by S Yvonne
A couple of hours later and everybody was tipsy and full, When they sang happy birthday, QUA stood behind her holding her by the waist. “Make a wish.” He whispered in her ear. She closed her eyes and asked for God to help her and prayed all her demons off of her… eventually it’ll get better. When she opened her eyes, she blew out the candle and this was the happiest she’d been in a long time.
By the end of the night, they were tired and exhausted. “I’m not cleaning all this up tonight.” Tasha giggled flopping on the couch.
QUA sat next to her. “You so pretty.” He told her with lazy eyes.
She reached up and kissed his lips… nothing too deep, just a peck, but to her surprise, he did more and actually kissed her… like passionately. Something he hadn’t done in a long time. It felt like they were kissing all about five minutes before they came up for air. “Thank you…” her chest slowly heaved up and down.
“For what?” He quizzed.
“For trying… for everything… even for going over and beyond to make me happy on some of my darkest days. I know one day, I’ll be free from all of this.”
He pulled a box from his pocket and opened it showing her a ring. “Give me your right hand…” he grabbed it and placed it on her ring finger. “This is a promise I’ll always be here as long as I have breath in my body. Don’t ever forget that.” He told her.
She admired the ring and nod her head. It wasn’t a big ring, but it was beautiful and she’d cherish it forever. “I love it.” She beamed.
“Good…” He sighed. “So, I’ve been wanting to talk to you about something but I just ain’t wanna spook you.”
“What?” She frowned with worry wrinkles on her forehead.
“The police have been tryna keep quiet about this, but they left Ralph out on bond.”
Her heart dropped. “He’s gonna kill me QUA…” She leaned back feeling a stabbing in her heart. “He lost everything because of me.”
“Nah, he lost everything cause of his muthafuckin’ self and cause he’s a fuckin’ pervert and he’s not gon’ fuck with you or my daughter cause I’ma handle it.”
“By doing what?” She asked.
“Just know… I got you it don’t matter, he’s not getting away with that shit.”
Tasha didn’t know what he was getting at but she knew he wasn’t a killer. QUA could easily win a fight and had no problem checking niggas but he had never caught a body so that wasn’t her concern. She was just afraid of him doing something that could get him taken away from her cause she didn’t have nobody else. She felt alone, the lil family she did have was done, that shit was over.
“Don’t worry bout nothin’ go get some rest.” He told her.
Without another word, she stood up and walked into the bedroom where she grabbed the baby and for the first time allowed her to sleep with her in her bed.
Fifteen
Tasha and Qua had been inseparable in the upcoming weeks; the only time they were apart was when she went to GED class and he was in the streets hustling. Today he was taking them out to lunch but had to stop in the projects first. At first Tasha was hesitant but he did just like he said and was in and out. When he got back in the car he was all ready to go but Tasha stopped him. “What!”
“What happen?”
She grabbed a sleeping Lyric from her car seat and wrapped her with a zebra printed blanket before getting out. As soon as she felt the difference in the air a wave of sadness overcame her. “I want you to take this picture with me and Lyric, for memories. She was glad it was quiet out and she assumed cause it was kinda cool outside. Black people always wanted to stay in when it was cold. She walked to the stoop that connected to her old building and sat down. She wore her hair hanging with a red headband that her baby hairs lay perfectly around. She rocked her favorite bamboos with the Cuban link around her neck. Her choice of style was a red, white, and yellow Wilson jacket with the matching yellow shirt. A simple pair of dark blue jeans hugged her body and the red high top Chucks she wore complimented the red lipstick surrounding her perfect shaped lips.
In front of her, QUA held the little disposable camera to snap her picture. “You gone smile?” He asked.
She shook her head ‘No’… with that, he snapped the picture for her before they left and went to get it printed out for her to keep. She actually printed a few copies but the picture told a story just from looking at her.
The rest of the day went by good and after lunch QUA needed to drop them off and go handle business. Tasha didn’t mind though cause she needed to study. After getting Lyric settled, she made a pot of spaghetti for the night and then showered before pulling out her books. As soon as she sat down her phone was ringing but the number was unknown, like a private call. “Hello?” She answered. It was nothing, all she could hear was breathing. “Hello?”
They hung up and called right back.
“Hello?!” She snapped. Still nothing. “Stop ringing this fucking phone!” She hung up with her heart racing. She felt in her heart she knew who it was, but how? How would he even get her number? Immediately hopping up she checked the door making sure the top and bottom was locked and she check the windows as well. Peaking in on Lyric, she was in her swing calm; not sleep but she wasn’t fussing. Tasha called Pepper. “Pep…”
“What’s wrong?” She asked alert.
“It’s him… I know it’s him. Somebody keeps calling my phone and just breathing and hanging up.”
“What?!” Pepper blurted.
“Yes… that’s what I’m saying.”
“You gone tell QUA?” She asked.
“Yes… no… I mean shit, ion know. Ion want him to get in no trouble.”
