Hotbox

by Delia Delaney

  “I’m not sure,” I replied. “I guess it could be considered a weekend—especially since I don’t have practice either. Why, is there something you wanted to do?”

  She smiled. “Well… Can you stay for a while when we get to my house?”

  I would much rather be hit with another pitch than face her father again. “Uh, nah, probably not. I’m pretty dirty; I’d like to take a shower.”

  She nodded, like she already knew what my answer was going to be. But she surprised me when she said, “Then can I just stay the night with you?”

  I glanced at her with a smile, thinking that she was just joking. But based on her expression, I realized she was serious.

  “Uh, no,” I eventually answered.

  “Why not? My car won’t be there. There will be no evidence of my existence,” she smiled.

  I swallowed. “Uh, well, because your dad would tear down my door and haul me away.”

  She laughed, but I wasn’t even kidding. “Ty, I’m twenty-two years old. I’m not a teenage girl that he can ground. I won’t even be living in his house in another month; Cali and I have other plans. He’s just more opinionated than anything. He doesn’t exactly have any say in my choices.”

  I was not convinced. I’d bet that Joe Adams could make me disappear if he wanted to.

  “So you’re worried about my dad?” she asked.

  “Uh, yeah, a little.”

  She smiled and said, “So…if my dad weren’t a problem, you would say yes?”

  “Well, yeah. But I know how protective he is of you, and I don’t want there to be an issue.”

  “My dad’s out of town.”

  Oh, crap. “Jayden…”

  “You already said yes. Or did you just tell me that to shut me up?”

  “Yes- I mean, no.”

  She smiled, knowing she had me. “Then I want to spend more time with you.”

  As I approached a stoplight I sighed and looked at her closely. I had no idea why she was insisting so strongly. What did she have in mind? Especially with Aaron and Jesse in the house. I was confused, and before I did something really stupid, I decided I’d better talk to her about it first.

  “Tell me what your plans are then, so I don’t have to wonder.”

  “You mean state my intentions?” she chuckled.

  “Yes,” I smiled.

  “I just want you to hold me. Just like you did Saturday. You don’t have to do anything else.”

  I didn’t have to do anything else? The light turned green while I considered if it was possible for her to stay the night and nothing happen between us. I wasn’t really sure, but the idea of it kind of made me uncomfortable.

  “I had to defend your honor,” she said. “It’s the least you could do to pay me back.”

  It made me laugh. “What do you mean?”

  “He called you ‘trailer trash.’ I couldn’t let that slide.”

  “You clocked him because of me, not because of the stuff he said about you?”

  She scoffed. “I don’t care what people say about me, but they’d better not go after those I care about. My claws come out.”

  I laughed and shook my head. What was I going to do with her? I loved her so much; I didn’t want to be without her…

  She realized we were almost to my house and she smiled her satisfaction. When we got there, Jesse and Aaron weren’t even home yet. Jayden followed me to my room and laid herself across my bed while I headed for the shower. She was propped up on her elbow facing me when I came out a few minutes later, perusing through a Sports Illustrated.

  “How do you feel after your slide into home?” she asked, returning the magazine to the nightstand.

  I shrugged with a smile.

  “Do you hurt?”

  “Mmm, a little,” I replied, sitting on the bed next to her.

  “Oh, just a little?” she asked, sitting up and moving close to me. “I was feeling bad for you and planned on distracting you from your injuries.” She held my face and kissed me.

  “Mmm, actually you’re right,” I said, kissing her back. “I hurt pretty bad.”

  She stopped after a short while and moved behind me to rub my shoulders. I was glad because I was really unsure about kissing her while we were in my bedroom. After she asked about my thigh, where I had been pegged with the ball, I heard the front door shut and I assumed the guys were back. They must’ve gotten something to eat on the way home. I closed my eyes and enjoyed her touch and the pressure against my muscles.

  “Hey Ty, you hungry?” Jesse suddenly said at the door. “There’s extra chow mein.”

