Twice Loved

by Mari Brown

  “Why are you still wearing clothes?”

  “I didn’t know I was supposed to be naked.”

  “How else we going to do what you want?”

  Oh well in that case… I jump off the couch and begin stripping. He pulls me in front of him facing the couch.

  “On your knees.”

  I’m a little nervous as he’s rock hard this time. We have no lube and I may be a little wet but nowhere what I was the other night when we did this. It doesn’t matter I still want it. I have my cheek resting on the coolness of the leather as Tate begins pressing into my tight opening. I take deep relaxing breaths so that I’m not fighting him. His head slips in making me groan from the slight pain. He slowly moves it around and I’m relaxing again.

  “Come back on me show me you want this cock in your ass.”

  I do what he commands I begin pushing my ass against his cock. He slides in further.

  “Oh fuck!”

  “Fuck is right!” He begins thrusting in me.

  It feels so damn good. I never dreamed it could be like this. I often read about anal sex in romance books and wondered if it would be as hot in person. Now I know. It is! I wouldn’t want this to be the only thing we do but I’m totally down for it more often. He continues to pound into me. I’m breaking a fucking sweat. How is that even possible maybe I’m helping him out more than I think I am? Shit I don’t know.

  “Move your knees in together.”

  I slide my knees together propping my elbows on the back of the couch. He begins going in and out faster. This is fucking fantastic. Then I realize I have an orgasm building up in me. I’m getting stimulation from the ways my legs are clasped together and his banging my ass. It’s not going to be long before he has me crying out in orgasm. I hear his moans and utterings behind me.

  “ooooohhhh my gawwwd. Oh my GAWD!” Tate cries out as he still in me. He just came in my ass. Even better his orgasm sent me tripping over the edge on my own orgasm. I slump down while keeping my ass up when he pulls out of me. I have no experience with how messy this can be. So I err on the side of caution. When I realize it’s not going to run out on its own I grab my clothes and head for the guest bathroom.

  Once I’m in there I sit on the toilet and begin the process of cleaning up while putting my shirt and panties back on before going back out in the living room. Tate has already dressed and is waiting for me. I grab my pants and slip them back on.

  “I’m going to smoke coming with?”

  “Yes.” I say rather enthusiastically. I need a fucking cigarette after that. It was mind blowing. We stand outside smoking and chatting while a light rain falls on us. It's cool and refreshing after what we just did.

  Tate maneuvers us back inside and we head to the living room “Let’s cuddle.”

  “Okay.”

  He lays down on his side and I lay down beside him curling my ass into his groin area. He cups his arm around me holding me securely to him.

  “So I like it.”

  “Oh yea?”

  “Yea I just wanted to make sure the first time wasn’t a fluke.” I feel his body shake as if he is silently chuckling which he probably is knowing him.

  “I told you… plus it helps I know what I am doing.”

  “I guess. I just wanted you to know I like it.”

  I may have admitted to him that I like it but I wasn’t going to tell him how much I liked it. I still didn’t trust Tate fully with my heart. This was giving him more of myself and he didn’t even realize it. I was going to end up getting burned by this but I can’t think about the future. I want to just live in the now and enjoy the time I have with him. I want to explore whatever we can explore together one day at a time. The rest would work itself out.

  We both grow quiet as we watch the show currently playing on the TV. While I don’t fall into a deep sleep I do feel myself dozing in his embrace. This is how it’s supposed to be when we are together. Fun carefree, no fighting, no drama. Just fun and friendship and a little love thrown in. We could build from this if we want to and make it something deeper and more meaningful or we could keep on like we were. Either one was a possibility. I knew which one I wanted but I didn’t dare speak of it. I didn’t want him giving me what I wanted because I asked for it. I wanted it because he was choosing to freely give it. I had to make sure we were on the same page before I started talking to my kids about him moving in. Because us having two houses but being in each other’s beds most every night was getting old fast.

