This Guy Kills Me

by Anlyn Hansell

“I never -”

  “Because if you are, we need to talk about that. So…are you?” she interrupted him.

  It was like a tub of ice water over his head. The mood or whatever was passing between them was certainly broken. She was certifiable. She had to be. No normal person would even think to talk about this.

  “Jane, listen -”

  “Ooo…cake,” she stated as a waiter walked by holding two plates of what appeared to be multi-layered chocolate cake decorated with some crazy huge chocolate pieces situated on top.

  “Can I get a piece of that?” Her eyes were still fixed on the waiter as he set the two plates down on a table beyond Joe’s shoulder.

  “Umm. Sure, yeah. Listen, Jane -”

  “I like chocolate cake. Wait – did you say sure? You did! I’m going to hold you to that. No changing your mind.” She was pointing her fork in his general direction with a smile on her face.

  Definitely.

  Certifiable.

  *****

  “Noooo. No cuff.”

  “Yes cuff. Give me your foot,” he ordered from the end of the bed.

  “Joe. Let’s talk about this rationally. I’m not going anywhere. Where would I go? I don’t have a dime to my name; I certainly can’t walk all the way to Hamtramck from here. Besides, it’s snowing out. This bed is fantastic. Why would I even think about leaving?”

  “Jane -”

  “You can trust me, Joe. Besides, I’m so full, I can barely move,” she announced from her perch near the headboard of the massive bed.

  “Foot. Jane. Now.” He was flicking his wrist at her impatiently.

  “But…oh, whatever. Here, put it on.” She extended both legs out and shot him an angry glare as he fastened it.

  “There. Stop making that face. Movie’s about to start.” He indicated the TV with his head.

  “Big whoop,” she pouted, her arms crossing over her chest.

  “Jane? Stop pouting. This is a necessity,” he explained in his rational voice.

  “It is not. You still don’t trust me, you big doofus. I have helped you out I don’t know how many times and this is how you repay me. Nice. Thank you. Go away.” She was looking down at the cuff.

  “Jane? Look at me.” He was crawling up the bed toward her.

  “No. Hating you right now,” She muttered; her eyes cast downward.

  “No, you don’t. Stop acting like a brat. Look at me.” He was only a few inches from her face…

  She purposely kept her eyes averted until his fingers were tipping her chin up toward him.

  “Maybe I’m doing this to keep you safe. Did you ever think of that?” he stated softly.

  Her eyes snapped to his. “Why would putting a tracking device on me keep me safe?”

  “It just…it could…” he whispered as their eyes drank each other in.

  He was leaning in. She closed her eyes and followed suit; it was about damn time anyway…

  Her lips parted just in time for something to touch her nose gently. Both eyes popped open but he was already pulling his index finger back.

  “Sleep tight.” He was smiling at her, backing away, pushing up from the bed as she sat in a stunned stupor.

  She kept her mouth shut as she silently seethed. He was casually shrugging on his coat and from his body language, she could tell, he was totally unaffected.

  Big doofus.

  *****

  Every nerve in his body was coiled so tight to the point of snapping. He closed the door behind him and immediately leaned against the wall, thumping the back of his head before resting it against the hard surface with a long drawn out sigh. What was that? How many times had he fantasized about crawling up her body? Except in his fantasy, she was naked, and he was kissing every surface of her skin as he slowly made his way toward her lips. And she was sighing or moaning or sometimes jamming her fingers in his hair, breathing out his name. Joe. I want you, Joe…

  This had to end. He either had to let her go before he did something stupid or he needed to do something stupid. She was leaning in too so she was just as much at fault as him. Although why she would want to kiss him, he had no idea. Maybe she had some serious Stockholm Syndrome. Maybe she was lonely and he just happened to be available or maybe, just maybe, she felt something for him. He certainly felt something for her. In his pants…but there was more. He wouldn’t think about it. He wouldn’t scratch the surface of that strange feeling he experienced whenever he looked at her or argued with her or joked with her.

