Second Chance Ranch (The Circle D series)

by Harders, Audra

  She pinched between her brows and closed her eyes. Lord, what’s wrong with me? Why am I stabbing at Zac? Why can’t I just ignore his pokes and be happy he’s agreed to help Carli?

  Jen sat in her truck refusing to let the tears fall. She’d had no choice twelve years ago. Her daughter had a better life than she could’ve given her. She and Zac lived their lives exactly as they wanted to.

  She’d done the right thing. She’d done the right thing. She’d done the right thing.

  Slamming the palm of her free hand on the steering wheel, Jen released her pinch and opened her eyes. Zac had moved on; she’d been left to deal with the pregnancy by herself; she’d couldn’t have faced her father, knowing how disappointed in her he would’ve been. All her reasons remained as solid as the day she’d decided she knew what was best for the baby. Zac had no right to judge her.

  She shoved the door open, grabbed her folder and slid out of the truck. No regrets. The past remained behind her, and she needed to look to the future. A future of sharing love and hope with those who needed it most.

  “Jennifer, there you are. We were wondering if you were going to make it this morning.” Grace Davidson stood on the back porch wiping a coffee mug with a dish towel. “C’mon in, I just set a pot to brewin’.”

  Jen forced a smile and once in place, relief spread through her. Grace had always been like a mother to her. She loved Grace — no matter what her son was up to. “Great. I’m up for coffee anytime.”

  “And my apple crisp? Gabe just got back from Grand Junction with a couple of bushels of apples. Couldn’t wait to bake with them.”

  The aroma gave away the treat even if Grace hadn’t said anything about it. Jen followed her through the door and into the kitchen. “Martin, you’re looking fit this morning.” Jen hooked her purse strap over the coat hook.

  Martin Davidson sat at the oak kitchen table, a pair of tortoise-shell reading glasses perched on the bridge of his nose and a copy of Cattlemen’s Quarterly open beneath the heel of his sturdy palm. “Jennifer, glad you made it. I was about to head to the shop. Thought you’d forgotten about us.”

  “Never. Sorry I’m late.” She’d been waiting for Zac to show up and get to work before she left. Zac never showed and she couldn’t wait any longer. She prayed the whole way over she wouldn’t pass him on the road. “Especially when I need your advice so badly. Thanks for looking over my business plan.”

  “Seems to me you’re doing a fine job yourself.” Martin lifted his cup and winced after taking a swallow. “I’ll never get used to tea.”

  “Coffee helped get you your heart attack. One cup a day is what Doc O’Reilly says. I turn a blind eye on the second cup you sneak after supper.” Grace winked at Jen. “Now don’t go telling your dad that.”

  “I’d never tattle. I love you guys too much.” Warmth swelled through her simply acknowledging how much the Davidsons meant to her. They’d been there for her when her mother died and wrapped her and her brother in support, especially when her dad grieved in his own way—a way that didn’t include comforting his own children. “Not to worry. Dad builds fudge factor into his directions.”

  Grace laughed. “Always good to have a medical expert in the family.” She gave Jen a sideways glance. “I had hopes we’d get one, too. That Zac let a real peach slip through his hands when he let you go. Funny, the way you two got along, I thought he’d be the first to get married and give us babies. Never thought our first grandchildren would come from Gabe.”

  What about my family? Acid burned in her belly as Zac’s words from a few evenings back plagued her. His family. The family that loved her, too. Jen ground her teeth as her conscience tore at her heart. Why now, Lord? Why is everything erupting around me now? The longing in Grace’s voice made Jen want to cry. Over the past couple of days, everything made her cry.

  Maybe that’s what she needed. A good dam-buster of a cry. Get it all out of her system, then maybe she’d deal with the camp, the ranch, the possible transplant. She folded her hands on her lap to keep them from shaking. Lord, help me keep it together, just for a little while longer.

