“I made sure to ask for a small loveseat, not a sofa,” Casey brags while giving me a wink and a smile.
I’m thankful she hasn’t pointed out my deer-in-the- headlights look. The further I walk into the room, the more anxious I become. The last couple of nights I have been having these strange nightmares, at least I hope they are only dreams and not recollections lost in the recesses of my mind. I guess I’m nervous to find out if they are.
Awkwardly sitting down, I place my hands in my lap and start twisting my fingers together. The small movement gives my mind the distraction needed to keep from going insane. Casey looks down at my hands then back to my face before taking out a tape recorder.
“Ashley, do I have your permission to record this. I find that people with memory loss sometimes recover better when hearing their own voice play back to them if there ever was a time you had a relapse.”
“Yes,” I say, my voice coming out louder than necessary. We have already talked in length about the possibility of me regaining my memories, just to lose them again. It’s not common, but still possible.
“Great. Now, let’s begin. Is there anything you feel might be worth mentioning to me? I always like to give my friends the opportunity to talk before I start asking questions.”
Casey is sitting in an office chair about four feet away from me holding a notepad and pen in her hand. Her short hair is placed high on her head with a pencil securing the bun, she’s also wearing glasses that I’ve never seen her use before. The red pantsuit she is wearing helps complete the therapist look she’s mastered.
“I’ve been having weird dreams,” I declare, waiting for the look of shock I’ve been expecting to appear on her face. Casey has come to the clubhouse six times now, and not once have I mentioned any of my nightmares. When she doesn’t show any surprise from my admission, I decide to continue. “They’re not very long, mainly because I wake up panting and sweating just moments after they begin.”
“Is it a reoccurring dream?”
She only asks the question after I’ve nodded in her direction. I’m finding it hard to willingly talk about this, so maybe it’s best if she just asks for the information she needs to fix me.
“No,” I answer honestly. “Sometimes they are different.”
“Describe the first one that comes to your mind.”
I don’t have to think long before I have the horrifying dream playing out in my head. It’s the one that scared me the most, mainly because I felt like it was happening to me. In all the other dreams, I’ve just felt like an outsider looking in. This one was different.
“I’m walking into a café in Dallas, it’s one I visit often because I enjoy talking to the owner. Her name is Louanne. She’s in her mid-sixties and has the best stories, whether they are true or not is still up for debate. Only, when I walk in this time she’s not alone. Louanne is talking to a girl, so I take a seat at the counter. It’s not until a large dark figure enters that the dream turns odd. It looks like one of those black shadowy figures from Harry Potter. He attacks the girl. Right there in front of everyone. He drags her out of the café as she screams for help.”
Casey patiently listens to my story. Jotting down a sentence or two, and only asking a question when she’s sure I’m finished describing my nightmare.
“What did this girl look like? The one being attacked?” Casey clarifies, even though I knew who she was referring to.
“That’s the thing, no one in the dream has a face. Not one I can remember anyway.”
“Not even Louanne?”
“No, but I’m certain that she’s the one talking to the girl.”
“Is there anything the girl is wearing, or maybe an identifying mark on her body that may give her identity away?”
I close my eyes to help me picture the images seared into my memory from the dream. I can see the red and white checkered counter tops that match the red booths placed strategically around the room to make it easy for the servers to do their jobs. There are a few customers in different stages of finishing their meal. I walk to the counter and sit five stools down from Louanne who is talking to the strange girl.
“I can’t see anything that will help.” I say with my eyes still shut. “There’s nothing.”
“That’s alright, let’s try something else.”
Casey’s voice has me opening my eyes, and I’m thankful to see a small reassuring smile pull at her lips. I’m disappointed that I can’t give her an answer to such a simple question, but I can’t force myself to see something that isn’t there.
“Why don’t you tell me what…”
The door to the room is ripped open causing both of us to turn our attention to the intruder. Tony, who also goes by Irish I recently learned, is standing in the doorway with a look of concern on his face. I see his eyes roam over my body before he visibly relaxes.
“Follow me,” he says while looking at Casey. Walking toward me he doesn’t give me, the verbal option of trailing him. Taking my hand in his larger one, Tony begins to drag me out of the room. I turn my head to make sure Casey is following us, and try to slow Irish down when I see her normal smile turned downward. No one as sweet as her deserves to have that look of uncertainty in her eyes and that frown on her face.
Rushing through the main room, I am almost tempted to slow Tony down in fear I might fall and trip over my own feet, but when I see the strangers being led by the men I now know as Tarnished Souls members, I start to pick up my pace.
The two Latino men that are surrounded by the three bikers look dressed to impress. The larger of the two is wearing a charcoal grey suit, a blood red tie, and shiny black shoes that scream expensive. The shorter one, who is currently staring at me like I hold all the secrets to the hidden city of Atlantis, is decked out in a solid black suit, white button-up shirt, and black silk tie. His brown eyes give away his youth, but the boldness of his strut makes him seem nothing but confident.
“Hola, Ashley,” Mr. Black tie says as Tony tries to dash by them.
