Wasted

by Suzannah Daniels

  “Damn, you’re beautiful,” I whispered as I reached out and squeezed her breast.

  She answered with a moan as I shifted within her. It was all the encouragement I needed to know that she was ready. Stimulating her with my thumb, I continued my pace until she visibly squirmed beneath my touch. Wrapping my arm around her waist, I pulled her closer to me, and she wrapped her legs around my torso. I drove into her and withdrew, over and over until we reached a frenzied crescendo and her cries of pleasure filled the silence. With a final thrust, burying myself deep inside of her, I convulsed with my own orgasm.

  Her hooded eyes slowly opened, and her lips curved into a smile.

  Breathing hard, I withdrew and retreated to the bathroom. When I returned, I slid under the cover and pulled her back against my chest, her bare ass nestled against me. I was already hardening, and I pressed my growing erection against her rump and whispered, “You’re already making me hard again. You ready for round two?”

  “Round two?” she asked, surprise in her voice.

  “I’s just messing with ya,” I whispered, amusement in my voice. “Sort of.”

  I caressed the side of her waist and the flare of her hip. “What is it about you that I can’t resist?”

  “My poisonous berries?”

  I chuckled. “You got some poisonous berries, all right. One taste and a man’s addicted for life.”

  As we lay entangled, my eyes began drifting. Sleep had almost claimed me when I heard her soft voice.

  “What would you say if…I told you that I was in love with you?”

  My blood froze in my veins, and a sickening feeling cascaded through my body—not because she thought she loved me. I had to admit that a huge part of me was thrilled that she felt that way about me.

  But she didn’t know all my secrets, and if she did, would she love me then?

  “Mason?”

  I closed my eyes, unable to respond. I wanted her, and I was just selfish enough that I didn’t want anyone else to have her. But love?

  Love had a way of making everything better and worse at the same time. It made the stakes higher, the falls harder.

  Realizing I hadn’t answered her question, I feigned sleep. I’d just complicated our relationship, and I didn’t know which scared me more, hurting her or getting hurt.

  She gently laid her hand on top of mine as if she were afraid of waking me. “Good night,” she whispered into the shadows.

  Silently chastising myself, I waited for her to fall asleep. I was a freaking idiot. All I’d been able to think about was how much I wanted her. I hadn’t stopped long enough to think about how it might affect her, and no matter how the situation went down at this point, I would look like an opportunistic ass. Hell, maybe I was.

  Thirty minutes later when she finally fell asleep, I pulled on my pants and slipped out of the room.

  I was in a vicious circle, and I had a bottle of whiskey calling my name.

  Chapter 15

  Hair of the Dog

  Lexi

  When I woke up, my brain instantly rehashed the events of last night with mind-numbing clarity. So much for waiting to have sex. Seeing Kevin had been a horrible reminder of how quickly my perfect world could collapse, leaving me devastated and lonely.

  Mason’s gentle manner comforted me, and it solidified feelings that I’d been experiencing with him. I knew he wasn’t perfect, but I had faults of my own. Besides, I didn’t care how perfect he was or wasn’t when he was near. All I knew was that I felt better when I was in his presence. The world was a little less lonely, a little happier.

  Smiling, I turned over, expecting to see him behind me, still asleep after his long shift the previous evening.

  The bed was empty.

  Hoping that he had gotten up early to make breakfast, I slipped on some clothes and went to the kitchen. As I walked down the hall, I realized that the house was quiet.

  Haley must still be asleep. Had Mason left? Or maybe they’d left together. Maybe they’d left a note in the living room.

  One glance told me that no one was in the kitchen. I smelled Mason before I saw him. He reeked of whiskey.

  Wearing only his jeans, he lay on his side, his hair pulled into a short ponytail. Why had he felt the need to get up and drink?

  Remembering the last thing I’d said to him, I realized that he hadn’t been asleep. He’d heard me. I was sure of it. I closed my eyes, cursing myself for saying something that I knew he may not be ready to hear.

  Feeling like a complete moron, I headed back to my room to get my purse and my car keys. I needed some air.

  As I approached my bedroom, Haley opened the door to Mason’s room.

  Her face lit up. “Good morning!”

  “Morning,” I greeted her with as much enthusiasm as I could muster, considering I’d just made a fool of myself with her brother.

  “Have you and Mason had breakfast yet?”

  “No. I just got up, and Mason’s passed out on the couch.”

  Her pretty features contorted into a look of confusion. “He is?”

  “Yeah, I guess he couldn’t sleep.”

  “You want to go get some breakfast?” his sister asked. “We can bring him something back.”

  I really wanted to be alone, but I hated to let Haley down. Mason certainly wouldn’t be much company this morning.

  “Sure.”

  Ten minutes later, we slipped out the front door, and Mason hadn’t budged. We found a local restaurant known for its pancakes and placed our order.

  Haley scooted to the edge of her booth seat. “Mason used to bring me here when we were teenagers.”

  “Your mom didn’t come?”

  Haley shook her head vehemently. “Oh, no. She was usually drunk or out with one of her men.”

