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Reunited by a Baby Secret (The Vineyards of Calanetti, Book 3)

Page 17

by Michelle Douglas


  ‘I wouldn’t agree.’

  ‘I know that,’ she whispered back, managing a genuine smile this time. Ryan might be a complete and utter idiot, but he had eased her fears about her brothers.

  Time to change the subject. ‘Where’s Angelo?’

  ‘Out with Kayla.’

  ‘Naturally.’

  They grinned at each other. ‘We’ve missed you, Mari.’

  She gave him a quick hug. ‘I’ve missed you too.’

  She made tea and they settled on the sofa. ‘Now catch me up on all the news.’

  * * *

  Ryan turned the hire car in at the gates of Vigneto Calanetti and made his way down the long drive. He’d been away less than three weeks, but he swore the grapevines were lusher and greener. The sky was blue and the day was warm, and inside his chest his heart pounded like a jackhammer.

  Would she see him?

  Please, God, let her spare him ten minutes. Please give him at least ten minutes to make his mark, to try and win her love.

  He parked the hire car out at the front of Nico’s villa. He wanted to race straight across to Marianna’s cottage, but instinct warned him to check in with her brothers first. He wanted to do things right—by the book. He didn’t want to make things worse for Marianna than he already had.

  He recalled the last look she’d sent him, filled with pain and utter betrayal, and his gut clenched. Please, God, let her be okay. Please let her and the baby be in good health.

  He knocked on the villa’s wide-open door and tried to control the pounding of his heart. If Marianna should appear now...

  He stared down the hallway, willing it to happen. A figure did appear. A male figure. It was what he’d expected, but he had to lock his knees against the disappointment. ‘Nico,’ he said in greeting as the other man strode down the hallway.

  ‘Ryan.’

  They stared at each other for a long moment. Nico bit back a sigh. ‘She’s not going to want to see you.’

  ‘I can’t say as though I blame her. I messed up.’ Ryan pulled in a breath. ‘I messed up badly. I won’t retaliate if you want to take a swing at me.’ He wouldn’t even block the blow.

  ‘I’m not going to hit you, but...whatever it is you want to say, can’t you put it in an email?’

  He moistened suddenly dry lips. ‘I want to ask her to marry me.’

  ‘For the sake of the baby?’

  He shook his head. ‘Not for the baby.’

  ‘I see.’

  Ryan suspected he did.

  ‘I suppose I better take you to her.’

  Ryan followed him through the house, out the French doors and across the terrace towards the outbuildings. ‘You think I need an escort? I have no intention of harming a single hair on Mari’s head.’

  ‘I realise that, but my loyalty lies with my sister.’ He cast a sidelong glance at Ryan. ‘My one consolation is that you look in even worse shape than she does.’

  Ryan seized Nico by the shoulders and dragged him to a halt, fear cramping his chest. ‘She isn’t well?’ he croaked.

  ‘Physically she’s fine. She’s taking very good care of her health.’

  He released Nico, dragged a hand down his face and then continued to plant one foot in front of the other, his blood pounding a furious tempo through his body. ‘That’s...that’s something.’

  ‘It is.’

  They walked through the shadowed cool of the vineyard’s cellar door, skirting a group of tourists wine tasting, and out the back to where the great barrels of wine were stored, and then beyond that to the fermentation vats. That was when he saw her. He pulled up short and drank her in like a starving man.

  In the soft light her hair fizzed about her face. He watched her direct a team of three workers to move barrels from one location to another and she then checked the gauges on the nearest vat. Her slim, vigorous form so familiar to him it made his arms ache with the need to hold her.

  And then she turned and saw him. She froze. Her every muscle tightened and a bitter taste rose in his mouth. He did that to her. He made her tense and unhappy.

  He thought she’d simply turn around and walk away. After several fraught moments, however, she lifted her chin and moved towards them. But her body that had once moved with such freedom and grace was now held tight and rigid. He had to bite back a protest. How could he have done that to her?

  ‘I don’t want you here, Ryan. Please go.’

