Hold Me: Music For The Heart - Book One

by Faith Starr

  “I’m sure you get your fair share of both.”

  “Ooh, look who’s being judgmental.” I couldn’t help but tease.

  “I’m sorry. That was totally inappropriate.” She clasped her hands together and set them on her lap. She started fidgeting with them.

  “Eh, doesn’t faze me. I can’t say I’m lacking, but I’m also not the type to bring a stranger into my bed every night.”

  “Every other?” Her tone was playful.

  “Damn. You sure have your stereotypes about the musician lifestyle set in stone.”

  “Do you disagree with my generalization?”

  “No. But it’s not as crazy as television and movies make it out to be. At least it doesn’t have to be. It all depends on the person.”

  “How so?”

  Fuck. She wasn’t kidding around. She was totally fixated on this particular subject.

  “I can only speak for me, Trevor, and Logan. A lot of times the bus takes off as soon as a show ends, so we can get to our next destination in time to prep for our next one. That doesn’t leave much time left over for entertaining. Our days are filled with sound checks, writing new material, radio visits, working out, and plenty of other stuff to keep us busy. Once the sun goes down, it’s showtime. We’re usually exhausted by the time we hit the bus afterward.”

  She nodded as though processing my words. “I guess it doesn’t leave much room for outside relationships and such either.”

  “When something’s important to me, I give it attention, no matter what it is. Speaking of which, are you in a relationship?” That’s a question that had an asterisk next to it on my get-to-know-a-woman list.

  She shook her head. “No.”

  “And why is a beautiful woman such as yourself single?” I loved how pink her cheeks became every time she got embarrassed, which she clearly was at the moment.

  “I guess my life too is a bit busy.”

  “How so?”

  She gawked.

  “Is that not an appropriate question for me to ask?”

  She sighed, relaxing into the sofa. “No. I’m sorry for reacting so harshly. I guess this situation feels kind of strange to me.” She twisted her fingers up in knots and surveyed the small space around us.

  “Why?”

  “Maybe we should head back to the arena. Lily will be wondering where I am.”

  “What’s going on?”

  From out of nowhere, nervous energy consumed her. She stood and looked toward the exit, ready to bolt.

  “Hey.” I got up and stepped toward her. “I apologize if I said something to offend you. “

  “You didn’t.”

  I didn’t buy it.

  “Then what’s the problem?”

  “The problem is that you’re a famous rock star.”

  I had no clue what she meant. “So?”

  “So, why the small talk? The let’s-get-to-know-each-other bit. I don’t get it.”

  Ah. Now I did. She thought the only reason I had her on the bus was because I wanted to fuck her. Sure, I did, but I also wanted to get to know her. Something about this woman stirred me up inside, and not just the pressure in my cock. I couldn’t put my finger on it, but I had a gut feeling about her. Besides, I’d given her my word earlier, no inappropriate touching.

  “I find you interesting. I don’t get to engage in many “normal” conversations with women.”

  “I’m sure you don’t.”

  And there came her judgmental tone again. But this time, it came out in more of a mocking nature.

  7

  Teva

  Here I stood inside Joey Fine’s tour bus, a stupid move on my part. What woman in her right mind went alone with a man to his place, one whom she’d recently met, knew nothing about, and to top it off, was famous?

  Plainly, that stupid woman would be me.

  The whole engaging-me-in-trite-conversation shtick he had going baffled me. But something about him intrigued me, and it wasn’t his celebrity status. I couldn’t place it but wanted to follow my nagging curiosity.

  Then again, maybe this whole getup of showing me his tour bus and partaking in friendly chitchat was his idea of foreplay. Sure, he said he’d keep his hands to himself. But did I believe him?

  For some crazy reason, I did. I also got the impression he was a nice guy.

  “Do you still want to head back to the arena, or are you game for continuing with our “normal” conversation?”

  The man was adorable, both physically and in his mannerisms and gestures. Damn, Joey Fine.

