by J. H. Croix
“You’re jealous.” Cat’s voice reached me, sounding amused.
I slid my eyes sideways, incredulous she’d commented on that.
Her eyes twinkled. “Just saying.”
“I am not,” I lied, injecting firmness into my tone. The whole thing was ridiculous.
Cat snorted a laugh. “Yeah, right. You just keep telling yourself that.”
Fuck my life. I had a seventeen-year-old girl giving me shit about being jealous. By the time dinner was over, I was strung tight with annoyance and a sense of possessiveness. As fierce as my need for Nora ran, my feelings left me unsettled. I slipped out the back while she was in the kitchen helping Daphne, Cat, and Flynn clean up.
The autumn air was crisp. A light breeze gusted, carrying the spruce scent and causing the damp earthy leaves to fall to the ground. I walked into the trees behind the resort with quiet footfalls. I took a gulp of air, letting it out slowly as I paused to look through a clearing in the trees. It offered a view of a mountain ridge in the distance, the rising half-moon casting a silvery glow on the snowy peaks. The upper elevations had gotten more snow recently, a clear signal that winter was coming.
After another few breaths, I felt more like myself again. Turning, I kept walking, stuffing my hands in my pockets. I paused and glanced around when I heard a subtle scuffing. In a moment, my eyes found the source of the noise. A porcupine waddled through the trees, the tips of its quills gilded from the moonlight. I waited to move until it was a little farther away. Not because I was nervous about getting quilled, but because porcupines were shy creatures and mostly harmless unless they felt genuinely threatened. There was no need for me to frighten it. It was likely making its way to wherever it planned to sleep for the evening.
The trees opened up a few minutes later after I resumed my walk. I lifted my eyes to discover the staff house was dark. It appeared most were lingering back at the resort or heading into town to the bars. I’d lost all interest in going to town at night once I’d given in to my need for Nora. I was so accustomed to the fire that burned for her that it felt a part of me, woven into my veins and bones.
As much as I wanted to see her, my frustration with feeling possessive and jealous clashed with that desire. Just as I was about to move in the direction of the staff house, the sound of footsteps reached me.
Turning, I recognized Nora’s silhouette through the trees instantly. I felt a tug in my heart, followed by that familiar jolt sizzling through me like fire.
She stopped at the edge of the trees, looking at me across the small clearing. After a beat, she approached me, stopping a few feet away. “I wondered where you went,” she said.
For a second, the urge to make a flippant comment was right there, hovering in the edge of my consciousness. I didn’t because that guy, the one who relied on dismissive comments, was the guy who had hurt Nora before. I felt thrown off my equilibrium, and I didn’t know how to catch my balance again. I closed the distance between us with careful, deliberate strides.
When I paused in front of her, that sense of possessiveness flared. “I’m not sure where I was going either.”
Her dark eyes widened. We were illuminated solely by the pearly glow of the moon.
I took a breath, letting it out slowly as I stepped closer and freed one of my hands from a pocket to slide it through the ends of her silky hair. “You make me a little crazy, you know?”
She shook her head incrementally. “I didn’t know that. I don’t think of myself as the kind of girl who makes anyone crazy.”
A wry chuckle rustled in my throat. “No, you don’t. That guy was right.”
“What guy?”
“The guy who flew with you today.”
She looked up at me, and I wasn’t sure, but I sensed she flushed slightly. There wasn’t enough light for me to know.
“Let me make this clear. You make me crazy, and I know it’s not just me. You’re beautiful, you’re strong, and I want you. So, so much. Also, I was jealous twice today,” I said with a wry twist to my words.
“Twice?” Her tone had a hitch of surprise to it.
“Yes, Nora, twice. First, when I heard that guy by the plane and then tonight at dinner. Nick likes you. I think his name is Nick.”
She scoffed. “No, he doesn’t. How would you even know that? And yes, his name is Nick.”
“Because I’m a man, and he’s a man. Trust me, I know he likes you.”