  Martin scooped up the folder Jen had set on the table and flipped through her papers. “Mellie’s doing a good job of catching up. A grandson she raised proper and a pair of granddaughters on the way. Count your blessings Grace, not your years.” He pulled out the sheet of graph paper she’d redrawn her boundaries on. “Looks pretty true to life here, Jennifer. Glad you thought to look at the lay of the land instead of just going off of the record maps. Topography changes over time. They’ll be making their own revisions,” — he held up the sheet and shook it — “but seeing you beat them to it will make the surveyors, and the loan folks, pretty happy.”

  Martin’s praise only made her stomach hurt worse. She wouldn’t have thought of it if Zac hadn’t mentioned the boundary discrepancies to her. “Zac pointed that out to me the other day.”

  “Makes sense he’d want you to get it right. No one loves that land more than Zac, and no one knows it better.” He shuffled the papers together with the budget page on top. “Arthur Eklund did a good thing when he wrote you into his will, Jennifer. That ranch needs a loving touch and a useful purpose. It hasn’t been farmed to its potential in years. It’ll be rough going at first, but with a good crop plan and solid funding for that camp, you’ll be on top of things in no time.” He tapped on the sheet. “Now, looks like we’ve got to get more realistic with these numbers. Just because Eklund guaranteed a below market price for you, doesn’t mean the deal is sealed. Nothing drives the money guys crazier than an application with pie in the sky figures. We’ll work this through then have Zac look at it.”

  Zac? “I don’t want to bother him. He’s got enough on his mind already.” More than you’ll know.

  “Never you mind Zac’s time.” Martin gave her the one eye over the top of his glasses. “The Circle D pays him to be on top of our numbers. It’s in the best interest of the Circle D that we have good neighbors. The Trails’ End used to be part of the Circle D, you know.”

  Grace leaned her hip against the table and sighed. “That place used to scare the goodness out of me. Zac spent so much time out there exploring the caves and mine shafts with Jess, I was certain they’d fall into one. Oh my, oh my. I prayed up a storm for the good Lord to send a legion of angels to watch over those boys.”

  “I don’t remember Kade ever mentioning the caves.” Happy memories of the three of them exploring anything that came their way wove through her mind. The mention of Jess shot her thoughts to dust. “Zac didn’t either.”

  “Zac spent less time over at the Trails’ End when we took you and your brother in while your dad took care of your mom. Kade and Zac began roping together during that time and he only went over to the Trails’ End when Jess called.”

  Grace slid a steaming cup of coffee in front of Jen and laughed. “I remember the scuffed up hands when the boys decided they wanted to make a go of the roping. I didn’t think Kade would have any fingers left. That rope took its measure of skin.”

  Martin chuckled and laid the papers down. “Yep, good for the boys. They learned to keep their fingers and thumbs tucked in close.”

  Jen gave Martin a half-hearted grin. Zac learned to nimbly keep his hands in one piece. A skill he aptly applied to more facets of his life that included protecting his heart while leaving a trail of shattered dreams behind him.

  Jen grabbed the mug and took a careful sip. She indicated the papers as she set the coffee back down. “Martin, where do we start?”

  * * *

  “Hand me the breaker bar.”

  Zac grabbed the long bar from the bench and placed the end in Gabe’s open palm. “Why’d you crank these bolts down so tight?”

  “Guess I didn’t know my own strength.” Gabe shot Zac a look before fitting the socket into place. With the added length, he gripped the handle and pulled a couple of times until the nut broke free. “Shouldn’t you be haying your own place instead o
f helping me change the blades on my equipment?”

  Ignoring the sarcasm, Zac picked the nut from the ground and dropped it into the tool box drawer. “I’m trying to work a deal here. I help you, you help me. I can’t sit on Eklund’s equipment for another minute. The things rattle around the fields until I can’t stand straight anymore. I need to use one of our swathers.” Zac glanced past the line of engine parts and replacement fittings neatly stacked on shelves. His cousin, Hank and their barn manager Manny, could tear apart anything broken and fix it better than new with the proverbial baling twine and fence wire. Or course, having the right parts was always a plus.

  He looked out the window of the barn at the equipment yard and spotted their old John Deere. “How about Ernie?”

