Full Circle Love (A Four Part Anthology of Cat & Zach Stories)

by Lori Leger

  “Oh, God! Get off of me!” She pushed at him, terror filling her. Her breath came in short, gasps, fast approaching the point of light-headed hyperventilation. “Please. Get off me. Now!”

  Her reaction shocked him at first—until the sound of panic in her voice triggered a memory. He’d heard that same tone over a decade ago when she’d called him in the early hours before dawn on a particular Sunday morning. She begged him to meet her outside his home. He had of course, because he couldn’t deny Cat anything she’d ever asked of him. He’d sat there with her, in her old Escort, held her as she’d cried, and finally coaxed the entire horrible story from her. She’d asked him to keep her secret, and he had. Again, because he could never deny Cat anything she asked of him.

  Horrified, and immediately sobered, he rolled off to the side. “I’m sorry, Cat. I’m so sorry.”

  Wild eyed, she pushed off from the bed, stood there shaking, sobbing, frozen in place. She attempted one step, but fell to her knees instead. Zac followed, dropping beside her to the rug at the foot of his bed. Gently, he took hold of her shoulders. “Cat, I’m so sorry.”

  He felt lower than low. How could he have forgotten? How could he have put her through that?

  “It-it’s not you, Zach—I know—I just—it all came back!”

  “I know. I’m so—so sorry. Please forgive me.”

  “You didn’t do anything.”

  He pulled her close, rocking her in his arms—kept rocking until her sobbing eased. “I did. I got drunk. I acted like an ass. But I swear I didn’t think anyone would call you. How would he know to call you?”

  “R-Rob c-called.”

  He closed his eyes. Rob. He was on his way to work in Texas. Of course he did. No matter. He couldn’t blame anyone else for this, nobody but his own, stupid self. “I’m sorry, Cat. I’m so sorry. What can I do to help?”

  “I-I don’t know. Nothing. N-nobody can do anything. Just leave me alone.” Her voice broke into an agonized sob on the last word.

  Hating himself even more, he stood, fought to steady himself as he pulled her up from her knees. “No way, sweet girl.” He threw back the quilt on his bed and helped her to remove her shoes and climb in. “Just rest now. I’ll be here watching over you.” He stood there, looking down at her, clueless as to what to do next.

  Sad brown eyes in a tear-streaked face looked up at him, cutting him to the quick. There she was, Cathryn, in his bed, in the house he’d built for her. In any other circumstances, he’d thought he’d died and gone to heaven. Now, he just felt sick inside.

  She reached out to him with one hand. “S-stay with m-me, Z-Zach.”

  There’s a choice he didn’t have to think on for long. He lowered himself cautiously beside her on the mattress and took her hand. “Sleep now, Cat.”

  Silently, she scooted away from the edge.

  Rather than taking it is an open invitation to join her, he wanted to be sure. “You want me to lay down beside you?” Her nod had him kicking off his boots to stretch out next to her, nearly overcome by the urge to show her he could be more than just a friend. Common sense told him his friendship was the only thing she needed now.

  Zach pulled her close, and she finally settled for laying her head on his chest. One arm wrapped around her shoulders, the other clutched in her two hands, he squeezed his eyes shut, aching with guilt. Even after telling him he didn’t do anything wrong, he knew better. He’d forced her into doing the one thing he’d vowed never to do.

  He’d made her remember.

  He lay there thinking, putting the pieces together. Just before becoming panicked, she’d wrinkled her nose, and then turned away from him. He suspected the combined odors of a bar room and whiskey on his breath had triggered the panic attack. Not to mention the weight of him on her, pinning her down—and that part, more than anything, made him want to empty the contents of his stomach.

  Once he knew she was sound asleep, he crept out of the bed, trying not to disturb her. He grabbed a set of clean clothes and slipped into his bathroom.

  Zach emerged several minutes later, freshly showered and rid of all traces of bar room and alcohol. He popped a few aspirins and downed a glass of water, before climbing back into bed with Cat.