She eyed me dubiously, pursing her lips as she shook her head slightly and waved a hand dismissively. “Whatever. I’m not interested in Nick or that guy at the plane.”
“No?” Finally, I asked the question that had been eating me up all afternoon and evening.
She shook her head firmly this time. “Just you. You make me a little crazy too.” Her lashes swept down, and I slid my hand into her hair, cupping the back of her head and pulling her close. I felt her shiver.
“Let’s go. You’re cold,” I murmured as I reluctantly eased back and reached for her hand.
She laced her fingers in mine, and we walked quickly through the trees to her place. Our breath misted in the air with every step along the way.
Moments later, the sound of the door slamming shut behind us as we stumbled into her house was another kick to the need already driving me fast. It was a pounding drumbeat through my body, the rhythm kicking faster and faster.
Unsettled as I was with the sense of possessiveness tangling inside my other emotions surrounding Nora, it created this feeling of intensity and exquisite intimacy. I felt as if I were standing on the edge of something immense and about to topple over. No one had ever mattered as much as her. No one had ever elicited feelings like that. I felt vulnerable, and my ability to protect myself from it was worn thin.
Nora was more important than my pride. With my heartbeat thundering in my ears, I kept her hand in mine, moving swiftly up the stairs and into her bedroom without pause after we kicked off our shoes and hung our jackets by the door.
“Gabriel—” she began as I set to unbuttoning her blouse.
“I need you,” I bit out, my voice serrated on the edges.
“Oh,” she whispered. “I’m right here.”
Our clothes came off in a rush, and then my palms were sliding up her thighs, pushing them apart, savoring the tattered sound of her breath as I trailed kisses along the sensitive skin. I moved up swiftly because I needed her mouth underneath mine.
When she sighed into our kiss, her tongue gliding against mine, a sense of relief washed through me. This was what had frightened me about us before. Everything felt so absolutely right with her.
Chapter Twenty-One
Nora
“I’m going to make love to you,” he said, each word slow and deliberate.
My heart ricocheted wildly in my chest, and I tried to catch my breath.
I felt caught in a rushing current of sensation and desire. The calloused surface of Gabriel’s palms sent sparks raining over my skin. His lips felt like hot drops of honey as he pressed them just inside my calf and then on my thigh. One palm was on my belly, his thumb moving in an idle path, sending heated pinwheels throughout my body.
I was near frantic by the time his fingers teased my folds. I was slippery wet, and I heard his low growl of satisfaction, the hum of it reverberating as he brought his mouth to me.
He made love to me with his mouth and his fingers and his tongue, sending me spiraling higher and higher, chasing after the sweet release I craved. By the time it broke over me, I was near incoherent in a sharp burst of exquisite relief.
Then he was rising above me, and I welcomed his weight, savoring his musky scent and the firm press of his body against mine. He was always prepared, this man. I didn’t even know when he’d gotten a condom on, but he had. In a fevered second, he was sliding inside me, the thick, delicious feel of him filling me. My voice was slurred when I murmured, “Gabriel.”
“Right here, darling.” His lips dusted along the side of my neck, sending
hot shivers rippling through me as he drove into me in slow, steady surges.
I was restless underneath him, already chasing after more. I had no idea how long it lasted, but he brought me to another body-shaking release just before he found his own. He collapsed on me before rolling swiftly to the side and bringing me with him. We lay there gasping for air together. The sound of my heartbeat echoed in my ears, and my breath came in tattered gulps.
We’d been intimate many times, but I’d never felt like this. It felt as if something had fallen and given way between us. Simply lying there in the aftermath with him holding me, it felt as if my emotions were pressing against my skin.
This would usually make me anxious, because Gabriel always held himself at bay a little. Yet, when I lifted my drowsy eyelids, I found his gaze waiting. The layer of distance was gone, and he looked almost boyish.
The lamp in the corner of my bedroom, which I had no idea had even been turned on in the midst of our rush, cast a soft glow over him, gilding his auburn hair with flickers of gold.
