Love in the Moment: The McCormicks—Book One
Page 16
Well, maybe not everything.
The memory of Ian holding her in his arms crashed through her. The way he looked at her. The way she felt when he looked at her that way.
“I don’t know,” she finally said.
Deanna took a deep breath and smiled. “Then you don’t make a decision yet. Wait until you know. And you should do one other thing.”
“What’s that?”
“Talk to Ian.”
Right. Talk to Ian. But what would she say?
*
“Ready?”
Chelsea looked at him as if he were crazy. “Are you?”
Ian had convinced Sam to give Chelsea the night off because it wasn’t very busy anyway. He’d also promised that they’d come in and have a beer later. It was a promise he was hoping to keep. Assuming the introductions went well. He’d been pacing for the last hour, waiting for the door to open. Mitch should be there any second and as excited as Ian was to see his brother, he really had no idea how Mitch would react to Chelsea’s presence.
As the two oldest brothers, they’d responded much differently to their father’s infidelity than Declan and Cal. From day one, they’d both refused to acknowledge Chelsea and Amber’s existence, as if it was their fault that their family was destroyed. Declan and Cal were closer in age to the girls, and had ended up in the same high school. The four of them grew close and it had only been Mitch and Ian on the outside of that foursome. There was a good chance that Mitch would feel betrayed.
A very good chance.
“Sit down, Ian.” Chelsea laughed at him and handed him a beer. “Seriously. You’re making me nervous.”
“And you’re not?”
She shrugged. “Should I be?”
That was a great question. Should she be? If it was him, he would be nervous. After all, he had firsthand knowledge of all the terrible things he and Mitch had said about his half-sisters. The awful things they used to say about her mother, the hate they perpetuated in each other. All because they didn’t understand. And they were loyal to a fault.
But that was a long time ago. He’d gotten over it. Mitch might have as well.
“I’m not sure,” he answered her honestly. “It was hardest for Mitch and me.” He cracked the top of his beer. “We were older than the others when we found out and we kind of blamed you and Amber.”
“For the affair?” She looked confused. “We were as innocent as you guys were. We talked about this, Ian. I certainly didn’t choose to be the product of an affair. Do you think I would have chosen that if I could?”
He’d honestly never stopped to think about it from her point of view. It took him a moment, but he shook his head. “No. I don’t think you would have.”
She walked across the room and grabbed the beer from his hand, taking a healthy swallow before she responded. “Damn straight I wouldn’t have.” She handed him the can and laughed. “But here we are. And soon enough we’ll be one happy family. Stop worrying.”
Ian stared at her in wonder. Was she seriously the same girl who’d come to town less than a month ago, surly, withdrawn, and emotional?
“What?” She caught him staring at her.
He shook his head with a chuckle. “I just can’t believe it.”
“Believe what?”
“Nothing. Never mind. Have a beer with me.”
“I just did.” She laughed, but it was cut short by a knock on the door. “He’s here.”
She may have told him she wasn’t nervous, but her face betrayed her. “It’s all good, Chels.” Ian hopped up. “I’ll let him in.”
The door opened before Ian could get to it, revealing his little brother, who stood a few inches taller than he did, bearing two large duffel bags. “It feels good to be back!” Mitch dropped his bags and wrapped his arms around Ian.
It was good to see Mitch again. Really good. It’d only been a few months, but something about being back at the lake and in the old house had made Ian nostalgic for his brothers. He hadn’t even spoken to Cal, but that wasn’t unusual since he was always gallivanting around the world, living the life of the rich and famous. He absorbed his brother’s hug and made a mental note to give Cal a call and invite him home, too.
“It’s good to see you, too.” Ian thumped Mitch on the back. “What’s this?” He grabbed at the scruff of a beard on his brother’s chin. “Getting into the spirit of the mountains, are you?”
“Why not? School’s out and Mr. McCormick is off for the summer. Time to let loose a little.”
“Well. A beard is a good way to do it.” Ian shook his head and laughed at his little brother. With his thick, dark hair and dark eyes, Mitch always had been a bit rougher around the edges than he was. But it was definitely a side of himself he had to keep under wraps as a teacher at a prominent private school.
Ian took a deep breath in. He might as well get the introductions out of the way. “So, there’s something I didn’t tell you on the phone.”
Instantly, Mitch’s eyes narrowed in suspicion. “Ian, do not tell me—”
“I’m not going to tell you anything.” Ian cut him off smoothly. “But there is someone I want you to meet.” He stepped to the side, exposing Chelsea, who’d been standing, silently waiting. “Mitch, this is Chelsea.”
Mitch’s face underwent an array of emotions in about twenty seconds flat. But to Ian’s surprise, it finally landed on a small smile. He reached up and rubbed the scruff on his chin, contemplating for a few moments before he spoke. “Chelsea.”
She stepped forward and held out her hand. If she was nervous, she didn’t look it, and Ian was ridiculously proud of his little sister. Mitch could be an imposing figure. “Hi. It’s nice to—”
“Come here.” Mitch took two steps forward and pulled her into a hug.