  “I guess we could continue talking a little more. I wouldn’t want you to miss out on the opportunity to have an intellectual conversation with a woman.” I smiled and got cozy again on the couch. He did the same, respecting my space and keeping a cushion between us.

  “Wow. What man has burned you?”

  What a personal question to ask a near stranger. One I certainly wouldn’t answer.

  “You asked me why I’m single. The reason is I work full time and am enrolled in graduate school part time to continue my training.”

  He acknowledged me with a slight nod. “I see. I guess that doesn’t leave much time for anything else.”

  It seemed to me like he understood where I was coming from and more importantly, he showed real interest.

  “You’re correct. When I’m not working, I’m usually studying. The little free time I do have I spend writing.”

  His eyes lit up. “What kind of writing?”

  I shrugged off his question. “Poetry, drawing.”

  “Ah, a poet and an artist. It’s no wonder you caught my attention.” He smiled from ear to ear.

  “Do you enjoy doing those things?”

  “I’m a songwriter so naturally I love writing. The artwork I’ll pass on, unless you consider stick figures art.”

  His comment made me grin.

  “Art is art. There’s no right or wrong way to do it. It’s a form of personal expression.”

  “You obviously haven’t seen my attempt at art. But thanks for the ego boost. So what exactly are you studying in school? I remember you mentioning earlier when your friend passed out that you’re a nurse.”

  Right when I went to answer his question the bus door opened. A deep voice directed a giggling girl up the stairs. A brown-haired stick figure wearing a barely-there dress, if one could call the gold piece of spandex she had on that, with huge implants sans a bra, staggered into the room, high or drunk, possibly both. I fidgeted on the sofa, highly uncomfortable with her presence.

  I had met Trevor, so this must have been the other band member, Logan, on the woman’s tail.

  Logan’s gaze went to Joey’s. “Oh, I didn’t know you had company.”

  Some kind of hidden message passed between the two men.

  “Well, I do.”

  “I don’t mind an audience.” The twig figure raised her brows in our direction.

  “I think we’ll pass, but thanks for the offer.”

  Joey’s tone didn’t sound cordial at all. Good, because I couldn’t have said it better myself.

  “Show me where you sleep. I want to lie down on a rock star’s bed.” The woman bounced up and down, her breasts bouncing right along with her.

  Jeez. Here I got to witness the rock ’n’ roll lifestyle Joey and I had just spoken about firsthand.

  “Come. I’ll show you. See you two later.”

  Logan waved goodbye and led the girl to the back of the bus, the part I hadn’t seen yet and had no plan to.

  Joey studied me. “I see the wheels turning in your head.”

  “You don’t know me well enough to see the wheels turning.” I kept my voice calm, trying not to act defensive.

  “And you don’t know me well enough to make judgments about my character based on generalizations you have preset in your mind.”

  He caught me off guard with his brilliant insight. “You’re right. You’ve impressed me yet again.”

  “Again? Y
ou mean I’ve been working my ass off to impress you, only to find out I didn’t need to try?”

  “Not in the way you think.” I smiled.

  “Please elaborate.”

  He leaned back against the couch and crossed his leg over his knee with his arm slung over one of the cushions, far enough not to touch me but close enough that if I moved slightly to the left, there would be contact.

  “I’m floored by your talent. Your lyrics are phenomenal. And I’m touched you’ve kept true to your word.”

  “Thank you for the compliment about my songwriting. My sister, Dani, assists with some of the songs. As far as being true to my word, that’s me in a nutshell. I don’t play games. I say it like I see it.”

  “That’s good to know.” I didn’t understand why, because I seriously doubted once he and I said our goodbyes, I’d ever see or hear from him again. Which was another reason why I didn’t want to leave.

  “Ah!”

  In unison, the two of us looked toward the back of the bus.

  “Yes! Yes! Logan!”

  Oh for crying out loud.

