The Lizard War

by Jack Patton

  “Nearly there,” said Spike, making Max jump.

  “Where?” Max asked.

  “You’ll see.”

  Ahead of them was a patch of bright sunlight between the trees. Max wondered if it was the edge of the forest. There was a humming sound in the air, which was getting louder as they galloped closer.

  Spike scurried around an enormous, thorny bush, and suddenly they were in a large clearing. The sunlight slanted through the trees onto a wide-open space the size of a football field. Flying insects hung in the damp air, buzzing noisily. All over the ground, and on rotting tree trunks and branches, hundreds of enormous beetles, spiders, centipedes, and wood lice crawled, slithered, and scuttled.

  Max gasped in surprise. Everywhere he looked there were giant bugs. It was as if the old encyclopedia his mom gave him had come to life!

  “Here we are,” Spike said cheerfully, picking Max off his back and placing him on the earthy forest floor.

  Max rubbed his eyes in wonder. He’d never seen so many different kinds of bugs in one place. There were insects from all over the world! As he stared, a line of army ants from South America marched past him, moving in unison. Max wasn’t surprised, because he knew that army ants were always working together in the wild. They even built nests and bridges using their own bodies by holding on to one another, just like circus performers making a pyramid. Max had seen them in books and on TV, but he’d always wanted to go to South America and see them for himself.

  “What’s that?” asked one of the ants as it passed, waving its feelers in Max’s direction.

  The other army ants turned to look.

  “Looks like a hairy worm,” said one.

  “Might be tasty,” said another.

  “Silence in the ranks!” snapped one of the bigger ants.

  Max raced after Spike, who had scuttled ahead. The army ants were huge. If they decided to eat him, he wouldn’t stand a chance!

  The damp air was full of the buzz of bees, the whirr of wings, and the whine of mosquitoes, which sounded as loud as sirens to Max’s tiny ears.

  Just ahead of them, the forest floor seemed to be shaking. Suddenly, with a pop, the ground exploded, and soil and sand rained down on them.

  Earthquake! was Max’s first thought. But before he could move, four thick, hairy black legs emerged out of a hidden tunnel in the soil. Eight black eyes glistened as four more legs and a huge, round body emerged from the burrow.

  A trap-door spider, Max realized with a gulp. Bugs Weekly had featured them in a venomous species special. “Fast, aggressive, and full of deadly venom,” it had said, “with powerful jaws and sharp fangs, which they use to stab downward into their prey. They can also run extremely fast.”

  He flung his arms over his head and shut his eyes, waiting for the spider to attack.

  But instead, Max heard Spike’s scratchy voice. “Hello, Webster,” he said.

  “H-hello, Spike,” came a quiet voice, almost a whisper. “Sorry, d-did I make you jump?”

  Max crept close to one of Spike’s back legs and tried to make himself as small as possible. But the trap-door spider had seen him. “W-w-w-what’s that?” he asked, pointing a thick leg at Max. Max shrank back even farther.

  “Oh, that? That’s Max,” Spike said, using his tail to point at him. “Don’t worry, he’s not a lizard. He’s a human bean.”

  “Being,” Max interrupted cautiously.

  “What?” said Spike.

  “I’m a human being.”

  “Yes, yes,” said Spike, turning back to the trap-door spider. “And that stuff on the top of his head is called hair.”

  “H-hello, Max,” said the spider. If he hadn’t been an enormous, venomous beast, Max would have thought that he sounded shy.

  “Hello, Webster,” Max said. The spider bared his knife-sharp fangs. I hope that was a smile, Max thought.

  Webster shuffled backward into his burrow so that only his eyes were visible.

  “S-sorry I can’t stay and chat,” he said, “But Barton needs me to dig a tunnel at the front line.” The door to the spider’s burrow shut behind him with a thud.

  Max let out a long sigh of relief.

  “Come on, Barton’s just up here!” Spike called, scuttling over the top of Webster’s trapdoor. Max walked around it, just in case. It was so perfectly camouflaged that no one ever would have spotted it if they didn’t know it was there.

  “There he is,” said Spike, heading toward a rotting log.