  This wasn’t the plan. Feeling anything for the girl lying in the room behind him was not part of the plan. This was so much bigger than the two of them. So much more than fighting an attraction that was as surprising as it was annoying.

  Focus.

  Breathe. Count to 10. Put this foot in front of that foot and walk, you big doofus.

  *****

  It was noon now, and he still hadn’t come back. Or maybe he came back last night and left again. His side of the bed wasn’t touched. Maybe he slept on the couch. Maybe…oh stop thinking.

  She pulled the room service menu out and perused it before grabbing the phone near the bed and dialing.

  He wasn’t there to stop her, so she ordered a bacon cheeseburger and fries with a side of mayonnaise. Hopefully it would arrive before he did. If he ever did. What if something happened to him? What then?

  Would she be stuck with this stupid cuff on for the rest of her life?

  Speaking of cuffs…She looked toward the bathroom and back down at the small contraption encircling her ankle. Was this stupid thing waterproof? Would it zap her if she got it wet? Would it even work if it was wet, and why would she care? She pulled her foot up, settling it on her thigh and examined it closely. The locking mechanism was odd shaped, sort of a half-moon…maybe she could shove a bobby pin in it…

  Half an hour later and nothing seemed to work. It wasn’t budging. A knock on the door made her jump up from the couch and look around before she realized it was just room service. Pulling her pajama pants down to hide the cuff, she trudged across the room and opened the door. A man was standing on the other side in a crisp black uniform. A young man, maybe her age, maybe a little younger. His eyes went from dull to keen in a split second as he took her in.

  “Uh, hi!” he stated nervously, shifting his weight from one foot to the other.

  “Hi. Here, I’ll just take that.” She held her hand out toward the metal covered dish on the rolling cart.

  “No. I mean, no, I’ll wheel it in, could you just um…” He was indicating that she move aside with his hand. She looked back toward the empty room and back at the man. Joe would kill her if he knew she let someone in their room, of course Joe was gone. And she wouldn’t be in this position if he was here. But he wasn’t here and she was forced into a rather awkward situation. She reluctantly backed away but clenched her fists as he gave her a slight nod and began to wheel the cart into the room. She watched him closely, giving him plenty of space but placing one foot behind the other in a defensive stance just in case…

  In case what? Was she that paranoid? This guy seemed innocent enough. He was delivering food. What if he lifted the metal cover and pulled out a gun? Maybe she was watching too much TV. Maybe…

  He lifted the cover and her body immediately crouched down behind the sofa. After a few seconds, her head poked up and saw…

  A cheeseburger with fries and no gun. Oh! And a man that was staring at her with the strangest expression on his face.

  “Ah…dropped something…” she muttered.

  “Can I get you anything else?”

  How about the phone number of a good shrink?

  “Ah…nope. That’ll do. Looks good. Thanks.”

  He was still standing there, watching her, waiting. Waiting for what?

  “Um. Ok then, thanks again.” She prompted before realization dawned. She had no money. He was either waiting for a tip or he was going to pull a gun from the waistband of his uniform pants and aim it at her.r />
  Cut it out! No more TV.

  “I…ah, I’m really sorry, but I don’t have any money on me right now. But…I’ll make sure I get you a tip…later. Ok? Would that work?” He was staring at her. His eyes swept from her legs up to her face before his eyes locked with hers. Aaaaand…Let the tunnel vision begin.

  Oh boy.

  Apparently he had some ideas of ways she could tip him without the use of money; mainly with her mouth.

  “Puppies,” she blurted.

  “Excuse me?”

  “Yeah. Ah…did you bring mayonnaise?” Wrong thing to say. Suddenly her own face was visible to her, otherwise engaged with a certain part of his anatomy and that was not mayonnaise on her face. Oh gawd. Look away dude, look for the mayonnaise…

  “Yuck.”

  “What?”