  Heat rose in my cheeks. I pinched the bridge of my nose and closed my eyes, hoping that would help relieve me of my mortification. When I opened them, I discovered Joey standing in front of me.

  “Come. You don’t have to be subjected to this. You’re far too good for that.”

  Holy crap. Joey was so sweet.

  He gestured toward the front of the bus, being ever so mindful not to touch me. He did follow closely behind me, though, as we cruised back to the arena.

  Lily ran over and almost knocked me down. “Teva! I’ve been searching for you everywhere! Where have you been?”

  She grinned when she caught sight of Joey. I wanted to slap it right off her face.

  “I gave her a tour of the grounds.”

  How thoughtful of Joey to step in.

  “I bet you did, loverboy.”

  My mouth fell open. Lily’s tone insinuated Joey and I had gone off and done something sexual.

  “Lily!”

  “Sorry.”

  No she wasn’t.

  “Anyway, while you’ve been off sightseeing, I’ve been shadowing one of the roadies.” Her eyes lit up. “He has more work to do and wants me to hang around and watch. Are you cool with that?”

  Leave it to Lily to hook up with a roadie. Sadly, it didn’t surprise me in the least.

  “I have to work tomorrow, and we only have one car.”

  “I can take you home,” Joey jumped in and offered.

  “See, Joey Fine can take you home.” Lily’s eyes lit up brighter.

  “In what, your tour bus?” I hadn’t meant to sound so sarcastic.

  “No, smartass. We have a driver,” he quipped.

  “Of course you do.” I sighed at the insanity of the situation.

  “I just have to grab my bag from the bus. I’m officially off tour and on break, at least for the time being.”

  He said this with sheer pleasure. I gave him an odd look. I think his enthusiasm had more to do with the prospect of taking me home than being on break.

  “I didn’t agree yet.” I busted his chops. A little humility never hurt anyone.

  “What’s there to think about? Joey Fine wants to take you home.” Lily enunciated every syllable.

  My God. Did she honestly think I didn’t get it? I hoped Joey didn’t see the evil eye I gave her.

  “Let me have your keys. I’ll have your car home by the time you need to leave for work.” Lily stuck her palm out in front of me.

  “How many drinks have you had?”

  “One whiskey—maybe two. But I’ll wait until I’m sober before driving. You know I wouldn’t go down that road.”

  “Fine.” I retrieved my keys from my purse and dropped them in her hand.

  “I guess that means I’m taking you home.” Joey wore a grin from ear to ear.

  My palms started to sweat profusely at the idea of being alone with him at my place.

  “I guess so.” Against my better judgment I agreed.

  My behavior with him was so unlike me: entering a strange guy’s dwelling and allowing him to take me home. Stupid, stupid, stupid.

  “Great. Let’s go get my bag. See ya later, Lily.”

  He grabbed my hand and pulled me along with him, giving Lily a backward wave.

  “What happened to hands off?” Yet I still kept mine in his when I posed the question.

  “Say the word, and I’ll let go.”

  I paused.

  “It’s not a difficult decision to make, Teva.”

  “Fine. You can hold my hand.”

  “Really? Golly gee.” He flashed me a boyish grin.

  What a character.

  We left the arena and returned to the bus. We passed the couches we had been lounging on just a short time ago. We were now in the bunk section. Silence fell upon us. I wondered whether Logan still had his flavor of the night in his bed with him. I didn’t require a visual of the two of them going at it to inform me either. Thanks, but no thanks.

  “This is Logan’s bunk.”

  The sheets were pulled down and crumpled, the smell of sex lingering in the air.

  “I guess it served its purpose for the night,” I joked.

  “I would say so.” He nodded, knowing damn well what I meant.

  “This is Trevor’s.”

  His bed was neatly made, his things tidy around it, more to my liking.

  “And here’s mine.”

  I took a gander at his minute habitat. Talk about a tiny house.

