by Faith Starr
“I’m sure you do.” Her tone matched his look.
Teva’s hand tensed over mine.
“We continuously write new music and bring it to the studio, so the good stuff gets laid down on tracks that we can then build upon.” Someone had to get the conversation out of the gutter. I decided it would be me.
“What kind of charity event are you playing?” Teva took a small bite of her Caesar salad.
Dani stepped up to the plate. “This time it’s to help raise money for victims of domestic abuse.”
“That’s commendable. Do you guys play a lot of charity events?”
“We like to give back as much as possible. It’s a lot easier when we’re in town recording because when we’re out on tour it’s oftentimes show after show with short breaks in between.”
Teva nodded in acknowledgment at Dani’s reply and took another bite of her salad.
“How do you choose which charities you want to be involved with?”
Lily finally had something worthwhile to contribute to the conversation. It’s too bad I didn’t fancy her question.
Dani’s eyed darted to mine. She shifted uncomfortably in the booth.
Logan must’ve sensed the silence and the tension-filled energy taking place between me and Dani because he took the floor. “We try to focus on charities that don’t receive enough attention. We also do hospital visits and other stuff like that as well.”
Good boy. Well said without saying much.
“That sounds so rewarding.” Teva gave ample attention to everyone sitting at the table with her comment.
“I consider my job to be rewarding as well.”
Lily must not have been used to being ignored and needed the focus on her.
“What is it you do?”
As usual my sister took the bait and fed into Lily’s attempt to garner the spotlight.
“I work in a neonatal ICU.”
Hmm, Lily’s answer surprised me, impressed me actually. That had to be a challenging job.
Dani’s emotions got the best of her, as usual. “You work with sick babies?”
What a mush. I rolled my eyes.
“I work with preterm and high-risk newborns, not necessarily sick.”
“Wow. That must be so hard.” Dani had admiration written all over her.
“Quite the opposite. It’s gratifying to be part of the process of getting the little tykes stable enough to thrive on their own without our assistance.”
Dani took a sip of water. “I don’t think I’d have the heart to see tiny babies in life-or-death situations.”
“You get used to it. It’s what I’ve been trained to do.”
It had become a conversation between the two of them while the rest of us chowed down on the meals the waitress had brought to the table.
“What kind of nurse are you?” My sister directed the question at Teva.
I was glad I had asked Dani to come along. She filled any and all quiet lapses at the table.
“I too work in a hospital.”
Unlike Lily, Teva didn’t provide any details, her response generic. Hmm, how interesting that she never wanted to discuss her job yet was pursuing a graduate degree in her chosen field. One would think she’d want to elaborate on a topic she felt so passionate about.
Everyone stared at her, waiting for her to continue. When she didn’t, Dani probed. “And what’s your specialty in the hospital?”
“I work in the psychiatric emergency room.” She patted her lips with her napkin before placing it back on her lap, all prim and proper.
Her reply especially caught Logan and Trevor’s attention. They finally focused on something other than the food on their plates. Dani focused on the table. I figured the whole psychiatry thing put her on edge. I understood her discomfort. She still saw a psychiatrist and therapist regularly to help her deal with her overwhelming anxiety and panic attacks. And let me not leave out the nightmares she occasionally had which made her scream in the middle of the night and scared the living shit out of me.
“You must see some interesting shit.” Logan took a huge bite of his burger.
“She does.” Lily spoke on Teva’s behalf. “In fact, she got attacked today which is why she has a bandage on her arm.”
The look Teva flashed Lily must’ve been a doozy, because Lily retreated, quieted down, and cast her attention on her food.
“No shit? A psycho patient attacked you?”
Teva now had Logan’s undivided attention.
“Sometimes things can get out of hand. Luckily, it was nothing major, requiring only a few stitches.”
He winced when he caught sight of her covered wound. “I can promise you one thing; you’d never catch me in one of those places. I don’t understand how people see and hear shit that isn’t there. It freaks me out.” He shivered.
“The brain works in mysterious ways. I get to see many variants of that truth.”
“Kudos to both of you.” Logan held his beer up in salud.
Lily and Teva both nodded.
Our dinner continued with friendly chitchat and teasing.
As I had forewarned, Lily hooking up with Trevor wasn’t going to happen. But Logan and the waitress were another story altogether. The woman came outside with us before we left to take a quick picture because, as we’d mentioned earlier, none of us wanted a scene inside the restaurant. The rest of us then took off, leaving Logan behind. I didn’t need to fill in any more details. They were pretty self-explanatory.
When Lily, Teva, and I arrived back at their apartment, we went in separate directions. Lily went to her room. Teva and I went to hers.
19
Teva
Joey and I were lying face-to-face on my bed.
“Do you feel better?” He had come across as so down and out when he’d first arrived at my apartment. I wanted to make sure his mood had uplifted.
“I feel great.” He stroked my cheek, tenderness in his touch, his gaze locked on mine. “How about you?”
“Other than tired, I feel fine.”
“Earlier, Lily upset you by discussing your job. Are you not happy with it?”
