No Regrets: Jani Kay (Firebird Trilogy Book 2)

by Jani Kay

  Of course Giovanni had something to say about that too. “That’s such a waste. This is a house that should be filled with love and laughter, and bambinos running around.”

  He was right. That was why my parents had bought the house in the first place, but after years of unsuccessfully trying to have a family, they decided to adopt instead. Lucky for me. Yet, they never gave up on their dream to have a lot of kids running around the place, asking me at every visit when I was going to give them grandchildren. I’d always laugh and deflect their question with a lighthearted joke because I didn’t want to break their hearts by telling them I never wanted children of my own. Until Rebecca.

  I grabbed hold of the cold bottle of wine and steered Rebecca toward the dining room. As much as I enjoyed Giovanni, I wanted her to myself.

  “You never said this was your house. I should’ve guessed,” Becca said as she sat down. Her eyes glistened. “What else don’t I know about you, Max?”

  I smiled at her. “That, my lovely Rebecca, is exactly the point of tonight’s dinner. There are things you should know about me. But first, let’s eat.”

  Giovanni walked in as if on cue. He placed a plate piled high with pasta in front of each of us. Steam rose from the plate and I watched as Rebecca closed her eyes and sniffed. God, she is adorable.

  I poured wine into a glass, swirling and tasting before filling both glasses.

  A minute later, Giovanni was back with a bottle of olive oil that he drizzled over each plate with fanfare. Then he piled shaved parmesan cheese on top of that before cracking fresh pepper over each.

  “I say goodnight. The dessert is in the refrigerator. You will love it—my mamma’s Tiramisu.”

  “Goodnight, Giovanni, and thanks,” I said, happy we’d be alone at last. Placing her napkin on her lap, Rebecca echoed my words.

  “A toast,” I said as I raised my glass. She picked hers up and held it to mine. “To the best company I could ever wish for.”

  She smiled, a rosy tint spreading over her cheeks that she couldn’t hide even in the candlelight. “Thank you. Salute,” she said softly.

  I wanted change—our relationship to grow.

  Our glasses clinked and we sipped the wine, neither of us taking our eyes off the other. I'd waited for this night for so long and now that it was happening, I wanted to savor it, take my time and enjoy every moment. So far Rebecca wasn’t resisting or challenging me. As many times as I’d tried to have this conversation with her in the past, it felt right to talk and get it out in the open. Her mood was relaxed and she appeared more at ease and receptive than ever. I felt confident she’d hear me out and give me a fighting chance. She has to. The redhead was tenacious, fiery and intense—everything I loved about this woman who was my equal, but fuck, she never made it easy.

  Tonight, Rebecca would be mine.

  After I explained everything, nothing would stand between us any longer.

  The time had come.

  Chapter 10 – Rebecca

  I took another sip of wine. “What do you mean she...she’s not your wife?” My head jerked up and my gaze collided with sapphire pools of darkness.

  “I’ve never been married. Not to Natasha, not to anyone.” The tick in his jaw jumped.

  I stared into his eyes, looking for traces of humor. This must be a joke. A joke on me.

  “I-I don’t understand.” It was nearly impossible to formulate coherent sentences when my mind was spinning.

  “I’m not married. Natasha is not my wife,” he repeated, his tone measured out as if explaining to a child. He filled his glass and drank half of it.

  “You’ve been, what, living a lie?”

  What about seeing her in his arms with my own eyes? What about all those tabloids pictures of them together? Pictures don’t lie, do they?

  He shook his head. “It's all a ruse. A façade. A well-orchestrated business deal.” His face softened ever so slightly.

  “But why?”

  His voice was flat. “To keep the media happy. To stop women from hounding me. For convenience.”

  “That’s one hell of a scam.” Anger surged through me. I’d believed he was married for so long. Duped. Wasn’t I the fool?

  Hurt flashed in his eyes. “It's hard to explain. It was a good idea at the time, but it's superfluous. Things have changed. I have changed.”

  I sucked in a breath. “What do you mean? How have they changed?”

