Sara's Choice

by Patty Schramm

  Terry shook herself out of her memory-laden thoughts. It did her no good to rehash the past. She focused on Felicia, who was, as with most mornings, being grumpy. It wouldn’t last, and it was kind of cute, but not today. She wanted to get to work on time. So she tried another tactic, though reasoning with an eight-year-old wasn’t always successful.

  “I know you want to watch Dora, but Mommy has to go to work and you have to go to school.”

  Felicia crossed her chubby arms over her chest and stuck out her bottom lip. “School sucks.” Her almond-shaped, hazel eyes stared up at Terry. Her round face was set and determined, as usual, showing Terry her ever-present stubborn streak. That streak and the hazel color of her eyes were stark reminders of Ann. So was the mousey-brown color of her fine, straight hair. Only the slant of her eyes and her short stature set her apart from Ann and everyone else.

  Terry considered admonishing her for saying “sucks” but chose to ignore it and grabbed Felicia’s backpack. “That might be the case, but you’re still going.” She took her by the hand, gently pulled her to her feet, and led her to her grey, Ford F-350 truck. The one and only luxury she afforded herself after moving to Whitehorse. It was sturdy, had four doors and 4-wheel drive. Something she sorely needed in the Yukon Territory.

  Felicia grumbled a little in her booster seat but soon was chattering away about the snow when they were on the road. Terry had trouble keeping up with her daughter’s moods.

  “Music please,” Felicia asked in her most polite voice.

  Terry smiled and turned up the volume so Felicia could sing along. It was Lady Gaga and thankfully one of her less racy tunes. Terry kept an eye on Felicia as she drove and enjoyed the fun she was having. By the time they got to the school, Felicia was grinning and excited to go see her friends. Terry handed her and the backpack off to Sally Johnson, the assistant principal. Sally was probably the same age as Terry’s mother, a bit overweight, with dark-brown skin and a ready smile. Terry wondered how the woman managed to always be in a good mood.

  Terry bent to give Felicia a goodbye kiss, but she was already running to the doors of the school.

  “She’s never still,” Sally said with a laugh. “I don’t know how you’re able to deal with her every day. I’m exhausted after a few minutes.”

  “If it weren’t for my mom, I don’t think I’d be able to function. That and the school being so close to my office. It’s a godsend.”

  Sally gave a mock bow. “We aim to please. Now if you’ll excuse me, I have cats to herd.”

  “And you wonder how I manage.”

  “At least I get paid for it.” Sally intercepted two boys heading for the playground. “Nope. Inside you two. Outside later.”

  Terry took a moment to watch Sally get the other kids into the building. She’d already lost sight of Felicia, who clearly wasn’t bothered to be leaving her mom behind. It made Terry a little sad to think there might come a time when her child wouldn’t need her so much.

  She took a deep, settling breath and got into her truck to make the ten-minute trip to her office. There were no appointments set for the morning, but she still hated being late. She unlocked the door at 9:05 and immediately heard her phone beep to let her know there was new voicemail.

  She hit the Play button and settled at her desk to listen.

  “Mrs. Alexander, this is Warwick Shue from Dresden Diamond Mines. I’d like to set up a conference call with you to discuss your report regarding our new site. Please return my call today to arrange this.”

  She jotted down the number and did a fist pump. This was the news she’d been waiting on. Her report gave the mine hope of opening a new operation 150 kilometers to the east of Dresden. Currently, they had to use the treacherous Ice Road to get major supplies in and out. Use of the Ice Road was limited to a few months in the heart of winter when the water between Yellowknife and Dresden was frozen.

  If they successfully located diamonds at the newly acquired location, they would be able to build a road to use year round, saving the company nearly a million dollars each year. Terry’s report highlighted two important things: where the diamonds might be and the cost of looking for them.

  She started to call Mr. Shue, but the office door opened and a welcome visitor stepped inside. Frank Trane sported a wide grin as he removed his Indiana Jones fedora and plopped his large frame onto one of the chairs in front of Terry’s desk. He practically glowed with excitement.

