Rival Dreams (Rival Love #3)

by Natalie Decker

  Kayla enters the room and jingles her keys. “Oh, but we are. It’s settled. Girl talk.”

  I look over at Lidia who flinches but says, “Okay.”

  Traitor.

  Once we tell my mom the kind of flavors we want, she and Kayla are off.

  Lidia gives me a look that screams we should run from this joint. I’d love to. But I’m kind of stuck to my bed, strapped to monitors, with tubes in my arms. “This feels like a bad idea.”

  “You think? Why did you agree? You know you can easily disappear in the hospital. Meanwhile, I’m stuck here.”

  Lidia nods. “If it makes you feel any better, my mom still doesn’t know the details about what happened between Malcolm and me. I mean, she knows we’re not together, but not the full reason. God, and she keeps asking me if there are any other boys I’m interested in. Sometimes I lie. Sometimes I just name the last one-night stand I had.”

  I feel sorry for her. She’s still hung up on Malcolm, and the sick part is they haven’t been together for almost a year. God, if she can’t move on, how the hell am I going to?

  “Do you think we found our soul mates too young and that’s why we’re ruined?” Lidia asks.

  Tears prick my eyes. Every time I thought about Caleb and what he was to me, my soul actually felt complete. Warm, elated, and just full; I can honestly say I’ve never felt that with anyone else. He constantly challenged me, and he got me in ways that others barely could. “Caleb is mine, but I’m not ready for all that comes with it now. He’s leaving. I’m here.”

  “I know. It’s like you can follow, but what happens if everything goes to shit? Then what? You come back home. Where the hell is that exactly? I attend Columbia because it’s free and it’s a good school. Plus I don’t have to live in those dorms. But other than that it doesn’t feel … I don’t know … like I belong there.”

  “And you’ve been living there all your life. I know. That’s how I feel about this place sometimes. You tell anyone this, I will hurt you.” I give her my best mean face and she just laughs. “I thought this was what I wanted. I love the school, don’t get me wrong, it’s just … lately it feels really empty. I don’t know if it’s because my memories of this place are tainted with him, or if it’s really because my dreams are elsewhere.”

  “Exactly,” Lidia says with a smile. “That’s exactly how I feel. Malcolm and I weren’t on campus together that much, but that house, our street, the buildings around us—our relationship is smeared all over the place. It’s hard getting through one day without some thought of him.”

  The door opens again. Both of our moms and Kayla come in bearing gifts of Ben and Jerry’s. I indulge in my favorite, turtle cheesecake, while Lidia devours cake batter. Kayla is digging into Everything but the … , and Julie surprises me when she scoops spoonfuls of Half Baked into her mouth. My stepmom is a calorie counter and I thought I’d die before seeing her down some ice cream. Julie moans and my mom almost loses her grip on her Chubby Hubby. “My goodness, Julie, are you okay over there?” she asks.

  Lidia snorts with laughter and so do I. Kayla just looks at the two of us like we’ve lost our minds. My mom is concerned about Julie and Julie smiles. “I haven’t had ice cream in ten years. I forgot how delicious it is.”

  My mom’s eyes bulge. “Ten years? Really? Good Lord, woman, you deserve a medal.”

  Kayla clears her throat. “Ladies, before we get carried away, I’d just like to point out why we’re all here.”

  My mom smiles at Kayla. “Right you are.” She looks at Lidia and then me. “When there was a chance I might lose you, it put my life into perspective. Skylar, before the accident I noticed a change in you. Not a good kind. Lidia, there is a change in you too. Last Christmas, you were distant and uncheerful. I’m worried about you girls.” She turns back to Kayla. “Don’t even think for one second you’re getting out of this, missy. I saw you during the holidays and you had the deepest frown. I’ve kept quiet, told myself you ladies would figure it out. But I can’t sit back and watch anymore, so Julie and I are going to be your ears. We’re going to give you advice—not as mothers but as adults. Mothers tend to be a little more smothering and give bad advice because they want the child in you to never grow up. We tend to hold on. You’ll know someday, when you are moms.”