  Her hand immediately clamped over her mouth as she sidestepped toward the door, his eyes still fastened to hers. I control it. It does not control me. If he would only look away…

  Suddenly, her eyes were focused on the side of his face. Her gaze swept toward the direction he was looking at. Joe stood at the opened door, his eyes shifting back and forth between them. He didn’t look too pleased. Relief washed over her as she released the clamped hand on her mouth and took two steps toward him.

  “Hi…honey. Ah…could you give a Doug a tip?”

  “How do you know my name?” she could hear in the background before her face scrunched up.

  Well, Doug…in your vision I was moaning it repeatedly. “Umm, when I ordered, the lady on the phone said Doug would bring it up,” she lied, looking toward Joe. His eyes narrowed slightly before he cast his gaze down toward his hands. They were opening his wallet and a couple bills were pulled out.

  “Here ya go. Thanks.” He held out the bills and stepped to the side to allow the younger man to exit the room. As soon as he cleared the door, Joe shut it and stood in front of it for a moment, staring at her.

  “What did you do?”

  “Nothing. I ordered some food, because you were gone and I was starving. That’s all.”

  “That’s not what I’m talking about.” One eyebrow shot up in irritation.

  “Oh, that. Yeah, Doug was having some nasty thoughts, but I controlled it. I did! You would’ve been proud of me.” She smiled brightly.

  Something surged through him, tightening his stomach, nerves flaring… “What kind of nasty thoughts?”

  “You don’t wanna know, believe me. Where have you been?” she changed the subject, her head cocked to the side.

  What was that feeling? It was unfamiliar and disturbing. It pissed him off and confused him at the same time. What is that? Am I…? No, that’s not…jealousy? NO. She’s just annoying, that’s all. She just annoys you.

  “I was busy. So, what do we have here?” He tamped down whatever weirdness he was feeling and wandered over to the white linen draped cart before she quickly placed herself between the cart and his body.

  “Nothing. Just…lunch. You were gone, my stomach was growling, I wasn’t sure if you were ever coming back. Don’t touch that.”

  He had stepped around her, reaching for the metal cover.

  Too late.

  “Have I taught you nothing this past month?” He was scowling down at the plate. Her eyes followed suit. The cheese was sort of oozing out the side of the bun; shiny pieces of bacon were poking their tasty little selves out also. A heap of shoestring french fries surrounded the burger like a nest of yummy deliciousness.

  “Why do you do that to yourself?” he mumbled as he placed the cover back on and wandered toward the bedroom. He was muttering some other stuff but she completely disregarded it as she lifted the cover and began to devour her food.

  *****

  “We need to talk,” he stated from his seated position on the bed. Her hands stopped rubbing the towel over her wet hair as she took in the duffle bags neatly piled by the door to the main room.

  “Ooohkay…” Her eyes shifted back to his as a strange feeling crept up her spine. Were they moving on to another location or was she…what did he want to talk about?

  “What do you -” A shrill ring interrupted her mid-sentence causing them to look toward the source of the sound. His phone lay on the top of the dresser as well as his wallet and some spare change.

  He cleared his throat and focused his attention on her once again. Opening his mouth, the sound sort of drowned out what he was about to say. She watched as he blew out a frustrated breath and tried again, only to be silenced by the ring tone.

  “Hold that thought.” He raised his index finger and popped off the bed between rings. After grabbing it, he was about to press a button to silence it before the number caught his eye and he immediately answered it.

  Jane watched as he answered the call and wandered from the bedroom. Her eyes settled on the luggage as his voice seemed to rise. He seemed excited about something answering “Really?” about five times in a row. He threw in an “I can’t believe it” also. She took a few steps toward the door to see him pacing with the phone pressed to his ear. Whatever or whomever it was seemed to have good news, at least based on his reaction. “When? Yes. All right, then. I’ll let her know. Today? Of course. Good. Great!” he stated before walking back into the bedroom, tossing the phone on the bed and turning toward her with a brilliant, panty igniting smile.

  “What?”

  “She has a liver. Finally... It took so long, but now, she has a liver!”

  Karen. She didn’t have much time to process that information before he was picking her up by the waist and swinging her around.

  “Do you know what this means?” He plunked her down and placed his hands on either side of her face.