  “Are you crazy? We’ve got our own fields to cut, I need all the equipment the Circle D has running.” Gabe broke another nut free. “Besides, I like driving Ernie. Good machine; dependable.” He fit the socket around another nut. “Start thinking like a responsible rancher, Zac. Go buy your own equipment.”

  “After harvest. Right now, I have to work any angle possible to sooth aching muscles and retain the ability to sit.”

  Gabe laughed as he handed Zac another nut. “Sitting is highly overrated.”

  “I’ll be the judge of that.” Zac tossed it in the tool box and helped Gabe reach the next set of blades. “Speaking of aching muscles, how’s Melanie doing? She looked pretty tired the other night.”

  “Good days and bad. Glad we’re not in the heat of the summer. She tends to get a bit cranky when it’s hot. Hand me another blade.”

  Zac did as he was asked. “She sounds excited about having twins.”

  “Yeah, after raising Jason by herself while finishing school, she says looking after two babies at one time will be a piece of cake. Mel and Mom have made more plans than I can listen to. Dad, Jason and I spend a lot of time out here in the barn while they’re talking colors and cribs and all sorts of other stuff.”

  Zac stared at the blade Gabe eased in place. “Jason fits right in, doesn’t he?”

  “I love the kid. He’s smart and funny. I’m proud to call him my son.”

  “You’ve adopted him?”

  “When the twins are born, we’ll be one big happy family.”

  One big happy family. Zac resisted the impending snort. Jennifer didn’t think enough of him to share her life. It hadn’t been easy for twenty-something Melanie to raise her son alone, but she did it. If something matters enough, you make it work. Obviously, being part of a family didn’t matter to Jen. She chose the easy way out.

  “Zac!”

  “What?”

  “If you’re going to stand there, hand me the wrench. I can’t position the turtles and fasten the blade back in place without it.”

  Zac glanced at the line of dome-shaped fasteners on the head. He hated changing blades. Torn open more jeans at the knee while working on them than he could count. He handed off the tool and stepped back. “Hurry up and show me what I can drive so my backside doesn’t feel whooped.”

  Gabe gave the nut a final shove, laid the wrench on the ground beside the next set and stood up. “You know you’ve probably only got a good two weeks before the snow flies, and that’s pushing it.”

  “Not a problem. Jess had Max cutting the lower belt and Splint’s raking the rows. With the proper equipment, I shouldn’t have much of a problem finishing up in a few days.” He slapped the dirt from his jeans as they walked toward the door. “That’s a lot of hay to bring in, but we’ll do it. Nothing like seeing the crop put the ranch in the black.”

  Gabe reached for the door handle. “Is it true you have a back-up contract on the place?”

  “It’s just a back-up contract. There is a chance Jen won’t meet the criteria and the sale will open up again. I don’t want the Trails’ End falling into an outsider’s hands.”

  “Does ‘outsider’ include Jennifer O’Reilly?”

  The joy of anticipating a good harvest turned sour at the mention of her name. “Last time I looked, she wasn’t a Davidson.”

  “The last time you looked, Jen was a teenager.”

  Zac didn’t want to revisit the argument. He’d had enough of that a few nights ago. Jen had been honest, she’d made it clear she hadn’t wanted to marry him. That truth stung, but not anything he couldn’t get over. They’d been an item, now they weren’t. What more did she want from him?

  A cool draft through the barn reminded him nice weather was running short. Great day to be working and what was he doing? Wasting time convincing his brother to loan him equipment. The angry thought evaporated as soon as the words gelled in his brain. He’d spent an hour talking with Gabe — alone — a feat he’d not been able to accomplish in all the days he’d been home without Grace or Martin inviting themselves into the conversation. He loved his folks, but it was nice not having someone tell him what to do. Gabe tended to listen, letting folks come to their conclusions.

  Zac smacked his brother on the shoulder and indicated the door. “Let’s go out and see what equipment you can spare. I’d like to get the job done while the sun’s still shining.”

  “Patience, little brother.” Gabe eased the door open and ambled through it like a stroll along a mountain trail. “Besides, anything I can spare will probably, at the very least, need an oil change. Let’s look things over.”

  Zac shook his head, amazed Gabe ever got anything done. “Make hay while the sun’s still shining,” he muttered.