  I swallow down a bit of turtle cheesecake and glance at Lidia and Kayla. Crap. We’re in for it now.

  Julie looks at all of us. Her dark eyes land on me. “How about you go first.”

  “Me? Why me?”

  “Call it intuition but I think you need more advice than these two.”

  My mom nods. What has the world come to?

  I huff and shove my spoon into my ice cream, not looking at them anymore. “Fine.”

  I take a bite of the wonderfulness that is supposed to make all of life’s problems seem smaller than they are, but in this case it’s not helping. “Caleb and I broke up on Valentine’s Day.”

  My mom gasps. “And you didn’t tell me?”

  “Obviously. I just … I was still in shock. Still am. I mean, what the hell? I should have seen it. All the signs were there. He was acting weird. He didn’t come apartment hunting with me. He stopped checking to see if I made it home from work okay. But I told myself whatever it was it would be okay.” I shake my head. “To get even more bizarre, I got talked into going to his going-away party. Everything was fine, until he punched Brie’s boyfriend, who was just helping me through a crowd to get to the …” Shit. My mom doesn’t know I drink even though I’m not legally old enough. I chew my lip and mumble, “ … water. There was a crowd. You know, because it was where people were drinking. I wasn’t.”

  I look at my mom and she shakes her head. “Skylar, I’m not stupid. I know you drink. Just don’t drink and drive. Got me?”

  Oh. This just got strangely weirder. “Okay, fine. I was getting a drink because he was there. I couldn’t exactly handle seeing him while I was sober so I thought drinking might help. As I was getting a beer, Caleb decided to make an ass of himself. He decked Brie’s boyfriend and accused me of flaunting my next conquest in front of him just to piss him off. So I stormed out of his dumb party, but not without giving him his gift.

  “Anyway, the next day he left me a note. So I left him one. Then he left and … well, he was texting me, calling me. It was like we were us again. It was strange. I didn’t know if we were an us, or if he was just trying to be friends. But if I’m really honest with myself I can’t be his friend. I’m way beyond that and feel way too much to go back to being just a friend. You know?”

  “Honey,” Julie starts, but I hold up my hand.

  “Hold on, there’s more. Then his friend Matt keeps hanging on me. It’s creepy. The night of my accident he showed me a picture of Caleb and some girl.”

  Kayla grumbles, “Not him.”

  “What did you say?”

  She looks up at me with wide eyes and blushes. “What? Didn’t …” All eyes are on her and she groans. “Ugh, fine. He was supposed to tell you this. But it’s not him. Call me crazy, but I believe him.”

  I stare at Kayla. “Even if it wasn’t him, which is a big if, the fact still remains he’s leaving. How am I supposed to make this work? I don’t want another Valentine’s Day episode. I can’t handle it.”

  Julie pats my leg. “Love is about a lot of compromise. I know you especially don’t want to hear this, but I went through this with your father. Him popping in and out of our lives. I loved him a lot. And yes, the way we did things was wrong, but I knew he was my match in every way possible. I put up with the distance and waded through the crap because my happy ending was very near.”

  God, she’s right, I really don’t want to hear this. I really don’t want to resent her any more than I already do. And I thought my mom might react to what she said but she remains calm and collected, eating her ice cream with a smile. Is this actually happening right now?

  Chapter 30

  Caleb

  Lanc
e enters my temporary room. “Kayla said she’s coming over later. Do you mind if she stays over? We might get some food see a movie and then come back here. But if you’re not cool with that I can go to her place.”

  “That’s cool, man. I don’t care.”

  “Awesome. So … you going to see Sky?”

  I shake my head. “Nah.”

  I haven’t been at the hospital in three days. Do I want to see Skylar? Of course I do. But I’ve gotta give the girl her space. Even if it’s killing me to do it.

  Lance takes a seat on the futon and says, “You should go see her.”

  “Why, so I can hear how much she hates me? Or see it pouring out of her eyes when she looks at me? I’m good. Besides, I’ve got football to worry about.”

  He nods. “Yeah, I know what you mean.”

