The Art of Wag

by Susan C. Daffron

  “I’m not sure you have a case, darlin’. You just turned down the only lawyer in Alpine Grove.”

  Tracy grimaced. “Good point. I don’t want to talk about that anymore. Let’s talk about my trip. It’s still okay if I stay with you, right? I really gotta get out of this town.”

  “What are you going to do about Roxy? You know she can’t stay with me. Billy Bob is just too much cat for her to handle.” Shelby’s cat Billy Bob outweighed Roxy by probably twelve pounds. The giant feline spent a lot of time sitting on the sofa cleaning his ample gut and he didn’t like a nosy dachshund interrupting his personal time.

  “I know. I talked to Dr. Cassidy about the days off, but I forgot to ask about Roxy. Maybe she’ll have some ideas.”

  “On the bright side, at least you don’t have to worry about Jerry now.”

  “Yeah, although I don’t want to talk to my parents about my rent again. I’m really not up for another lecture from my dad about how I’m not responsible. I told you about the whole incident that happened with Roxy the last time she stayed at my parents place, so we all know she can’t stay at there again. That was a mistake. Dr. Cassidy banished Roxy from the vet clinic too. After being there as a patient, Roxy took issue with staying there. It was bad. But maybe Dr. C knows someone.” Roxy’s reputation as a troublemaker was spreading. It was getting seriously depressing.

  Shelby said cheerfully, “You’ll get it figured out. You always do. I’m looking forward to seeing you. It’s been too long! Maybe we can study together after your class.”

  “Oh boy, that just sounds like a whirlwind of fun. But I don’t think it would work. The class I’m taking is about art software and I doubt you’d have it on your computer, unless you suddenly decided to chuck that whole idea of getting your PhD in Comparative Literature. Do you have any coloring books? I could play with Crayolas while you work on your dissertation.”

  “I suppose I could take a night off from it.” Shelby sighed. “Just one night wouldn’t hurt.”

  Tracy methodically chipped at a piece of desiccated cereal on the bedspread, placing the crumbly pieces in a pile on the coffee table. “I’d love to go out someplace where I don’t recognize every single person I meet. Being anonymous in a large city is underrated. You can miss one night of study. I promise I won’t corrupt you with my idle ways.”

  Shelby laughed. “If you couldn’t corrupt me in college, it’s way too late now.”

  The next morning, the alarm went off promptly at six o’clock. With a groan, Tracy rolled over in bed and whapped the snooze button. It had been a long night after Roxy decided to emerge from her hiding place at two in the morning. The dog had crashed out of the kitchen cabinet with a yelp, clanking the pots and pans all over the kitchen. Worried that the dog might have hurt herself, Tracy hauled herself up to investigate. Roxy was fine, but then Tracy couldn’t get back to sleep. The financial implications of losing the restaurant job swirled around in her sleep-deprived brain. What was she going to do? Leaving town for this class was stupid, since gas cost money. She should start asking around town for employment possibilities. But she really wanted this weekend away.

  After several more arguments with the snooze alarm, Tracy finally dragged herself out of bed, fed and walked Roxy, and actually made it into the vet clinic on time.

  Dr. Cassidy looked up from the chart she was holding and appraised Tracy’s unkempt appearance. “What happened to you?”

  “My dog has a really irritating sense of humor. I thought she killed herself getting out of her latest hidey-hole. Then I couldn’t sleep and I didn’t have time for a shower. I figure the dogs will just find me more interesting this way.”

  The veterinarian pulled a file from the cabinet. “That’s probably true. Maybe you could comb your hair before the clients come in, though.”

  Tracy reached up and tried to run her fingers through her hair. Yikes. “Sorry about that. I ran out of the apartment before I looked in the mirror.” She walked into to the bathroom to try to do something about her appearance. She looked at herself in the tiny mirror. It was like Buffy the Vampire Slayer had gotten herself chomped. The undead look was decidedly unattractive.

  After the morning rush of clients had dropped off their animals for surgery, Tracy stood next to the vet as she worked to drain a large abscess on a cat’s neck. Tracy stuck out her tongue and made a face. “That’s nasty.”