  “Uh, no I’m good. Thanks, though.”

  When he was gone Jayden said, “Lie down and I’ll massage your back a little better.”

  I didn’t argue and stretched across the bed on my stomach. She straddled over me and her hands returned. I was in heaven. I don’t think I’d ever had anyone massage my back before. She slid her hands up my shirt and it felt even better against my bare skin.

  “Do you do this often?” I murmured.

  She laughed and asked, “Why, does it seem like I do?”

  “Yes. But I’ve never actually had a massage before, so I don’t know what to compare it to.”

  “Seriously? I think you’ve been deprived.”

  “I’ve been deprived of you.”

  She softly laughed and continued with her work. After a while she moved to my arms and it felt just as good. Somehow we ended up kissing again, and because I’m a guy, you can probably assume what was going through my head at that moment. I had a beautiful girl in my bedroom, a girl that I loved, and I truly felt that we belonged together.

  “What happened to just holding you?” I asked quietly.

  She smiled and kept kissing me. “Well, isn’t that what you’re doing?”

  Yeah, my hands were all over her. I didn’t know what was going through her mind, but I could only see one ending to this and I wasn’t sure I wanted it to happen. Somehow, even through the years of my father’s corrupt example, I miraculously had a conscience. And even though he’d done nothing to guide me along a moral pathway, I knew that this kind of relationship with Jayden needed a little more time. My love and respect for her was too great, and I wasn’t about to ruin that for anything.

  I decided to just slow down first and see if that helped. It did, and she withdrew some of the intensity, and then after a few seconds, she separated herself from me. She smiled at me for a moment before finally moving to sit on the bed, but it didn’t change the fact that I still wanted to keep kissing her. What was I supposed to do?

  “I think I should take you home,” I said suddenly.

  She seemed a little surprised but said, “Okay, if that’s what you want.”

  I sat up and smiled at her. “It’s not what I want, but it’s what should happen.”

  “Okay.”

  Was she disappointed? I didn’t know, but I just couldn’t do this. Even though we had stopped, I was still afraid of crossing the line. I couldn’t handle it if I upset her, or spoiled her trust in me.

  “I really want you, Jayden—a little too much. I have a really hard time…resisting you. It’s very difficult when…”

  “I’m all over you?”

  I smiled. “It’s not just you. I shouldn’t even have you in here. I’m sorry.”

  She moved to the other side of the bed. “I’m sorry. I guess I got carried away. I’m not trying to— I just…” She sighed. “What if I just stayed over here?”

  I laughed, reaching over to pull myself closer. “You’re still an arm’s length away.” I kissed her a little more until I decided it really was best to take her home.

  “Can you take me to Cali’s, then? I don’t like being home when my dad’s gone.”

  That made me feel really bad, but I nodded and said, “Yeah, of course.”

  I led her down the hall, hoping that Aaron and Jesse had gone to bed. But they were both in the front room, watching TV. One look at Jayden
caused them to look at one another.

  “Oh, so that’s why you went to bed early,” Aaron said. “Hope you kiddies were safe.” I gave him a look but didn’t respond, and to Jesse he added, “Or maybe Miss High Maintenance doesn’t put out.”

  “Shut up, Aaron,” Jesse told him, and Aaron only laughed.

  Chapter Thirteen

  After the long weekend, things seemed to slow down a bit. But without baseball all day—and Jayden—I found myself a little lost. Finals were nearly over, and graduation would be taking place the next week. I spent more hours in Lou’s shop and he was glad to have me back. I was also glad to be immersed in work more than just a few hours a week. My place really was working on machines, just like my old man. When I was a teenager it was the only time I could actually spend with my dad, especially since it was the only time he was ever sober. But I really did like it, and as a kid it was more interesting for me to fix or build something than do anything else. I was a grease monkey, through and through.