  “Congratulations,” he said.

  “Thanks. What did I do?”

  “Got the Dresden contract. I’d say I’m surprised, but that’d be a lie. I knew you’d get it.”

  Terry sat back in her chair and stared at Frank. “And you know this how? I haven’t called them yet.”

  “I know people. I keep telling you this.” He kept grinning despite the frown she tossed at him. “I knew I sold my business to the right person. You’ll be the most sought-after geologist in the territory. Plus, I’m here to make you an offer.”

  “Frank, did you have anything to do with me getting this contract? Like maybe calling in favors or something?”

  “Nope. You done that all on your own. All I did was call Warwick’s daddy to see how things were going. Theo and I went to school together.”

  “I’m not shocked one bit. Is there anyone in the territory you don’t know?”

  Frank pretended to think about that, and it made Terry laugh. “Pretty sure there are folks I don’t know. Just as sure they don’t matter all that much in the scheme of things. At least not to me.”

  “Gotcha. So, your offer?”

  “My wife is glad I sold the business, as you know. Retirement is supposed to be all fun and games and it is—in the summer. But it’s winter, and dammit, I’m bored.”

  “You came here to work, didn’t you?”

  He nodded. “I did indeed.”

  “I’d love that, but I can’t afford you.”

  “I don’t need to get paid. I just want to help out. Maybe with the stuff at Dresden. I’m familiar with those guys and thought you could use a hand. I did some reports for them before you got here, so I’m familiar with what they want. Not that I think you’re not capable and all, just that some of those meatheads can be hard to deal with.”

  She didn’t like that Frank felt the need to protect her, but his heart was in the right place. She was lucky to call him a friend and wouldn’t deny the man anything.

  “It’s a deal. Want to hang around while I call them back? We can make sure to plan the conference call when you’re available.”

  Frank’s face lit up, and Terry realized the good thing she’d done. Made him feel useful again. “Perfect. But first, let’s get some coffee. And a donut or two. I skipped breakfast.”

  “Sure, but I’m buying. It’s the least I can do.”

  He got up, placed his hat on his head, and tilted it slightly to the left. “Never turn down free coffee. It’s bad luck.”

  ****

  Starbucks was crowded, so Terry steered Frank to Liam’s Bakery. Frank practically drooled over the amazing assortment of donuts on display. The smell hit them as they entered and nearly gave Terry a sugar rush. Was it possible to gain weight by smelling sugar? Mixed with a hint of fresh coffee, the odor was divine and exactly what Terry needed. Sleep eluded her last night, as it did most nights, and a serious pick-me-up was in order.

  She made her selection and waited patiently for Frank to get his. Once finished, he gallantly offered to carry the box of too many confections back to the office, while Terry was in charge of the coffee.

  She stole a sip of her drink before leaving. At that same moment, her eyes caught sight of the reason for her sleepless nights. Sara Hyatt opened the door, and their eyes locked. Terry’s breath caught, and she was unable to form any words. It wasn’t the first time she’d run into Sara, but it was the first time they’d come face-to-face.

  Frank deftly avoided crashing into Terry, who
had yet to move. He slipped around her and held the door open. “C’mon before the coffee gets cold.”

  Terry glanced at him, and that was enough to break the spell. Sara moved away from her without a word. Not that Terry blamed her. She’d hurt Sara, and there was nothing to be done to fix it. It hadn’t been her plan, just the cruelty of the real world robbing her of happiness. Again.

  Frank muttered something about the coffee. Terry hurried out the door to join him. “There’s a microwave in the office. We can heat the coffee up.”

  “Not the same,” he said. “I don’t like radiation mixed with my caffeine.”

  “Have I ever told you how weird you are?”

  Frank seemed to enjoy that more than he should. “You haven’t. But I like it. I can be weird. It suits me.”