  “I know. Sorry. It’s not like this is Tigger’s first abscess either.”

  Tracy averted her eyes, opting to study the gauges on the anesthesia machine instead. “I know I asked you about getting the weekend off, but I was wondering if there’s any way Roxy could stay here.”

  “No. You know that didn’t work out well. We talked about that.”

  “I know.” Tracy sighed. “It’s just that I really want to get out of town. Do you know anyone who might be able to take her? It’s only for two days. She can’t come with me. My friend Shelby’s cat and Roxy have issues.”

  “Roxy has a lot of issues. Could you grab a needle?”

  “I know. But I love her.” Tracy peeled open a sterile needle package so the vet could grab the needle with her gloved hand. “I can’t just leave Roxy in my apartment.”

  The vet shook her head. “Well, maybe the boarding place could take her. Remember Kat Stevens?”

  “Oh yeah. She has the huge dog that barfed all over you.” That had been quite a memorable performance.

  “Yes. That’s her. I heard she’s opening a boarding kennel.”

  “That’s great! I’ll get her name from the file and give her a call.”

  Kat sounded nice on the phone and was remarkably amenable to taking Roxy on such short notice, as long as it was okay that the dog stayed in the house. Tracy agreed to drop off Roxy in the afternoon, so she could still make it to Shelby’s place that night.

  After work, Tracy loaded Roxy and her crate into the car, which was an ancient brown Subaru station wagon that her father referred to as “The Turd.” The story was that it had been used by commune members in the mid-seventies until the car died an ignoble death in a pasture and was left to rot.

  Tracy’s parents almost never talked about their years living in the Alpine Grove commune, but Tracy remembered the hippie life fondly. When she was a little kid, she had spent a lot of time outside and there had always been someone to play with. It had been fun, but she never told anyone now that her hippie name was Rainbow. And yet, every once in a while, she met someone who remembered. In a small town, there were no secrets. People knew everything.

  When she was in high school, she had convinced her father to let her boyfriend Neil drag The Turd out of the pasture, and give him a shot at getting the car to run again. Although Neil wasn’t the greatest boyfriend for a number of reasons, he was a fairly decent mechanic. Through a complicated negotiation with the DMV, she was able to get a title on the formerly junked vehicle, and she’d been driving it ever since. The Turd made a lot of noise and sometimes opted not to run at all, but she never had to worry about anyone stealing it.

  Tracy nosed the ancient car down the winding gravel driveway toward Kat’s house, cautiously picking her way around the deepest holes, since the car still had a long journey ahead of it tonight. Roxy was looking annoyed at all the bumps and barked a few times to express her displeasure.

  “Sorry Roxy. We’re almost there. You have to be good while I’m gone. Kat is being really nice about taking you today. I hope this works out. Please, please be good.”

  Roxy just looked out the window at the passing pine trees, ostensibly immune to the pleas for good behavior.

  Tracy pulled the car under a tree and cut the engine. The car coughed out a final burst of exhaust before quivering into silence. A huge hairy brown dog ran from behind the house, skidded to stop by the old car, and began sniffing the tires as Tracy got out. “Hi Linus. Do you remember me?”

  The big dog wagged his tail at the friendly visitor and was soon joined by a small black-and
-white border collie. Tracy bent to pet the dogs and noticed the sound of a chain saw whining somewhere in the distance. Fall had definitely arrived, so it must be time to get the wood in. Out here in the middle of the forest finding firewood certainly wouldn’t be an issue. The front door of the house opened and a petite woman with long, wavy brown hair started down the front steps.

  Tracy waved. “Hi, Kat. It’s good to see Linus looking so healthy. Who is the border collie?”

  “That’s Lori. Two other dogs, Tessa and Chelsey, are in the house and Lady is out in the woods with Joel somewhere.”

  “Is he the one making all the noise?”

  “Yes. He finished fixing the roof of the house. Now he’s working on the firewood program, so we don’t freeze this winter.”

  Tracy smiled. “Yes, him and everyone else. It’s like they say—-there are two seasons: winter and getting ready for winter.”

  “I haven’t experienced winter yet. I’m not sure I’m up for chopping firewood. But Joel doesn’t seem to mind, so I’m going with it. Where’s Roxy?”