  I didn’t really care what a degree in business could do for me. I guess it was a piece of paper that could be useful someday if I decided to open my own shop. Getting a degree was important to me, and I know I did learn quite a bit in the last couple of years, but none of it really helped me with what I liked. I just wanted to work on cars. Besides Lou’s, there were other businesses that I could easily get work from. For the past year Lou had already set me up with other jobs here and there as an extra hand, and working for larger companies was really good pay. One of those companies had offered me a permanent position, post-graduation, with very generous pay and full benefits. But it was over an hour away. Four weeks ago that wouldn’t have been a problem…

  It was hard to have time off with Jayden busy elsewhere. Tuesday we didn’t have practice. I saw her for a few minutes after work before she headed to teach, so I just hung out in the batting barn for a while with Jesse. Except for a few phone calls and short visits, I hardly saw much of Jayden, and it was quite a difference from all the time I’d spent with her over the weekend. It certainly made me miss her more, but it especially made me appreciate how much she had improved my life in just the past month.

  Thursday night she invited me over for dinner, and although I was looking forward to seeing her, I dreaded seeing her father. Luckily he wasn’t there for some of it, but my happy, relaxed mood changed when he came through the door at seven-thirty. He offered me a very neutral greeting—for sure just to appease his daughter—but he left us in the front room and watched TV in the den (with the door wide open). I was so thankful when Jayden suggested going for a walk.

  I tried for something a little different on Friday night. I took her to a very nice restaurant that overlooked the river. I almost dropped dead when she answered the door in a pale green, knee-length dress. Her hair was fully down and lightly curled, and she was wearing gold strappy heels. She had the most beautiful legs I had ever seen, and even though I’d seen her wear shorts, there was something different about seeing her dressed…like that.

  I gave her a kiss and said, “You look…wow. Is it rude to say you look hot?”

  She laughed and replied, “When it comes from you? No. So thank you.”

  I didn’t see her father anywhere, but I saw his car out in the driveway. I wondered why his eyes weren’t nearby to threaten me with fire.

  “Uh, is your dad around?”

  “He’s in the garage. He’s kind of his own little self-proclaimed mechanic.”

  “Oh, yeah? What’s he working on?”

  “Uh, probably the bikes. We’re going riding in the morning. He just likes to tinker on ‘em.”

  “The bikes? You mean motorcycles? You ride a motorcycle?” I was a little astounded.

  She smiled sheepishly and replied, “Yeah. I’m kind of a tomboy if you haven’t figured it out yet.”

  “Oh, no way, looking like that, you aren’t.”

  “What can I say? Clothes are the key.” She paused and tilted her head. “Did you want to talk to my dad?”

  “Oh, no, that’s okay.”

  “Well, let’s go say goodbye to him anyway and you can see what he’s working on.”

  “Uh, wait… Does he know what you’re wearing? Don’t you want to, uh, cover up a little?”

  She laughed, slid her hands behind my neck, and kissed me. “You’re funny,” she told me.

  I was being serious.

  “What’s wrong with what I’m wearing?” she asked, suddenly worried.

  I looked her over and smiled. “Nothing. You look amazing. I just thought… I don’t know. I don’t think I’d let my daughter go out looking so beautiful.”

  “Awww, you’re sweet. But if you have a daughter someday, you’d better just hope she dates someone as amazing as you. How beautiful she looks on a date might be the least of your worries,” she smiled.

  She did drag me into the garage to say goodbye to her father. I was hoping it was better to face him before we left instead of slipping off quietly without his knowledge. I was trying to be considerate of his feelings as a protective dad, but apparently it didn’t make a difference. He barely glanced up from the stool he was sitting on next to a pair of YZF 450’s.

  I did make a comment on the bikes and he offered a casual response. We talked shop for a few minutes, but only to make Jayden happy (and we both knew that).

  “Can you ride?” she asked me. “You seem to know your bikes.” She had an intriguing glimmer to her eyes.

  I smiled. “Yeah, I can ride.”

  “Off road?”

