His door is closed but I can hear him talking to someone.
“I told you to hire Donovan.” My dad sounds pissed.
“I tried, but he was doing another job,” some other guy says. I don’t recognize the voice.
“Then you wait!” My dad slams his fist on something, probably the desk. “You wait for him to be available! You don’t just go and hire someone else! And you sure as hell don’t do it without talking to me first.”
“I’m sorry. I’ll call our people right now.”
“They’ve already been called. It’s cleaned up. And don’t you EVER make me do that again. I clean up my own messes. Nobody else’s. Do you understand?”
“Yes. Of course.” There’s silence and then the guys says, “So what do we do about Jacobson? He knows. He saw everything.”
“I already called Donovan. He’ll take care of it tomorrow.”
“But Pearce, we can’t—”
My dad slams his fist again. “Do you think we have a choice in this? This is what happens when you’re careless! Innocent people get hurt.”
“Maybe we could just tell them he didn’t see it or—”
“Staying for dinner, Garret?” Katherine asks.
She snuck up behind me in the foyer. Scared the shit out of me.
“No. I’m leaving.” I walk out the door and to my car. I speed off, feeling anxious.
Why was I listening to that conversation just now? I know my dad is involved in some really bad shit, but I try to pretend he isn’t. I try to pretend he’s just the owner and CEO of a company and that’s it. Nothing more. But then I overhear stuff like that and I’m reminded that he’s part of something bad. Something really fucking bad.
He does things that are wrong and illegal. He hurts people, or he at least hires people to do it. I don’t think he wants to. I think someone makes him do it. Some group he belongs to. I don’t know much about it but they’ve had meetings at my house.
I know this group does bad things and I know they make my dad do bad things. I know he’s had people killed. I’m sure that’s what he was talking about just now. He had someone killed and then had someone else clean it up. His clean-up crew. I’ve even heard him call them that.
I grew up overhearing this shit. And when I was younger, I asked my dad about it but he wouldn’t tell me anything. Instead he yelled at me for asking questions, then he sat me down and gave me the rules.
Rule number one? Never ask questions. It’s the most important rule.
One night when I was 14, I made the mistake of asking a question and my dad got so mad I actually thought he might hurt me. It was 2 in the morning and I’d gone downstairs to play video games in the game room because I couldn’t sleep.
My dad came in the front door just as I was coming down the stairs. There was a light on in the foyer and I could see that my dad’s white dress shirt was spattered with blood. His suit jacket was off and he held it in one hand, his phone in the other. He was yelling at someone on the phone but he hung up when he saw me.
I ran down the stairs and asked him what happened. When I saw the blood, I thought he might be hurt. He dropped his phone and his jacket and shook my shoulders, telling me to never speak of this again. To never tell anyone anything about that night. Not Katherine. Not my grandfather. No one.
My dad’s eyes were so cold and his tone was so threatening that it didn’t even look or sound like him. I was scared of him. I was scared of my own father.
I think he killed someone that night. And I think he did it himself.
Since then, I’ve never forgotten the rules. And I never will.
I notice I’m driving 50 in a 30 mph zone so I ease up on the gas. I take a deep breath, clearing my head of whatever it was I heard my dad talking about. I’ve learned to do that. I’ve learned to shut out whatever bad shit’s going on around me and pretend it’s not happening. That’s the only way to survive in my family. Just look the other way. Smile and act happy. Or drink. Drink until you pass out so you don’t have to think about it anymore.
CHAPTER EIGHT
When I get to campus, I stop by Jade’s room but she’s not there. It’s now almost 6 and Jade and I are swimming at 7. I hope she isn’t bailing on me. She’s very competitive, which I love, but that also might mean she’ll try to cancel our swim date because she knows she won’t win.
I get to my room and realize I left my phone in the car. I go back out to get it and spot Jade lying on a blanket under a tree. It looks like she’s asleep. She must’ve been reading because she has a book next to her, along with potato chips and a bottle of soda.
I drop down beside her on the blanket and nudge her side. “Jade. Wake up.” She opens her eyes, squinting from the sun. “How long have you been out here?”
“I don’t know. What time is it?”
“Six. We have a swim date in an hour. You should stretch a little before we go.”
“Nah, I don’t need to stretch. I’m ready.” She sits up and looks around, like she’s checking that her stuff’s still there. She has major trust issues. Did she really think people would steal her book? Or her potato chips?
“You should at least eat something. What did you do for lunch?”
She picks up the empty bag of potato chips and a bottle of soda. “Lunch.”
I knew she’d go all day without a meal. I should’ve been here so I could’ve taken her to eat. But I wasn’t here because of Katherine. Man, I hate that woman.
“That’s it? Let’s go get something quick.”
“I don’t need anything. Besides, they say not to swim right after you eat.”
I stand up and extend my hand to her. “That’s a myth. Come on, my car’s right over there.”
“No, I’ll get something later.” She takes my hand and I pull her up. “Why do we have to wait until 7? Can’t we just do this now and get it over with?”
“I guess we could.” She drinks the last of her soda and I wait for her to finish, then say, “You know, maybe you could act a little more excited. After all, you get to see me practically naked.”