  Her pallor and the dark circles beneath her eyes beat at him. ‘I can’t say that I blame you.’ He stared down at his hands and then back at her. ‘I came to apologise. What I said—’

  ‘Pah!’ She slashed a hand through the air.

  He tried to take her hand, but she snapped back a step, her eyes flashing.

  He swallowed and nodded. ‘What I said... I was wrong. I know you will love our child with your whole heart. I know you will never abandon it. And just because that’s what I experienced in my family...’ He shook his head. ‘I had no right tarring you with the same brush. It was an excuse I was hiding behind. It let me justify to myself the amount of time I was spending with you. It helped me keep my distance. I... I didn’t realise I’d been lying to myself, though, until you walked out of Mum’s hospital room.’

  She folded her arms and glanced away, tapped a foot. ‘How is your mother?’

  ‘Excellent. She sends her love. So does Rebecca.’

  She finally glanced back. ‘I accept your apology, Ryan, but I’m afraid you and I are never going to be friends.’

  ‘I don’t want to be friends.’

  She paled and eased back another step. ‘I’m glad we have that sorted.’ Spinning on her heel, she stalked away.

  ‘Damn it, Marianna!’ Had she wilfully misunderstood him? ‘I want a whole lot more than friendship,’ he hollered to her back. ‘I want it all—love, marriage, babies...a family.’ He punctuated each word with a stab in the air, but she didn’t turn around. ‘With you!’

  She didn’t so much as falter. He shook off Nico’s restraining hand and set off after her, muttering a curse under his breath. He waited, though, until she’d reached her stone cottage before catching her up.

  She wheeled on him. ‘Get out of my house!’

  ‘I’ll leave once you hear me out.’

  ‘I’ve heard enough!’

  ‘You’ve only heard what you want to hear!’

  ‘Mari?’ Nico stood in the doorway, one eyebrow raised.

  Ryan planted his feet all the more solidly. No one was kicking him off the premises until he’d done what he’d come here to do.

  Marianna’s eyes flashed as if she’d read that intention in his face. She glanced at her watch. ‘If his car is still here in ten minutes, come back with Angelo.’

  With a nod, Nico left.

  She was going to give him ten minutes?

  He couldn’t speak for a moment. He had to fight the urge to haul her into his arms and kiss her. If he did any such thing he’d deserve to be thrown out.

  She remained where she stood, bathed in the sunlight that poured in at the kitchen windows, tapping her foot. She glanced at her watch as if counting down every second of his allotted ten minutes.

  He missed her smile and her teasing. He even missed her untidiness and her temper. He’d rather she threw something at him than this nothingness.

  ‘Since you left,’ he started, ‘I’ve been in a misery of guilt, a misery of mortification at my stupidity, and a misery of loss.’

  ‘Good.’ She lifted her chin. ‘Why should you be exempt? I’ve been miserable on my baby’s behalf that its father is such a jerk.’

  His head throbbed. What was he doing here other than making a fool of himself? He should turn around and leave. She loathed him and he couldn’t blame her. She was going to laugh at him; throw his love back in his face.

  It’s no less than you deserve.

  He pulled in a breath and steeled himself. ‘I love you, Mari.’ He had to say what he’d come here to say. />
  Her eyes narrowed. ‘I told you not to call me that.’

  He ground his teeth together, unclenched them to say, ‘I love you, Marianna.’

  She moved in to peer up into his face. ‘Piffle.’ She stalked past him to the dining table, but she didn’t sit.

  ‘I want to marry you.’

  She turned at that and laughed. He rocked back, her expression running him through like a sword. He locked his knees. ‘You think it funny?’

  ‘Absolutely hilarious!’ But her flashing eyes and fingers that curved into claws told a different story. ‘You’ve lost whatever advantage you think you had. You believe I’m going to withhold your child from you and this is your way to try and claw back all you’ve lost. I’m sorry, Ryan, but it’s not going to work.’

  The last puff of hope eased out of him in a single breath.

  ‘You needn’t worry, though.’ She tossed her hair. ‘I’m not going to stop you from seeing our child, but the visitation arrangements will be on my terms.’

