Let Slip the Pups of War: Spot and Smudge - Book Three

by Robert Udulutch

  Faith laughed and said, “You should try it, Jean. It adds a certain, bite.”

  “Can you see me nipping into Spar’s for my messages and asking my bawheeded clerk where he keeps his crocodile sausage?” Mimi said, “He’d send me off to boil my head.”

  “Or wink at you and proposition you on the spot,” Faith said, “Speaking of bawheeds, can you send down some more Bisto with Hamish next time he comes?”

  “Yebo,” Mimi said, and tapped the tablet’s screen to shrink Faith to a small window.

  As she added a tin of the gravy mix to her shopping list she noticed movement outside the kitchen window. She looked over her reading glasses and watched her granddaughter running from their pier. She bound up the cottage’s walkway and barged into the kitchen.

  Kelcy said, “Meem, they’re coming!”

  “Hundreds,” Mimi said, “I’m going to splash up a bit, say hello to Faith.” As she tossed her dish towel over Kelcy’s shoulder she waved goodbye to the elderly dark woman on the tablet and started to hum as she walked towards the stairs.

  Kelcy spun the tablet around and tapped so Faith’s smiling face filled the screen again.

  “Hey Faith,” she said, “How are my newlyweds doing?”

  “Hello Miss Kels,” Faith said, “You’re looking prettier than ever. Your rhinos are lekker, dear. Here, hang one second.”

  The screen jostled and Kelcy saw the ranch’s newly constructed kitchen float past in the background. Bushes and flowers whisked by and Kelcy could tell Faith had taken her tablet to the edge of the new boma. She pointed the tablet’s camera down at the watering hole and zoomed in.

  “Can you see?” Faith asked.

  “Yebo,” Kelcy said, “Oh wow, they look so good!”

  Two big rhinos were walking side by side on the bank as Vuur and Tera trotted alongside them. Kelcy could see the animals were having a conversation. The accelerated rhinos used the same head nods and body language as the accelerated dogs walking next to them.

  “The doctor says she’s probably four months along,” Faith said, “And healthy as a horse. A big, round, two-ton horse.”

  “Four months?” Kelcy said, “So we have almost a year to wait, unless the pregnancy is accelerated, pardon the pun. Did she say anything about the baby?”

  “You mean is she smart?” Faith said, “No way to tell yet.”

  “She? It’s a baby girl?” Kelcy asked.

  The image on the tablet moved again as Faith walked to the boma so she could sit in the shade.

  “Yebo,” Faith said, “And when Rook asked the happy couple if they wanted to know the sex of the baby the mother rhino shook her head, but papa rhino nodded yes. Theo’s still laughing about it.”

  “That’s too funny,” Kelcy said, “How is Uncle Theo?”

  “I’ve never seen the big numpty happier,” Faith said. She leaned closer to the tablet and said, “Listen to me Kels, something amazing is happening here. I was just telling your Mimi, whatever it is those pups of yours have been working on with Tera and the boerboels must have taken root. The dogs and rhinos now have some kind of communication loop with the painted dogs and the wild elephants. We don’t fully understand it yet but whenever there’s a whiff of poacher activity in the reserve the rhinos hear about it from Jock and the ellys. More importantly, they know the poacher’s location to within a few hundred meters. With the rapid response of the pilots who’ve decided to stay, the dog teams are onsite with Musa’s men in minutes. We haven’t lost an animal in weeks.”

  “That’s the coolest thing I’ve ever heard,” Kelcy said.

  Through the kitchen window Kelcy watched a small boat approaching the dock. It slowed and Ben leaned over the side and tossed out a pair of pier bumpers. They rolled on the gunwale as the boat’s engines reversed and chop churned at the stern.

  “Theo’s having our cousins from Kruger down next week,” Faith said, “We’re trying to figure out how much to actually share with them. Honestly, it’s a little embarrassing we don’t even know how it works.”

  Kelcy said, “I’ll talk to Ben and we’ll get Spot to stop being so cloak and dagger about it. You know how he is. That dog always plays it close to the vest ‘cause if it didn’t work he’d be embarrassed. We couldn’t have that.”

