by Mari Brown
“I’ll see what I can do.”
It was a week later I found the perfect opportunity to make it happen.
I was nervous pulling up to his house. An overnight bag in the passenger seat beside me taunting me calling me a harlot. I wanted to do this though. I wanted to know what it would be like to spend a whole night with him instead of a few stolen hours here and there. I didn’t know what he told his girlfriend, and I didn’t ask it was none of my business.
Upon entering his house a wonderful aroma hit me.
“I made us dinner.”
“You cook?”
“Sometimes. But I grill a mean burger.”
I giggle.
“I take it we are having burgers on the grill?”
“Yea Princess we are.”
His smile lights up his eyes. I can see he’s happy and so am I. My nerves are forgotten. We spent an hour laughing and talking over dinner. We worked together to clean up our mess before he led me into his living room.
“I figure we could watch a movie.”
“That sounds nice.”
I was feeling butterflies take flight in my stomach again. The nerves were back this felt oddly too much like a date and that he was putting much too much thought into making this night special.
As he flips on the TV I sit nervously my hands smoothing over my jean clad legs I’m not sure what to do with myself.
Tate pulls me into his side tucking me into him tight.
“Relax…”
Right relax. I'm spending the night with a guy who is not my husband. I haven’t been with another man like this in over seventeen years. It’s a little strange.
“Princess. We don’t have to do anything you aren’t comfortable with.”
“I’m nervous.”
His hand begins sliding up and down my arm in a comforting manner I begin to relax next to him.
Half way through the movie his hands begin traveling my body rubbing me close but not touching the good parts. Tease! His hand comes to my chin turning me to face him before taking me into a deep slow tender kiss. OH MY GAWD! This is HOT and makes me all tingly.
One thing leads to another and I’m being carted into his bedroom. He orders me to strip. I begin sliding my jeans off. He stands a few feet from me watching. Courage I didn’t know I possessed hits me and I begin doing a seductive little strip tease for him.
I am standing naked before him and a low growl comes from him. It’s my turn to watch as he strips down for me. Like a wolf stalking its prey he comes for me. His mouth devours me. The actions and words are lost in the haze of lust overtaking me.
He eventually gets me on all fours and plunges into me from behind, pulling my hair so that my head comes back to his body making hard contact. His lips are on my neck. It’s driving me insane. It’s not long before we both find our release.
Afterward as I lay in his arms, cuddled next to him he speaks.
“I love you Princess.”
“Did you just say that?”
I’m not sure those were the words he was looking for but it’s all that came out of my mouth. I am shocked. How did it go from stunt cock to love in less than three months? The weird thing is I wasn’t opposed to the love.
“Way to ruin a moment.”
“I’m sorry Tate. Really you took me by surprise.”
“I can tell.”
Silence ensues. I can tell that I have hurt his feelings. I feel horrible. I hadn’t thought about my feelings for him. I don’t want to say I love him just because he said it.
“Tate I care about you deeply I know that much but obviously you have thought about our relationship on a level I haven’t and I don’t know what to say to you.”
“It’s okay Princess I get it I shocked you.”
We lay there cuddling naked. I find comfort in his arms. At some point we drift off because I’m awoken in the middle of the night for round two. The next morning everything is fine between us.
As I get ready to leave he kisses me deep.
“I love you Princess and I’m going to give you time to chew on it but we will talk about our relationship.”
“Okay Tate.”
I drive home a mixture of emotions in my head. I’m married yet I’m happy another man just told me he loved me. I like that he loves me. Is it possible I love him too? Did we go from friends to lovers that quickly? I think it’s possible.
“Earth to Lori.” Pam’s voice brings me back to the group in front of me.
“Sorry I got lost in a memory.”
“We could tell by the stupid grin on your face.”
“What?” I’m still lost in my thoughts.
“What were you thinking about?” This time it’s Haley who asks.
“The first time Tate told me he loved me.”
“Oh girl you got it bad for this man. I want to know what the hot mechanic looks like.” Pam chimes.
“Me too.” Michelle now puts in her two cents.
“Yea I kind of ruined it by breaking up with him.”
My shoulders sag as I let out a deep sigh. I was so stupid. I thought I was doing the right thing. Maybe at the time I was. I did need to be there for Steve in the end but Tate would have understood and probably stood by my side when I needed him if I would have let him. He may be an asshole but he always was considerate of my relationship with Steve. Far more than I was of his relationship with LuAnn.
“Let’s head over to the Chrome Pipe. I’m ready to get my drink on.” Haley shifts the conversation away from me and Tate and I give her a small smile of thanks. I should have known she was up to something.
Ten minutes later we pull up in front of the bar. The parking lot is pretty full but not packed. I like when there is a good crowd for karaoke. As we walk through the doors I catch Haley looking around frantically. I wonder what is wrong with her until my eyes fall on the table she has stopped to stare at.
“What the fuck did you do?”
“Oh get your panties out of a twist.”