“No more secrets, you better tell him.” She warned.
“Okay… I’ll call you back.”
Tasha hung up and called QUA numerous of times without getting an answer and that pissed her off. He always answered his phone. He was either in the streets or with a bitch. She didn’t have a choice but to relax and try to lay down before the headache she was forming got any worse. She knew QUA would one day have to see his uncle cause they were family; and she was hoping they could talk it out but knowing Ralph and his cockiness it would turn into so much more.
Tasha peaked in on Lyric one more time and before she knew it, she was dozing off. She didn’t even hear her phone when QUA was calling her back.
Sixteen
A few hours later in the wee hours of the morning, Tasha was startled by QUA busting through the front door with blood all over his clothes. He rushed right pass her on the couch and ran straight to the bathroom where he leaned over the toilet vomiting. He was sweating and distraught. Real bad. Tasha stood at the door shaking watching him. She didn’t have to ask him what was wrong, she knew this all too well, she’d seen it happen to both Cleo and DayDay when they caught their first body… but the question was who?
He coughed uncontrollably trying to get it all out. “Ta…Tasha… Ta…”
“Shhhh.” She told him as she kneeled down beside him pulling him in for a hug; the tears rolling down her face as her heart pounded out of her chest. She was scared for him, she knew what he’d done but why, and to who was what she wanted to know. She was smart enough to know now wasn’t the time for all the questions. She helped him get out of his clothes in which she put in the tub and drowned with peroxide to get the blood out before she put them in the washer where she washed them twice. Next, she helped him into the tub to rinse off and then she cleaned the tub in peroxide.
Lyric had waken up by then so she had to settle her down and then tend back to QUA. He lay in the bed silent wearing his boxers and a ripped chest. He stared at the ceiling. “I just wanted to talk to him… that’s it. He attacked me.”
“Who QUA?” She ask. “Did anybody see you?”
“Ion know T… ion even know.” He leaned over and kissed her. He kissed her so hard like he knew something she didn’t know. Like he never wanted to let go. One kiss, just one and that’
s all it took and much to her surprise; Qua was pulling out a condom and they were having sex. Not just any sex, like real passionate sex and at first it hurt so badly because she felt like a born again virgin but once that surpassed, she was able to be what he needed her to be… comfort.
Laying on top of her he ran his hands up and down her smooth thighs as she spread them even further bucking her hips to match his rhythm. QUA ran his tongue around her nipples a devouring them like little Hershey kisses. No words needed to be spoken between them. they spoke to each other with their bodies. “I love you Tasha…” He told her in between kisses. “I love you and Lyric so much.”
“Ohhh… we love you too QUA.” She panted wanting to savor the feeling that he was giving her forever. Tasha was trying to focus but from the outside, she thought she heard noises around the window. Closing her eyes she focused back on QUA as he stroked her deeply.
“Cum for me Tasha…” He whispered in her ear. “Cum for me baby.”
Squeezing her eyes tight. She released all of her juices. “Ohhhh I’m cumminggggg!” She squealed.
“Mmmm me too!” He ejaculated his semen in to the barrier in between them. They both collapsed in each other’s arms where they fell asleep.
In the wee hours of the morning… QUA woke up to clean himself off and slip on some boxers and basketball shorts. His head was hurting real bad, pounding uncontrollably but when he heard something on the side of the window, he knew he wasn’t tripping. Cautiously, he walked to the window barely touching the blinds, just enough for him to see. His heart dropped when he saw the apartment complex surrounded with SWAT. Right then and there, he knew who they were there for. He fucked up, somebody snitched.
He had to think fast cause he knew if he didn’t go out they were gonna eventually find their way in and find anyway reason to shoot his ass down and he couldn’t afford that with both his girls in the house. Like a man, with his chest out and head held high… he laced up his Jordan’s and shook Tasha to wake up. “Wake up T.”
“Huh? What happen?” She popped up noticing he was dressed. “Where you going?”
“SWAT is outside… I know that here for me and ion want them to just bust in here aiight. I gotta go.. and I may be gone for a little minute.”
She burst out crying with fear and panic. “QUA what did you do? What did you DO?!”
“I’ma be aiight T… I’mma try to beat this case with self defense. You know where all the money is at you don’t have nothing to worry about. Just use my phone to call my lawyer. I love you.” He kissed her and looked over to Lyric with sad eyes knowing he wasn’t going to see her for awhile… possibly a long time and it hurt him to his heart. He wished he could rewind the time cause he would’ve handled himself differently but what’s done is done.
Watching him walk out of the apartment, Tasha would never forget the look on his face as she held the sheets up to her. “I love you QUA…” were her last words to him.
Even when they had him cuffed and arrested, they still ransack the apartment looking for a weapon but only came up empty. Tasha’s heart broke into pieces.
The next morning… Tasha made sure she got her baby settled and tried her hardest to clean up the place. Turning on the News; she was going crazy waiting for QUA to call. She patiently waited in front of the TV to see what story’s were going to come up but when Ralph’s picture flashed the screen followed by QUA’s mug shot; everything went silent. She didn’t even have to hear the story to know what happened. She grabbed her ringing phone. “Hello?”
