Nex

by Cheryl Douglas

  “The girls you date aren’t into picnics?”

  I laughed, thinking how they’d probably scream at the sight of a bug or worry their makeup might melt in the sun. “Not really. I guess I usually date high-maintenance women.”

  “That’s code for perfect, right?” she said, slipping into the passenger’s seat when I opened her door. She was busy fastening her seat belt when I surprised her with a kiss.

  “No, not perfect. Made up. Fake. Trying too hard. You. Are. Perfect,” I said, punctuating each word with a kiss.

  “You’re lying, but thank you.” She curled her arms around my neck, sighing contentedly. “I don’t care if there’ve been a hundred girls before or if there’ll be a hundred after me. I’m just glad to be here with you today.”

  Her words hit me like a slap upside the head, making me realize I didn’t want there to be a hundred girls after her. I knew if there were, I’d just be comparing every one of them to Jaci.

  “What makes you think I’m interested in looking elsewhere?” I asked, gripping her chin between my thumb and forefinger. “I’m pretty damn happy with what I have right here and now.”

  “But we haven’t even…” She bit her lip as her gaze shifted to my mouth. “Made love yet. How do you know I’ll be able to satisfy you? I haven’t experimented very much,” she whispered as though she feared someone might be eavesdropping. “Things with Scott were pretty—”

  “Boring?” I asked, cutting her off with another kiss. The thought of her being with another man made my gut churn, even if she had been his long before she’d been mine.

  “He just wasn’t very adventurous.” She wrinkled her nose. “And I didn’t want to freak him out by suggesting anything kinky.”

  I dropped my head, thinking this was the last place we should be having this conversation. “Just know I’m game for anything,” I whispered in her ear. “Anything you want to try, don’t be afraid to tell me.” I couldn’t imagine she would propose anything that could shock me. Hell, I’d probably done it all at least once.

  “Is that what this relationship is supposed to be about, you think? Exploring my sexual side?”

  No way did I want her to think this was all about sex for me. “I think it’s about exploring all facets of your personality in a relationship and figuring out what makes you happy.”

  My brothers would be laughing their asses off if they could hear me now, but I wasn’t lying. I wanted Jaci to discover the best version of herself with me, just as she was bringing out a side of me I didn’t know existed. The softer, more romantic side who would do just about anything to please his woman. Including a picnic.

  “Now let’s head out,” I said, dropping one more kiss on her lips. “I don’t know about you, but I’m hungry.”

  “Sure.”

  I rounded the front of the car and found her sliding a hand over the leather upholstery when I got inside. “This car is gorgeous. You said your brother Seb restored it, right?”

  “Yeah.” Before putting my seat belt on, I asked, “You wanna drive it home?”

  “Oh no, I couldn’t,” she said, shaking her head. “I can’t drive stick.”

  I grinned, winking at her. “I’ll teach you, but not here. We’ll find some out-of-the-way spot for your first lesson.”

  “Are you crazy?” she asked, wide-eyed. “You’d actually let me drive this?”

  “Sure, why not?” My brother would argue this was more than a car, it was a piece of history, but to me, if it had four wheels and a motor, it was just a car.

  “But how much is this thing worth?” She covered her mouth. “Sorry, that was really rude.”

  “I don’t mind,” I said, smiling as I turned the key. “It was appraised at $150k, but Seb swears it’s worth more than that. He thinks I need to get a second opinion.”

  “My God,” she said, shaking her head. “This car is worth almost as much as my mama’s house. And you have how many more vehicles, two or three?”

  I knew she didn’t mean to make me feel guilty about my toys, but I couldn’t help but feel a twinge of embarrassment as I pulled out of the lot. “I’m not big on the idea of saving for a rainy day. That’s not to say I don’t invest and save my money. I do, but I also believe in enjoying it. I work hard and think I deserve to treat myself now and then.”