  “That it does.” Terry glanced behind them at the bakery. She couldn’t see Sara but wondered if she watched them leave. She was probably glad they were gone. And that broke Terry’s heart more than she thought possible. Her mind easily slipped back to earlier times…

  The sun shone brightly against the lake water and Terry adjusted her sunglasses. They’d borrowed Frank’s boat for the day and were enjoying a nice swim with Liv and Grace. Sara was in the water with Liv, and the two of them were splashing and wrestling like little kids.

  Grace took a seat on the deck beside Terry. “They’ll never grow up.”

  “Nope. I think it’s a good thing, though. Keeps them young.”

  Grace smirked. “Keeps me feeling like I’m raising two kids sometimes.”

  “Heh. Try doing it for real. You’d probably find those two much easier to deal with.”

  “I’m sure you’re right. How’s Felicia doing?”

  Terry sighed. “Her sunburn is fading, but you’d never know it bothered her unless she stops to take a breath. I’ve never seen a kid with so much energy in my life. Mom practically had to hold her down to put a layer of sunscreen on her this morning. I’m not repeating the whole staying-up-all-night-because-her-skin-hurts thing any time soon.”

  “I bet not. You know, you ought to bring her over Sunday. We’d love to meet her.” Grace studied her for a moment. “You do know she’s as welcome as you are, right?”

  Terry smiled, glad Sara’s friends were so accepting of her. “I do and thanks. I want to wait a bit before I introduce her around. She gets attached to people easily, and the move here from Quebec’s been hard on her.” She watched Liv and Sara still giggling and splashing each other. “I don’t want to sound harsh, but I need her to meet Sara first. If things work out, then I’ll introduce her around. I know she’d love meeting you two.”

  “It’s not harsh at all. It’s smart, really.” Grace leaned forward and grabbed a couple of beers out of the cooler. “You’re a good mom, Terry. That much is obvious.”

  “Thanks.” Terry clinked her bottle against Grace’s. “And thanks for inviting us today. I forgot how beautiful it is in the middle of nowhere.”

  “It’s been an adjustment for me. I’ve lived in big cities most of my life, and I like the quiet. I used to come every summer to visit Ojiichan, but I spent the majority of my time at the mine.”

  “Ojiichan?”

  “Grandpa. It’s Japanese.”

  “Oh cool. Sara mentioned you’re something of a linguist.”

  Grace shrugged. “It’s my thing. It’s what I did in the army.”

  “Are you going to do that here? I don’t know how much need there is for Japanese translations.”

  “Maybe not Japanese, but I’m good with pretty much any language. I’m learning French right now. Thought I’d start there and maybe go back to the Arabic I was studying a few years ago.”

  “I took six years of French in school and can barely form a sentence. You are officially my new hero.”

  “Who’s your hero?” Sara asked as she climbed onto the boat dripping wet.

  “Gracie.”

  “Ah, well that’s acceptable.” Sara plopped onto Terry’s lap, nearly causing her to spill her beer. She wrapped her arms around Terry, who enjoyed that Sara’s breasts were practically in her face. Her bikini barely covered the important parts.

  “You’re getting me wet,” Terry said as she slipped her arms around Sara.

  “That’s the best line ever.”

  “I got a lot more lines than that.” Terry trailed kisses along Sara’s chest, to her breasts, brushing against her taut nipples. “Want to hear them?”

  “Hell yes.”

  “Get a room!” Liv yelled once she joined them. She flicked a towel at Sara and caught her in the arm. “You two are like a couple of randy teenagers.”

  “Says the woman giggling like a teenager just a few minutes ago,” Grace said. She got up from her chair and took the towel from Liv before she flicked anyone else with it. “You are a great big toddler.”

  “Says who?”

  “Says me. Now come on. You’re going to help me get lunch together.” Grace dragged her toward the galley with Liv protesting all the way.

  Terry snickered. “I like those two. I’m glad we came out here today.”

  “They’re good people.” Sara leaned into her and placed a kiss on Terry’s forehead. “It’s always fun when we’re out. Best of all, Liv made sure to tell me you meet with her approval.”

  “Was I in need of approval?”

