TONY: Slow Burn (Raging Fire Book 1)

by Kallypso Masters

  Fiona told him what signs to watch for to indicate he might need further medical care, and he nodded. Stepping out of the ambulance, Tony surveyed the area to see where he might be needed. Brad had already retracted the ladder and Michael worked on putting away their equipment and cleaning up the scene.

  Rafe was nowhere in sight. Tony was a little relieved until he spotted his brother talking with the battalion chief on the other side of the ladder truck. Tony’s heart pumped a little harder thinking about the chewing out he’d soon receive from Rafe and maybe the BC too. In an attempt to avoid his brother, he pitched in to help Michael.

  As dusk set in without any word about the victims being found, the battalion chief called off the water search for the ladder company and ordered them back to the station. Tony wasn’t on duty and knew the SAR teams would continue searching the riverbanks until the victims were found. Maybe he could go out with them tonight to search. No way was he going to get any sleep until they were rescued.

  Rafe approached the passenger side of the truck and stared silently at Tony, a muscle twitching in his jaw. Finally, he said to the three of them, “Let’s head back.”

  Unable to speak past the lump of humiliation in his throat, Tony nodded. Without another word, Rafe took his place in the officer’s seat in the front of the cab. Tony sat in the rear-facing seat behind his brother, unable to look in his brother’s direction. Perhaps needing to have his own time to regroup, Michael also chose a rear-facing seat and stared out his window. Or was it that Michael couldn’t stand looking at Tony after that colossal screwup?

  No one said anything on the ten-minute drive back to the station. Thank you, Jesus. He wasn’t ready to talk about it yet; everything was still too raw. He needed some time to process what happened—or didn’t happen—on his own first.

  Would the rest of the crew join Rafe in blaming Tony for botching up the rescue? He’d tried to do all he could to save the stranded victims, but he’d failed. If Tony hadn’t been hanging out at the station when the tones dropped, would Michael and Rafe have been able to successfully rescue the two after heading out on the ladder, rather than having Tony in the mix?

  Why hadn’t Tony instructed the woman about backup plans and the safety ropes downstream as he was approaching her via the ladder? If she’d known there were safety lines stretched across the river at regular intervals, would she have been able to grab on to one of them? However, he hadn’t wanted to frighten the already terrified woman even further. Undoubtedly, rescue personnel shouted for her to grab onto ropes as she passed them, but he knew firsthand how loud the water was and that he hadn’t been able to hear their shouts to him.

  Damn! He’d been so damned sure he’d be able to get them both off that roof safely. If only he hadn’t let go of the woman’s hand.

  You were knocked into the damned water.

  Okay. Realistically, she wouldn’t have known what he was talking about anyway if he’d tried to tell her about the lines downriver. And with hypothermia setting in, her reaction times would have been too slow and her grip too weak even if she had been able to latch on to one.

  Maybe if he’d tossed the mother the vest before jumping onto the vehicle’s roof, she could have at least put it on before the tree trunk slammed into the RAV4.

  You had her in your hand, for Christ’s sake!

  All he’d had to do was pull her in, but she’d slipped from his grasp the instant the small SUV had been struck. Hell, the whole thing had happened in the blink of an eye, from the point where he’d jumped from the ladder onto the roof to when Tony had grabbed the safety line and abandoned his part in the rescue.

  But it played out much more slowly in his mind’s eye now.

  Back at the station, Tony returned to the kitchen to warm up the minestrone and pull out bowls, telling the guys it would be ready in fifteen minutes. Rafe went into his office and closed the door.

  Shivering again, Tony grabbed a change of clothes from his locker and took a hot shower while the soup reheated. When he returned to the kitchen, Michael was at the stove ladling out two bowls. He handed one to Tony. “Rafe’s just worried about what might have happened if you hadn’t grabbed the line in time.”

  Tony nodded, not wanting to encourage further discussion. Everyone working this shift—except Rafe—joined him at the table. All ate silently. Tony continued to listen for word that the mother and her daughter had been found alive, but the radio was as subdued as those sitting around this table.