  Tracy turned toward the car. “She’s in there. Let me get her out. She’s only got three legs, so it’s better if I don’t let her try and get out herself.”

  Kat nodded and stroked Linus’s head slowly as Tracy extracted Roxy from the car. Linus leaned on Kat in an effort to soak up as much affection as possible. She looked down at the dog. “Listen, Big Guy, you’re going to knock me over. Cut that out.”

  Tracy put Roxy on the ground and the little dog started barking furiously at Linus, who looked distressed at the outburst. “Roxy, no! Quiet!”

  Roxy started marching off toward the forest until she reached the end of her leash, and turned to glare at Tracy. Kat said, “Maybe we should take her for a little walk to help her get acclimated?”

  “Yes. Roxy tends to be a bit opinionated. Also, I know I told you about this on the phone, but don’t forget about her hiding thing. I’m not sure if she’ll do it here at your place, but she thinks she’s really funny. Hiding in my pots and pans cabinet is getting old.

  Kat nodded. “I’ll keep that in mind.”

  Roxy started barking again and was practically levitating in her state of hysteria, yanking at the leash. A tall man wearing bright orange chaps and a hard hat emerged from a break in the forest. He was carrying a large orange chain saw. A brown-and-black collie mix walked by his side. Seeing the dachshund, the dog ran ahead to say ‘hi.’

  All of the dogs circled and sniffed each other in an elaborate, complicated greeting ritual. Roxy allowed herself to be sniffed, yipping occasionally at any impolite transgressions. The man removed his hard hat and waved. “Hi Tracy. I guess that’s Roxy?”

  Tracy waved back. “Hi Joel. Nice chaps.”

  “Kevlar. It’s not just for bulletproof vests anymore. I’m fond of my legs.”

  Kat grinned. “So am I. And I’ve watched way too many chain-saw-massacre movies. So I’m all for Kevlar everything.”

  Joel waved toward the house “I’m covered with sawdust and wood chips, so I’m going to go take a shower. It was nice seeing you again, Tracy.”

  As he walked away, Tracy turned to Kat. “Wow, he sure looks different.”

  Kat turned to look back at Joel’s retreating form. “What do you mean? He looks the same to me.”

  “He’s going native, isn’t he?” Tracy nodded. “Yeah, this happens when men stay in Alpine Grove too long. They get hairier. Then they start losing teeth.”

  “Eww. His teeth are fine. But I suppose he does need a haircut. I kinda like the longer hair, though.”

  “Is he growing a beard? When was the last time he shaved?”

  “I’m not sure. Maybe a couple weeks ago. At least it’s past the scuzzy stage. I’m trying to remain open-minded, but I told him if he starts looking like any one of the members of ZZ Top, we have a problem.”

  Tracy shook her head. “It’s a slippery slope. The last time I saw him, he was gorgeous. Like every other woman in this town, I had a huge crush on him. But then he had the super-model girlfriend.” Seeing the look on Kat’s face, Tracy cringed inwardly. Shelby was right. She needed to learn to shut up once in a while.

  Kat looked down at Roxy. “Um, well, that’s been over for some time.”

  “Roxy, stop that.” Tracy pulled back on the leash. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to bring that up. But everyone was hoping that girlfriend would get lost. It’s a big event when a good-looking guy arrives in town. There was a long line of women wanting to date him.”

  Kat looked up and smiled slightly. “I think I cut in line.”

  “Yeah, well, I’m sure they’ll back off. He’s going native now.”

  “I guess that’s good news for me, since I’d prefer that he stay right here.”

  After Tracy left, Kat carried Roxy up the steps into the house. She put the dog down on the floor and Roxy ran around her legs, effectively hog-tying her. Kat bent to disentangle herself from the leash. “Okay Roxy. This is the house. I’ve heard about your wily ways and I’m going to stay leashed to you for a while, so you can learn where everything is.”

  Roxy glared at Kat and then charged toward the living room. “Okay. So you want to see what the sofa is like? I wouldn’t mind going back to my novel. It was just getting good.”