  Faith said, “Perish the thought. That’d be super, thanks dear.”

  Kelcy watched Ben jump off the boat with the bow line.

  “I gotta go, Faith,” Kelcy said, “Say hi to the gang there for me, and all of those mangy curs. We’ll call you later.”

  ”Yebo,” Faith said, “Give those little ones an extra kiss and a pat from me.” She blew a kiss and waved goodbye before Kelcy closed the call.

  Kelcy bolted from the kitchen and raced down the stone path as a tall woman ducked under the boat’s canopy. As Ben was securing the stern line and their dad cut the boat’s engine Kelcy cleared the steps down to the dock in one jump.

  She ran down the pier and leapt into Comina’s arms.

  They embraced for a long while, and into her shoulder Kelcy asked, “How was New York, and London?”

  “Uncomfortably hot,” Comina said as she looked down and held Kelcy’s stare, “for about three tenths of a second.”

  Kelcy nodded and gave Comina a squeeze. “You rock, Loyal, and I’m so glad you came. Come on, Mimi and the pups are going to flip when they see you.”

  “I couldn’t miss this,” Comina said, “but you two kids need to stop growing. I thought you were your mother.”

  Dan told Comina to leave her small rolling bag as Kelcy took her by the hand and pulled her up the dock.

  The excited teen spun Comina around in a slow circle as they approached the top of the steep cottage path. The sweeping view was breathtaking and lit up by shafts of bright sunlight that punched through the rolling blanket of low gray clouds. The shafts ended in circles of vivid blue that danced on the shimmering waters of the wide Firth of Clyde spread out below them. Kelcy pointed out the low hills of the isles of Bute and Arran in the distance. She nodded to the ferry creeping by on its way to Dunoon, and the lush slopes of the Cowal highlands behind it. Where the patches of sun hit the hills it exploded in rich greens, and mixed in with the purple dots of the flowering heather were hundreds of puffs of grazing white sheep.

  Comina could just see the top of the little clock tower in Wemyss Bay where Ben had been waiting when she stepped off the train from Glasgow. They had stopped to chat with a dozen afternoon strollers and shopkeepers while walking along the waterfront to the boat. In their expressive, singing accents the locals asked about his visitor and told him to say hello to his Mimi. Most wanted to know if they’d be needing anything from town, and their smiling faces asked Comina how her trip was getting on. They also inquired if she’d packed for all four seasons, which they explained could be experienced several times on any given day in Scotland. She noticed all of them shared the Walker’s habit of immediately speaking to her as if they’d been friends for years, and she also noticed she was quickly falling in love with Inverclyde. She couldn’t recall exactly where she’d heard it, but someone had once told her this was a place you could get homesick for after just one visit. Comina was beginning to agree, and found herself wishing she’d packed a larger bag…and for more seasons.

  As Kelcy continued dragging her up the stony path, and explaining the amazing views, they approached what Mimi had called her cottage. Comina thought that may have been a joke as they got closer. The home was so completely at peace with its surroundings its sprawling size was deceiving. It appeared to have just grown right out of the hilly forest. The stone walls were covered by a slate roof with eyebrow windows, and the ivy-covered arch over the front gate was flanked by lovely flower and vegetable gardens. She thought she could have been standing in front of a painting.

  “Nice digs,” Comina said, “Did you just ask the estate agent to find you something from a Burns’ poem?”

  “I know, right?” Kelcy said, “Mimi and Hamish
grew up not far from here and used to play in the barn out back. When she found out this cottage was available to let she jumped at it. Not sure if we’re staying, but its lekker for now. It’s a little big but Mom and Meem like having everyone under one roof.”

  As she held open the gate to the garden Kelcy said, “I probably don’t have to tell you this but don’t ask Hamish about the house unless you have an hour to kill. He’ll bend your ear off about their childhood home around the way, and how it was much more humble. Apparently they woke up three hours before they went to bed and ate coal for breakfast.”

  “Ach, they had coal?” Comina said, nailing the accent, “Luxury!”

  “Exactly,” Kelcy said with a smile.