  He moistened his lips. ‘This isn’t about the baby, Mari.’

  She turned away with a shrug, not even bothering to correct him—as if it no longer mattered to her what he called her. She glanced at her watch.

  This couldn’t be it! Where would he find that strength to walk away from her?

  Think! How could he win her heart? What is it she wants?

  He pulled up short. Passion, an undying love, and to never be bored—those were the things Marianna wanted. Could he give them to her?

  He pulled in a breath and channelled his inner thespian. ‘You want to know what I’ve been doing for the last two weeks?’ He roared the words and she started and turned around, her eyes wide.

  He stalked over to where she stood and stabbed a finger at her. ‘I’ve been working on my relationships with my family so I’d have something of worth to offer you! And you want to laugh in my face and act as if it’s nothing when it’s been one of the most difficult and...and frightening things I’ve ever done?’

  She moistened her lips and edged away. ‘I didn’t intend to belittle your...um, efforts. I’m... I’m sure they’ve been very admirable.’

  ‘My efforts!’ He threw both hands in the air and then paced the length of the room. He prayed to God he wasn’t frightening her. He hated yelling at her, but if that was what she needed as proof of his love, then he’d do it.

  He swung back to find her biting her thumbnail and staring at him, a frown in her eyes.

  ‘If I’m correct it’s not my efforts being disparaged but my intentions!’

  He glared at her as hard as he could. She pulled her hand away from her mouth and straightened. ‘You come in here and say outlandish things and expect me to believe you?’

  ‘Saying I love you is not outlandish!’ How could he make her see that? His gaze landed on the vase her brothers had given her. He grabbed it and lifted it above his head. ‘I can’t live without you, Mari! How can I get that through your thick skull?’

  * * *

  Marianna’s bottom lip started to wobble, though she did her best to stop it. ‘You’re...you’re going to throw a vase at me?’

  He stared at her, and then rolled his shoulder. ‘Of course not.’ He lowered the vase, grimaced. ‘I was going to throw it on the floor as evidence of my...high emotion.’

  She couldn’t drag her gaze from him. It hurt her to look at him, but she had a feeling it’d hurt more to look away.

  I can’t live without you!

  She swallowed. ‘Please don’t break the vase. I...it has sentimental value.’ Whenever she looked at it, it reminded her of her and Ryan’s dinner with her brothers here in this cottage, and the conversation she and Ryan had had afterwards...how kind he’d been...and gentle.

  She much preferred that Ryan to the shouting, angry man who’d just raged at her. It occurred to her now that his calm and his control had given her a safe harbour—that was what she wanted, not a stormy sea.

  Ryan set the vase back on the table just as her brothers burst into the room—their bodies tense, fists clenched and eyes blazing. Had they heard him yelling at her?

  Angelo seemed to grow in size. ‘Nobody speaks to our sister like that!’

  They moved towards Ryan with unmistakable intent. ‘No!’ she screeched. Ryan’s time might be up, but... She did the only thing she could think of. She ran across the room and hurled herself into Ryan’s arms. He caught her easily, as if she weighed nothing. He held her as if she were precious.

  Her heart pounded and it was all she could do not to melt against him. ‘Turn me around,’ she murmured in his ear.

  He turned so that she could face her brothers. They glared at her, hands on hips. ‘Go away,’ she ordered.

  They didn’t move.

  She tightened her hold on Ryan’s neck, loving the feel of all his hardness and strength pressed against her. ‘I have things under control here.’

  Nico raised an eyebrow. Angelo snorted.

  She widened her eyes, made them big and pleading. ‘Please?’ she whispered.

  Muttering, they left.

  Two beats passed. Marianna swallowed. ‘You can put me down now.’

  ‘Do I have to?’

  ‘Yes.’

  The minute he set her feet back on the ground, she moved away from him—put the table between them. The flare of his nostrils told her that her caution hurt him. She didn’t want to hurt him. She loved him with every fibre of her being, but she couldn’t accept anything less than his whole heart in return.

  The silence stretched, pulling her nerves taut. She wiped damp palms down her trousers. ‘You have to understand that I find your declaration a little unbelievable.’