  “I’m sorry,” she said, covering my hand with hers on the gearshift. “I wasn’t judging you. I guess I’m just not used to having more than I need of anything.” She giggled. “Except maybe clothes and shoes. Would you believe I have plastic bins stacked in my bedroom because I don’t have enough closet space?”

  I glanced at her out of the corner of my eye. “If there’s one thing my house has plenty of, it’s closet space.”

  She squeezed my arm, smiling. “Stop! I may never wanna leave.”

  “Maybe that’s the plan, sweetheart.”

  ***

  I surprised her by leading her to a semi-private lake in my gated community. The few times I’d been there, it had been quiet, so I thought it would be the perfect spot for lunch.

  “I can’t believe how beautiful this area is,” she said, gaping at the backside of some of the estate homes facing the water.

  I spread the blanket we’d brought from my house on a grassy patch under a mature oak tree. “It’s a nice mix of slightly older and newer homes, but the neighbours are nice and it’s fairly private.”

  “Is your house older or newer?” she asked, reaching into the picnic basket as she began to lay out the bread, crackers, fruit, cheese, spreads, and olives she’d selected. “It’s kind of hard to tell. I mean it looks new, but…?”

  “It’s not that new,” I said, opening the bottle of chardonnay I’d selected from the wine fridge. I wasn’t big on vino. I’d take a cold beer or scotch on the rocks any day over wine, but I assumed Jaci might appreciate wine more. “It’s about twenty years old, actually. I just gutted it before I moved in. I liked the area, but some of the houses were just too big for me.”

  “Some look huge,” she agreed, handing me the wine glasses we’d brought. “But your house isn’t small either.”

  I’d given her the grand tour before we left, and I could see how it might have looked large to her, but it was actually one of the smaller ones in the area. “It’s just over three thousand square feet,” I said, filling both glasses before handing one to her.

  She took both glasses so I could set the cork back in the wine bottle. “So, big enough for a family?” she asked, handing my glass back to me. “Is that what you were thinking?”

  I accepted one of the paper plates she’d packed and smiled while she piled my plate high with a little bit of everything she’d brought. “Yeah, sure. I’d like to have a family eventually. How about you?”

  She nodded before popping a square of feta cheese in her mouth followed by a bite of bread. “Definitely, but not until after I finish school and get established in my career.”

  “You plan on going back to Georgia after you get your degree?” Damn, I hated the thought of that.

  “That’s the plan,” she said, pulling a single grape off the small stem on her plate. “Unless something dramatic happens.”

  Falling in love with me would be pretty dramatic, right? But would I be reason enough for her to stay? I sure as hell hoped so, but I’d have to work on convincing her to stay this summer first. “You said you’re studying business, right?” When she nodded, I asked, “What do you plan to do after graduation?” She’d once mentioned the possibility of opening a small restaurant in her hometown but didn’t seem convinced it would be viable.

  “I’m not sure yet,” she admitted. “I guess I’ll just have to wait and see. I’d love to work in the food industry, maybe in a managerial capacity.”

  The fact that she’d set her sunglasses aside allowed me to see that prospect didn’t really light her up the way it should have. “If you could do anything without the risk of failure, without having to consider practicality, what would it
be?”

  “I’d be a chef.”

  Wow, she didn’t even hesitate, and the way she said it convinced me that’s what she should be pursuing. “Then why the hell are you studying business?” Not that the knowledge wouldn’t be valuable if she was able to open her own restaurant, but it clearly wasn’t her passion. “Shouldn’t you be studying culinary arts or something?”

  “That would be my dream,” she said, sighing. “But I’m trying to be practical. I live in a little town, Nex. Our idea of good food is fried chicken, butter beans, and cornbread. Don’t get me wrong, I love that too, but I like experimenting with food, and I don’t think there’s a place for that where I come from.”

  “So stay here, where just about anything goes.” Stay here with me. And forget about going back home, to your ex-boyfriend and old life.