Ian couldn’t have been more shocked if Mitch had shown up wearing a tutu. He waited awkwardly for the hug to finish, unsure of how he was supposed to react. Finally, they each stepped back, smiles on their faces. Tears in Chelsea’s eyes.
“Well, I’m not going to lie, this is a strange little reunion,” Ian said. “Don’t get me wrong. I’m glad it’s…well…”
“Stop trying to analyze it, big brother.” Mitch looked at Chelsea and added, “He always does that.”
He couldn’t argue with that, so he didn’t bother. Instead, Ian laughed and threw up his arms. “I think this calls for a celebration. I don’t have any champagne, but I do have beers.”
“Sounds perfect.”
*
“You were pretty worried, huh?”
Chelsea had gone to bed hours ago, but the brothers were still sitting around, reminiscing and catching up over beers. They’d covered a lot of subjects, and Ian was starting to wonder when they were going to get around to the topic of their little sister.
“I was.” Ian took another slug of his beer. “Can you blame me?”
Mitch answered with a chuckle and a shake of his head. “Not really. But she’s a nice girl.”
“She really is.”
“And that all happened a long time ago.”
“It did,” Ian agreed. “But I guess I thought you’d still be mad.”
“At Dad?”
Ian nodded.
“I am,” Mitch confirmed. “But I’m not mad at the girls. It wasn’t their fault. In truth, I’ve always felt a little bad for the way we reacted.”
“We were kids.”
“True. But we didn’t have to be dicks. Cal and Declan weren’t.”
Ian nodded. “No, they weren’t. But that’s in the past.”
“Exactly.” Mitch held out his beer bottle for a clink and they both drank. “Now tell me, what’s going on around here? Besides the marina, of course.”
“Not much,” he lied.
His brother knew him well, and he saw right through it. “Bullshit. What’s her name?”
Ian laughed. “What makes you think there’s a woman?”
“Really, Ian? I know you. And I also know you lik
e women. Don’t tell me…is it that girl you saw the year before…well, you know. What was her name? Deanna. Right. Deanna. Is it her?”
“No.” Ian shook his head. Besides a brief flirtation when he’d come back to town, a flirtation that was totally one-sided, considering she was happy with her boyfriend Marcus, they’d managed to totally forget about that one night the summer before his life had imploded. They’d hooked up one night but that was the extent of it. And it was an entire lifetime ago. The fact that she was Gwen’s friend was only a minor detail. And not one that seemed to bother anyone. “It’s not Deanna.”
“But you admit there’s someone?”
Ian laughed and tipped his head back. The stars lit up the sky in an impressive display of constellations and patterns spattered across the sky.
“There is someone.” He sat up. “Her name is Gwen and she’s amazing. You have to meet her. You know what?” An idea came to him suddenly. “We should have a party. Kind of a grand opening and a welcome back to Cedar Springs.”
“I like parties.” Mitch nodded and reached for another beer. “When?”
“Right away. Tomorrow night.”
Chapter Fifteen
The last thing Gwen was in the mood for was a party. She’d spent the last twenty-four hours thinking about what she would say to Ian. What she would tell him and how she was going to get out of the mess she was in on her blog and not entirely destroy what she’d been building. She hadn’t eaten, barely slept, and even the run she’d taken earlier hadn’t helped. She literally had no idea what she was going to do. And then Ian texted her telling her he was throwing a party.
A party.
She sighed and looked in her closet for something that would be appropriate. Gwen usually loved nothing more than an excuse for getting dressed up and putting on a pretty dress, but her heart was definitely not in it. She needed to snap out of it.
Leaving her closet, she crawled back into bed and pulled her laptop toward her. She still hadn’t hit Post on her last blog post. The one that basically would be a complete and total betrayal to Ian. Every time she looked at it, her stomach turned. Which should tell her everything she needed to know about that post. She couldn’t publish it.
But she needed to publish something.
She needed to write a new post. A real one.
Gwen clicked over to her blog, pulled up a blank page and started writing.
*
Dear Reader,
I haven’t been honest.
Not with Mr. Summer.
Not with you.
And not with myself.
It’s time I changed that.
The truth is…when I first laid eyes on Mr. Summer after so much time had passed, I wasn’t prepared.
I wasn’t prepared for how I’d react.
For how he didn’t recognize me.
And…most importantly, I wasn’t prepared for the reaction I had.
It surprised me how much I could still care for a man who’d hurt me so much, so long ago.
I was thrown off, and that’s why I reacted the way I did. That’s why I decided to carry out the deception I did and play a game that I never should have started.
Because that’s the truth. I never should have pretended to be someone I’m not, and that’s exactly what I did when I didn’t tell Mr. Summer who I was from the very beginning.
It was wrong.
I was wrong.
It’s never okay to play with someone’s feelings or to deceive them. Especially for entertainment or for your own benefit.
I feel terrible.
My behavior for the last few weeks has not been an accurate representation of who I am or the person I want to be.
Which is why, no matter how hard it is, I’ll be telling Mr. Summer the truth. Tonight.
And hopefully, with any luck, he’ll forgive me and still believe me when I tell him that I love him.
*
Satisfied, Gwen sat back. As soon as she typed the last word, a weight was lifted from her shoulders. She felt lighter. Free.