  Tony glanced at Rafe’s door every now and then, wondering if he should knock and remind him dinner was ready. Rafe didn’t usually give him the silent treatment like this. Then again, Tony hadn’t messed up this bad before, either. Still, how long would his big brother stay pissed?

  Well, Rafe sure hadn’t cornered the market on being angry or frustrated at Tony. The youngest Giardano brother wasn’t happy with his own job performance today, either. It would have all been worth it if they’d had a positive result, but…

  I never lost a kid on my watch before.

  He hoped someone downriver would succeed where he’d failed. Unable to finish his minestrone, he dumped the rest down the garbage disposal and turned around as Rafe came out to join them.

  “Can I fix you a bowl?” Tony hoped to get the two of them talking again.

  “I’ll get my own.” Rafe replied, picking up a bowl and turning away from Tony. “You need to go home and forget about this. Don’t go back down to the river tonight. I’ll see you when I come in for my shift Wednesday morning. The BC wants to do an AAR at shift change while everyone involved in today’s rescue run is present.”

  Tony nodded as he rinsed his bowl in the sink. The last thing he was in the mood for was an After Action Review to rehash the event and figure out what worked and what didn’t.

  Tony never should have been in that ladder truck on that call. That’s why it all went bad.

  “You know I’ll be there.” Because it would be right after his shift ended, and he had no excuse to miss the mandatory meeting. Placing his rinsed bowl in the dishwasher, he left the station without another word to anyone.

  Inside the cab of his truck, a glance at the dashboard clock told him it was way too early to head home and stare at the walls. He’d only get lost in his thoughts about everything that had gone wrong.

  He needed to do something.

  Regardless of Rafe’s orders, Tony texted Luke Denton to find out where the Fairchance SAR teams had been assigned to search. If Tony’s own lieutenant had said the same thing as Rafe had, Tony probably would have obeyed him. But Rafe was just being overprotective of his baby brother. Well, Tony was a grown-ass man who didn’t have to do what his big brother said anymore.

  When the text came in with the info he needed, he put his F-150 in gear and sped off to the spot just north of town.

  Chapter Five

  Over a working dinner with Sandro Sunday evening, Carm discussed the coming week’s resort activities to be sure all their bases would be covered while she was climbing Capitol Peak with Nick London’s group from New York. The resort had become a well-oiled machine, capable of running with one or the other of them absent.

  With business talk behind them and just a few minutes to kill before she headed to bed, Carm brought up the idea of each of them taking some time away from work.

  “You mean other than your outdoor excursions and my attending trade shows?” Sandro asked.

  She rolled her eyes. “As much as we enjoy those things, they’re still work.”

  “True. I don’t remember the last time I went somewhere for no reason other than to have fun.” He looked away a moment as if picturing where he’d like to go before meeting her gaze again. “Where would you go?”

  She took a deep breath, not wanting to appear to have her mind set on any specific place yet. “Sara mentioned a place in the Caribbean that she’s been to a few times.”

  Using her phone to display Sara’s Facebook timeline, she showed him some pictu
res of her friend’s last visit to the islands this past January.

  “You planning to get in some scuba diving?”

  “You know it. I’m probably rusty now after not going for the last two years, but hope I’ll be able to get some dive time in.” She’d missed the pure serenity she felt while underwater and exploring the ocean in the past, before life became consumed by work.

  Both siblings agreed that mid-August would be the perfect time for Carm’s chance to escape and recharge before the fall foliage season hit in September. And that would be followed all too soon by the five-month ski season.

  “How long would you want to take off?” he asked.

  “Maybe a week.”

  He shook his head, and she was ready to settle for four days when he said, “Hell, take two weeks and really recharge your batteries.”

  She smiled. “Thanks, but I don’t have more than a ten-day stretch of time on the resort calendar that’s not booked by excursion guests this summer.”

  “Then ten days it is,” Sandro announced, wiping his mouth and setting his napkin aside before sitting back in his chair. “Sure you don’t want to take me with you?”

