidence. “How much do you owe? And, why do you have a picture of Wade’s brother with Amy Sue?”

  “Why are you out of your room?” He reached for the folder, and she snatched it back. He pointed to the folder, “That’s not your business.”

  “I think it is!”

  “You better learn your place. This isn’t your business.”

  “Unless I was a man, right, Daddy. Women belong in the house doing dishes, and men run everything!” A boldness she’d never felt before came over her.

  “Don’t you raise your voice at me, young lady.”

  “Say it! Say it!” The anger bubbled out of her. “You wish that I was a boy… Say it!”

  “Yes! I wanted a son, and I got you!”

  As if he had physically pushed her, she fell back against the wall. Her hand cupped her mouth, she had thought he felt this way all these years, but he’d never said it aloud. “Did you love my mother?”

  “Why would you ask such a thing?”

  “Because you don’t love me, so I was wonderin’ if you loved my mother. Is that why she killed herself?”

  His expression fell with exaggerated distress. He looked tired and old. “No, we won’t talk about this.”

  “You can’t keep sweepin’ it under the carpet like a dirty little secret, Daddy.” She watched the denial flash in his eyes as he placed his hands on his hips and shook his head. “I’m leaving.”

  “You can’t leave.” He grabbed her arm, and she glared at his touch. “I’ll lose everything.” She locked onto his gaze, staring him down. “She killed herself because… I was an asshole, and she couldn’t give me a son.” He released her, slumping down in the chair. He placed his hands over his face. “We lost a baby boy before you, Carly. Then two more after. I begged her for one more try…”

  “That was John?”

  “Yes… she lost him at six months. And then—”

  “I found her on the floor in the bathroom… Did you ask her to try again?” She had never told him her mother’s final words, that she had felt trapped.

  “No. The doctor said her hormones were out of control. She was depressed, and he wouldn’t suggest it.” He turned his head; eyes glossed over with pain looked up at her. “And then she left me. I… I don’t know how to raise a girl. That’s why I turned to the church.”

  “You sure went out a lot for someone who had a depressed wife at home.”

  “She left us…”

  “Why do you have a picture of Levi Dawson and Amy Sue?” She watched him with more suspicion than a daughter should have to.

  “It’s kind of a portfolio.” He took the envelope from her hand.

  What did that mean? “What exactly did you hire Wade to do, Daddy?”

  “Something going on between the two of you?”

  She swallowed and shook her head with a slow deception. “No, Daddy.” She’d lied to him before, but this time, she wasn’t sure he believed her. He watched her carefully and his expression change as if he came to a decision about something.

  “The Dawsons own a bounty hunting business. They can track down anyone. He was hired to make sure you stay put, and make it down the aisle—using any means necessary.”

  She noted the change in his eyes but couldn’t judge if he was telling her the truth. Nonetheless, the implication in his look turned her stomach. His shit-eating grin made her skin crawl as if he knew Wade had touched her and with his permission of ‘any means’. She felt her knees wobble, but she held her spine straight. She tried to move her mind past, using any means necessary. “And if I don’t marry, Chet?”

  “His daddy owns the mortgage. He’ll take the farm, your mama’s grave, and Lightnin’.”

  “How much do you owe, Daddy?”

  “That’s a man’s business, no place for a woman in it.”

  “Well this woman… is goin’ to be bailin’ your ass out.” She snatched the envelope out of his hand. Slamming the door behind her, she walked as if hell was on her heels toward the stable. She needed to get on Lightning and ride this anger out. How could she lose her horse, her mother’s grave? She felt her chest tighten right before she ran into a wall named Wade. She bounced off his muscular chest, and his hands grabbed her elbows, righting her balance.

  Carly jerked out of his grasp and glared at him. “What are you supposed to be doing here, Wade Dawson?”

  “What do you mean by here? Here in the stable? Here on earth?”

  “You are such a fuckin’ liar.”

  “Whoa!” He held his hands up. “What the hell did I do?”

  “What did Daddy hire you to do?”

  He placed his hands on his hips and looked away before he stepped closer to her. His head tilted down, and he met her accusing gaze. “To oversee the ranch and look after you. He wanted to make sure you made it to the altar.”

  “Using any means necessary.”

  “What?”

  “Never mind.” She took one of the duplicate photos from the envelope and slammed it against his chest, than stepped to the side, walking past him. “Maybe you and your brother can get a T.V. show called the Virgin Hunters.”

  * * * *

  Carly slammed the office door, and locked it behind her. She felt dirty, stupid, deceived, and more alone than ever before. She loved her daddy, and had only ever asked for love in return. He judged her by gender and probably didn’t love her at all. Somehow, that didn’t matter or come close to hurting as much as the deceit she felt from Wade. She gave herself to a man just doing his job. That’s why he didn’t say anything about her marrying Chet and why he acted so strange once they’d finished making love. It was sex. She’d have to get that through her head. But why did he look at her as if he wanted much more? Why touch her as he did if he was just letting her go? Dammit. She had nothing to compare it too.

  She grabbed the phone from the cradle and stared at Levi Dawson’s picture as she pressed the numbers. “Amy Sue.” She noted the nervous edge to her voice when she said her name. �
�Yes. It’s been awhile.”

  “My daddy isn’t here.”

  “I’m not lookin’ for the sheriff, Amy Sue, not yet.” She twirled the phone cord around her finger. “Tell me about this photo of you and the bounty hunter.” She heard Amy’s sharp inhale.

  “How do you have it?”

  “You’re in trouble, Amy Sue.” She bluffed.

  “I didn’t mean to hurt anyone. I just slipped something in his beer and took pictures. My daddy doesn’t know the bounty hunter was here, and I lied about being his secretary.”

  “Why was he here?”

  “I didn’t mean to hurt anyone! Chet asked me… I was tryin’ to help. Blackmail works in the movies.”

  “That’s what this sounds like… a fuckin’ soap opera. Who does this to people? How could you do that, Amy Sue?”

  “I love him.”

  “Who?”

  “I can’t tell you.” Amy sobbed, and Carly rolled her eyes at the drama.

  “You need to come clean about this.”

  Amy gasped. “No. I can’t. He’ll be mad.”

  “Who? Chet?”

  “Yes.”

  “So? He’ll get over it.”

  “No, Carly. You can’t say anything to anyone. You don’t know him like I do.”

  “And just how well do you know him, Amy Sue?”

  “I have to go. You can’t say anything. If you do… I’ll… my daddy will have that bounty hunter arrested for statutory rape—in the state of Georgia. Get the picture?”

  Carly pulled the phone away from her ear when a loud bang pushed down into her eardrum. She stared at the receiver. “She did not just hang up on me!” Damn. She didn’t even get to ask Amy why, and what, Chet asked her to do, exactly. The questions were piling up, and she was emotionally exhausted. She just wanted to live in a place where everyone in her life wasn’t as crooked as a fishhook. She moaned in frustration. She had to look at wedding cakes tomorrow, and Chet was coming over. It was going to be a long sleepless night.

  Chapter 15

  Anger Issues