SHIVER

by Tiffinie Helmer

  Raven gave Aidan a confused look before she gathered up the mugs and followed her sister to the counter to wrap them up.

  “At least you got a great sale out of taking him to the doctor.” Tern nudged her with an elbow. “More than covered your time and gas money.”

  Raven didn’t like it when she saw the total Tern had rung up. “Give him the friends and family discount for buying the set.”

  “Really?” Tern cocked a perfectly shaped brow. “You didn’t want to sell them to him in the first place.”

  “Make it right.”

  Tern sighed. “Fine. I really hate that good-girl streak of yours.” She prepared a new sales slip for Aidan. “Happy with that?”

  No. She wasn’t. She still had a problem with Aidan drinking tea from something she’d made. His mouth sipping from the rim she’d carefully molded, taking care to make sure it was smooth and comfortable against the lips.

  The bell on the door dinged as a customer entered the store. “Here—” Tern handed her the sales slip, “—get him to sign this, and I’ll finish wrapping his items.”

  Raven took Aidan’s credit card and the sales slip into the backroom. In her absence, he had proceeded to unpack the rest of the boxes. Her pottery was all lined up on the table. Pitchers, pie plates, casserole dishes, bowls, platters, mugs, and another tea pot. “What are you doing?”

  “You made all of these?” He looked at her, amazement reflected in his eyes.

  “Yes,” she slowly answered.

  “I’m impressed.” He raked a hand through his hair. Her eyes were caught on how the light reflected in the dark depths, highlighting a bit of red. He needed a haircut. “You are an amazing artist.” He glanced at her again. “Can I see your studio?”

  She caught her breath. Her studio was private. Yes, she gave lessons there, had students and family running through there all the time, but Aidan would see more than the others did. It would be like inviting him inside part of her soul.

  Tern bumped into Raven, saw the pottery unpacked on the table. “Oh, good. You brought the pie plates for Mrs. Norwick. She just came in, and she brought a friend.” Tern grabbed the pottery and returned to the sales floor, anticipating another sale.

  Raven heard oohs and ahhs from the other room, but the storeroom seemed to be closing in on her. Suddenly she was too hot. Yeah, she hadn’t taken off her coat, and it was warm in here, but that wasn’t why. It was Aidan. He was getting too close, asking too much, seeing too much.

  “I…uh…I’m going to get that last box.” She turned and rushed out of the room, through the gift shop, not stopping until she was outside at the back of the Suburban, where no one could see her. She fell against the door and unzipped her coat, letting the cold air slap her heated skin.

  But nothing seemed to slow the rapid beating of her heart.

  Aidan stood to follow Raven, but Tern entered the room.

  “You broke Raven’s heart when you left the last time.” Tern blocked the exit and planted her hands on her hips. “Are you going to do it again?”

  What? “She’s the one who told me to get lost.” He shook his head. “She broke my heart.”

  Tern advanced into the room. “She was hurting. You should have waited, given her time. You should have known better.”

  “Staying wouldn’t have helped anyone.”

  “She needed you, Aidan.”

  “I was the last person she needed or wanted to see then.” He raked a hand through his hair. “Your dad had been killed. She blamed me for it.”

  “She was hurting, she lashed out. People do that. They hurt the ones they love the most because those are the people who are supposed to stay and be able to take it. If you aren’t here to make amends, then make your trip short. Don’t let her care for you again. It almost killed her the last time.”

  Were they talking about the same woman? “She looks like she’s done just fine without me.” There were no signs that Raven had suffered. She had a loving family around her. A business that was thriving. She seemed happy.

  “Maybe outwardly it seems that way. But she doesn’t date. Ever. She works too hard, never vacations, never cuts loose like she used to. She’s different. A shell of who she once was.”

  “She’s matured.”

  Tern shook her head, her long hair flowing around her shoulders. “This is different. She’s old. Not mature. Grandma Coho acts younger than Raven.” She sighed and looked away for a second before stabbing him with her huntress stare. “If you hurt her again, I will come after you this time. I will make you suffer like no one has made you suffer before. Got that?”

  “Tern, the situation between us is really none of your business.”