  Carm laughed. “If I were going to take a man with me, I assure you it wouldn’t be my brother.”

  Sandro scrutinized her a moment. “So are you thinking of going with a guy?”

  Her eyes opened wider. “Hell, no! I guess that was just my poor attempt at banter.”

  Sandro shrugged nonchalantly. “I wondered, that’s all, after the way you and Tony Giardano got into that garter reversal last night.”

  “Puh-leez,” she said, averting her gaze. “I’d like to purge that episode from my memory banks.” Which I’ve been trying to do without much success ever since saying goodbye to him this morning. Heat infused her cheeks. She hoped her brother attributed it to her after-dinner Disaronno and took another sip. “No, this will definitely be me time. Lazing around the pool or at the beach. Diving. A day at the spa. Catching up on books by my favorite authors.”

  And deciding what I want out of the rest of my life.

  Carm took a bite of her tiramisu and let it melt in her mouth. At some point, she needed to think about whether she wanted to start dating seriously with thoughts of marrying and starting a family. Or perhaps she would choose to stay married to her career. In the past, the thought of raising kids both appealed to her and terrified her. What if she chose the wrong guy the way her late Aunt Emiliana had? Carm liked to believe she was a good judge of character, but shuddered at the thought of what that evil man had done to Mama.

  Carm centered herself in the present again. Or was it the future? She wouldn’t want to screw up her kids the way Marc had been messed up by family secrets.

  Her kids.

  It had a nice ring to it. She could almost picture herself a mama to a little girl or boy—maybe one of each.

  The girl in her mind looked a lot like she did as a child and the boy looked like…Tony?

  She shuddered.

  “Cold?” Sandro asked.

  “No. Just thinking about how cold it’s going to be on Capitol this week compared to those sunny beaches.” She lied before banishing thoughts of Tony from her mind once more. It occurred to her they hadn’t talked about Sandro’s taking time off. “Now, what about you, Sandro? You need to think about your own getaway for after I get back. We’ve both been working too hard this past year.”

  “Things do seem to be running pretty smoothly now,” Sandro said, taking a sip of coffee as he appeared to give it some thought. “Actually, I’ve been considering a trip to Italy, mostly to see how our Tuscany and Lombardy counterparts do things at their ski resorts.”

  “That’s still job-related.” They were both such workaholics.

  He shrugged. “New surroundings will help me refill the well.”

  “Well, if you do go, promise me you won’t be all work and no play over there. Take a week or more to explore, sightsee, eat, drink, and just do whatever you’d like—away from the major resorts.”

  “I’ll see what I can come up with.”

  Suddenly, realization dawned about her stray thoughts earlier. Her biological clock had shifted into overdrive this weekend. It must have been the wedding or seeing Savannah nursing her baby, which would totally account for her unwanted fantasies about Tony. Nothing but hormones.

  Good, because twenty-eight was too young—and Carm too career driven at the moment—to cave in to her body’s need to procreate. She could wait a few more years before getting serious about someone, if that was the path she chose to take.

  But if she were in the market for a potential baby daddy, would Tony be the worst candidate? He loved his family, which was an imperative trait for any prospective husband of hers, and with his looks, he’d make beautiful babies.

  Ugh. Stop it! Remember he’s also bossy, opinionated, and oddly carefree. In fact, the man didn’t seem to take anything seriously.

  Carm needed someone who would be staid and steady when it came to important matters, who would encourage the decisions she made, and would help her to find a work/fun balance in life.

  Did Tony even like to travel, which was important to her?

  Sandro broke into her thoughts. “After hearing all the stories Mama and Papa shared with us, not to mention Gramps’s wartime adventures, there are several places important to our family history that I’d like to visit.”

  “Yes! You have to do that, Sandro! I might even follow in your footsteps next year, because we totally need to make vacations an annual thing from now on.” Balance. The two of them needed to prioritize finding balance in their lives.

  Sandro became introspective for a moment, then nodded as he met her gaze. “Why not? We’re only a cell phone call away if we need each other.”