  Tate’s phone rings. He picks it up off the back of the couch and I hear a string of cuss words leave his mouth. I briefly wonder who it is but just settle back in. Until it rings again. A few more choice words fly from him.

  “What the fuck do you want?” I hear a female voice but I can’t make out what they are saying

  “You’re what?” I feel Tate’s body tense behind me. I sit up and turn to look at his face it’s a mixture of shock, horror and disgust.

  More silence as the other person speaks to him.

  “You’re fucking crazy I want proof before I do anything.” He ends the call and hurls his phone across the room. It smashes into pieces. I silently think that’s going to be expansive.

  “Tate is everything okay?” I ask timidly. I can tell he is hot and honestly I don’t want to be on the receiving end of it.

  “That was fucking LuAnn calling to tell me she is pregnant and it's mine!”

  I stare at him at a loss.

  “When was the last time you slept with her?”

  “Eight weeks ago.”

  I take a deep breath before I ask my next question. “How far along is she?”

  “She claims she’s nine weeks pregnant.”

  I sigh. Chances are if she is pregnant the baby is his. That crazy bitch would do anything to keep her claws in Tate she was obsessed.

  “What are you going to do?”

  “Not a damn thing until I know it’s mine for sure.” he begins pacing the living room.

  I want to go to him and comfort him but unlike Steve when Tate is upset like this, my touch doesn’t soothe him instead it almost scorches him with pain to be touched. I stay where I am.

  Chapter Twenty-Nine

  Well this sucks ass! How the hell can LuAnn suddenly and conveniently be pregnant? If it’s true though Tate would do right by the child. That doesn’t mean getting back with LuAnn but it might mean her being part of his life forever anyway. Can I handle that? LuAnn in our lives forever, it makes me shudder.

  Tate and I are still so new into this second chance life has given us. Can we weather the storm? Tate is still pacing the floor. I see him stomp over to his pack of cigarettes on the kitchen counter he grabs the whole pack and heads out the back door it slams behind him. I debate in my mind to follow him or not. Should I give him some space or should I go after him. I pick up my phone.

  Lori: Shit just got real

  Haley: What’s going on?

  Lori: LuAnn

  That’s all I say before dropping my phone on the coffee table grabbing my own cigarettes and following Tate outside. As I exit into the backyard I see he’s pacing his small backyard. I don’t say anything I just place my cigarette pack on the table after pulling one out. I pick up his lighter bringing it up to my mouth

  “Don’t you dare fuckin’ do it” My hand stops midair. I freeze in my spot. I glance over at Tate who is marching toward me he rips the lighter from my hand flicks it. The bright flame lights up the night air. I suck in. He tosses the lighter back on the table.

  “Thank you.” what else can I say to him? I keep it simple and short.

  “What the fuck were you thinking?”

  “It’s just a fucking cigarette, and I was trying to be here but give you space at the same time.”

  He sighs

  “I can’t believe that bitch!” He starts pacing again. “What the fuck does it take to get rid of her?”

  “Honestly she is creepy obsessed with you. I think you have a sta
lker.” My words ring truer in my own ears as I hear them then when I just thought them.

  “Tell me about it.”

  I’m at a loss what to say to Tate right now. There are no real words that will bring him comfort. Let’s not forget that while trying to comfort him, I’m having to comfort myself as well. I am nervous and scared that this is going to ruin us. I’m just a slight bit selfish. There is a small part of me that wants to scream what about me? What about us?

  “What are you going to do?” I bravely ask Tate. His eyes darken as he stares at me.

  “Fuck if I know but somehow, someway I have to prove it’s not my kid.”

  “What if it is?” He don’t want to face that possibility, but it’s there.

  “There is no way that kid is mine.” He throws his butt into the bucket by the table at the same time he pulls another unlit smoke out. He’s going to smoke himself to death. The flame burns as he lights up. He begins pacing the area around us.

  “Tate?”

  “What?” he stops mid stride.

  “Don’t let her get you all worked up that’s what she wants.”