  The log was the tallest object in the clearing. On top of it, talking to a group of termites, was a huge, brown beetle with two long feelers and enormous jaws. Max couldn’t help but notice the deep scar running across his wing case.

  “That has to be a titan beetle,” Max muttered to himself, “the biggest beetle in the whole world!”

  “I need you to build a defensive wall,” the beetle was telling the termites in a deep, booming voice. “A line around the edge of the clearing. That might hold those vicious lizards off for a while.” The termites saluted and ran off. The beetle turned to look at Spike. When he saw Max his battle-hardened, scissorlike jaws dropped open.

  “Well, well, well, Spike,” he said. “What do we have here?”

  “I thought it was a lizard, sir,” said Spike. “But it says it’s a human being.”

  Barton flicked his feelers and looked at Max closely. “A human being,” he bellowed. “No, I’ve never heard of one of those before.” He tapped his front feet thoughtfully. “Well, we’ll worry about that later. Name?”

  “Max,” said Max.

  “Friend or foe?”

  Max thought about this for a second. “Friend,” he said.

  “What do you think, Spike, old buddy?” asked Barton.

  “I like him,” Spike declared. “He helped me fight off a lizard. He knew just where to attack. Right on the nostril. I’ll try to remember it for next time.” Spike started snapping his pincers at an imaginary enemy.

  “Hmmm. Useful in a tight spot. I like that in a soldier,” Barton said. He scuttled down from the log and up to Max. “I’m Barton,” he introduced himself. “Leader of the Battle Bugs.”

  “Battle Bugs?” Max asked curiously. He thought he knew every type of insect, but he’d never heard of Battle Bugs. “What are they?”

  “We’re an army, of course,” Barton said, standing up very straight and flicking his feelers impressively. “An army of bugs. All the creatures you see around you now at Bug Base Camp are under my command.”

  “But why do you need an army?” Max asked.

  “Why?” Barton repeated. He turned to Spike. “Doesn’t he know about the war?”

  “I’m not sure,” Spike said, raising both his pincers and clicking them together, which Max supposed was a scorpion’s way of shrugging.

  “The reason we need an army,” Barton continued, turning back to Max, “is that we’re under attack!”

  Max blinked up at him, casting an eye over the browny-black scar on Barton’s back. “From the lizards?”

  “Yes, from the lizards!” Barton boomed. “Where do you think I got this scar from? Have you been living inside a cocoon?”

  Max thought of his bedroom, the old book, and the map. “I’m not from here,” he said. “I don’t even know how I got here. Could you explain the lizards and the war and everything?”

  Barton let out a sigh. “We’ll need a map.” He began drawing one in the soft earth with one of his front legs. Max recognized the shape from the map in the book—it was Bug Island. Then, Barton drew another island.

  “This is Bug Island,” Barton tapped the first island with one of his front feet. “And this”—he tapped the other island—“is the Reptilian Empire. The two lands are separated by a narrow stretch of sea. Or they were, until recently.”

  He drew a line between the two islands.

  “The Reptilian Empire has a mountain on it, at the edge of the coast closest to ours,” Barton continued. “But it turns out it’s no ordinar
y mountain. A few nights ago, there was a terrible rumbling, and then fire came shooting out of the top of it!”

  “It must be a volcano,” Max exclaimed.

  “A vol-what-o?” Spike asked.

  “A volcano,” Max repeated. “They’re made when hot lava from deep inside the Earth bubbles up. It sounds like it erupted.”

  “Erupted!” Barton said.

  Max nodded. “Yes, that’s when the lava bubbles over the top and pours down onto the land below.”

  “That’s exactly what happened,” Barton said, sounding impressed. “Red-hot rock came pouring down the side of the mountain and into the sea. In no time at all, the two islands had been joined together. And once the rock cooled, the lizards immediately began using it as a bridge to invade.”

  Max felt his heart sink. Lizards were bugs’ most deadly predators. If they were invading the island, every single bug’s life was in danger!

  “I was there that night,” Barton continued, “and had a run-in with one of the first lizards to make it onto the island. The slippery fellow caught me by surprise and cracked my wing case, damaging the wings inside.”