With a smile, she lay back on the bed and stretched her arms over her head. It felt good to be honest. Even if it meant the end of things with Ian. It was what she had to do. It was time. No. It was way past time.
The knot that had been in her stomach for the last few days returned and tightened. She wasn’t totally out of the woods with Ian. Not even close. Coming clean with her readers was one thing. But as soon as she posted that blog entry, she would get dressed, do her hair and makeup and go in search of Ian to tell him the truth. That would be the hard part.
Especially because she did love him. A lot. And there was a very real chance that after tonight, he wouldn’t want anything to do with her ever again.
But she couldn’t think about that now. Not yet anyway. First things first. She sat up again and looked at her computer. All she had to do was hit Post. Her finger hovered over the button, but she couldn’t do it.
“Maybe I should change that header I’ve been meaning to update?” It was a small website maintenance task she’d been putting off forever. But it would only take a minute and then she could submit the new entry and everything would be ready at once.
Gwen quickly clicked out of what she was doing and into her graphics program. It only took a few minutes before she was ready to copy and paste it into position. It didn’t take long and it was done. Time to finish up and get ready for the party.
With a sigh, she navigated back to the page with the drafts of posts she’d prepared or hadn’t finished with yet. She selected the piece she’d just composed, squeezed her eyes shut and pressed Post.
“There.”
It was done. There was nothing left to do but pick out her prettiest dress and go find the man she loved.
*
“It’s a great party, Ian.” Marcus Stone slapped him on the back and handed him a drink. “If there’s something this town loves, it’s a week full of parties. This is the perfect warm-up to the festival on Monday. And congratulations on everything. The marina and…well…”
Ian was grateful that they’d long since had the opportunity to make amends with each other from the night they’d first met at Slade and Beth’s wedding when Ian had been dancing with Deanna. Ian had no way to know that the two of them were having a fight and he’d inadvertently gotten in the middle of it. The fact that they had a history from when they were kids had only made things worse.
But that was all in the past now, and the two men were quickly becoming friends, which was definitely a good thing because Gwen and Deanna were tight. Ian could envision barbecues and maybe even vacations as couples. But he was getting ahead of himself.
He accepted the drink with a smile. “Thanks, man. It hasn’t been entirely easy, but you know what it’s like when you open a business.”
Marcus nodded and then shook his head with a laugh. “I can’t actually say that I do know. But I can imagine. Hey, where’s that beautiful girlfriend of yours? When I picked Deanna up, she said Gwen would meet us here.”
It was a good question. One he’d like an answer to as well. He’d been scanning the docks continuously, but there was still no sign of her. The party was being held both on the docks—which Chelsea had decorated with twinkle lights—and in the shop itself, as well as the lawn next to it. The space wasn’t entirely conventional, but it just felt right to celebrate at the Dockside instead of in the pub. Although, Ian was pretty sure they’d all end up at the Grizzly Paw later on. “I haven’t seen her yet,” he answered. “But I’m sure she’s here somewhere.”
Just as he finished answering, he caught sight of Mitch and waved him over. “Marcus, I’d like you to meet my brother Mitch. He’s a teacher in the city, but I’ve managed to get him out here for the summer to help me out.”
“He bribed me with promises of boats and beer.” Mitch extended his hand. “It’s nice to meet you, Marcus.”
The men chatted for a few minutes before Marcus excused himself to go find Deann
a, leaving the brothers alone for a moment.
“So, are you having a good time?” Mitch asked. “Where’s this woman of yours? I’m dying to see who it is who managed to capture your attention to the point where you don’t even want to look at—”
“Don’t finish that sentence, brother. I’m not even tempted.” Things were so different now that he had Gwen. “I’m sure she’s here somewhere.” He glanced around again, and his heart actually physically skipped a beat when he saw her by the picnic table on the lawn. It was ridiculous and cliché, but Ian couldn’t think of a better way to react to seeing Gwen. “There she is.”
Mitch twisted around and scanned the area Ian was pointing to.
“She’s right there,” Ian said. “By the picnic table in the…that’s the same dress she wore to our first date.” He smiled to himself. She’d looked ridiculously gorgeous in it that night, too. Although, if he remembered correctly, and he was pretty sure that he did, she’d looked even better out of it.
“What dress?” Mitch asked. “There’s like four women over there.”
“The black one with the red top. She’s just—”
“No way.”
“What?”
Mitch laughed and spilled his drink. “The black and red dress?”
Ian eyed his brother cautiously. “Yes.” He said the word slowly, drawing out the one-syllable word.
“She looks really familiar.”
“Maybe you know her from the city,” Ian said. “Don’t tell me you dated her.” The last thing Ian needed was to find out that his playboy brother had dated Gwen.
“Oh, I definitely didn’t date her.” Mitch squinted and twisted his head to get a better look. “I’m not totally sure, but…that’s crazy. It is her.” He laughed again.
“What’s so funny? And why are you staring at her like that?”
“You didn’t tell me I knew her.”
Something deep inside Ian twisted and the burger he’d eaten for dinner suddenly didn’t feel very settled. “You don’t.”