  Kat sat down on the sofa and lifted Roxy up to join her. Like most small dogs, Roxy was used to being picked up and carried around. She seemed to view humans as large servants, ready to do her bidding. Clearly worn out from the excitement of the drive, she turned around a few times and curled up next to Kat to settle in for her afternoon nap.

  Joel emerged from the bathroom wearing a towel around his waist, and Kat looked up to admire the view as he walked to the bedroom. Spending time out in the forest chopping wood certainly was doing marvelous things to his shoulder muscles, which already were mighty fine. She picked up Roxy and placed her back on the floor.

  The dog started motoring back toward the kitchen. Kat tugged on the leash. “Nope. We’re going to go see what the half-naked man is up to.”

  She leaned in the doorway of the bedroom and watched as Joel yanked a t-shirt over his head. He tugged the shirt down over his stomach and looked over at her. “Something wrong?”

  “Did you brush your teeth?”

  Joel grinned, emphatically flashing his pearly whites at her. “Yes. What has prompted your concern for my dental hygiene all of a sudden?”

  “Tracy says you’re going native.”

  “What?”

  “She says that men who live in Alpine Grove too long get hairier and lose their teeth. It’s no big deal if you don’t want to get a haircut, but the toothless thing is definitely not sexy.” Kat had seen enough Alpine Grove men to know that some of them weren’t making dental care a priority. Tracy was definitely not wrong about that.

  Joel laughed. “I’ll keep that in mind. Tracy has lived here her whole life, so she should know.”

  Kat walked over to him, pulling Roxy behind her. She looped the leash over her arm and ran her hand under his shirt and up his chest, spreading her fingers across his muscles and enjoying the feel of his skin. “Would you be willing to bring in Roxy’s crate? It’s at the bottom of the front steps.”

  “You seem to be attached to that dog. Literally.”

  Kat wrapped her arms around Joel’s waist, leaned her head against his chest, and looked down at Roxy. “I’m trying to keep her close, so she doesn’t disappear. Tracy says Roxy thinks hiding is funny. I’m not amused by that sort of thing, particularly after the last dog we had here kept escaping. And Roxy is so tiny that I might never find her again. What if she got hurt? She’s already only got three legs.”

  “Okay. But you’ll have to let go of me first.”

  Kat looked up into his face. “You feel good. Maybe I could put the dog in her crate for her nap. Then I would be free to do other things.”

  He bent to kiss her. “Will I like these things?”

  “I’m pretty su
re you will.”

  Later, Kat was lying snuggled next to Joel with her head resting below his collarbone. She stroked his forearm absently. Now that he was in a good mood, she should get this conversation over with. “So um, my mother called today.”

  Joel opened his eyes and stared at the ceiling. “Uh-oh.”

  “She was nicer than usual; it was sort of strange. Maybe something is going on…I think she wants to visit. But I haven’t, um, exactly mentioned that you’re living here. I didn’t suggest that she come up here, but it seemed like she was angling for an invitation.”

  Joel rolled over to look at Kat. “I thought she hated the fact that you live in Alpine Grove. She wants you to move back to the city and get a real job, right?”

  “That was when she was trying to keep my family ancestry a secret. Now that everyone knows the whole complicated story about how I was adopted, I think she doesn’t care that I live here anymore. Maybe she’s curious to see the house again…I have no idea.” The workings of her mother’s mind were a mystery to just about everyone, particularly Kat.

  He tilted his head. “Do you want to see her?”

  “I’m not sure. She’s my mother. But as you know, we don’t exactly get along. And I think that the level of dirt and dog hair here might send her into some sort of neat-freak apoplectic seizure. She’s really not good with dust. Or my boyfriends. At least the past ones, anyway.” That was an understatement.

  Joel sat up and rearranged the pillows. He gripped the back of his neck with his hand and leaned back. “Your family has a long history of secrecy. Am I now one of those secrets?”

  “No. Well, not really, anyway. I just try to avoid discussing my personal life with my mother, since it usually doesn’t end well. But it’s going to be pretty obvious I’m not alone here if she shows up.”

  “I’m not sure what you’re saying here. Do you want me to move out?”

  Kat’s heart skipped in her chest. “What? No. Definitely not.” Could she possibly screw up this conversation any more than she already had?