  He begins pacing again. I finish my smoke and put it out in the bucket. I get up.

  “You need anything?” He shakes his head no at me “I’m going inside the bugs are feasting on me right now.”

  “Okay babe.”

  I glance back one last time at my man as I walk inside. My heart hurts for him. He’s a good guy, but he makes a lot of bad choices. Entering the kitchen I place my pack on the counter before heading to the fridge. I poke around to see what he has to eat. I realize he has nothing… typical bachelor. Walking into the living room I reach down and pick my cell phone up before plopping down on the couch. I scroll through my apps until I get to the pizza one. I place an order and sit back to wait.

  My mind is running a thousand miles per hour. That conversation has left us with a lot to process. Without a doubt I won’t be asking Tate to move in with me and the kids anytime soon. I know that with what happened between Jake and Haley and now this shit with LuAnn we aren’t ready for that step. I’m glad I had not brought it up with my kids yet or Tate.

  The doorbell rings and I get up with cash in hand so I can tip the driver. The young kid at the door hands me the pizzas and a receipt to sign for my debit card. I make my way to the kitchen with the hot steaming pizzas. Tate is still outside. I stick my head out the back door looking around I see Tate is sitting in a chair nearby.

  “Hey I have fresh hot pizza in here.” I call out softly.

  “Thanks I’ll be right in.”

  I close the door back. I hate there isn’t more I can do for Tate. Time is the only solution to this problem. We, more especially Tate has to wait this out and see what happens. I grab a couple plates out of the cabinet. I open a box of pizza and place a couple slices on a plate for me. I take it back in the living room with me. I settle in on the couch pulling my phone out and I google search for prenatal paternity testing. I begin reading the information.

  At some point Tate walks into the living room, I am not even sure when he came back in the house. He sits down beside me on the couch. He has a plate of pizza in his lap His face is full of worry lines and I wish there was more I could do to help him. He has to deal with this in his own time and his own way.

  “What are you looking at Princess?”

  Glancing down at the screen and back to him, “I’m researching paternity tests.”

  He sighs heavily. “Can I get it done soon?”

  “It looks like you can have one done as early as twelve weeks but either method of testing have a risk for miscarriage. You may have to face that LuAnn won’t do it until the baby is born.”

  I lift a slice of pizza to my mouth, taking a nibble and chew as I watch his face. The myriad of expressions that cross it as he processes what I have just told him are almost comical.

  “So what you’re saying is I’m fucked until the baby is born and a safer method of testing can be done?”

  My face softens. I angle my body toward Tate. He doesn’t want to hear this. Any of it.

  “Yes I’m afraid so.”

  “How am I supposed to be there for her if I’m not even convinced it’s mine? Hell I’m not even convinced she’s pregnant yet.”

  “I don’t know.” I set my plate on the table in front of us. “You have to do the right thing though.”

  “What the fuck is the right thing?” He exclaims. His face clouding more with anger. His eyes are round and dark. The lines on his face tight and drawn I want to reach my hand up and smooth away those lines.

  “You treat her as if she is pregnant, and it’s yours until you know for sure.”

  “This fucking sucks!” He takes a savage bite of pizza and chews like an angry bull.

  We remain in silence as each of us is lost in our own thoughts. We both finish eating. Tate reaches down and turns on the TV. I don’t even think he’s really watching it. It’s more background noise than anything right now. He looks so lost and confused.

  “Tate?”

  “Hmmm?”

  I twist so that I can see him clearly. “I think I’m going to go home. We both have thinking to do and I didn’t bring my stuff for school tomorrow either.”

  “Oh and I guess Haley is going to be at your place again?”

  “Yea she’s staying in the guest room until she decides what she wants to do about Jake.”

  “Fucking Idiot!”