  “I wish I could.” She looked thoughtful as she stared out at the lake. “But my mama’s not getting any younger. I’m all she has. I’ll have to be there to take care of her one day.” She turned to face me, looking vulnerable. “She has Parkinson’s.”

  “I’m sorry. I didn’t know.” Clearly, that changed everything.

  “I already see subtle little changes in her as the months pass, and I know it’s going to get worse as time goes on. I just hope I’m able to stay here and finish my degree before I have to move back and take care of her.”

  “Maybe she could come here?” I suggested, thinking there had to be another way for Jaci to stay in Florida. No way could I let myself fall in love with a girl who would be gone in three years, tops. After that much time, losing her would kill me.

  “Our whole family’s there,” she explained. “Her sisters and brother, nieces and nephews. Plus, she’s still very involved in the church and community. I think starting over somewhere else would be the worst thing for her.”

  I wanted to suggest a caregiver, but I thought of my own mother, who’d been sick before she passed. My brothers and I would never have allowed a stranger to tend to her needs. She took care of us when we needed her, so we took care of her. So I, better than most people, understood and respected Jaci’s commitment to her ailing mother.

  But I was having a hard time figuring out what that meant for us. A temporary relationship wasn’t what I had in mind. Over the past few months, I’d even started to entertain the possibility this woman could be the one. Still, letting her go now didn’t seem like an option, so what the hell was I supposed to do?

  Chapter Eight

  Jaci

  It would be so easy to fall in love with him, I thought, staring at Nex over our shared chocolate mousse. But that would be a huge mistake. Even if he continued to be as wonderful as he’d been today, I was leaving soon, and I’d be gone for three months. That was more than enough time for him to forget all the reasons he’d been attracted to me in the first place.

  “This was hands down the best meal I’ve ever had,” he said, wiping his mouth with the linen napkin.

  “You’re just saying that,” I said, unable to hide my elation at the compliment.

  I’d prepared avocado-shrimp ceviche as an appetizer, with tilapia and mango salsa as the entrée, and he seemed to enjoy that almost as much as the homemade chocolate mousse.

  “You want a part-time job, you should talk to my sister-in-law,” he said, offering me the last bite of mousse before he had it. “Mac just opened a bakery with her mom. She only does it part-time because of her boys, and I think her mom could really use some help.”

  I would love to work in a bakery, but I’d taken the job at the bar because it was close to home and the tips were good. I often needed the cash I got every night just to get me through the week. “I’d love that, but the bar seems like a more practical solution, at least for now.”

  He grimaced before pushing his plate aside. “I’m not gonna lie, babe. I hate that you’re working there. I know those guys. Some of them are dangerous. I hate to think about you even being in their company.”

  I appreciated his concern, but he needed to know I could take care of myself. Except for last night. I had definitely needed him then. “Don’t worry about me. I’ll be fine,” I said, standing to clear the plates.

  “Don’t.” He reached for my hands, forcing me to set the plates down or risk dropping them. “Let’s just go into the other room and have a drink.”

  He’d already had several drinks throughout the course of the day, which I knew wasn’t a lot for a brawny guy like Nex, but I had a serious thing against drinking and driving, which made me question what he had in store for the rest of the night.

  He’d been sweet and affectionate all day, but he hadn’t said anything that would lead me to believe he expected me to spend the night again. In his bed this time. I didn’t know how I would feel if he asked. I thought I was ready to take that step, but after reciting all the reasons I had to go back to Hartwell eventually, I wasn’t sure it was a good idea to get too involved with Nex.

  “Come on,” he said, standing as he pulled me into his arms. “I really don’t want this day to end.”

  Neither did I.

  I let him hold me, wondering why it had to feel so good to be wrapped in his strong arms. Everything about him turned me on, from his powerful body to his raspy voice and gentle, purposeful touch. His protective nature and deep love for his family only sweetened the pot.

  “I want you,” he murmured, his hands gliding down my back. “You don’t know how much I want you.”

  His voice sounded gruff, almost desperate, and it made me feel the same way. Like I had to have him. “I want you too.”