  Thinking about my own parents, I felt sorry for Haley. My parents had always made me their top priority, and I had trouble imagining what it must be like to be raised the way they had been.

  “That was nice of Mason to watch out for you.”

  “He was working at a fast food joint making minimum wage at the time, so we drank water and ordered a cheap stack of plain pancakes. But looking back, those are some of the happiest memories of my childhood. My friends’ brothers wouldn’t be caught dead out with their sisters, but it never seemed to bother Mason.”

  Admiration filled her voice, and a twinge of jealousy seeped into my soul. I had always imagined having a close relationship with a sibling, but even though my parents had tried, they hadn’t been able to conceive another child.

  “Y’all are lucky to have each other.”

  She took a deep breath, unwrapping her silverware before her gaze lifted to my face. “Yeah, we are.”

  Haley blew out a breath. “Mason’s protective. That’s why I didn’t want you to say anything to him about our mother showing up on his doorstep. She takes advantage of him.”

  “It’s hard for him to think she’s in need of something.”

  Haley nodded. “I know, but sometimes the more you give someone, the more they take. And she’ll just take and take from Mason until he has nothing left. He needs to start putting himself first.”

  The corners of my mouth turned up as I thought about Mason. “I know you’re right, but I think that’s part of his appeal. There’s definitely something attractive about a man who wants to take care of the people in his life.” I thought about the day that we goofed off in the cave and gave a shrug. “I don’t know. I guess that’s something that goes back to primal instincts.”

  Haley reached across the table and touched my hand. “No, I agree with you. It’s a nice quality to find in a guy, but my mother should want to take care of him, too. You know what I mean? It should be give and take.”

  “Yeah, I know what you mean. Has your mother ever tried rehab?”

  Haley rolled her eyes. “A half a dozen times. You can’t make someone quit who doesn’t want to.”

  I had no experience with addictive behaviors
, but I knew she was right. “Yeah, makes sense.”

  “I worry about Mason, too. He drinks more than he used to. I think he’d slow down if he were in a serious relationship, but ever since the divorce, he’s been on a runaway train, barreling down the I-don’t-give-a-shit fast track.”

  “The divorce? You mean he was married?”

  “He didn’t tell you?”

  I shook my head, watching her with my full attention.

  “Oh.”

  The waitress delivered our pancakes, and impatient, I wished she’d hurry up, so we could continue our conversation. What else did I not know about Mason? When she finally went away, relief flowed through me and so did the questions.

  “How long has it been since he divorced?”

  Haley gritted her teeth and drew in a breath. “I don’t know if I should be the one telling you this. Mason’s a pretty private guy.”

  “You can’t leave me hanging. Please, tell me,” I implored, eager to know information that might help me understand him.

  “I wish I could, but….”

  “I’m falling for him, Haley.” Blunt, but effective. The stunned look on her face let me know that she’d heard me.

  “Falling for him? As in you want more than a brief relationship?”

  I concentrated on cutting my pancakes. “Am I wasting my time?” I didn’t look at her as I asked the question, afraid of what I might see.

  “I don’t know.”

  At least she wasn’t giving me false hope. Wondering if I should have kept that information to myself, I took a bite of my pancakes, unable to enjoy them for all the uncertainty that swirled in my chest.

  “Mason’s dealing with a lot of stuff—unresolved emotions, our insane mother, things he should be the one to tell you about.”

  “I get it.” I understood that she didn’t want to give me details, but I also realized that Mason had a lot of things he hadn’t even mentioned. How well could I possibly know him? Maybe I was getting ahead of myself with my feelings, not that I knew how to stop them.

  “For the record, I think he needs someone like you. I don’t know if he’s ready, but,” she paused, “I guess that’s where you come in. Maybe he needs you, and he doesn’t even know it. He probably won’t be an easy catch because he has a bad habit of shutting people out. You’ll have to decide whether a real relationship with him is something you want to pursue because I don’t think he’ll make it easy.”

  She held her hands up in surrender. “Okay, enough talk about Mason. As his sister, this conversation is starting to creep me out.”

  Did I want to pursue a relationship with Mason? In all my previous relationships, it was the guy who’d pursued me.

  When I thought about the way he smiled at me, the way he wanted to protect those around him, the way I felt when I was near him, I knew I had to find out if there was the potential for a long-term relationship.

  If someone had asked me a few weeks ago whether I was coming to Creekview to pursue a relationship with a guy I met in a bar, I would have laughed at the absurdity of it.

  But as I sat here thinking about all the times he’d made me laugh, all the times his touch had filled me with a strange mixture of longing and contentment, all the times that I’d admired the way he fiercely protected those who were close to him….

  I wanted to be there for him, to give him happiness, to provide him comfort. I wanted to listen to his story—all of it—even the parts he was reluctant to share.

  So as I posed the question to myself of whether he was worth pursuing, I knew the answer. While I couldn’t be sure of the man I would find hidden beneath his veil of pain, hidden behind his easy smile, I had already committed to finding out. I wasn’t sure exactly when I had committed myself, but I had done it nonetheless.