  “Have you met my family? Of course it’s my business. That’s the way we work. You hurt her, you hurt all of us. And we defend those who would think to harm us.”

  “You done?” Raven demanded standing in the doorframe. Aidan wondered how long she had been listening. How much she’d heard. “Time to go, Aidan. I need to get back, and I still need to stop and get the things on Mom’s list.”

  Tern had buttoned up as soon as Raven had announced her presence, but the look she gave Aidan spoke volumes. “I plan on coming out for Sunday dinner,” she said.

  Aidan knew it was for his benefit. He’d been warned.

  “Fine,” Raven said. “I’ll let Mom know.” She turned and left the room. Tern and Aidan followed. “I left the other box on the counter since you and Aidan were in deep discussion over my life.”

  “Raven—”

  “You know, Tern, Aidan’s right. What’s between us needs to stay between us.” She tightened her lips and then continued, “I don’t need a keeper.”

  “I was just trying—”

  “I know what you were doing, but I don’t need my younger sister fighting my battles. I can do that myself just fine.” She glanced fleetingly at Aidan before returning her attention to Tern. “I love you, sis. But enabling me doesn’t do me any favors.”

  “Okay. But I don’t like it.” She directed that statement toward Aidan.

  “See you Sunday.” Raven left the shop.

  Aidan lagged behind her due to the damn boot strapped to his leg, and being careful of the package of teapot and mugs Tern silently handed him. “It was good to see you, Tern. I like your shop.”

  Then he left and hobbled toward the waiting Suburban. Raven already had the engine running. He got in, set down his purchase, and buckled his seatbelt. Raven was quiet as she backed up the rig and left the Arctic Tern.

  “Don’t do that again,” she said, her voice hard and tight.

  He didn’t pretend he didn’t know what she was talking about. “Tern’s quite your protector.”

  “I know.”

  “Why does she see herself that way?”

  Raven sighed and rubbed the back of her neck. “I had some rough years. She stepped in and straightened me out. Now she thinks she’s responsible for me, I guess.”

  “What kind of rough years?” Had he really broken her heart? Even though she’d been the one who demanded he left. Was Tern right? Had it been Raven lashing out because of the pain she felt over her father’s death? Maybe she didn’t blame him completely.

  “I don’t want to talk about it.”

  “One thing I’ve learned is that you don’t heal without talking about it.”

  She pulled into the parking lot of Fred Meyer’s, put the vehicle in park, killed the engine, and turned to look at him. Disbelief in her expression. “A man who wants to talk? Get real. I’m going to go and get what’s on Mom’s list. You stay here.”

  “I don’t want to stay here.”

  “Too bad. I want to hurry.” She glanced at his leg in the boot. “And you will slow me down.” She handed him the keys. “In case you get cold.” She opened the door and stepped onto the running board. “Don’t go anywhere.”

  She slammed the door and left. He watched her walk into the entrance of the grocery store. He didn’t like havin
g to stay in the car. He wasn’t a kid, or a dog. It was boring in the car. He looked around the parking lot. Mountains made of plowed snow were in the corners of the lot. Before break up, dump trucks would come and carry it all away to the river, far outside of town to help prevent flooding. For now, they were great places to climb and slide down, when the lot was empty. He remembered when he was young, coming to town and seeing kids do that. Not that he ever had. Earl hated town. Aidan hadn’t gotten here often as a child, unless his mother needed a booze run and he conned his way into going along.

  He rubbed his hands together, blew on his fingers, and noticed a Starbucks sign outside the building. Fred Meyer’s had a Starbucks? He didn’t have to think. He got out of the Suburban and made his way inside. He’d be back before Raven could get the many items on Fiona’s list. He’d get her a cup too. Maybe that would sweeten her up.

  Ever since he’d mentioned wanting to see her studio, she had shut down on him. No, that’s wrong. It went back to when he’d told her he’d missed her when they’d been at the overlook on Hagelbarger. He walked into the building, enveloped by a blast of heat. Starbucks was off to the right. The smell of ambrosia, and suddenly he missed Seattle. He ordered a Americano with double espresso and a Carmel Macchiato for Raven.