  We don’t talk about the hospital or girls anymore. He leaves and I go back to neatly stacking my things. As I make sense of my mess, I spot the box she handed me. I snatch up the snow tiger stuffed animal biting a heart that says “I love you to bits.”

  And then I take off for the one place where I didn’t want to go.

  ***

  I knock on her door and open it.

  Sky’s eyes are shut and she’s softly mumbling in her sleep. “I need … you.”

  Very quietly, I walk over to her bed and sit down in the chair next to it. “Caleb …” she mutters, her eyes still closed.

  I want to respond, “I’m here.” But I can’t.

  “Love … come … please …”

  I gently lift her arm and tuck the tiger under it. She moans lightly and turns on her side, taking the tiger with her. “I love you,” I whisper, and bending over her, I kiss the corner of her mouth.

  I sink back down in my seat and watch her for a few more minutes. Then I write her a note, put it on her food table, and walk out of the room.

  ***

  Sky has been out of the hospital for about two weeks now. I wasn’t there to pick her up. Kayla said she needed space and I really believe that.

  So I’ve been busy with training. It helps keep my mind off doing impulsive things like running up to Sky’s room and begging for forgiveness.

  “Hi, Caleb!” I turn and spot Vicki. Christ. Why won’t this girl leave me the hell alone?

  “Hey.” I go back to throwing passes downfield to Vince, who volunteered to be my receiver.

  “Are you busy?” she shouts.

  Is she blind? Of course I am busy.

  “I think … we need to talk.”

  I glance back at her just in time to see Skylar crutch past. Matt is with her. He keeps trying to sling an arm around her shoulder and she’s shoving him away. I grit my teeth and set off. I hear Vince screaming at me. I hear Vicki yelling, too. Problem is, I don’t want anyone to stop me.

  My feet clear the fence and I’m on a full sprint. Matt barely turns when I jack the side of his face with my fist. He hits the ground cursing. Skylar grips the front of my shirt and pushes me back. “What are you doing?” she demands.

  “He was … you didn’t want him … did you?” I ask, a little winded, but full of adrenaline.

  Matt stands and starts to come at me but Skylar stands between us. “That’s enough. Both of you.”

  Matt growls, “Move, Skylar. I’m going to kick his ass.”

  “Enough! No one is kicking anyone’s ass.” She pushes against me more. “You. You’re coming with me. Right now.” She looks back at Matt. “And you need to stay away from me.”

  “Because of him?” he yells as she pulls me away. I let her.

  We near the field and she stops pulling me and glares at someone charging toward us. “Caleb! Are you okay?”

  I cringe. Skylar snaps, “Go hump a tree, girly. We’re talking here, and I’m not in the mood.”

  “Who the hell are you, talking to me like that?” Vicki says.

  Sky curls her fingers into tight balls at her side. I swallow. “Don’t,” I breathe. “Vicki, for the last time, I’m not interested. I’ll never be interested, because you’ll never, ever, be this girl.” I look over at Sky and then back to Vicki. “So, go.”

  Her lower lip trembles. Usually I feel bad about making a girl cry, but I can’t this time. Not when I’ve told her repeatedly I’m not interested. She runs off just as Sky shoves me. “You’re so bipolar.”

  “What do you mean?” I ask.

  She narrows her eyes and rests her hands on her hips. “I saw the photo, Caleb. She was in your lap and you two were kissing. Probably did a whole lot more. And yet you won’t date her because she’s not me? If that’s the case, why did we even break up? Why am I missing you all the time? Why?”

  “Because I needed you to stick with your dream. If you didn’t, you’d end up hating me. I don’t know where I’m going to end up. There are a couple of teams interested in me, but it won’t really matter because someone else can easily snag me up on draft day. The point is, my future is up in the air. You need to be here.” I tuck a strand of hair behind her ear and bring her face closer to mine. “I love you, so much. You worked so hard to get here, your dream school, I will never take that away from you. So, that meant I had to let you go. I’m sorry.”

  Liquid touches my thumb as I caress her cheek. I wipe away the tear and kiss her lips. “Please don’t cry, baby. Please.”

  “I can’t help it. You don’t want me anymore.”