“Well,” he murmured.
I laid still, letting my fingers draw circles on his chest and wondering if I could let myself have faith in us.
Chapter Twenty-Two
Gabriel
“Okay, what’s the schedule?” Tucker asked. His voice was muffled because he was leaning into the back of one of the planes.
I glanced at the screen on my phone, reviewing an email Nora had just sent with our flight schedules. “You’re doing the mail run, I have some supplies to deliver, and then we both have a few sightseeing trips this afternoon.”
Tucker straightened, closing the door to the back of the plane and leaning against it as he crossed his arms. “Well, it sounds like we’re gonna have the same kind of day.” His bright blue eyes coasted over me. “You’re looking cheerful this morning. Have a good night with Nora?”
I grinned. “Everything with Nora is good.” I didn’t speak it aloud, but it was such a profound relief we weren’t trying to hide us anymore.
Tucker flashed me a quick smile before his gaze sobered. “Flynn’s still worried you’re gonna break her heart again.”
Stuffing my hands in my pockets, I sighed as I scuffed the toe of my boot over the pavement. “I know he is. I won’t though.”
He nodded. “Good. I think you’re good for each other.” He pushed away from the plane before curling his palm over my shoulder and giving it a squeeze. “I’ll see you later. Are we landing around the same time?”
I glanced at my phone again and lifted my eyes to his again. “Yep.”
“Want to grab some burgers and beer at the brewery?”
I checked my hesitation and nodded. “Sounds good.” I always wanted to get back to Nora as soon as I could these days, but I also valued time with my friends.
Later that evening, I pocketed my keys and walked quickly across the parking lot toward Diamond Creek Brewery. This was a favorite place for locals as well as tourists. It was a busy brewery, and, in addition to beer, and they also offered wines, mead, and had recently begun producing a local mulled cider. Along with all of that, they had an excellent restaurant.
I pushed through the doorway into the restaurant. It was housed in a renovated plane hangar. Tucker had texted me that he’d snagged us a booth in the corner by the windows. My eyes scanned the area, and when my gaze landed on his, I lifted my hand in a wave as I threaded my way through the tables.
Tables filled the center of the space with booths lining the walls. In honor of its location as a former plane hangar, small model planes hung from the ceiling in whimsical decoration. The expansive space had rugs scattered on the floors to soften the noise.
I didn’t think I’d ever been here at a time when it wasn’t crowded, and tonight was no exception. I was relieved Tucker had landed a little earlier than me. Otherwise, I didn’t doubt we would be waiting for a table.
Sliding into the booth across from him, I smiled. “Thanks for beating me here. I’m freaking starving, and I can definitely use a beer.”
Tucker grinned. “My timing was good. A group was just leaving when I got here. I’ve already ordered us two beers. I’m assuming the house draft will do for you?”
“You know me well,” I teased.
“Any problems today?” he asked.
“Not a one. Every flight went smoothly. The wildlife cooperated for my scenic trips.”
Tucker chuckled, leaning back in the booth and running a hand through his shaggy brown curls. “Same here. We saw a brown bear by the water. Near Halibut Cove, we saw some moose and even a few sea lions chilling out on the rocks.”
“Sweet. We saw everything but the sea lions.”
My phone rang, and I reached into my pocket to slide it out. Glancing at the screen, I saw my mother’s name. “This is my mom. Mind if I take it real quick?”
He shook his head. “Of course not. I gotta run to the boys’ room anyway.”
He slipped out of the booth as I answered, “Hey, Mom. What’s up?”
“Gabriel!” She opened every call with me like that, her tone sounding surprised.
Considering that I answered every call from her unless I was in the middle of something, it grated on me.
“How’s it going?” I asked, preparing myself for the inevitable request for money.
“Oh, fine, fine,” she chirped. “You?”
“Doing well. Busy, as usual.” I was already annoyed with this call, I wanted to hurry it long. “What can I do for you, Mom?”