“What the fuck did you say?” Tony growls, after coming to a dead stop. I bump into his back which doesn’t seem to bother him at all. In fact, it makes it easier for Tony to grab my arms and spin me behind him. Now there is a wall of Irish fury between me and the stranger that somehow knows my name.
“Irish,” Buck says in a warning tone, “now is not the time or place.”
I’ve come to know the names of about half the officers and a handful of the members in the club. Buck is the president, Taz, the brooding giant, is the vice president, and Torch is the sergeant at arms. Irish, who isn’t necessary a sworn in officer, is still high enough on the latter to be treated as such.
“Fuck that,” I hear Tony roar before lunging forward. He’s fast enough to grab ahold of the stranger’s collar, but not quick enough to land a punch. One of the men I don’t know yet, with huge holes in his ears, grabs ahold of Tony’s wrist.
“This isn’t going to help anyone. Stop what you’re doing and think about the repercussions that could follow,” he says, trying to talk Tony down before he makes a mistake.
“You think you’re brave for comin’ here unannounced,” Tony spits at the man he has by the collar. “If I see you even lookin’ at what’s mine again I will rip your eyes from your fuckin’ skull and shove them up your bodyguard’s ass.”
“You’ve been warned,” Buck says, letting the unwanted visitors know that he would have Tony’s back if the terms he laid out were violated.
I don’t have enough time to process everything that happened before Casey and I are brought to a room full of women. Most of them I recognize, but some I do not. I’m instantly relieved when I see my sister, Allison, amongst the group. Tony shuts the door without giving me any explanation as to what is going on. I know it’s because he is still angry at the events that just unfolded, so I decide it’s best if I just allow him to go do what needs to be done.
“That was intense,” Casey breathes, just as Allison walks over to u
s. “Did Tony tell you what was going on?”
“No,” I answer, hoping that Allison will know more than we do.
“Don’t look so worried, sis,” my sister’s greeting is more upbeat than I anticipated. “The men have thrown us in here because Dominic showed up unannounced. They have this room surrounded with members that are here to protect us.
“Who is Dominic, and why did he know me by name?”
Allison’s eyebrows arch in surprise when she hears that the stranger she referred to as Dominic knew my name. I can tell she is going to shrug off my question when she forces her face to go back to looking just like mine. I guess I’m going to have to find out another way. Tony is going to have to answer some of my questions or take a gamble on me going completely insane.
Irish
Did Dominic, Carlos’ son, and his gooney really think we were going to allow him to waltz into our compound like he’s Al Capone walking into one of his underground Chicago clubs? After making sure Ashley and Casey were safely tucked away in the room with the rest of the women, I storm back to Buck’s office where they are holding Dominic.
Taking my place by Hammer, I stand amongst my brothers just as Dominic is starting to give his reasons behind this misplaced act of insanity. Crossing my arms over my chest, I begin to settle myself in for the lie of the century.
“You killed my father,” he states, zeroing in on Torch. The club’s sergeant at arms straightens his spine before giving Dominic a smirk that relays his message loud and clear. Torch has no regrets about killing a sex trafficker, and would willingly do it again.
“I wasn’t able to give him a proper burial. My family couldn’t mourn his loss like we deserved.”
“What about the women you abduct, rape, torture, and then sell? What about their families?” Taz moves to get into Dominic’s personal space, but the giant bodyguard he brought with him stops our vice president before he can. With the two of them standing chest to chest you can see that for the first time in a long time, Taz is not the largest threat in the room.
“You must have a death wish, little man,” Taz growls.
“I think everyone needs to calm down,” Dominic chuckles after hearing Taz’s new nickname for his guard. “This isn’t why we came here. I’m extending an offer of peace amongst our groups. I never agreed with the business my father was running and I have every intention of steering my organization into a different direction.”
“Bullshit,” Torch voices above the rest of our words of criticism.
“We’ve listened to your lies long enough. You’re either extremely brave or entirely stupid to show up at my clubhouse unannounced. There’s only one way you are getting out of here alive, and that’s by telling me the truth.” When Buck’s through giving the young boss a speech on his new reality, I inwardly smile at the brief look of fear that flashes in his brown eyes. The young man clears his throat while straightening his tie, obviously trying to decide whether he’s going to lie or not.
“Slasher tortured and raped my sister. Since Maria has always meant more to me than my father, I am willing to pause my war with your club so we can work together to take out Slasher. He needs to be dealt with, as do any of the Blacktop Sinners that are loyal to him.”
“Why should we believe you?” I ask, knowing it’s not farfetched to think about Slasher abusing a woman. We’ve all seen what he’s capable, and Dominic’s organization would be the easiest target. He’s green to the leadership of this life.
“You don’t have much of a choice. You need me as much as I need you. He’s proven to be smarter than any one of us gave him credit for. To take him out, it will require us to work together.”
“Taz, Torch, and Hammer get them the hell out of my clubhouse,” Buck orders. None of our members are surprised by his sudden dismissal. Dominic has just made a solid point, one that we would be unwise to ignore, but Buck doesn’t want him to know that. Instead, he crosses his hands over his chest before growling out a warning as the men lead them out of the office.