  He paid for the drinks, took a sip of his, almost burning his tongue in his haste, and savored the bold, rich espresso as it warmed him all the way down to his toes. Now this was more like it. He bought a bag of house blend to take with him. Who knew what he’d find at Earl’s place? Earl had been a fan of canned coffee. Bitter and lifeless. Much like the man.

  Aidan limped his way back to the Suburban and found Raven, her feathers ruffled, waiting outside with a cart.

  “I told you not to go anywhere.”

  He held up the coffee cups. “Starbucks.” He handed her the keys so that she could unlock the rig while he put the coffee in the cup holders and then went to help her unload. “You were faster than I thought you’d be.”

  “I told you I was in a hurry.”

  “Who would have suspected you could get a list of groceries faster than I could get a cup of coffee?” He helped load the last of the bags.

  Her lips twisted. “What did you get me?”

  “You? I got me two cups. It’s Starbucks. It isn’t like I can get my favorite cup of Joe in Chatanika.”

  “One of those cups had better be for me, or you’re going to have a long walk back to Chatanika.”

  He smiled. “I always thought you were the Caramel Macchiato with a pump of chocolate type. Is that okay?”

  She didn’t quite smile, but it was better than the frown she’d been sporting. “Sounds good.” She looked at him from under her lashes. “Thanks.”

  They climbed into the Suburban and headed back down Airport Way, past Lathrop High School where he and Raven had graduated. “Did you make the ten year reunion?” he asked.

  “Yeah, you didn’t miss much.” She glanced at him. “Same people doing the same stuff, just ten years older. You could have made it. They held it at the end of July. Isn’t fishing season over by then?”

  “You were glad I didn’t attend.”

  She was silent for a moment. “I was relieved, but I really didn’t think you would’ve made the effort.”

  He’d wanted to. If things had been different. He’d been wishing for different all his life. He changed the subject. “Could we swing into Big Ray’s? I need a warmer coat.”

  “As long as we make it fast.” She made the left hand turn on Cushman.

  “Why do you need to hurry?” He glanced at his watch. It was just after eleven. “Fox isn’t out of school for another three or four hours, right? Or is it because you don’t want to spend any more time with me than you have to?”

  She tightened her lips. “I have things to do.”

  What did she have to do? Pottery? Work at the lodge? Just how busy was her life? He wanted to know. “Like what?”

  She sent him an evil look. He threw his hands up. “I was just asking. Making conversation.”

  “You know that for the last three days I have done nothing but play nursemaid. My life has been on hold. I need to get back to it.”

  He gave up on conversation and looked out the window as they traveled down Cushman. She turned onto 2nd Avenue and pulled into Big Ray’s. He was glad to see it was still in business and that a big chain from the lower forty-eight hadn’t taken it over. “I’ll make this quick.” He opened the door and got out.

  She opened hers. “I should get a new pair of gloves for Fox.”

  They walked into the store together, but separated. He headed toward the large array of parkas, while Raven viewed the gloves and hats on the opposite side of the store.

  “Aidan Harte! As I live and breathe, I never thought to see you again.” A big bear of a man slapped him on the back, knocking the air out of him.

  Aidan looked up at him in confusion. “Uh…”

  “You don’t remember? I’ve grown a bit since the last time you saw me.” The man spread his skillet size hands. “Remember junior year, you saved my sorry ass from getting pummeled by Sam Sagoonick.”

  “Tiny Tom?” His brows rose in surprise. No way this…giant was Tiny.

  “Yup.” Tiny shrugged as though a little embarrassed. “I got a growth spurt after high school. People call me Thomas now.” He reached out a hand for Aidan to shake. “Good to see you, man.”

  “Yeah.” Aidan shook Thomas’ hand, his disappearing. “So, whatever happened to ‘Slay ’em Sam Sagoonick?”

  “I married her.” He grinned. “We’ve got three rug rats, girls, just as tough and beautiful as their mother.”

  “You married Sam?” Aidan didn’t know if he should pity him or respect him?