  Gabe laughed. “Yeah, something like that.”

  They stepped through the barn door and squinted at the bright sunshine. It took a moment for his eyes to adjust as he looked across the corrals. His mom and dad stood next to the gate with Melanie laughing beside them. Right next to her stood Jennifer, her slim figure a dramatic contrast to Melanie’s well-rounded form.

  Not the only contrast he’d noticed recently. Melanie grabbed whatever the world shot at her and worked the situations until they shined despite the gloom surrounding her. She’d kept her child, not caring what anyone thought of her. She accepted the consequences and God blessed her for her faithfulness.

  I never would’ve held you back. Jen’s words mocked him with their double-edged meaning.

  All those years he’d read Jen wrong. He’d imagined the noble in her, not realizing she’d supported him at her convenience, biding her time until he left.

  He’d read her wrong before. It wouldn’t happen again.

  CHAPTER NINE

  “Do my shoes match?”

  Melanie waddled up to them as Jen stood by the corral fence with Grace and Martin. Slip-on shoes had replaced the hiking boots covering tanned feet and swollen ankles. “The shoes are fine, but you need to prop those feet up before your ankles burst.”

  Melanie twisted one way, and then the other trying to view her ankles. “I thought I heard sloshing, but hey, who’da thought it would be me?”

  Her throaty laugh infected them all and Jen relaxed. Melanie had a problem with edema, a medical condition common to pregnant women, but knew enough to take care of it. Martin gave Mel a hug and helped her sit on the edge of a hay bunk that hadn’t been moved into the corral yet. Jen knelt down and inspected the ankles in question, satisfied the puffy, yet firm flesh wasn’t a warning. Drawn into the joy and expectancy of the birth due in the next few weeks, she laughed at the jokes Melanie pointed at herself. She’d liked Melanie from the moment she showed up in town and gave thanks to God that someone had finally saved Gabe from his workaholic self.

  “The gals are all worked up today.” She rubbed her belly as if trying to comfort the babies. “Grace, I have a feeling raising those three boys of yours was a cake walk compared to what I’m in for.”

  Memories of her own pregnancy engulfed her as Jen fought to bite her tongue. She’d lasted the entire nine months without sharing the experience with her family. The first flutter deep within her womb; the first time she saw a little elbow poke at her belly, the first con
traction signaling her daughter was ready to meet the world.

  Using the laughter of the moment to camouflage her watery eyes, she looked up and spied Gabe and Zac coming out of the barn. She met Zac’s gaze and all of a sudden she wanted to share the months of her pregnancy with him, to wipe away the loneliness in her soul and replace it with the joyful miracle of life. He held her gaze as he drew closer, the boyish face of twelve year ago replaced by a handsome ruggedness and a curious dose of maturity. The intensity of his gaze bored through her with the power of a magnetic resonance imaging machine. Jen turned back, forced a chuckle at Melanie’s continuing story, and tried to collect her scattered wits. Was she so distraught over the thought of babies and family and sickness and health, she’d begun hallucinating a happily ever after with the only person she’d made certain she could never have it with? What did she see in Zac’s eyes? Remorse? Forgiveness? Love?

  More like anger, hurt…resentment.

  “Boys, about time you emerged from the barn,” Martin called as he waved them over. “I’m the luckiest man alive surrounded by these beauties.”

  “You’re a lucky man, Dad, but I hate to burst your bubble.” Gabe came around and wrapped his arm around his wife’s shoulders. “This beauty is mine.”

  Melanie grinned. “There’s enough of me to go around.”

  “No way. You’re mine, all mine.” He bent over and kissed her ear earning a squeal from Melanie. “Dad’s got his hands full with Mom.”

  “Don’t I know it.” Martin gave Grace an affectionate squeeze. “Kept me in line all these years whether I liked it or not.”

  “Oh, go on.” Grace bumped Martin with her elbow, glowing at his attention. “You thought you could get away from me with that heart attack, but the good Lord had other plans. You’re stuck with me, Martin Davidson, till death do us part…‘almost’ doesn’t count.”