“Will I ever see you again Jake?” she pleaded. I met her eyes once more.
“I really hope not Molly.” I turned around and left. I didn’t look back and I knew she hadn’t tried to follow me. It wasn’t the goodbye I had wanted, but, at least, I had said goodbye. There were no tears, at least not until I had left the building. I had one more person to visit.
***
Even as you approached the flats where Lucy lived, you could sense the impoverishment of the place. There was a particular smell that surrounded the building, a sign that this was where the destitute subsisted. It was an existence of life, no more than that. I had been here before but I had never really taken it all in. What chance did anyone have living in a dump like this, never mind the likes of Lucy? The air above the block of flats appeared full of smoke, set against a haze in the sky though there were no chimneys to produce that smoke, no factories pumping out the residue of their produce into the atmosphere. The haze was just a by-product of the life that existed there and seemed to engulf all-comers.
Lucy opened the door to her flat as I knocked. Immediately my nostrils filled with the staleness of her small apartment. The look on her face was a picture of surprise and perhaps a hint of fear.
“Jake!” was all she could say.
“Can I come in?” I responded. She gestured for me to do so and we both walked into the living area. It looked surprisingly clean, still a dump, but a lot cleaner than I last remembered.
“Coffee?” she asked. I nodded with a smile, which seemed to relax her a little. “White, with two sugars, coming up.” She had remembered. She busied herself in the small kitchen as I took a seat on her sofa.
As she laid the two mugs of coffee on the side table, I asked, “You alone?”
“Well, I haven't got a punter in if that’s what you're referring to,” she replied bitterly, spitting out the words. I found myself chuckling.
“I didn’t mean that. It was a genuine question, I need to talk to you,” I told her.
“Sylvie’s staying at friends,” she grunted. “Her mother will be out soon and she can have that little brat back.” Her face gave a look of relief and at that moment, I could see the vulnerability in her, that same vulnerability I saw when we had first met.
“You have got to stop seeking revenge on Molly,” I told her. Her face changed into a snarl.
“That bitch!” she screamed. “Never! She ruined us Jake, she ruined me. We lost our fucking daughter because of her.”
“We lost our daughter because I wasn’t there for her and you were a drug pusher, Lucy,” I told her solemnly. She gave me a foul glare and for a moment I expected her to start one of her tirades, but then her mood shifted as she stared wide-eyed at me, expectantly. “What if I could make it all better?” I added. Her faced changed once more as a sadness and vulnerability overcame her demeanour.
“Could you Jake... could you really?” she sobbed.
“I’m leaving to go down South and I want you to come with me,” I asked her. Her eyes narrowed at my suggestion.
“Are you serious?” she almost begged.
“I want you to marry me. Lucy, will you marry me?”
She sat there for a moment with her mouth wide open, looking as if she’d just been told she had won the lottery. “W... w... why me?” she stuttered out. I leant across to kiss her gently on the cheek,
“Because you’re all that matters to me now,” I told her.
“Of course! Yes, I'll marry you, Jake, I’ve always loved you,” she squealed.
“And Molly?”
“Sod Molly, I got what I want.” I stayed for a couple of hours and we talked like two teenagers planning their future and that’s exactly what we were doing. Jake and Lucy; ‘The Untouchables’
It was late by the time I got home, so I poured myself a glass of Grouse and gave the balcony a miss as I set myself down on my sofa. I didn’t want to feel Daniel or anyone else tonight. Opening up my laptop, I loaded the video disc I had kept. I had been contemplating doing this for a long time, as I typed the title of my next masterpiece.
The Rape of a Sub-Editor
***
Chapter 24 - Daniel
Damn! Why don’t things ever work out the way you planned them? You would think that being dead, I’d have some advantage over the living. I can do things and see things they have absolutely no idea of and yet everything I try seems to turn to custard. Now, what’s with that?
First off it was that damnable woman, my delicious wife Molly, who screwed up my plans. I was certain that email would have gotten her fired and blacklisted by every reputable news outlet in Great Britain, if not the rest of Europe. But no! The slimy little worm managed to squirm her conniving way out of that one. Flash a bit of leg, a hint of tit, and Simon-bloody-Reynolds just about pole-vaults out of his damn chair to try to please her. God, she will be the death of me, metaphorically speaking of course. You know, I swear if Molly Sampson fell into a cess-pit, she’d still come up smelling of roses. Nope, something more direct and more drastic now needs to be done. I need to unsettle her enough to get her to open up, at least about what she knows about my death and what really happened on the top of that building that evening.
I was still reeling at the way she had conned old Reynolds, with her famous “come hither” eyes, tits and legs, but now she’s off bothering poor Becky. It seems like Molly may even have convinced Becky that Molly was the innocent party in all this and that she was happy to sacrifice her marriage for the greater good. Well, all I can say to that is, Molly has never sacrificed anything for anybody. It has always been about Molly, first, second, and third. For God’s sake, she even bribed Becky to get her on-side. I suppose in a way that wasn’t such a bad thing. I mean, I really did feel guilty about not providing for young Damien’s future, but I had taken care of that. Molly didn’t need to make this grand gesture – not that anyone knew that yet of course. God! My mind spun as I felt it was all getting so much more complicated. All I wanted was to find out was whether the two people I loved most in this world conspired to drop me from the top of that building, and now it seems like we have opened some enormous can of worms, creating a great big soap-opera for everyone to try to deal with.