  “Yup.” Thomas grinned. “Never a dull moment with her around.” His smile turned grim. “Hey, man, I was sorry to hear about your old man. My condolences.”

  Aidan frowned. “Who told you about my dad?” Nobody in Chatanika had known Earl was dead, until he’d arrived. How had Tiny Tom known?

  “I’m not sure.” He scratched his head. “I was hanging with the boys the other night at the Lonely Lady. Someone was talking about it.”

  “Who?”

  “Sorry, man. I had a few too many.” He elbowed Aidan. “You know what I mean? I have no clue who told me.”

  “That’s all right.” Though it wasn’t. Who in Fairbanks would be talking about Earl?

  “What about you?” Thomas asked, obviously trying to change the subject. “Married? Kids?”

  “No and no.”

  “Too bad. A woman tempers a man. Makes life more enjoyable. You know what I mean?”

  He wished he did.

  “What’d you do to the leg? Break it skiing?”

  Raven came up to them, a pair of gloves in her hand. “Ready? Hi, Thomas.”

  “Hey, Raven. Wow, seeing the two of you together is like old times.” Thomas nodded. “How’s your boy?”

  Raven glanced from Aidan to Thomas and swallowed. “Good.”

  “He like those footpads for the dogs? They working out?”

  “Haven’t heard any complaints.”

  “Good. Good.” Thomas cocked his head to the side. “Hey, why don’t the two of you join me and Sam for dinner? It would be real great to catch up.”

  Raven’s skin blanched. Obviously, she didn’t like the idea.

  “Thanks, Thomas. We have to get back. Maybe some other time.” He grabbed a parka off the rack that was his size and looked at Raven. “Ready?”

  She nodded.

  “Well, let’s get you two checked out then.” Thomas stomped to the desk. A man that big didn’t merely walk.

  He rang them up. Aidan grabbed the gloves and put them on his ticket.

  “Hey,” Raven tried to object.

  “You drove me here, it’s the least I can do.” He could tell she wanted to argue but she kept her mouth shut in front of Thomas.

  “Seriously, man, it was g
reat to see you.” Thomas handed Aidan a bag with the items. “You staying long?”

  Aidan glanced at Raven and then back to Thomas. “Not sure yet, but I’ll stop in before I leave and catch up.”

  “You do that.” Thomas winked at them. “You two take care, now.”

  Raven turned and beat a trail out of Big Ray’s. Aidan hobbled behind her as fast as he could. His leg pulsed with pain as he reached the Suburban, Raven behind the wheel with the engine already running. He got in and before he had his seatbelt clicked, she was in reverse and backing out of the parking lot.

  “What’s up?” he asked, as she cut through town toward the Steese.

  “Nothing.”

  “Want to elaborate?”

  “No.”

  This wasn’t getting them anywhere. He decided not to push. He’d already done enough pushing today, and it was tiring. His head pounded in time to the pulsing in his leg. He needed to elevate it. Take it easy. The doc had been impressed with Eva’s skills. The x-rays had shown a hair-line fracture. And due to the type of wounds the teeth of the trap had made, a cast was out of the question. A boot was the next best option. And since it was only a stress fracture, the doctor had agreed to allow him to walk on it, but made Aidan promise to listen to the pain. If it got too bad, he should use the crutches. If that didn’t help, he was supposed to return. Right now, Aidan wanted to lay his seat back and elevate his leg on the dash. One of the pain pills the doc had given him wouldn’t be out of order either. But instead he sat there in a silent car, with a fuming woman, and a long drive over nasty roads. Once that was over, he got to look forward to moving into Earl’s. He couldn’t put out Fiona and Raven any longer.

  He must have dozed, because the next thing he knew, Raven was shaking him awake. He sat up in his seat and looked around. They were right outside the lodge.

  “Sorry.” He rubbed his face.

  “Where do you want me to take you? Earl’s? Or do you want to stay at the lodge tonight?” Raven didn’t seem as angry with him now as she had before.

  “Earl’s, if you don’t mind.”

  “You sure?”

  What was this? Just a little while ago she’d wanted to see the last of him. “The faster I get done what I came here to do the better for everyone.”