  Max gasped. “So that’s where your scar comes from. Can you still fly?”

  “Not at the moment, I’m afraid. My wings are still healing. But that hasn’t stopped me from taking on the those scaly monsters in other ways!”

  Max was impressed by Barton’s bravery. “So you formed an army of bugs to fight back against them?” Max asked.

  “Yes indeed,” replied Barton. “But I’m sorry to say that the lizards are winning.”

  “You saw how strong they are,” Spike said to Max. “And there are even bigger ones than that slimy monster who attacked us.”

  Barton nodded. “The lizards have been advancing for days. Now they almost have us surrounded. We need to come up with the perfect plan—something that will outsmart those tongue-flickers once and for all.” Barton lowered his voice. “Or—and I hate to say this—we’re all doomed!”

  “Maybe I can help,” said Max.

  Barton looked at Max closely. “How? If you don’t mind my saying, you’re, uh, kind of small.”

  “Do you have any claws?” Spike asked, prodding him with his pincers.

  “No,” Max said.

  “Or a stinger hidden somewhere?” Barton asked, circling Max and tickling him with one of his feelers. Max laughed and shook his head.

  “Do you shoot acid from your bottom, like a bombardier beetle?” Spike asked, looking at Max’s behind curiously.

  “No!” Max laughed again. “You bugs can do amazing things that humans can’t. But the one thing we do have is very big brains. Maybe I can think of ways you can use your special skills against the lizards.”

  Barton whisked his antennae back and forth like two long, black whips. “Hmm, yes, I suppose it’s worth a try,” he said. “What do you need to do this thinking?”

  “Well, first, could I have a tour of the island?” Max suggested.

  “Of course,” said Barton. “And I know just the bug to take you.” He wiggled his body, and a high-pitched, grating sound rang out across the clearing. Max realized that Barton was rubbing two of his body segments together to make the sound. Another one of the amazing things bugs can do, he thought.

  A loud, droning buzz echoed around the clearing, then a dark shadow blotted out the sun. Max looked up and saw a winged shape zooming toward them. It buzzed like a noisy engine, and its wings beat so fast that a wind whipped around Max’s ears.

  The flying insect landed next to Barton and Spike. Its antennae, which sprouted above its big, black eyes, made it look as though it was scowling angrily. Its abdomen was striped bright orange and black, and ended in a long, pointed stinger.

  A giant hornet! Max thought nervously. He wasn’t usually afraid of stinging insects, but now that he was the size of a bug himself, a stinger like that would be deadly. It was almost as long as he was!

  “That was very quick,” said Barton approvingly.

  “Yeah, well, I was close by, wasn’t I? Scaring off some spies,” said the hornet fiercely. “Stinkin’ tree frogs! They won’t be bothering us again, though,” she added.

  “Nice one, Buzz!” Spike said with a grin.

  “Yes, well done, Buzz, old pal,” said Barton. He pointed a feeler at Max. “This is Max. He’s a human being.”

  “He’s a what?” asked the hornet.

  “A human being,” Barton repeated. “With a very big brain.”

  “And hair,” Spike added.

  “Oh,” said the hornet.

  Barton turned back to Max. “Max, meet Flight Commander Buzz, the leader of our flying squadron,” Barton said.

  The hornet nodded her huge, orange head. Max nodded hello, too, trying not to stare at Buzz. He’d always thought that hornets had two wings, but up close he could see that Buzz actually had four. In addition to the two big eyes on the side of her face, she had three more in the middle of her forehead. Fascinating! Max thought.

  “Max is new here,” Barton told Buzz. “He says he’s going to help us come up with a plan to beat those rotten lizards. But first he needs a hornet’s-eye view of the island. Could you take him on a flight?”

  “No problem,” said Buzz.

  Max looked at the hornet. “Really? Cool!”

  “Hop on,” said Buzz.

  “Here, I’ll give you a pincer,” Spike offered. He grabbed Max and placed him on Buzz’s back, just behind her head.

  “Ready?” asked Buzz.