  He stifled a groan of satisfaction when she turned to him in her sleep, curled one jeaned leg possessively around his. God almighty. If he could go to sleep like this every night of his life, he’d never want for another thing. He held her close, praying that one day she’d find a way to let go of the past and find the peace she deserved. He’d already doled out a little payback on her behalf—as much as he could without getting his own ass in a crack. He still remembered the satisfaction of beating the asshole unconscious. Even then, he’d wanted to do worse than that.

  When he finally fell asleep, it was deep and dreamless. Possibly the most restful night of sleep he’d had since before she’d left town.

  He woke up to an empty bed, an even emptier house, with no trace of Cat, other than a note next to the coffee pot.

  Zach,

  I helped you. You helped me. We’re even.

  Nothing has changed—I’m sorry.

  Cat

  He called her. She didn’t answer. A minute later she sent him a text: I’m okay. Really. No need to check up on me. Sorry if I scared you.

  He crumpled the note, shaking his head. The girl was stubborn—every damn bit as stubborn as she was beautiful. But if it was her stubbornness that also gave her strength, he figured he wouldn’t have it any other way.

  Chapter 5

  Now that Ellen and Gavin were officially a couple, they seemed to spend every waking moment together. At her mom’s urging, she, Kellie, and Brad all attended a crawfish boil/fish fry at Dr. Barton’s house on Good Friday. The home’s location on the north side of Lake Erin offered Cat hundreds of artistic with her camera. Huge, majestic oaks on land, paired with cypress trees surrounded by water, their great knees rising like stalagmites from below the murky lake waters.

  The afternoon turned out to be a blast, especially since Cat and Kellie were classmates of the good doctor’s son and daughter-in-law. The couple’s two adorable daughters, ages six and three, provided nonstop fun and entertainment throughout the afternoon. Cat’s camera snapped nonstop, catching dozens more candid moments of the children in comical and heart-touching action. Moments that would have faded to memories had Cat not been there with camera in hand to capture them forever, thrilling their parents.

  At one point Drew, Dr. Barton’s son, approached Cathryn, still beaming from the slideshow of his children he and his wife had just seen from Cat’s laptop.

  “Those shots are fantastic, Cat. How can we get our hands on them?”

  “I’ll submit them to a company that turns them into photo albums by tomorrow tonight. They won’t need much editing—your daughters are perfect subjects.”

  “If that’s a nice way of saying they’re gigantic hams, I’d have to agree with you. They both learned to say cheese and pose for the camera by the age of two.”

  Cathryn chuckled, glad to get a chance to catch up with an old friend. “That’s not such a bad thing. I remember hiding from cameras when I was their ages.”

  Drew sat down next to her. “Uh, speaking of hiding, Zach asked me to try and find out what the hell he did to piss you off.”

  Cat started to object but he raised his hand to stop her.

  “Hold on, now. The poor guy wanted me to trick it out of you, but seven years of marriage and being outnumbered by a houseful of women has taught me that a direct approach is usually the best way to handle things. He’s got a long way to go before he figures that out, but my wife insists he’s totally trainable.”

  Faced with such an unusual and refreshing statement from a married man, Cat couldn’t help but try her best to appease his curiosity.

  “Look, Drew. I work hard at my writing and my photography. I’ve chosen this path in life so I don’t have to sit at a desk all day in a stuffy office. I c
an write in my pajamas and I can snap pictures in jeans or shorts. I don’t need a man dictating to me when or where I can do either of those things.”

  Drew’s brow creased in confusion. “What makes you think he would do that? He’s proud as hell of everything you’ve accomplished. You should hear him brag about your photography, and he owns every book you’ve ever written.”

  Her jaw dropped. “Even the romance novels?”

  “Yep. Bought them all signed from the bookstore here in town. He said he’d ask you to personally autograph them for him one day.”

  She gave her head a slow shake. “He’s never mentioned that to me.”

  Drew’s left eye brown quirked suspiciously. “Cat, you’ve got to know how he feels about you.”

  “We’re best friends, Drew.”

  “Can it, Cathryn. The guy’s been in love with you for years. Everybody in school knew it.”

