The Art of Wag

by Susan C. Daffron

  Tracy glanced at him. He was clutching the strap of the backpack with both hands and looking down at the grass as he walked. She said, “I don’t live around here. And I have a job.” Sadly, it was just one job now. At least she still had one source of income left, so she wasn’t completely unemployed and destitute yet.

  Rob kicked a rock with his sneaker, causing it to skitter across the sidewalk. “Where do you live?”

  “Alpine Grove. It’s a little town.”

  “Oh, I know it. That’s perfect. It’s not that far away. Couldn’t you come back here for the meeting?”

  Tracy gripped the handle of her bag more tightly. “I have to work. And at the risk of sounding like I’m financially challenged, I can’t skip out on work again, because I need the money. I can’t take any more time off. My boss will kill me.” Financially challenged was a far more pleasant way to say she was totally broke and almost homeless.

  “I’d just need you for this meeting. Whether or not I get the contract, you’re off the hook. If I get it, I’ll have money to hire a freelancer to actually do the work.”

  Tracy stopped in front of the deli and turned to face him. “Is this something unethical? Or illegal? Because I don’t want any part of it, if that’s the case.”

  Rob opened the door for her. “No, not really. Well, maybe it’s a little deceitful to imply that you’d be doing the design later, I guess. But that happens all the time with this type of contract. People hire freelancers that come and go. You said you don’t do that type of work anyway, right? But I know you can talk about color theory and contrast and all that artsy stuff. All you have to do is pretend to be an artist for one meeting. It will be great!”

  Tracy was busy rummaging in her purse for her two dollars, but paused to look at him. “Great is definitely not the first word that comes to mind here.”

  They got their coffee and carried it to a table. Tracy sat down and encircled the mug with her hands. “So why should I do this? I don’t even know you.”

  “I’ll pay you. How about $500?”

  Tracy gripped the mug more tightly. That would pay her rent and then some. She could buy something other than fire-sale bulk boxes of ramen noodles at the grocery store. “Um. Well, that makes it more interesting. I’d need to talk to some people first. But I still don’t know anything about you.”

  “What do you want to know?”

  Tracy stirred some sugar into her coffee. “I don’t know. What is your shoe size?”

  He took a sip of coffee. “Really? That’s the best you can do? Thirteen.”

  She peered under the table. “Those are some big feet!” He had large hands too. Was it true what they said about that? Hmm. “Okay. Are you afraid of the dark?”

  “No. Are you?”

  Tracy shook her finger at him. “Hey, I’m asking the questions here. It depends on where I am. If I were in an old cemetery in a scary neighborhood with alien neon werewolves creeping around, then yes. But if I’m walking around downtown Alpine Grove, no.”

  “Anything else? How are my shoe size and neon werewolves related to the meeting?”

  “Fine. Where did you grow up?”

  “A galaxy far, far away.”

  Tracy scowled. “Oh, come on. That’s not helpful. How am I supposed to know you’re not some creepy serial killer or something?”

  Rob waved his hands in front of himself. “Do I look like a serial killer to you?”

  “Not really, but serial killers never do, right? And if you were one, would you tell me?”

  “I have nothing to hide.” Rob rummaged around in his backpack and pulled out his wallet. He held up a stack of cards and began laying them on the table. “Here’s my driver’s license. And a business card for the networking company I work for with my phone number and e-mail address. This is my library card. And here’s my American Express card.”

  Tracy flashed a grin at him. “Oooh, a gold card. You didn’t leave home without it. I don’t think a serial killer would show me his gold card.” She pointed at his chest. “And the logo on the business card is the same as the one embroidered on your shirt.”

  He looked down and pulled the shirt away from his body to examine the logo. “I could have stolen the shirt.”

  “I don’t think so. No one steals logo wear.” She waved at the cards on the table. “Fine. You have convinced me you’re really Robert J. Thompson, a networking guy with big feet who reads books. I suppose I can go to this meeting if you want. But I need to talk to my friend Shelby. I’m staying with her while I’m taking this class, and I’d have to do that again. And I need to talk to my boss at work. When is the meeting?”