  Comina heard a familiar bleating and Kelcy nodded to the white fence at the far end of the garden. As they walked up to the gate Mr. Watt bound across the pen and bashed into the wooden pickets. Comina reached over the fence and scratched his head as the old goat grunted and stomped, and wagged his little tail happily.

  Ben and Dan came up the path with Comina’s rolling bag and some sacks of groceries, and waved for the pair to join them as they entered the house.

  Mimi met them at the door and pulled the tall woman into her arms before she could step through the threshold. Pushing back to hold her at arm’s length, Mimi took a good long look at her. She thought Comina had lost a few pounds but was satisfied it was nothing a cuppa and a few strawberry tarts couldn’t fix.

  She let go of her shoulders and told Comina they’d get her settled in later as there was a group waiting for her.

  Kelcy led her down the hall and into a large family room. The furniture had been pushed back so the middle of the room was a large circle ringed with blankets and pillows.

  There were a dozen people and dogs sprawled out on the couches and the floor. The humans called out her name in unison. As Comina stepped into the room they all raised their tea cups while the dogs wagged and yapped a warm welcome.

  Tian got up from the floor and carefully stepped over the piles of pillows and thumping tails, guiding a pretty Asian woman ahead of him. He leaned in and hugged Comina, and gave her a kiss on the cheek. He bowed slightly and presented the woman next to him, “Agent Comina, this is Du Wen Cai.”

  Du Wen hugged Comina, and she barely reached her chest.

  She looked up and said, “It’s so nice to finally meet you face to face, Loyal.”

  “And you as well, Du,” Comina said as she put her hands on Du Wen’s shoulders and smiled down at her.

  Tian look confused for a second, and then caught his fiancee’s broad smile.

  “How often?” Tian asked with his hands on his hips.

  Du Wen looked up at Comina and said, “I would say the three of us talk every couple of weeks, more or less?”

  Comina nodded.

  Du Wen turned to Tian and said, “Jean loved my egg tart recipe, and these meddling matchmakers would only give me all the dirt about your heroism if I promised not to bust them until we could all be together.”

  The laughing group behind Tian raised their tea cups again.

  Mimi appeared next to Comina. She gently pushed Tian back towards his seat and said, “Don’t worry young man, she only shared a few of your wee baby pictures.” As Tian turned away Mimi puffed up her cheeks and acted like she was waddling.

  The crowd laughed, and Tian yanked a giggling Du Wen behind him as Kelcy reached up to high-five her as they passed.

  Mimi handed Comina a steaming mug and said, “No sugar with a spot of milk. Unless Dr. Loyal Comina takes her tea differently than that lying bitch Lindsay Vaux did. Sorry about the coffee mug, we’re light on proper cups with all the riff-raff visiting.”

  “No, that’s perfect,” Comina said.

  As Comina took the cup Mimi covered her hands with her own warm hands, and held her eyes. She said quietly, “You’ve done a fine job, Loyal. I’m proud of you, and I thank you for taking care of things. Those two kids, and those smart little dogs over there are safe because of you. We’re all safe because of you, and we owe you more than we could ever repay.”

  Comina was taken aback by the strength in those words. She said, “Jean, I…”

  The smart, tough, ex-federal agent with the double doctorate couldn’t finish her sentence. She just stared into the kind grandmother’s eyes and fought to keep from welling up. Although they had been Jean’s words, it was VB’s voice she had heard.

  Comina’s sudden flood of emotion wasn’t sitting well with her. She tried to attribute it to her long journey and the stressful events of the last few months, but the voice deep inside wasn’t letting her get away with it. VB was telling her that being here was exactly what she needed. He pointed out the years of pretending to be someone else, avoiding serious relationships, and prioritizing study and career over family had left a hole in her. A hole this cunning old woman and her strange family were filling.

  Comina nodded to that little voice. She understood how Tian, and Andi, and Nikki had gotten addicted to this crazy bunch. They were like a light in the dark, and the warmth and energy they gave off was better than any medicine or therapy.

  Comina could see Mimi reading her thoughts as easily as if she had said them aloud. The grandmother patted Comina’s hand.

  “Aye, dearie,” Mimi said as she nodded at the family room, “This is what’s important. This is why we fought so hard. We’re glad you made the trek to be here with us. You’re family, and you’re in the right place, Loyal.”