  I smile against her lips. “That’s not it. I want you very much. I just want you to accomplish your dream first. Then I can ask you to be mine again. If you still want me.”

  She sniffles and stares at me. “And what if I’m with someone?”

  “Then I’ll have lost the best damn thing in my life and it will be my own fault.”

  “But you’re not making it easy to move on.”

  “Is that what you want? To go out with Matt or some other guy?”

  She looks down at the ground. I pull her chin to make her look up at me, but she turns away. “I don’t know. It seems easier to just let you go and never think about it again.”

  “But?”

  “My heart is stupid.”

  I try to kiss her again but she pulls away. “I can’t. Just … I can’t.”

  I nod.

  “I’m trying to go through the motions without you. You’re not making it easy. Especially when you punch every guy who touches me.”

  “Matt should keep his fucking hands to himself,” I growl.

  She shakes her head, her dark hair whipping from one side to the other. “This is what I’m talking about. You can’t keep doing this stuff. Either be with me or don’t. But don’t sit here and get jealous or get into fights with the people who are interested in me. It’s not fair.”

  “Fine. You won’t have to worry about me anymore.” I am pissed now. She basically told me to go screw myself. I walk back to the field.

  Vince shrugs at me. “We ready?”

  “Yeah. We’re good.”

  Chapter 31

  Skylar

  It’s Easter weekend. Instead of spending the holiday with my mom, I fly out to my dad’s. I need to avoid Caleb. It’s the only way to get on with my life, and clearly he doesn’t want me until I graduate. Well, he’s got another thing coming if he thinks I’m going to sit around pining for him for two years.

  Men. Ugh. They’re so stupid.

  “There she is,” Lidia says as she meets me at the baggage claim.

  “Hi.” I hug her and we walk over to the carousel.

  As we stand there waiting for my bag, Lidia jabbers on about some test she had and this idiot who sat next to her and drooled the entire time. She starts to say, “It’s utterly …” and trails off. I look at her, waiting for her to finish, but she’s stiff as a statue. Her face flushes and I smack her shoulder.

  “What’s up? Are you going to puke?”

  She blinks and mumbles, “He’s here.”

  “What?” I look around, thinking she better not be talking about Caleb. Although m
y heart jumps at the thought, I would be really mad at him. I did this to get space. But my eyes don’t see Caleb. They find Malcolm.

  “Just breathe, Liddy.”

  “I’m going to get us a cab.”

  She starts to turn but freezes when a deep male voice shouts, “Lidia!”

  Her shoulders shake and then she raises her head. I think she’s about to go to him but instead she runs out the door. Oh, crap. This is way worse than I thought. Malcolm runs a little ways but I latch on and stop him. “Let her have some time, Malcolm.”

  He turns to me. “Babycakes! Whoa. You’re here for Easter? Is, um … your man here?”

  “I have no man. And yes, I’m here for Easter because I want to avoid said man.” I hug him. “I still hate that nickname.”

  He gives me a crooked grin, his blue eyes glimmering. “I know. How come your sister just ran off like that?”

  I shake my head. “I don’t know. So how have you been?”

  “Eh … I’ve been okay. How’s Lidia been?”

  I spot my bag coming around the carousel and snatch it up. “Honestly, she’s been okay. Not happy and giddy like usual.” What else can I say? Dude, you broke her heart, how do you think she’s doing?

  He walks with me outside. Lidia is talking to a cabdriver when I approach. She looks at me and then blanches when she sees Malcolm towering behind me. She hisses, “Why is he here?”

  I shrug. “I don’t know. Can we just get in the cab?”

  She points at Malcolm. “You are so not coming in this cab. Go fetch your own.”

  Malcolm takes a couple steps back and gives me a puzzled look. I shake my head. I don’t want to be in the middle of this. I’ve got my own problems to sort out. She slides into the backseat while I hand my bag to a man with salt-and-pepper hair. He puts it in the trunk and I hop into the backseat with Lidia.

  She clenches and unclenches her fists. I place my hand on her knee and smile at her. “It’s going to be okay.”