  That’s the most Tate, and I have discussed about the situation between our two closest friends. Without discussing it we somehow agreed to not talk about the situation between our friends. I was thankful for that because right now my thoughts were not very kind toward Jake. It wasn’t that I hated him but I did hate what he had done to my friend. I still couldn’t believe he was making out with some random girl in the bar. I wondered if it had been a one-time thing or something that had always been going on.

  Tate and Jake were both ladies men before meeting Haley and I. Was it too much to assume that they had straightened up and were only about their current girlfriends? I cut my eyes over to Tate and watch him. I try to decide if Tate is also still carrying on behind my back? It would be difficult though seeing as we are together almost every moment he isn’t working. There were very few nights we were not spending the night together. Even fewer that we didn’t see each other.

  That didn’t mean he wasn’t talking to others on his phone but then I recall he’s not been as secretive with his phone as he was the first time we are together. He gave me the password to get into his phone and he didn’t seem to mind if I touched it anymore. Yes there was more proof that Tate was being honest with me this time around. That I was the only woman in his life but a small part of me still feared. The old saying once a cheater always a cheater runs through my mind.

  “Can I get a blowjob before you go?” Tate’s face holds a mischievous grin.

  I chuckle as I reply “What do I get in return?”

  “How about eight inches in that sweet pussy?”

  Oh swoon! He says such sweet things to me. I swear it’s what every woman wants to hear. Okay maybe I do get a little turned on when he talks to me that way. However, it would be nice every once in a while to hear some sweet words from him as well.

  “I love you Princess!”

  “I love you too!”

  He angles his body toward me pulling me to him by the front of my shirt. As he pulls me into him his head dips down and his lips devour mine. I love kissing this man. I love touching him. Hell I just plain love him for real. I’d be lost without Tate in my life. I wonder briefly why I’m so addicted to the man. Is this a healthy need? Is this relationship the best one for me? I honestly don’t know the answers to my own questions.

  We continue making out on the couch. Even though we just did all this a few hours ago here we are like two horny teenagers going at each other again. It makes me feel better that Tate appears to have the same addiction to me that I have to h
im. I don’t feel as weird about the craving knowing it’s not just me who has it.

  Its two hours before I actually make it home. Tate distracts me and sometimes it’s not a good thing. Other times it’s like my own slice of heaven. Pulling up to my home I sit quietly in the car reflecting on all that has happened with Tate today. There is so much to consider. Can I deal with LuAnn being part of his life forever? Right now it’s a possibility that is what Tate is facing. If LuAnn is pregnant and Tate is the father he will never be free of her. She never goes away. She’s like a cancer eating at Tate.

  The house is quiet as I enter. The kids must be in their rooms. Both their cars are in the driveway so they have to be home. I’m surprised to find Olivia with books in front of her at the kitchen counter. The smell of something delicious baking in the oven wafts throughout the room.

  “Hey mom. Have a good time?” My daughters asks me looking up from her textbook.

  I set my purse on the counter as I sit down on a stool next to her. My elbows rest in front of me. “Eh…. It was good and not so good.” I let my head fall into the palms of my hands as I speak. “LuAnn is back, and it’s not looking good”

  “What do you mean mom?” Olivia’s face clouds with concern at my declaration.

  “The bitch is claiming she’s pregnant with Tate’s baby.”

  The pen in her hand is tossed on to the countertop “What the hell?” Shock and disbelief is clear in her tone.

  “Tell me about it.” My body heaves with the sigh I let out “I don’t know if I can deal with that.”

  “Mom….” Olivia turns to me her hands reaches out and takes one of mine. “Do you love Tate?”

  “Yes… Yes I do.” there is no denying I love that man. He drives me crazy and I can’t get enough of him.

  “Then don’t let LuAnn tear you apart.”

  “I agree with your daughter.” Haley’s voices pipes in. I almost forgot she was still staying with us. She wears a ratty T-shirt and sweat pants her hair sticks out all over and I fight the urge to laugh. It’s hard to take her serious when she looks like the walking dead. “That bitch needs to learn she can’t get what she wants with lies and manipulations anymore.”