  Hamish had been watching his sister-in-law read Comina, and smiled broadly as the women hugged. He gave Blu’s hand a squeeze and got up from his chair. He pulled Mimi and Comina apart and dropped an arm around both of them. As Comina dabbed at the corners of her eyes Hamish gave both women a smile, and then walked the tall woman through the maze of chatting people and dogs. He steered her to a spot near the fireplace as Aila and Christa slid apart, shoved Sholto over, and patted the big pillow between them.

  Satisfied everyone was comfortable, Mimi dropped onto the couch next to Nikki and watched the room over the rim of her cup. She smiled, enjoying the soft buzz of the overlapping conversations peppered with frequent outbursts of laughter.

  Mimi watched Ben translating a joke for Spot. The black dog was gesturing happily with his split paws. Smudge jumped in, trying to ruin the punchline as Kelcy pounced and fought to grab her signing paws.

  As Dan reached over to help Kelcy he caught Mimi’s eye. He nodded, and smiled, and held down Smudge as his laughing teenage daughter beat the wagging dog with her little stuffed chicken toy.

  Mimi imagined Papa sitting on the window seat, lighting his pipe and nodding while his brother Hamish spun his tale of the rogue wolves. A mesmerized Tian, Du Wen, and Seamus stared at Hamish who spread his arms wide as the story rose to a climax. Seamus’ brown eyebrows shot up and his nubby tail twitched as Hamish clamped down on his furry black neck with hands formed into wolf claws.

  As Mimi took another sip she felt a soft tapping on her foot.

  The grandmother looked down to see a tiny, all black puppy staring up at her.

  The little girl dog nodded at her teacup.

  Mimi lowered the cup so the puppy could lap at it, and her two tiny brothers trotted over to join her. The three little pink tongues darted over the lip of the cup as they looked up at Mimi with their big, smart brown eyes.

  She smiled down at them as their wee tails wagged back and forth in perfect sync.

  Afterword from your author

  Early fall, a little south of Boston…

  I could move to southern Africa tomorrow and never leave. As the good doctor Marty Osipoff once said it’s the kind of place you could visit once and be homesick for forever. The rest of my days could easily be filled lounging in the boma with a cup of tea while tossing bits of Rusk biscuits to the baby warthogs.

  The only problem with my amazing African adventures was the fictional Spot and Smudge didn’t like being left behind. As I safaried by
elephant, watched painted dogs hunt, and patted rescued cheetahs the accelerated pups kept butting in. Every alien vista and incredible creature I encountered got me thinking about our smart, split-pawed protagonists. I couldn’t help but wonder how they would fare in this intense place, and I especially wondered how they would interact with all of these unique, threatened, dangerous, and incredibly adapted animals.

  The pups were making it very clear they were going to Africa in this third book, and I’ve learned not to fight them. As I’m sure you’ve noticed by now, Spot is always right and Smudge always gets her way. And after seeing what happens to those who try to cross them…well, let’s just say I’m not fond of being choked, stabbed, bitten, or blown up.

  So here I sit, back at my little desk in Massachusetts as the leaves change, cranking out book three with a pair of black dogs lounging next to me. They seem to be enjoying the story as I run each chapter by them for approval. I’m certainly no Ben but I’ve gotten pretty good at reading their head tips and ear perks, and would swear their reaction to what that rhino just did to Semion would translate as, “Hundreds bru, that’s lekker!”

  I hope you’re enjoying these bloody smart pups and their wee adventures as much as my dogs seem to be, and as much as I love bringing them to the page.

  If you are, please let me know.

  If you aren’t, I’d like to invite you over to the boma for a cuppa and a few Rusks, and then maybe the pups can take you out for a jog with the painted dogs.

  Regards, BU

  One million eye rolls, and counting…

  There is an amazing group of creative, sharp, patient people who save me from myself. I’m convinced dogs learn loyalty from people like them…and they could teach coyotes a few things about rending flesh, too, and I mean that in the best possible way. These stories simply wouldn’t happen without their many talents. Thanks, Alphas.

  Allison Caputo

  Chelsea Watt