  She thought of all the near misses with Zach—or rather, the near kisses. At her front door—what if Rob hadn’t been in his truck? At the bayou, just before the phone call. What, if anything, would a kiss there have led to if they hadn’t been interrupted? Considering the location, possibly gator bait? She shook her head, thankful he hadn’t been able to complete the kiss.

  “I love him, too, Drew. I absolutely do, but you know how marriage changes people. He’s my best friend, and I don’t want to lose that. He wants a wife who’ll stay home and make babies for him. He doesn’t want a career woman who spends every minute of her day having conversations with fictional characters in her head or thinking about where to plan her next photo shoot.”

  “Seems to me you ought to ask him what he wants yourself. Hell, the guy has waited for you forever. You know, we were with him the night he heard about your engagement. He was crushed. He left our New Year’s Eve party at ten o’clock. Said he had a date with a bottle of whiskey and his bed. The least you could do is hear him out.”

  Cat tried not to think about their conversation the rest of the afternoon. That night, alone in her little home, she found herself returning to his words, again and again. He was crushed. Everything Drew told her verified Zach’s drunken confession almost a week earlier. Up until then I always thought you’d come home to me. And then later, when he’d said he’d built the home for her, for the two of them. How he couldn’t help himself because it was what he’d always wanted. How could she stay distant from a man like that? From the man who let her fall asleep in his arms after breaking down as she had?

  She pulled up Zach’s number, considered hitting her call button. What would she say to him? What could she say? Somehow, she sensed that one breach into that subject matter would create a ripple effect in their relationship. Lives would change, and the only thing Cat knew, for certain, was that good or bad, those changes would be instantaneous and life altering.

  He was right about one thing. She was a coward. And her cowardice nature won out as she threw her phone to the side without calling him.

  Sunday morning dawned clear and bright, brimming with promise. Cat met her family at early Easter church services then headed over to her mom’s to help with the meal.

  By eleven, Ellen’s house was bustling with activity. Reciprocating the invite from Good Friday, she’d insisted Dr. Barton, along with Drew’s family, come for a traditional Easter dinner. Once lunch was over, Ellen and her new man snuck into the back yard to hide eggs for the two children.

  Cat adjusted her camera settings, anxious to get more action shots of Gracie and Lilly, the two little girls. She looked up as her mother burst into the room, her cheeks pink from activity and excitement.

  Ellen clapped her hands. “This is going to be so much fun! Are you girls ready?”

  Gracie nodded excitedly and headed off on her own, swinging her basket in wild circles. Lilly jumped up and down shouting in her adorable lisp, “I find thum eggth!” She grabbed onto her mother’s hand and headed out into the back yard.

  Cathryn snapped pictures and laughed, and snapped more pictures, as Lilly squealed with excitement at finding several ‘eggth’. No matter how many times her mother told her to be gentle with the hard-boiled, hand-dyed eggs, the petite three-year-old would throw them forcefully into the basket with a resounding ‘crack’.

  Gracie proved to be a diligent egg finder, canvassing the yard one square foot at a time so as not to miss a single egg before going to the next patch of grass.

  Cat looked up as her mom approached, her eyes sparkling with anticipation. “Hey, you’re having a good time, aren’t you, Mom? Just think, this time next year, Kellie’s little one will be hunting eggs, too.”

  “I know, and I can’t wait! Sweetie, the prize egg is around that side of the house in a large tuft of clover. Why don’t you get a shot before Lilly gets her hands on it? It’s really lovely.”

  Cat frowned at her mother. “You never let us hide eggs on that side of the house. You were always afraid we’d trample your flowers.”

  Ellen waved off her comment. “That’s because the neighbor’s dog was always pooping in that part of the yard, don’t you remember? We don’t have to worry about that anymore.” She smiled at her daughter. “Now hurry and get a shot of that egg, would you?”

  Cat headed to the area her mother had indicated, saw the tuft of clover she’d mentioned. She approached, and gasped as she bent to examine the egg. No regular prize egg, this truly was a work of art.