She stares at me. “Did you seriously just say that?”
I’m trying really hard not to laugh.
She shakes her head. “Well, someone’s full of himself. Now I’ll make sure I look the other way. Like I really want to see that.”
I just grin. I know she wants to see that. I keep catching her checking me out.
She picks up her book and takes her garbage to the trash while I shake out the blanket and fold it up.
I follow her to her room. The place looks empty. She’s got nothing but the bed, the dresser, and the desk that comes standard in every room. There’s no TV. No speakers. Nothing on the walls. No extra chairs or tables.
“You don’t have much stuff,” I say.
“I don’t need much stuff. I think most people have too many things. It just ends up being clutter.”
“My parents have a TV you could have. It’s just sitting in storage if you want it.”
“I don’t need one.” She walks to the door. “Okay, let’s get this over with.”
Damn, she’s hilarious. Her ornery attitude does not at all fit her cute little face. It just comes off as being funny, so I laugh. “You could at least pretend this’ll be fun.” We go in the hall and I wait as she locks her door. “Don’t you want to bring anything?”
“Like what?”
“Change of clothes, shampoo. I don’t know.”
“You’re not bringing anything.”
“All my stuff is already over there in my locker.”
“We’re coming back here after we swim, right? I’ll just change clothes when I get back.”
Most girls I know would load up a giant designer bag with hair supplies and makeup. But not Jade. Then again, most girls wouldn’t go swimming with me. Actually, this is the first time I’ve had a girl swim with me.
We walk down the hill, past the track and the fitness center to the building with the pool. We sp
lit off and go to the locker rooms to change.
I get to the pool before her and start doing some laps. The water feels good. It soothes me. Makes me forget about my problems. It’s just what I need after overhearing that conversation with my dad and that guy.
A few minutes later, Jade walks in, a towel wrapped around her. I stand up and wipe the water from my eyes.
“Get in,” I tell her. “It’s cold at first, but you’ll be okay once you start moving.”
She slowly takes her towel off. She’s wearing one of the black, one-piece suits they keep in the girls’ locker room. I always thought those things were ugly but Jade makes it look good. I think she could make anything look good. She’s thin but she still has curves. A perfect hourglass. And she has large breasts for someone her size. Definitely a handful.
She sits down on the edge of the pool and dangles her feet in the water.
I swim over to her. “You gotta get in all at once. It’s easier that way.”
“Maybe this was a bad idea. I don’t really like swimming.”
“And I don’t like running. But I did it.”
I reach my hands around her narrow waist, pick her up, and slowly lower her into the pool.
“How’s that?” I let her go as she grabs the edge of the pool, supporting herself.
“Still cold.” I notice her feet moving back and forth in the water as she struggles to stay afloat.
I get my hands wet and run them over her shoulders, leaving the cool water behind. “You just need to get used to it. Now go all the way under.”
“I’m not ready yet.”
“Afraid to get your hair wet?” I know that’ll piss her off just enough to make her dunk her head in the water.
She does exactly that, then bursts up to the surface.
“That’s better,” I say. “Do you want to do a few laps before we race?”
“Sure.” She positions herself in the lane next to me, kicks off the wall, and does the basic breaststroke. Actually it’s more like an awkward combination of the breaststroke and butterfly. And she’s so slow. Painfully slow. I could probably do six laps in the time it took her to do one. I didn’t know she was such a bad swimmer. She acted like she could really swim.
“Okay, I’m ready,” she says after her practice lap.
“We don’t need to race. We can just swim.”
“Why wouldn’t we race? I went to all the trouble to get here. You’re racing me. Now get in position.”
“All right, but just out and back one time, okay? Ready. Set. Go.” I wait, giving her a head start.
But then I see she’s going really fast. She tricked me. Shit. I take off, trying to catch up, but she gets to the end of the pool before me and swims back. I turn and kick off the wall and almost catch up, but she beats me.
“Nice play,” I tell her.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” She’s really out of breath. That was probably the fastest she’s ever swam. And she did it just to beat me. I love it. That competitive side of her is so freaking hot.
“So now that I know you can really swim, how about we try this again? Only this time I don’t give you a head start and we repeat that loop three more times. A runner like you has good endurance, right? So a few extra laps should be no problem.”
“Nope. No problem at all.” She smiles and gets in position next to me.
I count off, then swim fast, like I would in a meet. Jade tries to keep up and she’s actually not bad. She’s really fast for someone who doesn’t swim very often. But I still beat her by an entire lap.
“That was good, Jade. Really good.” I stand up and wipe the water from my face.
“I was way behind. That wasn’t good.”
“I’ve been swimming my whole life. I’ve been trained by Olympic coaches. So for you to be that close behind is really good. You did way better with swimming than I did with running.”
“You want to go again?”
I laugh. “Damn you’re competitive. You’d stay here all night trying to beat me, wouldn’t you?”
“Probably.” She hangs onto the edge of the pool, moving up and down in the water. “Okay, yeah, I would. So you want to go again or what?”
