The Experiment

by HelenKay Dimon, Foreword by James Patterson

  “You’re not just a warm body or some pretty face. Hell, I’ve wanted you since the moment I met you.”

  Heat spiraled through her. “Okay, well, that’s clear.”

  “I’m trying to be honest here.”

  “What do you see when you look at me?” She really wanted to know.

  “Light. Energy.” He studied her and whatever look he saw on her face had him changing tactics. “You’re wary…yeah, I get that. But you also make me laugh. You don’t seem to take any shit, which is really sexy.”

  “The sudden spark of attraction between us took me by surprise.” Admitting that might be a mistake, but they were grown-ups. This was an adult mess and not one she could pretend away. “But I don’t want any part of it.”

  When she shifted away he moved to keep the same amount of distance between them.

  “Annie, do you know what else I see when I look at you?”

  “A woman stopping herself from doing something really stupid. Because that’s pretty much what’s happening.”

  “I fear I’m the ‘stupid’ in that sentence.”

  “I didn’t mean—”

  “I’m kidding.” He motioned to the couch next to him. “Please, sit just for a second.”

  As adults, they should be able to talk this through. Maybe even have a laugh about the confusion. She could at least give that a try. “Fine.”

  When he sat down on one end of the curved couch, she took the other end, putting as many cushions between them as she could.

  “I left this city in a hurry because I wanted to leave everything and everyone behind.” He shook his head. “Three thousand miles seemed like enough space.”

  “You don’t strike me as a runner. Not that type, anyway.”

  “Don’t be fooled by the suit and big job title. I couldn’t sprint away fast enough.”

  The emotional wall she’d tried to erect between them inched down. He wasn’t making a move. His thoughts came spilling out and she couldn’t help but feel a connection to him.

  He rested his elbows on his knees. “There’s so much I need to tell you.”

  She rushed to talk before he could add to the comment. “I like you, and that’s saying something because lawyers are not usually my favorite on the job.”

  He moved closer. “There’s something I need to tell you.”

  Ugh. “No, you don’t.”

  “You don’t understand—”

  “Whatever it is, don’t say it.” She stood up. Her nerve endings caught fire. She couldn’t sit still. Not right then. Not with her defenses down.

  “Please.” He stood up and met her right at the dead center of the couch. The need pulsed off him. He looked ready to reach out and touch her.

  The mental battle didn’t rage on for very long. This would be good-bye. She’d turn him over to Manda and get back to her life.

  She nodded because she didn’t dare speak. A second later his palms skimmed her cheeks and his mouth covered hers. The kiss, tentative and searching at first, lured her in. As she relaxed into him the kiss deepened, going from teasing to heated.

  “Okay, no.” She lifted her head. With a hand on his chest she pushed him away. Put a few inches of breathing room between them.

  “Really, Annie. You don’t understand.”

  Talking, touching…they were done with all of it. She pivoted around the end of the couch and headed for the door. “I need to go.”

  “Annie.” His voice grew louder.

  She knew he was following her, and that only made her walk faster. Anxiety bubbled up inside her, nearly swamping her, and she grabbed her bag. “Manda will call you. You’ll love her. Very friendly and a top agent.”

  “Jasper.”

  Annie’s hand froze on the door handle as she whipped around to face Dave. “What?”

  “I’m here because of Jasper.”

  Chapter 12

  Annie stood there with her bag hanging off her fingertips, trying to put the pieces and words together in her mind. Dave didn’t know Jasper…he couldn’t. “What did you just say?”

  “Jasper.”

  It sounded obscene to hear his name coming out of Dave’s mouth. It made her want to yell and shake him. “How do you know that name?”

  Dave visibly swallowed before answering. “I know him.”

  She could have sworn something clunked in her brain. She remembered that photo Jasper kept on his phone, the old one she’d seen one time when she scrolled through. Jasper hadn’t tried to hide it, but he didn’t show it off, either. It was of the guy who once meant something. The one Jasper loved and lost years ago, before he could accept the fact he was bisexual.