  “Good Lord, we never got anything this nice,” she mumbled, parting the grass from the gorgeous gold and cobalt colored cloisonné egg. On closer inspection, she could see it held delicate metal hinges on one side. Unable to resist, she lifted it from its nest of clover, rearranged it and shot it from several different angles. Setting her camera down, she cradled the egg and opened it. A square of tissue with her name in neat print lay inside.

  Cat removed the paper, uncovering a smaller box, encased in deep blue velvet. She lifted it carefully and cracked it open, revealing a second small square of paper, tent-folded, with the words “Marry Me” written in neat print. The deep timbre of Zach’s voice startled her.

  “I knew you’d have to open that. You and closed boxes never did mesh well.”

  Cat spun around at his words. There he stood, looking as good as he ever had, in a pair of dark jeans, a white shirt, and a tan blazer. His eyes glittered with laughter, and the smile he gave her warmed her heart from the inside out. He took several steps toward her and stopped, raising his left hand.

  “Hang on a minute.” He pulled a tri-folded sheet of paper from his pocket. “I want to show you this agreement I drafted, before you say no.” He sidled up next to her and unfolded the paper. Zach cleared his throat before beginning to read. “This paper says that: I, Zachary Cade Ferguson, agree to allow Cathryn Jade McDaniel, upon her marriage to me, all the time she needs to pursue her dual career of writing and photography for as many years as she wants or needs.

  I also agree to pull my share of daddy duty should she agree to bless us with children as beautiful as she is. In the event that occurs, I will gladly, and without complaint, share in changing dirty diapers, both number one and number two, participate in pre-dawn feedings, rock colicky babies, treat boo-boos, wipe snotty noses, clean spit-up and vomit, both regular and projectile, as well as clean and sanitize after cases of diarrhea, both regular and explosive. I do, however, reserve the right to an occasional gag or barf during above-mentioned situations. In the occasion that any child of ours survives our incessant doting and spoiling, I also agree to share in both dropping off and picking up of said child or children to and from any, and all lessons and practices. This includes dance, gymnastics, tee-ball, baseball, softball, soccer, volleyball, football, basketball, chess, wrestling, swimming, water-polo, golf, synchronized swimming, track, singing, cheerleading, dance squad, piano, guitar, band, etcetera, etcetera, etcetera… ”

  “I also reserve the right to love you unconditionally until the end of our time together on this earth, and beyond that, if Go
d is willing. I will be your lover, your best friend, your ear to listen to your problems, your shoulder to cry on, your biggest and most boastful fan, and your cheering section.”

  He raised his hand to stop her from speaking and got down on one knee. Taking the box gently from her shaking hands, he carefully removed the tented paper, revealing a diamond solitaire engagement ring snuggled in a velvet cocoon. Zack removed the ring and continued. “All these things I promise if you will do me the honor of becoming my wife. I love you Cathryn Jade McDaniel. I have loved you since sixth grade, when you racked me during dodge ball. It was the apology that won me over. Do you remember? You said you sincerely hoped you hadn’t damaged my man parts, but that I should have been paying attention. And you were right. The truth is, I wasn’t paying attention because I was too busy falling in love with you. The simple fact is I’m no good without you, Cat-tasrophe. Will you please, please marry me?”

  Her mouth opened, closed, opened again as she uttered two words.

  “Synchronized swimming?”

  He cocked his head. “Cat, seriously? Out of everything I said that’s all you got out of it?”

  She grinned at the boy she’d always adored, the man she’d always loved, the friend she’d counted on for as long as she could remember. “I tell you what,” she said. “If you and I can agree here and now that no child of ours will either play water polo or be a synchronized swimmer, then I’ll marry you.”

  He pursed his lips and tried to look like he was considering it. “You realize, don’t you, that both of those sports take tremendous amounts of strength and stamina?”

  She sucked in her breath and grimaced. “I don’t doubt that at all, but they look ridiculous in those caps they make them wear, don’t you think?”

  He nodded, unable to hold back his laughter any longer. “You’ve got a valid point, Cat. You always do.” He stood straight and tall, towering over her. “You’ve got a deal, Babe. So will you marry me or not?”