  “Ready,” said Max, his heart pounding. Buzz’s back was covered in bristly hairs. Max held on to them and gripped tight with his knees.

  The hornet’s wings began to whirr, making Max’s body shake. This was going to be a bumpy ride! Buzz stretched out her wings, and they rose into the air, straight up like a helicopter.

  “Report back soon, soldiers,” Barton commanded, waving good-bye with his feelers. “Be careful. I can’t afford to lose either of you to the enemy.”

  “Don’t you worry, sir, those slimy reptiles will never catch me!” Buzz shouted over the whirring of her wings.

  “See you later!” Spike called, snapping his pincers in the air.

  Buzz swooped off, rising until they were up among the trees. Max could see the whole clearing below them. They were so high that Barton, Spike, and all the other bugs looked like tiny dots.

  Once he got used to the buzzing and the whirring of Buzz’s wings behind him, Max was actually very comfortable among the hairs on Buzz’s back, and he started to enjoy the hornet’s skillful flying. They zigzagged between the tree trunks, zooming up and down, narrowly missing branches and dangling vines. Holding on tight, Max carefully looked down. The forest floor was so far below him, it made his head spin. This wasn’t like flying in an airplane, or even being on a roller coaster. There was no seatbelt to keep him from falling off—and the ground was a long way down …

  Just as Max was starting to feel dizzy, the forest ended and they were suddenly flying over a beautiful beach. It was very bright after the greenish light of the forest, and a sparkling blue sea lapped against the sand below them.

  “There’s the bridge!” called Buzz, shouting above the hum of her wings.

  Max took a deep breath and leaned over Buzz’s side again. Down below, a rocky path formed a bridge to a nearby island, just as Barton had said.

  The Reptilian Empire, Max thought with a shudder. It wasn’t covered in lush forest like Bug Island; it looked more like a desert, with rocks as gray as thunder clouds and the occasional shriveled-up shrub here and there. Max looked back at the bridge, and started in shock. The bridge appeared to be moving! But as Buzz dived lower, Max realized that it wasn’t the bridge that was moving, it was a stream of reptiles on the bridge, all making their way to Bug Island.

  “There’s more and more of ’em every day,” Buzz shouted grimly.

  It seemed like every type of reptile and amphibian imaginable was crossing the bridge. There were geck
os, chameleons, snakes, frogs, and toads, all slithering, creeping, and hopping forward. The huge, scaly creatures moved their heads from left to right, their flickering tongues tasting the air. They were looking for bugs, Max realized, shuddering. There were enough to eat every creature on Bug Island.

  Buzz turned and followed the stream of reptiles along the beach. To Max’s horror, he saw that they were heading into the forest farther up the coast. If they were entering the forest, then surely it wouldn’t be long before they arrived at the clearing where Barton and the bug army were camped!

  “We’re doing our best to stop ’em, but there’s just too many,” Buzz called to Max, swooping over a sandy hollow where some tarantula spiders were fighting a group of green lizards. Max held his breath as one of the tarantulas reared up onto its back legs and hissed. A lizard whipped its tongue out angrily. The tarantula fought back by flicking its legs back and forth until the air around it became thick with a cloud of hairs.

  Max let out an excited gasp. He had read about tarantula hair-flicking, but never thought he would actually get to see it. He knew from his books that hairs released from the tarantula’s legs would stick to its prey and cause a painful rash or even temporary blindness. He watched as the lizard shrieked and stumbled on the sand.

  “Go, tarantula!” Max shouted.

  As they flew on, Max spotted a praying mantis standing upright and fanning its wings. He knew from his books that this was what the mantis did when it was under attack. Max looked closer and saw a gecko darting back and forth across the sand, taunting the mantis. Max wished there was something he could do to help, but now that he was small, the gecko was the size of an alligator. Buzz was right—there were too many reptiles, and they were too big and strong.

  Buzz slowed down to hover above a large gray rock. Squatting on top of it was the biggest, ugliest lizard Max had ever seen. It had dark brown scales, and its beady black eyes glinted with evil. It turned its huge, mud-colored head from side to side as it surveyed the marching creatures, and its yellow forked tongue darted in and out.