“I love my job, otherwise, I wouldn’t be pursuing a graduate degree to get to the next level.”
Liar!
I nonchalantly exhaled my guilt.
He took hold of my hand and caressed it, being mindful not to go near the bandage. “Have you really gotten hurt three times in the last four months?”
Why the hell did he have to show such concern? He barely knew me.
“It’s all part of the job. Working in the field I do, crazy things can happen. I knew that going in and fully accept that reality.” I hated to sound so curt, but I had no desire to speak to him or anyone else about my profession.
“I didn’t mean to upset you.”
His voice remained even-keeled whereas mine elevated. “When you decide to share with me why you came here to chill out, maybe I’ll share my feelings with you.”
He removed his hand from mine, his eyes opening wide. “What the hell’s going on, Teva?”
My chest rose and fell rapidly. I sat up on my bed, closed my eyes, and focused on my breathing to slow it down. I opened them and replied, “I’m sorry I jumped at you. It’s been a long day.”
“I get it, but I’ve also been known to be a good listener.”
“Perhaps one day I’ll have the opportunity to experience that with you.” I knew I sounded bitchy, but Lily had done an effective job of pushing my buttons earlier, especially by flirting with Joey in the car. She’d acted inappropriately. An impending conversation would ensue, since the one I’d had with her in the bathroom at the restaurant had been too brief to lessen my anger.
“You’ve made your point loud and clear.” His breathing picked up. “I forgot if you mentioned if you have to work tomorrow?”
“No. I have the day off.”
“Logan texted me during the drive back to your place. Both he and Trevor want to go to the
studio tomorrow. Would you like to come and watch us play?”
“I thought no one was allowed to hear new music until it was released.”
“I trust you won’t secretly record it and release it to the public.”
He was obviously joking, and the big grin he wore warmed my heart and melted away the tension pooling in my muscles.
What was it about this guy that softened me whenever I put my walls up? It wasn’t fair for me to take out my frustrations on him. I felt horrible for doing so.
“I’d love to. It’s something I’ve never done before. Are you sure it will be okay with your bandmates?”
“I can handle them.”
Next thing I knew he had me flat on my back with his body on top of mine. He rested on his forearms and brushed a few stray hairs out of my face. “Your roommate’s quite a handful.”
“You don’t say?”
“Why do you put up with that behavior?”
I had no clue why he wanted to discuss Lily, especially when his area of longing was so close to mine.
“Because despite her moronic tendencies and big mouth, she’s a good friend. Sometimes she just gets a bit ADHD on me, and I have to bring her down.” He nodded in silent understanding. “Why the sudden urge to discuss Lily?” Hopefully he couldn’t see how insecure I was starting to feel.
He leaned forward and kissed me. “Trust me when I say I have no interest in your roommate.”
“Even though she thinks you’re hot, like your car?” I had to tease him. I couldn’t resist.
“I’ve heard worse.”
Now he had piqued my interest. “What’s the craziest thing a fan has ever said or requested from you?”
“I don’t think you want to hear about that. I can tell you we have some overly rambunctious fans.” He started playing with my hair.
“I’m curious. Does the stereotype match the real thing?” It was a concern I had that tormented me. Did Joey Fine only want to pass the time with me until he left for tour again? Would he then move on and pretend nothing special had taken place between us?
Move on.
The thought had me sighing in disappointment. As much as a relationship wasn’t on my radar, Joey had me falling hard and fast, too hard and fast for my own good.
“You can’t make generalizations, babe.” He nibbled on my ear. My body temperature rose, the area between my thighs reaching scorching levels.
“Are you…trying to…distract me?” He had moved down to my neck and chest, planting delicate kisses on both.
“What makes you say that?” He tugged on my nipple through my shirt with his teeth, cupping my breast, his confidence with his sexuality the ultimate aphrodisiac.
“Just a hunch.” A faint moan slipped out with my words.
He shoved my top up toward my neck and trailed a line south using his tongue until he arrived at the waistband of my jeans. He unbuttoned and unzipped them. I raised my hips to assist in helping him drag the things down my legs, along with my underwear.
“You’re correct in your assumption. And for your information, this is the real thing.” He kissed his way up my legs.
Huh?
Shit. No time to think about it now, too many other thoughts flashing through my mind, like where those magical lips of his would go next.
His mouth made contact between my open thighs, his tongue licking me, moving from side to side and up and down in a pattern my body wanted to memorize. My eyes drifted closed on their own.
As hazy as my thoughts became, the words he had spoken flashed through my mind again. What did he mean by, “This is the real thing?”
He probably referred to our actions right now as being real, whereas I wished he referred to the budding relationship building between the two of us.
No relationships! No more pain!
Right. I had to agree with the screaming voices in my head. Regardless, I’d have to give them attention later because Joey’s decadent teasing and tormenting of my clit had me barely capable of stringing two words together, let alone any rational thought.
I pressed my head into the cushy foam of my pillow and fisted the sheets on both sides of me. My hips tried to move on their own, but he wanted none of that. He locked them in place, continuing to take care of business. And boy did he, with the excellence only a skilled man has.