  Now the only question was: would I like what I found?

  Mason

  I woke up with a screaming headache. Stumbling into the kitchen, I opened the cabinet in search of some aspirin. Instead, I found canned goods neatly stacked, all the labels turned to the front where they could easily be read. Boxes of rice and pasta were arranged in rows on the shelf above it. Damn, it looked like the stock crew from the grocery store broke into my apartment last night and stocked the shelves. I opened another cabinet, only to find that the height of the shelves had been rearranged and boxes of cereal were lined up neatly on the top shelf, while the lower shelves held boxes of oatmeal, a loaf of bread, and bagels.

  Shit. Who knew where the aspirin was? I closed the cabinet and started glancing at bottles of alcohol, wondering if I had the ingredients for Hair of the Dog.

  When I heard the front door open, I leaned against the counter, pressing my fingertips to my temples. Lexi’s and Haley’s voices mingled together as they carried on a lively conversation.

  “Which one of you ladies hid my aspirin?”

  They both looked at me, and Lexi set her purse on the coffee table and rushed toward me, carrying a to-go container. She laid it on the bar. “Here’re some pancakes if you want some breakfast.”

  “All I want right now is some aspirin and a glass of water.”

  She walked around the bar and into the kitchen, opening a cabinet and pulling out a bottle. “I put all the medicine in this cabinet.” She opened the bottle, poured out a couple of pills, and offered them to me. After replacing the bottle of aspirin, she busied herself fixing a glass of water and handed it to me, breaking her own rule about helping someone only once with a hangover.

  “Thank you, love.” It was nice having someone around who was willing to do things for me, but last night had scared me.

  Lexi and Haley shared a glance, and I had the distinct feeling they knew something that I didn’t.

  “Well, I’m going to pack my stuff. I need to get back home.” My sister looked at me as she spoke.

  “You’re leaving so soon?” Lexi asked.

  “Yeah, I need to wash clothes and start looking for a job.”

  “Remember,” I said, pointing at Haley, “you can stay here if you need to.”

  She smoothed her hair over her shoulder, reminding me of a younger version of our mother. “I know.” Then, she disappeared down the hall.

  As I made my way back to the couch, Lexi followed me, sinking into the adjacent cushion. “Listen. About last night….”’

  I held my hand up to stop her. “We both got a little carried away. There’s no need to discuss it.” The last thing I wanted to think about were the words she’d whispered right before she drifted to sleep.

  She cast her eyes downward. “I think we need to talk.”

  “I’ve got a freaking nightmare of a hangover right now, Lex.”

  “Okay. I guess I’ll just be in my room, then.”

  Dejected, she got up without so much as another glance my way and walked down the hall.

  I hated myself for hurting her, but last night had made it clear to me that she wanted something that I had no business giving her.

  My life was in shambles, and she had everything going for her. If she had any sense, she’d pack up her belongings and get the hell out of Creekview.

  But then I thought about the guy that she had intended to marry. A myriad of feelings and emotions tugged at my heart. When he came into the bar, I wanted to punch him in the throat, to tell him to get the hell away from her. He’d hurt her badly, and I was terrified that I was no better, that in the end she’d wind up hating me.

  But the thought of not being near her, of stepping back, giving another man the chance to claim her as his own…. I rubbed my hands together, so that I didn’t curl them into fists.

  I’d loved and left my share of women, but none of them had consumed my mind the way Lexi had. She left me wanting more.

  But did I have the courage to let her in?

  Chapter 16

  The Showstopper

  Mason

  Over the next week and a half, I distanced myself from Lexi. It wasn’t easy because my brain refused to purge her from
its thoughts. Everything I looked at in my apartment reminded me of her: the dust-free furniture, the neatly arranged groceries, the breakfast that I usually found waiting on me at the bar.

  It was nice having her around. I wanted to tell her that, but shit, I couldn’t let her think that the two of us had a chance. She was a nice girl, and I refused to do that to her. Hell, I’d done too much already. I knew I should have never slept with her, but I’d wanted her badly. I constantly thought back to that one night. I knew for Lexi I’d been more than the means to an orgasm. Our time together had meant something to her. She’d told me as much once it was over, and even though it had been something special to me, too, I wasn’t sure what exactly.

  All I knew was that she tormented me. Life was so much easier before she showed up at Spanky’s.

  I’d been spending more and more time away from the apartment, a lot of it at the gym working out my frustrations, and today had been no exception. Our shift would start soon, though, and I had just enough time to go back and catch a nap before heading to the bar.

  She was vacuuming when I entered the apartment. She didn’t acknowledge my arrival, and I assumed she hadn’t heard the door open over the loud hum that filled the apartment.

  I couldn’t keep myself from watching her, her ponytail swaying with her movement. Once she turned around, she graced me with one of her angelic smiles, the kind that made a man know that she was genuinely glad to see him.

  Turning the vacuum off, she gave me a little wave. “Hi.”

  “Hey, Lex.” As I walked past her, I fished my phone out of my pocket and set the alarm to give me enough time to get ready for work.

  A few minutes later, she knocked on my door.