  They never talked about him except for that one time. The facts clicked together in her head now. But one piece didn’t fit. “Matthew. Jasper said his name was Matthew.”

  “David Matthew Hunter. At first I went by my middle name to avoid nepotism. My father’s a pretty well-known federal judge. He’s been short-listed for the Supreme Court by more than one administration.”

  The information made sense but it didn’t explain everything. He’d sought her out and used a fake name…or his real name. Either way, when he’d met her, he didn’t say who he was to Jasper and the huge role they played in each other’s past.

  A sick possibility hit her then. That Jasper, her loyal and loving boyfriend, set all of this up as some sort of sick test. “Did he send you to me?”

  Dave frowned. “What?”

  “Is this some kind of fidelity test?” She shifted until her back hit the door.

  “Are you kidding?”

  “Answer me.”

  “That doesn’t sound like Jasper.”

  How the hell would he know that? “He asked me to marry him and I didn’t give him an answer. Maybe…”

  All the blood rushed out of Dave’s face and his mouth dropped open. “He asked you to marry him?”

  He looked stunned and a little sick, as if the news punched into him. She recognized the look—the reeling. She knew and could identify the sensation because she was experiencing the same thing right now. The buzz in her brain. The dizziness. The conflicting needs to both sit down and race away bombarding her.

  “Tell me why you’re here. Why me?” Desperation clawed at her. She grabbed the door handle behind her back and tried to turn it but her fingers refused to work.

  “I just—I knew Jasper before. We were roommates. It was years ago. We—”

  Every buried bit of that conversation came rushing back to her. “You were way more than that to him.”

  “He told you?”

  Jasper had experimented over the years. He believed sexuality was much more fluid than many people liked to say despite the teachings of his very strict preacher father. When his feelings for Dave overwhelmed him, Jasper had panicked because loving Dave meant potentially losing everything.

  “He doesn’t lie to me.” He told her how he’d been confused and messed up, and that Dave cut off all contact and moved on. But Dave was here now and he’d kissed her…and she had no idea what any of it meant. “I don’t understand what’s going on.”

  “I came back to see him.”

  That part made sense. She really couldn’t blame Dave for wanting to rebuild whatever he had with Jasper. “You mean you moved to DC again to get him back.”

  Dave stepped closer. He had his hands out in front of him, talking with them, as if pleading with her. “I didn’t know about you, but then people—people we knew together back then—told me that he was with someone and it was serious. I did some research and—”

  The word sliced through her. “Research?”

  “Hell, Annie. I admit it. I wanted you to not matter to him.” Dave let out a sharp exhale. “But you do. Everyone was clear on that. So, I wanted to learn about you. I was curious and more than a little jealous.”

  She needed to get out of there. “Is this some sort of cruel joke? Are you trying to hurt me?”

  “God, no.” He shook his he
ad. “It’s the opposite. The more I learned, the more impressed I was. You built this career from scratch after your marriage fell apart, your job in finance went to shambles, and you lost your house.”

  “Oh, my God.” She took a step back. “None of that is your business.”

  “I know that. I do. I know my behavior has been—”

  “Shitty. Dishonest.” So many harsher words filled her mind.

  “I’ve been a dick. I should have told you who I was the first time you asked if we’d met before. But I was selfish. I just…”

  “You what?” She couldn’t possibly imagine what excuse he might use.

  “I grew to like you. I enjoy spending time with you. You’re beautiful and smart and resourceful, but above all you’re a survivor. There is nothing sexier than that.”

  Every sentence cut deeper into her. “What, so now you’re attracted to me?”

  “I’m attracted to you, and I miss him.” Dave closed his eyes. “Yeah, I know. It’s a mess.”