“You know, Gabriel, I’m not always calling for something. Maybe I just wanted to say hello,” she replied defensively.
I swallowed my sigh and leaned back in the booth, feeling weary. “I don’t mind that you ask for things, Mom. I do mind the bullshit though.”
She went quiet. I could picture her face, her lips tightening in a line, and her eyes flicking down. Life hadn’t been kind to my mother, and that was the only reason I had any patience with the strange relationship we had. If I could even call it a relationship. Her family life growing up had been unstable, so she struggled with alcohol and stability.
Having two kids when she was young wasn’t a great recipe for her to pull it together. Pressure only added to her general state of distress. She bounced in and out of our lives, gracing us with her presence whenever she needed somewhere to stay. Fortunately, my dad was solid as a rock. I made a mental note to give him a call. He wasn’t much for chatting on the phone, but we were tight. My relationship with him was definitely more about quality rather than quantity.
My mother’s sigh filtered through the phone line as I waited. “I’m sorry you view it that way. I do appreciate the money you sent me earlier. It turns out—”
My impatience got the best of me. “Just tell me how much you need.”
“I need rent money again. A thousand dollars.”
“I’ll wire it over tomorrow morning. I thought you were about to buy a place,” I said. I knew better than to make that last comment because my mom often had plans fall through. In her world, she could merely be thinking about buying a home or wishing she could for it to be considered a plan.
She was quiet for a second before replying, “It didn’t work out.”
“No problem. Like I said, I’ll help.”
This time, her sigh was one of relief as it came out in a rush. “Thank you, I really appreciate it. Have you talked to your sister recently?”
I bit back a groan. “No, Mom. You know she’s not big on phone calls. We text pretty regularly. Next time I talk to her, I’ll let her know you’d like to hear from her.”
My relationship with my sister was similar to that with my dad, with a little more distance. Because the world was what it was, adolescence had been hard on her, and we’d grown apart. Independence was really important to her. She wasn’t a fan of our mom. She carried more resentment than I did, which was saying something, so she rarely spoke with Mom.
“That would be great,” my mother replied
with a forced cheerfulness in her tone.
After I replied with, “Mmm,” my mom fell silent.
I knew we were now at that point of the conversation where she was trying to figure out how to get off the call gracefully. Rather than wait her out, I pushed ahead. “All right. Well, do you need anything else?”
“I don’t think so,” she chirped, her bright tone scraping over my nerves.
“Take care, Mom.” I hung up after she mumbled a goodbye.
Tucker returned at that moment, just as a waitress arrived with our beers. He sat down, and the waitress, a friendly, outdoorsy-looking type with her dark hair up in a ponytail, set our beers down in front of us. She pulled out a small computer tablet. “Okay, guys, are you ready to order some food?”
“I’ll take a burger and fries. Medium rare, please,” I said.
Tucker flashed a grin at me before he looked up at the waitress. “Same here, except make my burger well done.”
“You’ve got it. If you need anything else, just wave when I’m nearby. Food should be out in about fifteen minutes.”
She hurried off, and I lifted my pint glass to take a swallow of beer.
When I set it down, I collided with Tucker’s curious gaze. “What’s up?” he asked.
“Nothing new since you went to the restroom.”
He arched a single brow. “You didn’t look cranky before I went to the restroom, and now you do.”
I took another swallow of beer. Setting the glass down, I traced my fingertip around the base. “You know my mom. She’s always calling for money. It gets old, but I’d feel worse if I didn’t help her out.”
He nodded. He knew the situation with my mother and had even met her once. When we were in the Air Force together and on break, she’d stopped by.
“You don’t have to give her money, you know.”
I leaned my head back, resting it on the booth. “I know I don’t, but whenever I don’t, I feel guilty. I’d rather feel annoyed than guilty.”
His mouth twisted in understanding, and he shrugged. “I get it. There’s no good answer. How are things with Nora?”