She’s got me so turned on with her body in that suit, and racing me like that, and her need to beat me at my own sport. I can’t hold back anymore. I have to kiss her. If she says no, she says no, but I have to at least try.
I wrap my arm around her waist, keeping my eyes on hers. “I like that about you, Jade. That whole competitive edge thing.”
Jade lets go of the pool, forcing me to hold on to her. That’s a good sign. A very good sign. If she’s letting me hold her like this, I’m pretty sure she’ll be okay with the kiss.
I put my other arm around her lower back, pressing her into me. And damn, she feels good. Her legs were kicking, treading water, but as soon as I held her, she let them relax against me.
She’s breathing fast and it’s not from the swimming. I love that I’m getting to her like this.
“What else do you like about me?” She asks it flirtatiously, which I wasn’t expecting.
I lock my eyes on her and say exactly what I’m thinking. “I like that you give me shit. Because nobody gives me shit. Ever.” I pause. “I like that you ignore me, making me work my ass off to chase you down. I like that you don’t care what people think, including me.” I put my lips right up to her ear and say in almost a whisper, “I like that you’re incredibly hot and don’t know it. And that you’re completely turning me on in a way I didn’t think was possible.”
“Anything else?” She’s so breathless she can hardly ask it.
I look at her again, directly in her eyes. “I like that I have no idea what you’re gonna do after I do this.”
I lean in and kiss her, just gently, then wait for her response. She kisses me back. Exactly what I was hoping for. She reaches up and puts her arms around my neck and her legs around my waist. That was more than I was hoping for. I smile and tighten my arms around her lower back, pulling her even closer. She feels so damn good I could hold her like this all day.
I slide my hand up her back, slipping it under her hair. I place it at the back of her neck and bring her to my mouth, kissing her gently, like before. She parts her lips, welcoming me, and I glide my tongue over hers, tasting her.
I take the kiss deeper, my tongue exploring her mouth. She’s still holding on to me, her breasts against my chest, our lower bodies pressed together. My swim trunks are tight so they’re kind of keeping things under control down there but not really. I’m so turned on and I know she can feel it, but she’s not pulling away. Instead, she tightens her grip like she wants to get even closer.
She shivers from the cool air, so I break from the kiss and lower her into the water. Then I wet my face and run my lips along her neck, noticing the tiny bumps that rise up on her skin.
She likes the water. I could tell when I kissed her with my wet lips. Knowing she likes the water turns me on even more. I wet my face again and kiss her, then I lick the water from her lips and slip my tongue in her mouth and give her more deep kisses, going slow, taking my time.
After a while, Jade’s legs loosen around me and I feel her sinking into the water. I slide my hands under her thighs and lift her up. She arches back, and I kiss the area just below her collarbone, then kiss my way down her chest and along the top of her breasts which are peeking out from her suit.
She tightens her legs around me and I move my hand behind her neck again, guiding her back to my lips. I position my other hand under her ass, my fingers grazing over the thin fabric between her legs.
Just as I’m about to slip my finger under the fabric, Jade breaks from our kiss and shoves me away. She starts kicking me and screaming.
I let go of her. “Jade? What is it? What did I do?”
She swims to the edge of the pool. “I have to go.” She’s shaking and shivering and struggling to get out of the pool. She finally does and
starts heading for the locker room.
“Wait! I don’t understand.” I jump out of the pool and follow her. “Jade, wait!” I catch her hand and hold it. “I’m sorry. I thought you were telling me it was okay. I guess I misread the whole thing.”
She turns away so I can’t see her face. She’s quiet, but I hear her shaky breaths. I think she might be crying. Dammit! What did I do to make her cry? Did she not want to be touched? Is it too soon?
I’m still holding her hand and I gently rub it with my thumb. “Jade, you should’ve said something. I would’ve stopped. I won’t do it again, okay?”
She rips her hand from mine and runs into the girls’ locker room.
“Jade, come back!” I yell it, but she’s already gone.
I don’t understand. What did I do wrong?
CHAPTER NINE
I have no idea what just happened. I must’ve moved too fast for her. Maybe she hasn’t been with many guys. Or maybe she’s not as into me as I thought she was. Maybe I misread her.
But she was holding on to me. Pressing up against me. Kissing me. Why would she do all that if she didn’t want to? Why would she let me keep touching her and kissing her if that’s not what she wanted? Why didn’t she just tell me to stop?
None of this makes sense. Everything was fine and then it’s like she just snapped. She was screaming and saying ‘I’ll never be you.’ What does that mean? Was she talking about me? I don’t understand.
I’m in the guys’ locker room now. I skip the shower and just change back into my clothes. I go outside and wait by the door to the girls’ locker room. A few minutes later, Jade comes out, her hair still wet. I’m leaning against the wall and she walks right past me, not noticing I’m there.
“Hey.” I say it softly so I don’t scare her. She stops and I step up behind her. I reach out and slip my hand around hers. I’m prepared for her to yank away from me and take off. But she doesn’t. Instead she turns around, her shoulders slumped forward, her head hung down. She looks so sad. And so alone.
Garret Page 8