  “Ah…no?”

  “We’re out of here. She gets that transplant, everything goes well... I bought a house, Jane. Not just any house. I bought her a house in Hawaii,” he stated breathlessly with a bright expression on his face.

  “You did?”

  His hands were still on her cheeks.

  “Yeah, a while ago. Back before she got sick. She has no idea, Jane.”

  “Wow. That’s nice,” she muttered, a small reluctant smile formed on her lips. He was leaving? Why did that suddenly make her feel…what was that…? Sad? Lonely?

  “I just…I can’t believe it. Finally, after all these years. I’m so happy right now,” he stated before leaning in and kissing her quickly. On the lips. He pulled back, his smile faltering after a few moments before an intense look overtook his features and he practically drank her in with his eyes.

  Her breath escaped from her parted lips, her heart beating so hard, he almost had to hear it. There was no time to analyze anything before his lips were on hers again. Soft but demanding, his tongue met and caressed hers as his hands slid from her cheeks into her hair. As soon as her hands gripped his sides and wound their way to his back, his kiss deepened, becoming more urgent. One of his hands freed itself from her hair and traveled down her back, cupping her bottom and pressing it to his hard length. Her feet left the floor and they were moving as their mouths continued their frantic exploration. Her body was becoming heated; the flare most evident between her legs and that was just the start. Nerves and muscles joined in the party followed by flip flopping stomach and drumming pulse. Her mouth knew exactly what to do, how to match his rhythm and the effect was mind boggling.

  Why did we wait so long? This was so perfect. He was so incredibly good at this, demanding, but gentle, over the top hot and… did he just moan? It was affirmation of how much he was enjoying this too. Don’t think. This feels so good, don’t think and don’t ruin it. Her legs hit the bed and her body was laid down gently, his body never leaving hers. He tore his lips from her mouth, trailing hot, massaging kisses on her jawline, down her neck, his hand pulling the shirt away from her to reveal more skin and fasten somewhere near her collar bone. His other hand traveled up her side, slowly moving toward her breast before kneading it gently causing her to gasp in
pleasure and arch her back in automatic response. His thumb was stroking back and forth, causing even more havoc on her already crackling nerves. One of her hands ran up the side of his arm, feeling every muscle straining as he continued to touch her. In a moment, his lips were back on hers; his tongue diving back in as his hand left her breast and meandered down her torso, over her belly, past the waistband of her jeans and stopped.

  Keep going!

  Her legs spread automatically as an invitation and all thought centered on him touching her there. A small groan left her throat before his hand moved again, skimming over the zipper of her jeans, finally cupping her, gently squeezing and causing all manner of fireworks to go off from her core to every outlying part of her body. Joe. Her hips lifted toward his touch, urging him as her hands jammed into his hair. Joe. Something was building. He was till rubbing, squeezing, and the pleasure was absolutely maddening.

  “Joe,” she gasped out, her hands pressing his head to hers; she couldn’t get enough of his mouth.

  “God, Jane…” he groaned low in his throat after a particularly hot, wet kiss. His breath was warm on her ear; the distinct bulge of his erection was pushing against her leg. If she didn’t get these constricting clothes off soon…

  “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry…” he breathed into her ear. His hand stopped, in fact it had moved from her inseam to the side of her face. Sorry? Sorry for what?

  “That was…wrong,” he added, dousing her with another proverbial bucket of ice.

  “Huh?” she finally uttered as the warmth of his body left hers. He sat up, causing her to clamp her wanton legs closed. His hand pushed through his short hair and a sigh could be heard before she pushed herself up.

  “That wasn’t part of the plan. I didn’t mean…we need to get going,” he muttered as he pushed up from the bed and walked toward the door.

  “Are you all right?” he asked without looking at her.

  No! No I am not all right! What did I do? She practically screamed in her head. Her body refused to leave the bed, even after he grabbed the two bags and walked from the room.

  A feeling of dread settled over her. Obviously he was completely unmoved by the whole thing.