  “They said they want to talk sometime next week. I can ask them if we can do it Friday afternoon so you can come down for the weekend again. Would that work?”

  “I guess so.”

  “Great! I’ll give you a call this week with the details after I get it set up.”

  After finishing their coffee, they exchanged phone numbers and shook hands. Tracy went to the bus stop and sat down on the bench to wait for her public transportation to arrive. She still didn’t have a completely good feeling about this arrangement. Rob seemed nice enough. And five-hundred dollars was five-hundred dollars. But what if she screwed up this meeting? It wouldn’t be the first time she’d choked under pressure. But hey, Rob had asked her to do this, even after seeing how pathetic she was at saving and finding computer files. The guy knew what he was getting into.

  Tracy drove The Turd down the driveway toward Kat’s house. After grabbing her stuff from Shelby’s place, she had experienced a long, unpleasant drive through horrible city traffic. In a way, bumping slowly through the potholes littered throughout the driveway was a relief. At least she was away from other drivers intent on going eighty miles an hour. The freeway was a scary place for a car that couldn’t go faster than sixty. Or okay, maybe fifty-five. Here deep in the forest, it was pitch dark and pouring rain, which made the giant road craters difficult to spot until the front end of the car splashed into one of the swampy lakes. But the old car was a veteran of far worse rural roads, so it didn’t really matter. It wasn’t like the thing could get any uglier or more beat up.

  At last, the lights of the house appeared through the foggy darkness. The muddy smears on the windshield made the view look like a poorly done painting you might find above the bed at a cheap motel. Tracy parked as close to the front of the house as she could. She leaped out of the car, slammed the door, and ran up the steps to the landing. Fortunately, there was a roof over the area, but she still huddled as close as she could to the door and rapped her knuckles on the tongue-and-groove wood.

  Kat opened the door, let Tracy in, and said, “You made it! Roxy is going to be so glad to see you.”

  Tracy rushed through the door and stood dripping in the entryway. “Ugh, it’s just pouring out there. The fall rains have arrived. And it’s only going to get worse.”

  “Please come in. Why don’t you take off that wet coat and warm up while I go get Roxy? Joel finally fired up the wood stove because he got tired of listening to me whine about being cold.”

  Tracy took off her coat and walked into the kitchen, where it was significantly warmer. “I’m not a big fan of cold either. I think you and I may be in trouble when winter arrives for real.”

  Kat walked toward the back of the house and disappeared into the bedroom. The crate door clanged and Roxy came rushing out. Tracy bent down and gathered the little dog in her arms. “Hi there! Were you good?”

  The two women loaded Roxy and the crate into the car. They came back inside and stood in the entryway as Tracy rummaged around in her bag for her check. She looked up. “So where is Joel?”

  Kat waved in the general direction of the stairs down to the basement. “He’s in his office doing nerdy stuff, I think. There was...ah...a little problem and he hurt his arm, which is slowing down his typing, I guess.”

  “What happened? It wasn’t while he was out cutting wood
, was it? Is he okay?”

  “I wasn’t going to bring it up, but he had to get Roxy out of a cabinet. You were right. She has a thing for kitchenware.”

  “Oh no. I’m sorry.” Tracy looked down at the floor. “I guess you’re not going to be willing to board her again, are you? That’s not unusual, really. No one wants to take care of Roxy after the first time. I can’t leave her with my parents and I can’t bring her with me to Shelby’s place either. Both of them have banished Roxy from their premises. My mom and dad have farm dogs and work all day. The last time I left Roxy at their place, it was bad. They lost her under the woodshed for a while. Roxy thought the whole experience was really fun. Mom was less amused. Dad even less so. In fact, I think he’s still mad.” He still referred to Roxy as “that long hairy rodent.”

  Kat leaned against the door. “And your friend won’t let her stay either?”

  “No. Shelby’s cat Billy Bob is bigger than Roxy and they really don’t get along. You probably know this, but interspecies disagreements are extremely unpleasant. And a little scary, even. Shelby is my best friend, but she said she’d let me rot out on the street—to use her words—rather than let Roxy in her apartment again.”