“Girl what the fuck going on with bro? this shit is crazy his face is all over the news!” Pepper went off on the other side of the receiver.
“I’m trying to find out now.”
Tru snatched the phone from Pepper. “Yo, if he did that shit, he’s going down for capitol murder. He killed fucking cop who’s waiting on trial for charges brought upon him dealing with you… not to mention that’s his fuckin’ uncle this shit crazy.”
“Tru…” She sighed broken hearted. “I know… I know.”
“Did you call his lawyer?”
“Calling now.”
“Aiight do that… I’m on top of everything else.”
When they hung up, that’s what she did… called his lawyer, who was already on top of it. “What about the retainer fee?” She asked him.
“It’s paid already… Quajay already put up for a rainy day. Don’t you worry your pretty little self.” Mr. Stern told her. “This is going to be tough but I’m going to do my best.” He assured her.
When she hung up, she knew there was nothing else she could do besides wait…. Wait for another fucking heartbreak cause all her life had been filled with one disappointment after the other.
Seventeen
Months had went by and they still hadn’t released QUA; she hadn’t even been able to see him cause he was in the hole. Locked down 23 hours and out for one hour of free time and that’s it. Tasha had become miserable. She wasn’t looking like herself anymore. She barely ate anything and her focus when it came to Lyric was almost nonexistent although she tried her best.
She was tired of complaining about her problems, she was tired of everything. She was too embarrassed to keep running to Pepper and Tru cause they were all now all she had. They had their own issues to deal with and it wasn’t fair to keep calling cause she was depressed. She couldn’t go out and do shit cause she didn’t have a baby sitter; no family; no help it was all on her. Her entire life had been thrown away. She sent QUA pictures of her and Lyric all the time to try and keep his spirits up.
At the end of the day though, she just felt like giving up… Lyric was about to turn one years old and she had nobody to celebrate with… meaning her father cause he should’ve been able to experience that. She was walking now and such a busy and happy baby. She was even more sad because Mr. Stern was suppose to call her today to let her know what the outcome was. QUA didn’t want to go to trial, he decided against it cause they were going to try to hit him with a life sentence. Ralph’s wife one the main witness. She was in the room all alone when QUA confronted Ralph and he didn’t even know. Apparently he didn’t go to kill him, he went to talk and whatever happened her ended up shooting him right between the eyes and there was no denying the fact that he did indeed do it.
Hours had went by when the phone finally rang and Mr. Stern was calling her. “Any news?” She asked.
“Well… they’ve downgraded the charge from Capitol murder to 2nd degree murder, which still isn’t good but at least we can try to cut that life sentence they wanted to throw at him. He’s a good guy… he doesn’t have any points and has only been arrested once before on a misdemeanor charge; so we’re working on it. Try to stay put.”
“Tell him I send my love…” She told him.
“Will do.”
Boom!Boom!Boom!
“Tasha open the door!” Pepper pound on the door. Tasha was in there knocked out and hadn’t heard the door nor the phone.
“Wait!” She yelled with sleep still in her voice; she made her way to the door simply unlocking it and walking away laying back on the couch.
Pepper walked in with a frown on her face and nose turned up. “This place is a mess yo… and it stinks in here when is the last time you changed your garbage?”
Tasha shrugged. She really didn’t want to hear Pepper’s mouth, she wanted to sleep. That’s all she did now days, deep depression brought on nothing but sleep and no energy. “Lower your voice.” She complained. Her hair was all over the place, and she was stink too.
“When is the last time you showered?” Pepper opened the windows. Lyric walked around with a shitty diaper on her and her unsnapped onesie was dirty too and she also looked like she hadn’t had a bath, but still, she walked around playing and smiling just as happy. Tasha didn’t answer her and Pepper shook her head. “Come on Tasha… get up yo. This aint even you. I’ve never seen you like this.”
“Yeah well… when you been through what I bee
n through you end up like this.” She mumbled.
Pepper walked away and took Lyric with her. “I’m taking the baby… till you get yourself together.”
Tasha hopped up grilling Pepper as her nostrils flared. “Pepper, if you take my kid out this house on God and everything I love I will fuck you up. You wanna be just like the rest of these muhfuckas… take everything away from me.”
“Humph bet that got you up…” She shook her head. “Go wash your ass while I clean the baby up and clean this damn apartment.” She told Tasha.
Later on that evening, Pepper was still there. She had cleaned up the entire apartment and even lit some candles to make it smell good. Lyric was clean and playing with toys. Tasha was clean and had even let Pepper style her hair in her traditional sleek ponytails and got her baby hairs back popping. When she was done with that, she cooked them a hot meal of lasagna, salad, and garlic bread but Tasha didn’t really eat much; she mostly picked over her food but Lyric sat in her highchair eating everything.