  He pushed to his feet and walked toward the window, his hand raking through his hair. He stared at the moon for what felt like centuries before he replied.

  “I made a deal with Natasha three years ago. I was tired of being relentlessly hounded by the tabloids—always speculating if I would get married, making wild assumptions. If I was with a woman, they would hunt her down and plaster pictures everywhere. If I backed off, rumors went around I was gay because I never married. It affected the business. Share prices went down every time a story broke. The board was concerned. They urged me to settle down.”

  I squirmed in my chair, my heart racing as I digested what he was saying.

  His shoulders slumped forward. He looked disconnected, speaking as if no one were in the room. “I had a long hard think about it. There was no one I wanted to commit my life to. Sure, I had a lot of women I could pick from, all eager to be Mrs. Maxwell Grant. But believe it or not, I’m an old-fashioned kind of guy. My adoptive parents have been married for nearly forty years and still going strong. They adore one another. If I couldn’t have that, I wasn’t going to settle for less.”

  Standing against the cold glass window, my heart ached for him. He looked so lonely. I pushed up from the chair and moved closer to him.

  “I had to do something. I couldn’t let the business suffer because I didn’t want to commit to a woman.” His jaw tightened, his hand running along the back of his neck. I sensed his despair, knowing the lengths he would go to protect his empire.

  “Then a brilliant idea hit me. At least, it was brilliant at the time.” He laughed, but it was humorless and hollow.

  He grimaced as he paced the room. “I entered a contract with an up-and-coming young model. She wanted the exposure and fame I could give her as Mrs. Grant. I needed arm candy to portray a settled life to the business world. A win-win situation for both parties.”

  I leaned back on the console table, my hands gripping the cold marble for support.

  “Is the relationship real?” I whispered.

  I have to know.

  He pressed his lips together. “The contract stated that she would use my name to propel her career. I would support her financially. In return, she had to deliver...wifely duties.”

  He narrowed his eyes as if to gauge my reaction. I stood frozen, my knuckles white, gripping the cold marble as if my life depended on it. My breathing slowed to the point of almost stopping. If it weren’t for my heart hammering against my ribs, I’d believe I was having an out of body experience.

  “I couldn’t be caught with other women. That would cause an outrageous scandal, and she wasn’t allowed to fornicate with anyone but me in case she was caught out. She’s a beautiful woman. I could work with that. Fuck her when I needed release, without the emotional involvement. A perfect plan.” I flinched at his words. “Until—you.”

  He closed the distance between us and lifted my face to his, his eyes burning into mine. I searched their depths for the answers, unwilling to draw conclusions, in case I was wrong. The heat radiating from his body reflected onto my limp body, warming the chill in my veins.

  “Me?”

  “You.” A slow lazy smile spread across his face. “The most infuriating, rebellious and obstinate woman I’ve ever known.”

  All the breath in my body left my lungs. “Oh.” Does he despise me that much he’s now making fun of me?

  “You. The woman I want in my bed and my life. Every day from this minute.”

  Maxwell leaned in and placed his lips on mine. His palms rested on my temples, his long f
ingers in my hair. His mouth moved against mine.

  “I’ve told you before. I want you, Rebecca.” He pulled me into his embrace, pressing his erection into my stomach to make his point.

  My mind whirled, spinning out of control. I was over being ‘wanted’ without commitment. I liked sex as much as any other normal person, but I wasn’t going to be used by a man who only wanted me that way. I wasn’t an object, a thing to be collected and then trashed.

  If Maxwell had grown tired of the current ‘Mrs. Grant’, and if he thought he could simply replace her with me, how soon would he throw me away too?

  There was probably an escape clause in the contract with Natasha—I even felt sorry for her. And if Maxwell thought I’d sign a similar contract, he was fucking dreaming.

  “No.” I pushed against his chest.

  “Rebecca,” he groaned, “still fighting me. You can stop now. I've explained everything. I’m not married.”

  “That doesn’t change anything! You still have a contract with her. It may not be a legal marriage, but you still fuck her—as if she IS your wife. Let me go!”