  ‘Why?’

  ‘Lone wolf,’ she whispered.

  He adjusted his stance. ‘That was a lie I told myself to make me feel better. It doesn’t matter what happens today, I’m never going to be a lone wolf again. That all changed when I thought I’d lost you.’

  He strode around the table and to her utter amazement dropped to his knees in front of her. He seized her hands and held them to his lips, and then his brow. Her heart hammered so hard she thought it’d pound a path right out of her chest.

  ‘I’m nothing without you, Mari.’

  And there it was, the thrill she couldn’t suppress whenever he said her name.

  ‘What I feel for you is so encompassing, so overwhelming it makes the thought of living without you unbearable. It’s why I’d been resisting it so long and why I fought against it so fiercely. But it’s no use fighting it any more or hiding from the truth. Marianna, you make me want to be a better man.’

  He glanced up at her and what she saw in his face pierced her to the very marrow.

  ‘Knowing you has brought untold treasures to my life—a baby.’

  She nodded. He would cherish their child.

  ‘You’ve shown me the way back to my family.’

  Had he really reconciled with his mother? What about his father and the rest of his siblings?

  ‘You’ve given me a vision of what my life could be like.’

  He hauled himself upright, kissed the tips of her fingers before releasing her hands and stepping back. ‘I understand your hesitation. I understand that you might see me as a poor bet.’ He glanced at his watch and his chest heaved. ‘I’ve taken up enough of your time. I should give you the space to consider all that I’ve said.’

  He turned to leave and it was the hunch in his shoulders, the way they drooped in utter defeat that did it—that blasted away the last of her doubts. She pressed a hand to her heart, her pulse leaping every which way. ‘You really do love me.’

  He swung back, hope alive in his face. She could feel her face crumple. ‘But you yelled at me.’

  And then she burst into tears.

  Ryan swooped across and pulled her into his arms, holding her as if he never meant to let her go. ‘I only yelled at you to prove that I really do love you, to prove I could give you the passion th
at you said you’ve always wanted.’

  She eased back, scrubbed a hand across her face. ‘I hated it! I’m an idiot forever thinking that’s what I wanted.’

  He swiped his thumbs across her cheeks. ‘You’re not an idiot.’

  ‘I love you,’ she whispered.

  He nodded gravely. ‘That might make you an idiot.’

  ‘Are you going to break my heart?’

  He shook his head. ‘I’m going to take the very best care of your heart. I’m going to do everything within my power to make you happy.’ The tension in his shoulders eased a fraction. ‘I’m going to be very relieved if not yelling at you is on that list, though.’ He smoothed his hands down the sides of her face. ‘I hated yelling at you. I’m sorry it upset you.’

  She wound her arms around his neck. ‘Then I’m not an idiot. I’m the luckiest woman in the world.’

  Her smile started up in the centre of her and reached out to every extremity. ‘You really love me?’ It wasn’t that she didn’t believe him. She just wanted to hear him say it again.

  ‘I really love you.’ His grin was all the assurance she needed.

  ‘I really love you too,’ she said, just in case he needed to hear it again as well.

  ‘Will you marry me?’

  A lump promptly lodged in her throat, momentarily robbing her of the ability to speak.

  ‘I meant to go down on one knee and propose properly.’

  She swallowed the lump. ‘Don’t you dare let go of me yet.’

  ‘That’s what I was hoping you’d say.’

  This tough loner of a man had really trusted his heart and happiness to her? She touched his face in wonder. He let out a ragged breath. Plastered as closely as she was to him, she could feel how tightly he held himself in check. ‘That...and yes,’ he rasped.

  She came back to herself with a start, the uncertainty in his eyes catching at her. ‘Yes.’

  He blinked.

  ‘Yes, I will marry you. Yes, I will keep your heart safe. Yes, we’ll build a wonderful family together, and grow old together and be generous with our love to all who want and need it.’

  ‘You mean that?’

  She reached up on tiptoe to cup his face. ‘I love you, Ryan. How could you possibly think I would want anything else?’

 

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