  He had his bed neatly made as well. A bag of graham crackers sat next to his pillow.

  “I love graham crackers.”

  A hint of embarrassment made its presence known, which I found adorable. So adorable it melted my heart.

  “I can’t believe you spent months in this little space. I would go insane.”

  “It is what it is.” He started shoving clothes inside two duffel bags. “I’ll be right back. Hang tight. I have to use the restroom.”

  He disappeared down the short hall.

  The bus far exceeded my expectations. It resembled a well-designed Winnebago. From what I could tell so far, it had all the necessities required for an extended road trip.

  I sat on his bed and scoped the scene in his private bunk. There wasn’t much to see other than a few notebooks, one of them open with some writing in it. I didn’t want to pry, but my curiosity got the better of me. I dared not touch the spiral-bound book. I peered over enough of it to see some words scribbled on the page. They were lyrics, probably for a new song Joey was working on.

  Time doesn’t change things

  They say with time we heal

  I can’t say I agree with them

  Because of how strongly I still feel

  Whether it only lasted a minute

  A split second of my time

  The enormity is all-consuming

  The dark shadow still follows close behind

  “I’m back.” His smile vanished when he caught sight of the open notebook resting on the bed.

  “I’m sorry. I didn’t touch anything. The book was open. The words are beautiful.” And dark. Mr. Joey Fine had a dark past. I wouldn’t inquire. Hell, we had only met a few hours ago. But one thing I knew for sure, the man standing in front of me carried baggage full of emotions similar to me.

  “Thanks.”

  He picked up the notebook and closed it. He grabbed a stack of others from a small shelf and shoved them into one of his duffel bags. He didn’t elaborate on their content, nor did I ask.

  “Are you ready to head out?” His eagerness from a moment ago had vanished.

  Shit. A pang of guilt shot through me for overstepping a huge boundary.

  “Yeah. Are you sure you still want to take me home?”

  “Of course I do. I apologize. I’ve got a lot on my mind. Sometimes the reality of getting off the bus and going home after spending months on it takes a litt
le time to settle in.”

  “Joey, I won’t be insulted if you want to stay and hang out with your friends or go home to your own place to unwind.”

  “I’ve been touring with my friends for the past nine months. My place will still be there when I get there.”

  He stepped closer to me, and our gazes met, locking on one another. “I want to be with you tonight. That’s all I want to do right now.”

  I took a deep breath. Talk about an intense moment.

  He leaned in and gently kissed my lips, causing me to feel weak in the knees. Add in lightheaded too. Hopefully I wouldn’t pass out from a mere peck on the lips, because spots floated in front of my eyes.

  “What happened…to keeping…your hands…off me?”

  “My hands are right here. They did as they were told.” He held them up as proof.

  “Now…who’s…being the…smartass?”

  What the hell? I could barely string words together coherently.

  “I have to say, I enjoyed that.”

  Me too. Too much for my own good.

  He didn’t respond to my sassy comment. Instead, he stared at me, his eyes burning right through me, heating me up, especially in the parts that counted.

  “So did I.” I let out the breath I’d been holding.

  “We should go.” He slung his bags over his shoulders.

  I suddenly had the self-conscious thing going on. I knew we had only shared a friendly kiss, but he hauled his ass off the bus in a mad rush to get somewhere.

  My apartment. That was where.

  Shit!

  8

  Joey

  Air. I needed air and to get off the bus. For someone who wasn’t claustrophobic, I suddenly felt caged in, probably because of my body’s reaction to the kiss. It was the type of kiss I’d give my sister on the cheek. But this one had landed on Teva’s soft, luscious lips. Christ. Just thinking about it in those terms revved my engine higher.

  I didn’t know whether more would happen between us, but if it did, I most definitely wouldn’t allow it to take place on a tour bus where numerous women had been fucked. Teva had made it perfectly clear about where she stood on the subject, and that placed her in a totally different category altogether. One I already saw her in.