  The buzzing in her pocket made her gasp. For a second she didn’t even recognize it was her cell. When she grabbed it and stared at the screen she saw the name she loved so much. “This is work. I have to take it.”

  “Annie, please.”

  She cut Dave off by answering. She couldn’t press the button fast enough. “Hello?”

  “Miss Sullivan.” Jasper’s deep voice vibrated against her ear. “I need your services. Right now. You better be wearing something I can tunnel my hands under.”

  She didn’t want Dave to know who was on the other end. Not until she could figure out how to handle any of this.

  “Our appointment is still on for today. I’m at the Jefferson.” She pretended to look at her watch but the face blurred on her. “I’ll meet you in ten minutes, as planned.”

  “Block off the rest of the afternoon and evening. I intend to make you scream.” Excitement ran through Jasper’s voice.

  “I look forward to it.” She disconnected the call and pocketed the phone. “I need to go.”

  “We need to talk about this. Look, I know I messed up. I should have handled this better, been more open.” He blew out a harsh breath. “Jesus, Annie. This surprised me. You surprised me. How much I still want Jasper surprises me.”

  “I can’t do this. Not now.”

  Not ever.

  She turned and got a good grip on the door handle.

  “What are you going to say to Jasper?”

  She wished she knew. “I have no idea.”

  Chapter 13

  She somehow managed to stumble down the hall and get to the elevator. By the time she reached the lobby, her body shook and her muscles felt weak. She barely made it to the nearby bathroom and rushed into the stall. With the door locked she rested her head against the back and gulped in huge breaths.

  She put her palm against the wall and let the cool marble reenergize her. The last hour had been a mental train wreck. She didn’t rattle easily, but having Jasper’s past come back to haunt their future messed with her in ways she’d never experienced.

  She lost track of time as she waited there, bringing her panicked breathing back under control. She needed to get herself together. Needed to meet Jasper…figure out what the hell to tell him.

  After splashing water on her face, she stepped out of the bathroom and headed for the hotel entry. The door opened and fresh air rushed at her. The warm sunshine beat down on her. She glanced to her left and saw a familiar swagger. A familiar face.

  “Miss Sullivan. You’re late.” Jasper came down the sidewalk and stopped in front of her before leaning in for a quick kiss. “You weren’t getting to me fast enough so I’m here to—”

  She launched her body against his, falling against his chest and sighing in relief when his strong arms came around her.

  “Hey.” His fingers slipped into her hair. “You okay?”

  “Rough day.” That didn’t come close to describing it.

  “That sucks.”

  “Yeah, it does.”

  “You know what you need?” He whispered the question into her ear.

  She looked up to see the smile she could hear in his voice. “Tell me.”

  “One of those ridiculous baths you like, complete with bubbles and candles.”

  She could almost feel the heat of the water against her skin. “Yes.”

  He pressed a kiss against her forehead. “Followed by pizza and a movie marathon on the couch.”

  He always knew the right thing to do to make her feel better. Tonight she didn’t need hot sex. She needed a different kind of comfort. “Action movies?”

  He snorted. “As if I’d suggest anything else.”

  She snuggled in closer. “Take me home.”

  Chapter 14

  Annie didn’t even bother to knock when she got to Manda’s office door the next morning. She heard her friend hang up the phone as she pushed right in, dropping into the chair in front of Manda’s desk. “My life is a mess.”

  “And good morning to you.” Manda saluted Annie with the coffee mug before taking a sip and setting it down next to her keyboard.

  “Dave knows Jasper.”

  There. She said it. All last night she’d thought it. The truth hovered on her tongue while Jasper drew her bath last night. While he took care of dinner and then the dishes. Even after hours of mindless television, when he tucked her into bed and wrapped his arms around her.

  She’d wanted to spill every detail about Dave and her unexpected attraction and stabbing pain she felt when she thought that Jasper might wish he’d made other relationship choices. Twice she started to say something, but the words had refused to come out. She’d sat there sputtering, trying to cover up her confusion with fake coughs.