  “I don’t want to pressure you,” he said, his hands hovering above the buttons on my blouse, as though waiting for permission to continue. “I didn’t ask you to come here because I expect anything, but God help me, I want everything with you.”

  I didn’t know what that meant and was afraid to ask, but I felt like we’d passed the point where we needed words to express ourselves. I wanted him. He wanted me. That was the only thing that seemed to matter now.

  “Let’s go to your room,” I said, curling my hands around his.

  “Are you sure, baby? I don’t want you to do this unless you’re sure.”

  “Nex,” I said, moving my hands to his face, “I’ve been attracted to you ever since I laid eyes on you. Over the past few months, we’ve become friends. The past few weeks, we’ve become more. Tonight, I’m ready for us to become…” I didn’t know what we’d be after tonight, how the intimacy would change our relationship, but I was willing to take that risk knowing the potential reward would be worth it. “I don’t know. Lovers?”

  “I can have casual sex with most women, Jaci,” he said, slowly unbuttoning my blouse before spreading it apart. “But not with you. I’ve spent too much time getting to know you, falling for you. I’m not interested in a friends-with-benefits kind of arrangement. You need to know that.”

  “What do you want?” I asked, watching him peel my blouse off and drape it across the chair, leaving me in a skimpy tank top and skinny jeans. I was still fully clothed, but the way he looked at me made me feel naked. And I liked it. No, I loved it.

  “I want you in my bed,” he said, running his hands up my ribcage before drifting across my breasts, tweaking my nipples through a layer of fabric and lace. “But I want you out of bed too. I want to hear your voice on the phone during the day. I want to smile when I see your random texts on my phone.”

  I was mesmerized as I watched him reach behind his back and pull his soft cotton T-shirt over his head. Wow. I’d never seen him without a shirt before. I didn’t realize the ink traveling up his arms extended to his bare, muscular chest. My mouth was watering, my palms itching to caress every inch of him. Only his words stopped me.

  “I want you here with me as much as possible. I want to be able to pick you up from work. Take you out to dinner.” His blue eyes were locked on mine as though he were trying to get inside my head. “I want you to be the woman on my arm at these fun
draisers I have to go to. I want you on the back of my motorcycle when I need to blow off a little steam and under me when I need my fix of you.”

  “What you’re describing,” I said, struggling to find my voice, “sounds a lot like a relationship.” I’d had one rule when I moved here: no relationships. I wanted to have fun, step out of my comfort zone, party with my girlfriends, and get through school. That’s it.

  “I guess it does.”

  His hands slipped under my tank before easing it over my head. He sucked in a breath at the sight of my breasts spilling out of my pale yellow bra. I wasn’t naïve enough to think he hadn’t seen his fair share of large breasts before, but at least I could say mine were the real deal, and that had to count for something.

  “Relationships scare me,” I said softly, reaching for his belt buckle.

  I couldn’t believe we were undressing in the middle of his kitchen, in front of a bank of windows, with the lights on at night, but it didn’t seem to matter where we were when he looked at me like that. On the roof, in the middle of a crowded movie theatre, or in a cramped car, I would have been good to go just about anywhere with him.

  “They scare me too,” he surprised me by admitting. “I’ve never been very good at them. But for you, I want to try.”

  I loved that he wanted more than one night with me. But how much more? That was the part that scared me. “I don’t think I can make any promises, Nex.” Beyond promising to enjoy every inch of his body tonight.

  “I can.” He licked a path up my neck, setting my whole body on fire. “I can promise to be an attentive boyfriend. I can promise to be faithful to you. I can promise to spoil you, protect you, treat you the way you deserve to be treated.”

  Oh God, when he said things like that, I felt like a gooey marshmallow. “You don’t have to say those—”

  His lips cut my words off again, not that I was complaining. As his tongue tangled with mine, every logical argument I’d had against this dissolved, reminding me I’d promised myself to act on impulse once in a while and trust my instincts more. This felt right.