He feasted on me, sliding a thick finger deep inside. I couldn’t breathe. I rolled my head from side-to-side like Linda Blair’s character did in The Exorcist. But in this case, I’d become possessed by something far more dangerous, something that could bring devastation to my heart.
The struggle between putting up my walls and sending Joey on his merry way—something I often did when someone got too close—or allowing this thing between us to play out and see where it led, wreaked havoc in my mind. Lily had probably been the closest I had ever let anyone get to me.
Christ. Screw the walls. The pleasure building inside me had reached volcanic proportions, about to erupt, the magma rising to the point of explosion at all surfaces and deep levels of my body.
My orgasm ripped through me. All the while he continued to drive his finger into me, making it difficult for the tremors to slow down and subside.
When they finally did, he removed his finger and kissed me above the hairline on my pubic bone.
He crawled back up my body, creating pressure on both sides of me, until we were again face-to-face.
“I’m still waiting for an answer to my question,” I stated breathlessly, my eyes half-closed.
He giggled against my cheek and adorned my neck and ear with kisses. He pressed his hardness into me, his darn jeans in the way. My hips instinctively joined in the fun, wanting to play along. So much for getting a verbal reply.
He moved about, unfastening then kicking off his jeans and boxers. He snatched a condom packet off my nightstand. Sneaky guy must have put it there when I wasn’t looking, because I hadn’t noticed it.
Straddling me, he tore it open with his teeth, the man savage, ferocious in his conquest.
I helped by pulling the condom out. I had never put one on a guy before. How difficult could it be?
Trickier than I’d thought. I reached down between our bodies. The stupid piece of latex wouldn’t slide on. Maybe he required a larger size.
“You’re rolling it on the wrong way, babe.”
How humiliating. I hoped he couldn’t see the redness in my cheeks.
He placed his hand on top of mine to help me out, with no criticism or judgment about my inexperience. What a sweetheart.
“That’s better,” he said after getting the condom situated.
My eyes flicked to his to see if they mirrored my hunger. They did.
He leaned forward and kissed me. I tasted myself. It only heightened my desire for him. It could have been a result of the intimate act we currently shared or because he made me feel free and beautiful, exactly how a woman should feel. Something I had never felt before. Sure, there had been dates here and there, but for the most part, I rode solo, a rather productive method to protect my heart and emotional well-being.
What a crock of shit and totally untrue.
My fingers dug into his hair. My pelvic muscles throbbed, especially when he aligned himself with my opening. I think my body wanted him as much as my mind and heart did.
My lips parted, I tried to catch my breath, the fullness and feel of him taking up so much space inside me—and I wasn’t only referring to the physical component. This man consumed every square inch of me.
He seized my leg and bent my knee into my chest, which allowed a deeper level of penetration.
Holy shit. Each time we had sex, he upped the bar.
My eyelids drifted shut, too heavy to keep open.
He pumped in and out of me, his fingers burying themselves in my ass cheeks.
My hands kept busy as well. I gripped his ass for dear life, encouraging forward movement in case he got a sudden urge to halt our activities. Not that any sane
guy would. Regardless, this race would continue to the finish line.
“Fuck, you feel so good,” he hummed.
He took my nipple between his teeth, biting down with a bit of force. That was the final straw. I came. I didn’t see because my eyes had stars in front of them. He had more than conquered. He had me done for, lost on a desert island far, far away with Tom Hanks, my moans and screams only to be heard by a coconut named Wilson.
“That’s it, baby.” His body tensed, hardening.
We didn’t stop until both of us were spent, too exhausted to move.
He rolled off me, flat on his back. “Shit. That was remarkable, amazing, Teva.” He panted.
Ah, this guy fed my ego well.
“I agree. You’re amazing too.” I rolled my head to the side, since it felt too heavy to lift. I laid my hand on his strong chest and caressed it. Why not boost his ego too? Not that he needed it.
“I’ll be right back. Let me go clean up.”
He climbed off the bed and went to the bathroom in the hall. I hoped Lily was in her room, being he was naked.
His disappearance left me feeling empty. I rewound the last few comments spoken.
Crap!
The words quickly came to me. He had said the sex was amazing. I had said he was amazing. Dammit. I couldn’t say this type of heavy shit so soon. Thinking about what I’d said hurt my own ears.
I climbed out of bed and retrieved my robe. I too wanted to wash up.
He exited the bathroom right when I entered. He kissed the top of my head in passing.
When I finished, I discovered him sitting on my bed, fully clothed. What the hell?
“Are you leaving?” Could I sound any more pathetic, tightening the tie on my robe and stepping deeper into the room?
“It’s getting late. I’m going to head out. I’ll give you a call in the morning to let you know what time we’re going to be at the studio.”
“Yeah, okay. Sure.” I put on the best smile I could muster, but my insides raged. I couldn’t question him. We weren’t committed to each other.
Who was I kidding? Joey Fine did not do relationships and neither did I, which had me wondering why I kept fantasizing about being in one with him. Those thoughts needed to stop like yesterday.