  Kat gestured toward the kitchen. “I guess it’s a little comforting to know it’s not just me. I suppose it wasn’t really that bad. I should have been watching Roxy more closely. She’s really good in her crate and she was so sweet sitting next to me on the sofa while I was reading. I guess I got complacent.”

  Tracy chuckled. “Yeah, that’s her M.O. You think, oh what an adorable little dog. She won’t do anything. Then half your kitchen is all over the floor.”

  “Actually, I took the pots and pans out of the cabinet, so I can’t blame her for that. Roxy got behind the cabinet and Joel had to take it apart to get her out. That’s when he hurt his arm. On a positive note, she can’t get back there again. Joel put in a new board and reassembled the lazy Susan one-handed. It was pretty tricky. He was definitely not in a good mood, though. After I put all the pots and pans back in the cabinet, I decided to lay low.”

  Tracy reached out and touched Kat’s forearm. “I’m so sorry. That doesn’t sound good. I hate to ask this after what happened, but would you be able to board Roxy again? It would only be one night. This Friday I am supposed to go to a meeting in the city.”

  The expression on Kat’s face was impassive and hard to read, but after an uncomfortably long pause, she finally said, “Okay. It will be fine. I’ll talk to Joel.”

  Tracy let out the breath she’d been holding. “Thank you so much! I’ll bring her by here on Friday morning.” She’d already mentally spent the $500 Rob was supposed to give her. Rent, food, an oil change for The Turd before winter. Maybe a new coat too.

  Tracy left the house before Kat could change her mind. She rushed down the steps through the driving rain and got into the car, where Roxy was contentedly snoozing in the back seat. Tracy turned the heater on full blast, listening to the engine warm up in its sickly, sputtery way. At least the stupid thing started. If it got any colder, the car was going to stage a rebellion.

  She turned around in the seat to look at the dog. “Listen here, Roxy, you need to get over this kitchen thing.” The dog raised her head. “Yeah, don’t look all innocent at me. I found out what you did. And no matter what you think, it was definitely not funny.” Roxy wagged the tip of her feathery tail lightly. “No. I don’t think they like you. Right now, I’m pretty sure I don’t like you. And you had better be a good dog on Friday.” Roxy put her head down and closed her eyes.

  Tracy sighed. The word was getting out about Roxy. Soon no one in Alpine Grove would be willing to take this dog off her hands, even for a weekend. She’d never be able to take a vacation again. Not that she could afford one. She could be trapped here forever.

  Kat closed the door and leaned back against it. Having Roxy out of the house was a relief. Joel was going to kill her for letting Tracy drop the dog off again on Friday. Linus came over and leaned his large body against her. She stroked the smooth fur on his head. “Yeah, Big Guy. I know. I have to tell him. Let’s go downstairs and get it over with.”

  Linus wagged eagerly and charged down the stairs. Kat followed more slowly and significantly less enthusiastically. She leaned in the doorway of Joel’s office. Linus settled into a spot on the floor next to Lady, who was curled up in a tight furry ball. Joel was sitting at his computer, frowning at the monitor. His left hand was grasped around his right forearm, holding it up against his stomach. He looked over his shoulder at her. “Is Roxy gone?”

  “Yes. She’s Tracy’s problem again. Are you feeling any better?”

  “I’m okay.”

  “You don’t look okay. You have a death grip on your arm. Shouldn’t you go to a doctor?”

  “I hate doctors. I’ll just take some more aspirin. It’s fine.”

  Kat walked over and stood behind the chair, putting her hands on his broad shoulders. “How do you know your arm isn’t broken?”

  He looked back up into her face. “You realize you’re being a nag about this, right? It’s just a bruise. I’m fine.”

  Kat scowled. The macho thing could be so annoying. “I am not being a nag. I’m just worried. If you broke your arm, you might need a cast or something. It could get worse.”

  “It’s not broken. If it were, when it happened, my arm would have swollen more and been a lot more painful.”