Mind you, to be honest, Molly was the least of my worries right now. My biggest concern at the moment is Jake. I mean, what is the man thinking? Marry Lucy? That devious, drug-addled, little slut? Why in God’s holy name, would he do that? Sure, I can understand that he wants to run away from all this. Jake is an incredibly sensitive and caring person. He must have gone into a tailspin with everything that has happened these past few weeks. Though I had genuinely thought when we bonded the other night, when we experienced what it was like to become one, single, being, that Jake would be mine forever. I can’t believe he didn’t feel what I felt that night and I’m flabbergasted he’d even consider moving down South, let alone with that waste of space, Lucy. How long before she realises that his heart is not really in it? How long before she realises Jake will forever belong to me. I own him lock, stock, and two smoking barrels. Okay, so Jake doesn’t quite see that right now, but it is truth and eventually he will have to accept it.
My mind was still reeling as I considered Becky and Damien in this whole scenario. I needed to find a way to protect them from that predator, Molly. I just couldn’t let things go the way they are. Yes, Damien needed the Trust Fund, but Becky also needed to beware and fear Molly. Who knows what evil plans she has for her and my little boy, further down the road?
The entire drama was rapidly starting to overwhelm me. I had to do something and it had to be done now. But what? Once again, since my death, I found myself pondering on the ludicrousness of the situation I’m in. I’m trapped between two realities – between the living and the dead. I screamed at the nothingness that surrounds me. “GOD! SATAN! ANYONE! WHY THE HELL AM I HERE? PLEASE JUST TAKE ME WHEREVER I’M SUPPOSED TO GO! I’VE HAD ENOUGH! Do you understand? I’ve had enough and I just want to go home.
.. please... let me go home!” My scream tailed off, in absolute frustration and I wept inwardly at the complete and utter hopelessness of my situation.
Gathering myself together, I realised that whatever my purpose here is, I haven’t fulfilled it. Hence, I must carry on and find out what it is that I am supposed to be doing. Taking stock, the instant clarity of thought hit me like a thunderbolt out of the blue. I am still here for one reason and one reason alone. I am only half a soul. My other half still lives, breathes, and as it appears, loves , in the physical realm. I understood now. If I was to seek release, I must reunite our souls first.
With this exciting revelation, I suddenly felt pumped full of purpose and determination as I realised what I must do. My only problem was Jake planning a runner. I needed to stop that. Jake had to understand and face the truth, that we are intertwined for all eternity. One of us cannot leave the mortal realm without the other. Oh my God! Why didn’t I see it before? It’s all so bloody obvious. The solution lies in my own hands. Jake and I must become one. Jake must die, so we can both live forever, together, as one being. YES! That was it! Now it was time for action, time to make this happen!
***
There was to be no pussy-footing around this time. I had to be direct and bold in everything I did. No more leaving subtle clues or notes anymore. It was time to reveal myself in all my glory.
Jake, surprisingly, wasn’t on his balcony when I entered his apartment. He was still having his customary whisky, but he was sitting at his laptop, his face a picture of concentration and satisfaction as he pounded away at the keyboard with a grim intensity. Curious to see what he was so focused on I looked over his shoulder and chuckled as I read the first few lines. He was writing a story that would truly hang Molly out to dry. The journalism professor in me couldn’t help but admire the balanced, almost emotionless, tone of the article. Jake was describing what had happened to him, almost as a dispassionate observer, as any good journalist should. Ah, yes... that’s my boy, I thought.
I knew he could sense me standing there, as I noticed a grin cross his face and his eyes arch upward in a welcoming gesture. Right then, I knew that all was not lost with Jake and that he still felt the same way. Perhaps he was just running away with Lucy because he didn’t have the strength to face the truth. Well, that’s why I was here, to give him that strength... and I had bucketloads of it for him. Placing my hand gently on his shoulder I squeezed softly to gain his attention.
He rose from his seat and turned to face me. I sensed he could see me, it was written all over his face. I could see the love in his eyes. I wanted him to feel the emotions and sheer pleasure of reuniting as one being and this time, I needed him to be fully aware of what was happening. Slowly I pulled myself inside of him, just like before, gently wrapping my soul into his. Again, I felt that utter warmth and completeness as we became one being, but strangely I also felt Jake’s resistance, an unwillingness to completely unite with me. What on earth is wrong with you Jake? I know you want this just as much as me!
Ultimately, I was the stronger of the two of us and having completed the melding of body and soul, I again experienced the rush and orgasmic pleasure of our joining. I only hoped Jake had experienced this also, as I knew once he realised just how perfectly we fitted together, he would want this as much as me, forever. After the rush, I reluctantly pulled away from him and moved towards the sofa, hoping he would sit beside me.