  He responded by banding his arms tighter around me; his mouth crashing down hard on mine. I wanted to resist. Wanted to fight him, but I found myself melting into him, devoured by his passion. His thick, hard cock throbbed against me, causing liquid fire to spread through my body, every fiber in my being screaming out for him. I wanted him as much as he wanted me. The realization shook me to my core.

  “No, Maxwell!” I pulled my head back and pushed against his rock-hard abs. “Let me go!”

  His arms fell to his sides, his mouth dropping open in disbelief. Taking a step backward, his eyes ablaze, he gritted his teeth. “You want me too. I felt it. Your body betrays your words, Rebecca.”

  I closed my eyes unable to look at him for fear he would see the truth there. Stepping further away from him, I crossed my arms over my heavy breasts and hardened nipples in an attempt to hide my arousal. I needed distance between us so I could think clearly.

  “You can't possibly think I will agree to a similar contract with you.” I opened my eyes and stared into confused eyes. “Just so you can throw me away when you tire of me and find a better proposition later. I'm not some business deal. I don’t need you.”

  His jaw worked overtime, clenching tightly as he looked at me in disbelief.

  “But I need you, and I will have you. You can run, but you can't hide. I will find you.” His arms were crossed, his jaw set, his eyes blazing. “You. Will. Be. Mine. There is no escape, Rebecca.”

  “Not till hell freezes over.” I pivoted on my heels and made my way to the elevator. I pressed the button, praying for the doors to open instantly so I could escape before my resolve crumbled.

  No such luck. His long strides caught up with me. He grabbed hold of my wrists. “Stop running, Rebecca. Face the truth. I want you. You want me. It couldn’t be simpler.”

  I turned to him, lashing out. “It may be simple for you. You always get what you want, but not this time. I’m not for sale. I won’t be your possession to fuck when you need it and then throw me away—like Natasha.” My throat burned with tears.

  “Is that what you think?” He blinked a few times, incredulous.

  “What else can I think?” I bit out, determined not to cry front of him.

  “Rebecca.” He reached out and pulled me to him gently, his arms folding around me once more. He rested his chin on the crown of my head. My arms dangled by my sides, so I couldn’t push him away. If only it didn’t feel so good in his embrace.

  “If you just listen to what I’m trying to say. Yes, I want you desperately. Yes, I would be lying if I said I didn’t want to fuck you. I've wanted to fuck you from the very first moment I laid eyes on you.”

  A sigh from deep within escaped his lips. “So I’m prepared to take you any way I can have you. It’s me who is at your mercy. It’s me who is afraid you will tire of me, that I’m not enough for you.” He lifted my face to his. “Look at me, Rebecca.”

  His gaze locked with mine, enveloping me. Nothing else existed in that moment but us.

  “You. I want to be with you for the rest of my life. For real this time.”

  It was my turn for my mouth to gape open in disbelief.

  Chapter 11 – Maxwell

  She had to believe me. I couldn't blow it now.

  “Rebecca, I've been waiting for you all my life. I knew from the first time I looked into your eyes that it was you. You knew it too. You just chose to ignore it.”

  If only Rebecca realized how she held my whole life in her petite hands. That she could crush my heart with a single word. This was exactly the reason I’d never wanted to become emotionally invested in anyone. It was too damn complicated.

  But I couldn't help myself, even though I was going against my own rules.

  A slow blush spread over her beautiful face, her trembling lips still swollen from my earlier kiss. She looked so fucking vulnerable.

  Mergers. Acquisitions. I chewed them up and spat them out, but this woman had me at her mercy. I was the one at risk here. Christ.

  “Maxwell.” She peered up at me from under her long, silky eyelashes that made my knees go weak. I wanted to protect her from getting hurt; I didn’t want to be the one inflicting the pain.

  “Yes?”

  “I didn’t know,” she whispered, tears pooling in her doe-like eyes.

  “Well, you know now. I've been trying to tell you, but the words don’t come out right. Before I can finish, you always run. But this time I won’t let you,” I growled. Her eyes widened as she bit into her bottom lip.