  Kat ran her fingers through the hair that was curling down past his collar. “How do you know? Have you broken a bone before?”

  “Yes.”

  She trailed her index finger behind his ear. “Would you care to share that story?”

  “No.”

  “Are you sure you’re okay? You seem, um, grumpy.”

  “Pain makes me grumpy.”

  Kat bent to kiss his cheek. “I’m sorry.” She patted his shoulder. “Since you’re obviously not in a talkative mood, I’ll just share this little tidbit before I go back upstairs. Roxy is returning on Friday.”

  Joel swiveled the chair around to face her. “You’re kidding, right?”

  “No. I caved. It’s just for one night. I promise I’ll keep her attached to me or in her crate. Really.”

  Kat walked back upstairs followed by Linus, Tessa, and Chelsey. When had Joel broken a bone? She’d make it her mission to find out sooner or later. But right now she had enough other things to worry about. Time for some escapist reading. She settled onto the sofa with her novel. The dogs all flopped on the floor for their evening nap. The phone rang and Kat jumped up. After navigating the canine obstacle course littering the floor, she grabbed the receiver off the ancient harvest-gold wall phone and was greeted by her friend Maria’s voice on the other end of the line.

  “Hey girlfriend, what’s up?”

  Kat sat down at the table. “Just another hopping night in Alpine Grove. How’s the new place? Better than Melrose?” Maria had just moved to a new apartment. The prior complex where she’d lived had been so filled with neighborhood drama that she’d taken to referring to it as Melrose Place.

  “So far, so good. I’m glad to be outta Melrose, that’s for sure. I got those weirdo Dungeons and Dragons dudes in the mail room to help me move my stuff. It’s amazing what twenty-two-year-old fantasy nerds will do for a slice of pizza. I’m thinking they don’t get out much.”

  “Uh, no. When I worked there, that skinny guy Duncan used to have a creepy way of staring at me.”

  “I know. When he was lifting boxes, I thought he was gonna kill himself because he wasn’t looking where he was going. I had to have some words with him. I told him, ‘listen here, they’re boobs. Fifty percent of the population has them. I have them. Get over it.’ Actually I think I embarrassed him, if you want to know the truth.”

  “So did he stop the creepy staring?”

  “Not really. But these guys probably don’t get an up-close look at a fine woman like me very often, so I couldn’t blame them too much.“


  Kat leaned back in her chair and put her feet up on another one. “So now that you’re all moved into the new place, have you returned to the job quest?”

  “Yes I have. And I need resume help. That’s why I’m calling. You’re the writer. I am not having much luck getting across my personal abilities in this document. It’s too limiting. I need more flexibility, so I can express myself.”

  “Resumes are about facts, not free expression.”

  “Whatever. If I send what I have to you, will you look at it?”

  “Sure. No problem.”

  “So how’s the sexy engineer?”

  Kat dropped her feet off the chair, leaned her elbows on the table and sighed. “I think he might have broken his arm, but he says he didn’t.”

  “What did you two do? Do I even want to know this? Is it something kinky? Or some country-living thing? That rural life you’ve got going there is dangerous, you know. Farm animals weren’t involved, were they?”

  “No. You know I only deal with dogs and cats. It’s a long story, but basically Joel had to take apart a cabinet and he hit his arm. He got kind of mad about the whole thing.” And he was still mad. Silent and surly was not a lot of fun to be around.

  “That’s probably not doing much for your sex life.”

  Kat sighed. “No. But thank you for your concern.”

  “Speaking of your extracurricular activities, how’s Aunt Flo? Has she arrived at the station yet?”

  Kat leaned her forehead on the table and stared down at her feet on the floor. “No. I don’t want to talk about it. And come on, Aunt Flo? Who even says that?”

  “I was trying to be discreet. You’d prefer Cousin Red? Red tide? Woman trouble? Wait, you’re just trying to distract me. It’s not me you need to talk to about this, girlfriend. First you need to go to the drugstore and get the little tester thingie. Then, depending on what you find out, you need to bring the engineer in on your little secret. If Kat is having a kitten, he’s in a definite need-to-know situation.”