His face reflected emotions I had not expected to see there. He looked bemused more than anything. He certainly didn’t appear to have experienced the complete perfection of what we had done, in the same way I had and that worried me. Jake moved over, taking a seat beside me. There was a determination and even perhaps a touch of anger that I had never seen in him before.
“Why Danny? Why?” that was all he uttered.
I smiled reassuringly at him. “Jake,” I began, “that was just a small taste of what we can experience together. You know in your heart that we are meant for each other. We are one-half of each other. Together, we make a whole.”
Jake started to laugh and I felt anger thrust itself through my system. I shouted at him, “Come on Jake, tell me you don’t feel it? Come on... just tell me!”
He looked at me and shook his head sadly. “No Danny, not anymore. Sure, I believed it once, just like you. God knows, I wanted you so badly... but that’s gone now Dan... it’s all gone. I love Lucy and we are going to make a life together, away from all this madness.”
I continued to harangue him. “Come on then, tell me you didn’t just experience the greatest orgasm of your life. Tell me you didn’t feel my entire soul and the rightness of our union.” Furious, I added, more in spite than anything else. “You can’t feel any of that with that pathetic creature Lucy. God Jake, she’s had so many men she probably has nothing left down there to feel. Jake, come on buddy... you know it’s true.”
His forehead wrinkled in pain at my attack on Lucy, but he kept his voice soft and level. “No Danny, I love Lucy and I would have thought that you, of all people, would understand that love has absolutely nothing to do with sex. Please respect our decision, Daniel.”
It was a long time since Jake had last called me Daniel and it cut me to the quick. Shaking my head furiously, I couldn’t believe the words that had come from his mouth. “Jake...” I began hesitantly, but then a red mist descended and I stood up, my spectral frame towering over him. “Jake, we will be together. I have decided and that is that. We belong together Jake... you know we do.”
He continued to stare up at me, his eyes filled with sadness. “Sorry Danny boy, it ain’t gonna happen. It’s a new life for me... for Lucy and me. Look, mate, I have no idea why you’re still here. Just go to wherever it is you’re supposed to go and let us get on with our lives.” He stared at me with a look of disgust. “You’re dead Daniel... just go and stay dead, please. I’ve had enough of you.”
I spat out my final words to him, before disappearing from his apartment. “We will be united Jake and there’s only one way that can happen... now isn’t there? Just think on that Jakey boy... just think on it. This ain’t over!”
***
When I left Jake’s apartment my head was reeling.
It didn’t matter which way I looked at it, this madness that Jake spoke of, Lucy, Becky, and all the drama associated with it came down to just one person... MOLLY!
Without her fucking with everyone's lives to suit her own twisted desires, none of this madness would exist, and Jake would have been totally receptive to my thoughts and my needs. Damn you woman! It’s time to sort you out once and for all and no more subtlety with you either, girl. It’s time to feel the wrath of Daniel in all its power and destructiveness.
I’m coming for you, my precious, little, bitch!
***
Chapter 25 - Molly
I had just sat down to start a new article, but my mind was spinning. I had only arrived at work an hour earlier, coming straight from my doctor. I had put off getting tested after Jake had told me he was HIV positive. To be honest it was easier to put it to the back of mind, pretend it had never happened.
It had only taken twenty-four hours for the test results to turn-around and my doctor had called me on the way to work this morning, asking me to come straight into his office. That wasn’t a good sign. Sitting in front of him, I felt like a school child as he chastised me for being irresponsible. Little did he know how much of a fool I had truly been, with my actions. I felt remorse, for myself, and for Jake. What I had done to him was unforgivable. I wasn’t sure, now, if I could ever go back.
“You’re not pregnant Molly,” the Doctor had said seriously. My heart jumped in both relief and sorrow. Whilst my intention with Jake that evening had been to conceive a child, looking back now, I realised it was a foolish idea and given all that followed, even more so. I was relieved we had not conceived a child who would be at risk of contracting HIV. Perhaps I really was finally getting a sense of morality? I thou
ght to myself. No, I knew in my heart that having a child would also make my life a whole lot harder, HIV or not. It was for the best that I wasn’t pregnant. I was being selfish once again.
I was getting impatient waiting for him to come out with the really important result that may change my life forever. He was prattling on about the test and how it was administered. As I tapped my foot on the floor impatiently, I leant forward, cutting him off mid-sentence, “the results Doc... the results?” He looked at me a little shocked at my brazen outburst. “Sorry Doctor, I just need to know.”
“Molly, you don’t have HIV.” I breathed a sigh of relief and felt the world spin as an overwhelming release washed over me. “But...” he continued. “... I do have to say that these results are strange.” He clicked his tongue.
“Strange?” I don’t understand.
“You said you were told your partner had HIV?” he asked.
“Yes...” I replied, unsure of where he was going.
“Are you sure he was telling the truth?”
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