  “You drive me crazy, Rebecca. As soon as I think I’m making headway with you, something happens and you disappear.”

  For once, she was listening. Her hands came to rest on my hips, and just that gentle gesture of trust sent my blood roaring through my veins. I pulled her closer, wanting to envelop her in my arms and hold her there so she couldn't run ever again. My nostrils filled with her sweet aroma and I could think of nothing but her in my arms.

  Already panting with want, I dipped my head to kiss her. Slowly. Gently. I didn’t want her frightened and pulling away. Her lips were soft and giving beneath mine. Her body yielding and melting into mine. She felt so good against me, the perfect fit.

  I lifted my head and kissed her eyelids one by one, then the tip of her nose, nuzzling along her jawline. Instinctively, my mouth travelled back to those soft lips, but with more intensity this time. My tongue slowly licked along her lips, seeking permission. She opened slightly, still afraid. I had to rein it in even while my raging hormones tore through me like a hurricane. I wanted to possess her—all of her. My need for her was more than I’d ever experienced with any woman, but I deliberately slowed myself down.

  Her hand slid around to the nape of my neck and her fingers speared into my hair, tugging hard. Unable to suppress a loud groan, I pulled her closer, letting my tongue dart into her silky mouth.

  Her tongue responded to mine. Languid strokes tasted me. She tangled her leg around mine as if she wanted me closer. I pushed my erection into her unashamedly. I’d been waiting so long for this.

  I walked her backwards to the couch and pushed her down gently. She looked up at me, her skin glistening with a fine mist of perspiration. Her eyes even wider. She bit into her lower lip as if she was unsure of what to do next. I quickly covered her body with mine. Partly because I was in desperate need to feel her beneath me, and partly to keep her from running.

  “Rebecca,” I murmured against her lips as I stroked her tongue once more. I couldn't get enough of her taste. She rested her hands on my biceps, her nails digging into my skin. My temperature soared at her touch, reaching fever pitch as my cock throbbed against her stomach.

  Letting me kiss her jawline once again, she lifted her chin to give me access to her neck. I sucked and kissed my way down her throat to the rise of her breasts. Her breath hitched as I slowly unbuttoned her blouse, my mo
uth never leaving her skin. I peeled the blouse off her shoulders with slow deliberate movements. She moaned and threw her head back against the soft leather. Her breasts heaved below the cream satin restraints of her bra. My God, she was so sensuous I could come just looking at her.

  Her trembling fingers fumbled as they unbuttoned my shirt. I watched, as if in slow motion, as she pushed the shirt aside, the tips of her fingers brushing against my chest, setting it on fire.

  My palms glided over her silky skin, in awe of her softness. Reaching behind her back, I expertly undid the clasp of her bra. She gazed at me as she placed her hand on my chest. For a few heartbeats time stood still. Was she going to stop me?

  A deep pink blush spread over her skin—from her breasts, up her neck and over her cheeks. Her eyes locked onto mine, searching for answers, reading me until something stirred deep inside my soul.

  This was a moment of no return for us both.

  She took my hand in hers and pressed it to her chest, the wild beating of her heart beneath my fingertips. Her hands glided to my shoulders, allowing me to slip the bra off her arms and discard it onto the floor. I gasped as her pink nipples hardened into tight peaks.

  Sweet Lord, she’s fucking gorgeous.

  I couldn't resist. Reverently smoothing my hands over her breasts, I cupped them while running the pads of my thumbs over her nipples. She moaned softly, her lips parted, glistening in the soft light. Her breasts, even though heavy from her arousal, fitted perfectly into my hands.

  “Rebecca, you were made for me.” I leaned forward to suck a nipple into my mouth. God, this was all I ever wanted—and more.

  I lifted her in my arms and carried her up the stairs to my bedroom. She buried her face in my neck, hot panting breaths escaping her lips and caressing over my skin. I stopped on the landing and slid her body down my torso. Her legs hooked around my hips, her arms tightening around my neck. Pushing my shirt aside, she pressed her full breasts against my skin. I kissed her until we were both breathless and our chests heaving.