  “Sure, but I haven’t been for a while.”

  “We’ll have to go sometime,” she replied. She actually looked excited.

  Finally she announced our departure and I exhaled a silent sigh of relief.

  Her father offered a forced smile as he said, “Have a good time, sweetheart.”

  I actually realized that Jayden was right about the clothes comment. We had never really done much in a more formal environment; she was very adamant about doing things that were casual because that’s what she was used to. Sports bars, ball games, barbecues…those were all very much her thing.

  But seeing her in a different scene, somewhere quiet and a little more elegant, I could tell how classy she really was. I wasn’t refined in the least bit, and I was sure that I didn’t fit into this particular setting, but Jayden seemed to fit in it just fine. And the thing was, I knew she enjoyed it. I didn’t want to brag to myself, but I think doing something outside of our normal routine was a good choice.

  I danced with her for the first time ever. The last time I danced with a girl was probably in high school. The dance floor was dark and private, and it felt like it was just the two of us instead of the five other couples nearby. She seemed very happy, which made me very happy.

  Afterward we walked outside on the boardwalk along the river. We sat on a bench and faced the water. We were talking about things in general, but all I could think about was how much I loved her, and I was trying to muster the courage to tell her. But there were other voices in my head—her father, Chris, Aaron—telling me that I was an idiot. She definitely wasn’t high maintenance, but a girl like Jayden really did deserve only the best, and I had been convinced that I was not it.

  “Hey,” she said, putting her hand against my face. “What are you thinking?”

  I took a slow breath and answered, “Just…how amazing you are.” I gently took her hand and kissed it.

  “You’re thinking about how amazing I am and it caused your face to look so…troubled? I’m a little confused because when I think about you I’m happy. When I think about how amazing you are it makes me smile.”

  Hearing that felt good, but for some reason, my heart began to panic. I stood up and walked a few steps away, trying to give myself some time. She was watching me when I turned around to face her, and she looked worried.

  “Maybe that’s the problem,” I said softly. “Maybe you see me as something I’m just…not. Maybe he�
��s right; maybe you’re too good for me. Jayden, I can’t… Maybe I just don’t deserve you.”

  She didn’t say anything as she studied me from a distance. Finally she got up and stood in front of me, taking both of my hands in hers.

  “That’s a lot of ‘maybes,’ ” she said quietly. “If you can look me in the eyes and tell me that you don’t want to be with me anymore, I’ll walk away right now.”

  I closed my eyes and shook my head. “You know I can’t do that.”

  “Do you like being with me?”

  “Yes, more than anything.”

  “You care about me?”

  “More than I’m able to tell you.”

  She was completely still as she stared right into my eyes. Did I basically just tell her that I loved her?

  After a few seconds of silence she said, “If I feel the same way about you, then how is there a problem? Ty, if you tell me that Aaron is the cause of all this, I’m gonna go find him right now and beat that smug smile right off his face.”

  Her face was serious but I had to chuckle. “As much as I would love to see that, I think you should probably just steer clear of him.”

  “Is that really what’s going on? Is he spouting off all kinds of bull and you actually believe him?”

  Yeah, him, her father, Chris…

  “I am not too good for you,” she continued softly. “I can’t believe you even think that. Do you know how rare a guy like you is? I’m telling you… You are one in a million, and I can’t believe how blessed I am to have you. I don’t expect you to be perfect, and I certainly don’t expect you to unload all of your ‘issues’ within the first month of knowing me. I mean you can if you want to, but it’s not very practical. I realize you have some sort of challenge with your dad. But there’s nothing you could tell me about your father that’s going to make me think any less of you. I believe that you probably didn’t come from the best home growing up. It doesn’t matter, Ty. What matters is who you are in here—” she patted my chest “—and I think that person is incredible.” Her penetrating eyes softened a little, and she smiled somewhat shyly. “I’ve also heard that you might have…a history with girls. I’ve been warned about that.”