  Manda frowned at Annie. “What?”

  “They used to live together.”

  “Wait, back up.” Manda shook her head. She was not someone who got confused easily, but she looked completely stumped. “You’re saying your new crush and your hot boyfriend are friends.”

  That wasn’t even close to what she was saying.

  Annie glanced over and noticed the door stood open a few inches. Rather than get up, she leaned in and lowered her voice. “More than that.”

  “Whoa.” Despite the spiky black heels, Manda made it out of her chair and around the desk in less than two seconds to shut the door. Her eyes practically gleamed when she sat back down again. “Talk.”

  This wasn’t her story to tell, but Annie knew she was going to spew every last syllable. She had to talk through the facts with someone. Maybe that would help her make sense out of what happened.

  “They had a thing.” Just saying the words made an image pop into her head.

  One night months ago, they’d talked about the things they’d done with other people. Jasper was not the type who got jealous. In fact, he insisted on hearing every detail, including the ones about her college fling with a fifty-year-old professor and all the places they had sex around campus.

  Then he told her about Matthew, who she now knew was Dave. They’d known each other since college and had been roommates. They’d gotten each other off with their hands and mouths. One night it had gone further. One snowy night, when the DC roads and highways had been shut down for days.

  That’s the night that played in her head. She made up the details without any trouble. The thought of Jasper dropping to his knees in front of Dave in one of his expensive suits…a new wave of heat hit her. She felt it burn in her cheeks. And not from embarrassment. No, the idea of them together excited her.

  “A thing thing?” Manda sounded both stunned and a little excited herself.

  “I’ll pretend I know what that means—yes.”

  Manda leaned back in her chair, letting it rock back and forth a few times as she studied Annie. “Damn, Jasper just got hotter. I didn’t think that was possible.”

  They’d talked about this before. The tattoos and that fancy degree. The mix of the fuck-you attitude an
d would-rescue-a-kitten charm. He was sweet and self-assured and on fire in bed.

  But none of that information was relevant right now. “Could you focus and help me here?”

  “What’s the problem? It’s simple.” Manda ticked off her points on her fingers. “You love Jasper. You both love sex. Jasper and this Dave dude had a thing, which I would like photos of, by the way. And you want a thing with Dave but don’t want to lose Jasper.”

  It sounded even worse spelled out like that. Annie sank down in her chair and counted all the ways she’d screwed up this situation. “Do you know the definition of the word ‘simple’? This is the perfect opportunity for you.” Manda folded her hands in front of her, looking far too satisfied.

  Annie almost hated to ask. “For…?”

  “A threesome.”

  The word clunked around in Annie’s head. Yeah, no way. She stood up. “Okay, we’re done here.”

  “Sit.” Manda used her best high school teacher voice. “I’m serious.”

  When it came to sex and relationships, Manda was open and giving. She thought the idea of one-person-forever was outdated and people should do what felt good and right for them. Screw society’s traditional roles and rules.

  It all sounded good in theory, but Annie’s history kept tugging at her. For all her frustration with her parents’ choices, Annie wanted to believe in the one. She just feared that finding that person meant the death of her sex drive, which was why she was so afraid of Jasper filling that role. She was not ready to trade passion for love just yet.

  “I don’t want to cheat on Jasper.”

  “It’s not cheating if he’s an active participant.” When Annie didn’t say anything, Manda sighed and kept talking. “You know how this works, right? You all agree. You all enjoy. That’s the understanding, the one you come to through honest communication.”

  Annie couldn’t believe those arrangements worked smoothly in real life. Emotions would get in the way. Guilt and mistrust. Then there was the three-person dynamic. One poor sap always got left out, and she sure as hell didn’t want that to be her.

  Still, she didn’t hate the idea. Being in bed with both of them. Sitting on the couch with both of them, teasing in that fun relationship kind of way. She could almost see it. But…