  “Sort of.” Sara pulled back so they were eye-to-eye. Terry felt a stirring in her stomach at the way Sara’s eyes looked right through her. Like she knew her every thought and feeling Terry had. “Livvy’s my best friend. Has been since high school. I’ve never dated anyone she didn’t like. I can’t explain it, but I always seem to want her approval. It means more to me than that of my parents.”

  “I don’t mind. If it means anything, she meets with my approval as well.”

  Sara smiled and Terry’s heart sped up a little.

  “Is it weird that I want to kiss you right now?” she asked.

  “Nope. I think it’d be weird if you didn’t.”

  Terry met Sara’s lips in a long, sultry kiss. She pulled Sara closer as the kiss deepened and wished they were alone. She’d have taken Sara on the deck of that boat. More importantly, it was that moment she realized her relationship with Sara had moved beyond casual. Right then, in the middle of a lake, with Sara’s friends in the galley, Terry realized she was very much in love with Sara.

  They pulled apart, and as their eyes met again, Terry wondered what the hell she was going to do about it.

  ****

  Terry sorted through the pile of papers on her desk, glad the day would soon end. Shirley, her mom, had just called to let her know that Felicia was installed in front of the TV playing with Elmo, her mom’s terrier. The little beast loved the little human, and Terry regretted not being there to see them be cute. At least her mom would take pictures.

  When she lived in Quebec, Terry struggled to keep a balance between work and home, needing to send Felicia to daycare for at least two hours every day after school. Shirley was the reason Terry moved back to Whitehorse from Quebec. She missed her mom, and in the three years since Ann died, she’d been unable to cope on her own. She was so lucky Shirley had flexible hours and stepped in to pick up Felicia when Terry couldn’t.

  Last year, Terry’s father died of a heart attack. She offered to move to Whitehorse then, but her mom wouldn’t have it. Terry’d made a home in Quebec, and it would be hard on Felicia to move. At least, that was Shirley’s reasoning at the time. But Terry understood the hardship on her mother being there alone. Within six months, she made the decision to live in Whitehorse.

  Shirley fought her at first but eventually gave up. It was Shirley’s idea for Terry to speak to Frank about buying his business. He wanted to retire, and she used the money from the sale of her house in Quebec as a down payment.

  Frank was well established as a geologist in the Yukon. He’d built a solid reputation over the last thirty
years. Because he and Shirley were friends since high school, he’d happily sold the business to Terry along with his list of clients. He sanctioned Terry’s skills to everyone he spoke to. His word alone gave her a decent start. She expected to be making a profit in another year or so.

  But right now, every extra penny she had went to a lawyer. And it cut her deeper than she expected it to.

  She straightened a pile of paperwork and decided that was enough for one day. Her mind wasn’t in it, and she’d get little done tonight. It was already dark outside, and she was beyond starved. Two stale donuts did not a good lunch make. She stood to get her coat and, through the window, noticed someone crossing the street in front of her office.

  Her heart skipped a beat. The thin figure, wrapped in a long, white coat, was Sara. She had her head down and didn’t see Terry watching her. She seemed preoccupied and nearly ran into someone as she trudged along. Terry briefly considered offering her a ride home, but she was certain that kindness would be refused.

  And she didn’t blame her. Not after what Terry did. Maybe if Sara knew the reason for the breakup, she’d understand. It wasn’t like Terry had any real choice. But how could she even begin to explain? Her world was falling apart, and she’d managed to shove away the one person she needed the most.

  Terry’s gaze fell to a photo of Felicia. She picked up the small, wooden frame with the “World’s Best Mom” carved into the bottom. Felicia was nestled in her arms, moments after being born. Terry still wore pale-blue scrubs and looked like hell, but she grinned at the memory. That instant she and Felicia bonded. They didn’t need DNA to be mother and child, just those few seconds of knowing and loving each other.

  She put the frame in its place, her eyes never leaving the squirming baby in her arms. Felicia was a handful. She didn’t always mind. She was an eight-year-old growing up without both parents. A fact Terry could do little about.