  She held up her hand midair between them, palm outward, to halt him going any farther down that path. “Speak for yourself, Brother! If you think I intend to answer phone calls or check e-mails during my getaway, you need to think again.”

  The two of them laughed.

  “Be careful on Capitol.”

  “Always am. There’s no rain predicted for our second day, so we should be fine on Knife Edge. Most of Nick’s group are seasoned climbers, but you know I won’t let them make any beginner mistakes like take a shortcut back to the lake.”

  Sandro nodded, gave her a peck on the cheek, and said goodbye before they parted ways. Before going to bed, Carm texted Sara asking for the vacation rental link to the villa. Her friend’s almost immediate reply placed it on an island in the Turks and Caicos. Carm spent the next half hour immersed in the photos on the villa’s rental listing. She could picture herself on that beach, by that pool, cooking seafood and fresh veggies in that amazing gourmet kitchen, and all in all, living a life far removed from her Aspen condo or the resort she barely enjoyed anymore because of all the work. There was even a hammock under the palm trees! Carm planned to load up her iPad with lots of novels to enjoy in that hammock.

  That villa would be a little piece of heaven on earth during the week she spent there.

  In the past few years, she’d fallen asleep the moment her head hit the pillow. Well, except for last night when Tony had invaded her thoughts. She shook off the memory.

  And she needed to clear her mind of thoughts about a vacation still six weeks off too. She’d get her break soon enough. Fortunately, the next few days would keep her busy—in both body and mind—so she wouldn’t give the villa or Tony another thought.

  Close to midnight, Tony parked near the front door of daVinci’s. After searching the riverbanks for close to four hours, new SAR members had come on-site and the ones who’d been out looking for hours had been told to get some sleep and come back at eight tomorrow morning.

  Sleep was out of the question. While his body was exhausted, his mind churned a mile a minute trying to figure out what he should have done differently to save them.

  Tony entered the bar and looked around for familiar faces
. The crowd was light at this hour; he didn’t recognize anyone but the owner, Rico Donati. The rest were probably vacationers—like the mother and toddler who’d fallen into the river. The county’s mountains were dotted with vacation rentals occupied by tourists who were unfamiliar with how quickly the waters could rise during flash-flooding conditions.

  Don’t think about them anymore tonight.

  A brunette at the end of the bar met his gaze and smiled. Yeah. She’d be the perfect distraction for a few hours until he was numb enough to go home to bed.

  “Tony? What are you doing here?” Rico asked as he polished some bar glasses and gave Tony a piercing stare.

  “Looking for a beer and some company.”

  “One beer coming up.” Rico started to pull the tap lever on Tony’s usual light beer. “I don’t have to help you in the company territory, though.” Rico glanced at the woman at the end of the bar.

  “Make it a G’Knight Imperial Red tonight.” Tony needed to break out of his routine.

  Rico gave Tony an understanding nod.

  Tony definitely had no intention of gabbing with Rico about what had happened today. But unable to stand being alone with his thoughts tonight, Tony gravitated toward the brunette who sat drinking an IPA from a local brewery. “Mind if I join you?”

  “Help yourself,” she said, indicating the vacant stool next to her.

  Soon after Tony sat down, Rico set his can of beer and a frosted pub glass on the bar beside him. “First one’s on me. Sorry about what happened on today’s run, Tony.”

  Tony shrugged, immediately realizing that came across as uncaring but not ready to admit to himself that all hope was lost. Not until the bodies were recovered anyway. Of course, if the two were indeed dead, there would be no one to blame but himself as being the direct reason Rafe’s crew had been unable to rescue them.

  Give it a rest for now.

  The last thing Tony intended to talk about tonight was what had happened earlier, but he needed to give Rico some kind of response. “Fresh search teams are working through the night. I’ll be back up there at first light if they aren’t found by then.” He could volunteer with search and rescue all day if needed, because he wasn’t on duty at the station until Tuesday morning. “Thanks for the beer, but open a tab anyway.” He’d need several to reach the level of numbness he sought.