I am thinking of murder a lot these days. First my son now my best friend. And it all comes back to Tate the asshole. Pam and Michelle are sending Haley and me questioning looks as we stand there. Haley shrugs it off and begins walking toward her boyfriend. I sigh in defeat.
“Come on girls looks like you get your wish to meet Tate.”
“Really?” comes from both of them at the same time. I start following Haley and let the other two follow me.
Jake, Tate, Mike and Pete are sitting at a table. Empty beer bottles all around letting me know they had been there for a while.
“Princess good to see you again.” Tate smirks with a knowing grin.
“What happened to your friend?”
"I got rid of her a better offer came along.”
Oh I want to kill him now. And why am I happy that he got rid of her to come hang out here with us. I am not supposed to like this man at all. That’s right I don’t like him I’m fucking in love with the player. The one I will never have.
Chapter Seven
Haley makes introductions as Tate and I squabble. Damn him for making me feel alive. I’m not supposed to be happy and alive. I’m supposed to be wallowing in my misery. Why can’t anyone get that? My mother in law does and reminds me of it every chance she can get.
“Princess why don’t you have a seat right here.” Tate calls out while patting his lap.
If I was a more timid woman I would have been horrified. Instead my face heats slightly and turn from him and plant myself in Mike’s lap.
“Well hello sweetheart.” Mike says in my ear a little loudly.
“Keep your hands to yourself or I’ll make sure your junk never works again.” The guys wince as the ladies giggle.
I pointedly stare at Tate daring him to say something to me. He is giving me a hard gaze. Yea, he hates that I’m sitting in Mike’s lap. It won’t be long before he does something about it. I could move but I choose to push Tate’s buttons. I want to see what he does.
With a plop I find myself now seated in Tate’s lap. Girlish giggles follow. My so called friends are turning into traitors right before my eyes. Mike gives me a sly smile.
“Asshole!”
“Bitch!”
The only words spoken between Tate and me as I settle into his lap like it’s perfectly natural. In some ways it is. There were many a times I found myself sitting in his lap when we dated. It really irks me that I am so damn content to be in his lap his arm wrapped around my middle holding me tight to him. The moisture builds between my legs telling me just how much my body likes it.
This is always how it’s been with Tate. I have had mixed emotions from the beginning. I liked him I didn’t like him I loved him, I hated him, I felt at home with him yet I didn’t. It was a constant battle within myself. The first four months we were together I broke up with him weekly. Well I tried too but I couldn’t walk away from him. It was shortly after he told me he loved me that first time I realized why I couldn’t walk away. I loved him!
“Tate I hear you hired Noah today?” Haley directs her question to Tate and all eyes cut to us, well I guess Tate but I’m sitting in his lap so it feels as if they are on me as well.
“I did. Good kid, hard worker. I like the little shit.”
“Hey that’s my kid you’re calling a little shit!”
He gives me a knowing look. Fine. The kids a little shit but he’s my little shit and I love him.
“That’s what I thought.”
“Don’t get cocky jerkface.”
“Wouldn’t dream of it Princess.”
Ugg this man is so frustrating. Clearly my friends are amused by the way Tate and I banter with one another. Of course they think it’s cute. They aren’t the ones who have to deal with it. For that matter neither do I anymore. I move to get up but Tate’s arm tightens.
“Where are you going?”
“I want to go sign up to sing.”
Not a total lie. I did come here to have fun with karaoke. His grip loosens. That’s my signal that I’m free to get up. When I get back to the table I will have to figure out how to deal with Tate but at least I get a little reprieve.
I walk over to the DJ and quickly flip through the book finding the song I want. I already knew what I would be singing before I got up from the table. It’s hard to keep a straight face as I walk over to the bar and order myself a shot of tequila and a Corona Light. I down the shot at the bar and grab my beer and head back to my table of friends.
I barely make it back to the table before the DJ calls me up to the stage. A sly grin escapes me. Tate’s eyebrow arches up as he watches me walk up to the stage. I grab a mic. I take a couple deep breaths. I’m a bit of a karaoke diva. I love to sing and have fun doing it. I’m never going to be a professional but I won’t be booed off stage either. I also have stage presence probably because I’m use to making a fool of myself every day I teach for the kids in my class.
The first beats of Pink’s U & UR Hand rocks out of the speakers.
“This one is for you Tate.”
I say before I start rocking out the lyrics. I watch as Haley and Jake start laughing their asses off. Tate only looks at me mildly amused. I’m up and down the stage as the song carries on hell I don’t need the little teleprompter to sing this song. I am a huge Pink fan and her music is seared into my memory.
As the song nears the end I make my way off the stage and toward Tate. Like I rehearsed it before time. I end with myself plopped on his lap with a grin on my face singing,
“It’s just you and your hand tonight”
I hop up and walk back to the DJ handing him the Mic. The crowd is fired up over my performance especially ending it in Tate’s lap. Our table of friends are having too much fun giving Tate a hard time over my display. I admit I’m a bit nervous walking back to join them. I never know what mood Tate will respond with. Sometimes he takes things as a joke and sometimes he takes things like a dick… hard.
“So it’s just me and my hand tonight?”
I love that he’s laughing and enjoying himself.
“You might can sweet talk Mike into helping you out tonight.” I say with a laugh.
Mike just gives Tate a saucy wink. I would like to think my little show would have put Tate off but I think it just fired him up more. I’m jerked back into his lap. I give up. Tate is bound and determined to have me in his arms tonight. Honestly I don’t really fight too hard. I can always blame the beer in the morning even though I am sober right now.
“Who is singing next from our group?” I ask. I want to see someone besides me get up there.
Haley is already looking through a book while sitting next to Jake. Pam and Michelle decline saying neither one of them can carry a tune. I know the guys won’t sing except Tate. I crane my head around to face Tate. He just smirks.
“I need a beer babe.” I hop up. “Need another one?”
I look at my almost empty bottle and nod my head. I watch him saunter to the bar. I hope I’m not drooling. Pam leans over toward me.
“I can see why you lost your head with that one. Girl he still wants you.”
A sad smile crosses my face. “He just likes fucking me.”
He may have fond memories of our time together. He may have kept a couple mementos in his office the guy has feelings but he told me if I ended it not to ever come crawling back. He was hurt at the time. He had no idea what it was like for me at the time. My husband was dying my mother in law was calling me a brazen hussy at every turn. She didn’t care that I loved her son, or that I was doing everything I could to take care of him. All she saw was me “cheating”. Never considered Steve, and I had an agreement.
I can’t let myself keep going down that road. It’s time to move on with my life. It’s time to find a way to be happy without either man I loved even if it meant being alone.
“Princess…”
Tate is standing in front of me two beers in hand. I guess I need to stop getting lost in my own thoughts and join the land of the living.
“Sorry.” I stand up and grab my beer from him as he sits down. I don’t even try to fight him I just place myself gently back in his lap. “Thanks for the beer.”
“My pleasure. What were you thinking about just now?”
“Huh… oh nothing.”
“Really I know you better than that. Remember I know you.” His eyes bore into me. And his face is twisted with concentration.
Stupid man. Why does he have to be right? Why does he have to know me?
“It sucks to be alone.” I say it so soft. He doesn’t answer me right away so I think I’m lucky and he didn’t hear me.
“Come home with me tonight?”
He thinks that’s the answer to my problem. Although give me a couple more beers and I probably would agree with him.
“Why?”
Tate’s face is priceless as he looks at me like I have lost my mind.
“I asked, and I want you tonight.”
A million things cross my mind in a split second but my mouth overloads any thought.
“Okay…” Holy Shit! I’m out of my fucking mind. Why did I just agree to go home with Tate? I’m trying to move on without him not make more memories to forget. I take a long pull of my beer.
“Did you just agree to go home with Tate?” Haley has pulled my body to her. She whispers in my ear. “You go girl… get you some.” Her laugh makes me want to smack her but yea I’m looking forward to one last night with Tate. That’s all it can be for me. It’s all I can allow myself. One night of pleasure.
It’s not long before Tate’s name
is called to the stage. That is one thing Tate was good at but didn’t brag about it. Hell it was probably the only thing he didn’t brag about it.
My heart stops as the first bars of Blake Shelton’s She wouldn’t be Gone play. He’s always loved Blake and when he sings along with Blake on the radio it use to make my heart beat just a little faster. The funny thing I was not a huge country fan. I knew country, but it was not something I chose to listen to. Haley gives me a knowing smile. Pam and Michelle turn their attention to Tate. I can tell those two are smitten by him.
I don’t blame them. He has enough charm to get a nun to give it to him in a confessional with the priest listening in. It was yet another quality that I loved and hated about him. Even when he was using his charm to get his way with me I found it cute. Most of the time I would let him get away with it too. Tonight was one of those nights I was going to let his charm win out. I wanted what he was offering.
Tate’s rich vocals filled the bar. Woman were swooning all over the place. His eyes never left me for long. I am not sure if he was singing to me or afraid I’d run away while he was gone.
“I don’t know how you gave him up honestly Lori.” Pam is leaned over talking to me.
“I had no choice. I had Steve.”
“I’m sure it was a difficult time and I don’t even begin to understand what you went through emotionally.”
“One of the hardest times of my life.”
Sadness creeps in as I recall those days where I was without Tate. Tate was only the second man I ever loved. I lost the first one to death, and I lost Tate to bad timing. It is what it is though. Life goes on.
Tate finishes up his song, and he receives a loud round of applause from the bar. I smile at him as he approaches. Before I can say anything the DJ calls his name and mine.
“What did you do?” I ask him as he smiles at me mischievously.
“I wanted to sing a duet with you. Something we never got to do in public before.”
I groan but I stand up and follow him back up to the stage. I repress another groan as the song title appears on the prompter. “I Need You” a duet originally done by Tim McGraw and Faith Hill. I knew the song, and I wasn’t sure this was a good idea for me.