“Next time you show up uninvited I will shoot you, and anyone with you, where you stand.”
Dominic nods his head in understanding before getting ushered toward the opened door.
“Not so fast,” I declare, forcing myself between the line of men and their exit. Looking directly at the fool that purposely went out of his way to say hello to my woman, I ask him the only question I expect an answer to.
“How do you know me Ashley?”
I can see his eyes light up with a smile that is too scared to appear on his face. With a quick straightening of his tie, something I’ve noticed he does when he’s nervous, Dominic looks back into my eyes to answer the question.
“Everyone knows what Slasher did to your woman. He enjoys bragging about his conquests. Especially if it’s the woman of a man he considers an enemy.”
With that said, I step out of the way as Torch and Taz begin to corral the two intruders out of the room. Once it’s just me and Buck standing in the room, I look to my president and give him my opinion on the situation, whether he wants it or not.
“As much as it kills me to say it, he’s right. We could use the help, and he has the soldiers to provide it. Plus, there is a reason they say keep your enemies close.”
“We are going to have to take it to a vote,” Buck states. “But I agree. Even if I don’t entirely believe he’s telling the whole truth.”
“We could have Hammer chip him. Keep track of who he’s meetin’, and where he’s goin’.”
“That’s not a bad idea, but who would place the chip?”
“You,” I announce. “He would never think you were doing the dirty work because in his organization the boss gives the orders. He doesn’t carry them out.”
“Not a bad plan. As soon as the men come back we will discuss it further.”
The rest of the wait for the men to return is done in silence. Now that the threat has been removed from the office, I take a seat at the table. Buck is no doubt trying to figure out a way for him to get a GPS tracking device on Dominic. If it were up to me, I would simply knock the cocky fucker upside the head and shove it down his throat while he’s unconscious, but thankfully there will be a level-headed member that will come up with the details.
“That was a total shit show,” Taz growls once he enters the office. Torch is right on his heels as Hammer brings up the rear.
“Did he give you any trouble?”
“No, even if we did try taunting him into doing something.”
The grunts of laughter around the room at Hammer’s confession eases some of the tension that was surrounding us. It doesn’t surprise me they would try to press Dominic’s buttons. It’s not like they actually needed a reason, him being here was enough, but all of us men try to control our need for blood and power out of respect for Buck and our club. They are one and the same, and representing them both with a controlled authority is what makes the Tarnished Souls MC unlike any other club out there.
“Irish has a plan,” Buck announces. When he glances at me, I know it’s his invitation for me to take over. I don’t mind being the one to fill the men in on my idea, but I wouldn’t say I have a plan. That will be on all of us to figure out.
“We need to chip Dominic. Having a GPS tracker on him would guarantee we always know where he’s at. We could start to learn his patterns. When he’s meeting someone, where he’s meeting them, and if we survey him further we would know who he’s meeting.”
“There’s no way they won’t find it. He has teams of men that search for trackers, chips, and wires,” Taz argues.
“If we could put it on something that he always keeps on him then your idea might work,” Hammer the voice of reason speaks. If anyone of us would know about these things it would be Mr. Tech himself. “But, and this is a big but, we would need to find a way to sneak in unnoticed.”
“Why?” I ask, “when we have Buck. He’s showed up to our place unannounced, I think it’s only fair for us to d
o the same. Torch goes with Buck, causes a scene which will allow Buck to place the device.”
“I should go,” Taz states.
“We can’t send our president and vice president into enemy territory.”
Hammer states what was on my mind, but the look on Taz’s face lets everyone know convincing him to stay behind isn’t going to happen.
“If you send Torch with Buck there is a better chance of them not believing the act you are trying to sell. If I go, they won’t think we are stupid enough to stage a scene that could likely take out our two highest ranking members. I already had words with the burly bastard, so me hitting him won’t seem that farfetched.
“He’s right,” I mumble. “I hate to say it, but he is.”
The remainder of the men shake their heads in acknowledgement. They know as well as I do that Taz has made his point and will now be going into the lion’s den with Buck. I just hope, for our club’s sake, these two bikers are better actors than half of Hollywood these days.
Ashley
I tried and tried then I tried some more to get just one of my questions answered, but Tony was a nut that just wouldn’t crack. No amount of begging, fake tears, or bribing was going to persuade him to give in. So, I just gave up. I’m starting to think he doesn’t want to tell me anything because he secretly doesn’t want me to get my memories back, but that’s crazy, right? That would mean he is hiding something from me, and despite his latest behavior, I know Tony would never keep secrets. He knows how I feel about trust, especially in a romantic relationship. I could never be with someone I have no faith in.
Standing on the edge of the water with him beside me, I contemplate whether getting in the water is a wise decision. All my wounds are basically healed, but the dirty lake may cause some of the ones that aren’t completely gone to get infected. Enjoying some fresh air and sunshine was something all of us women thought would be a good idea. I’ve gotten to know more of the ladies in the clubhouse and I find that they are exactly what I needed to cure some of my homesickness. I still haven’t been able to have a detailed conversation with my parents. Tony is adamant I only give them limited information. They pry, but I always rush to get off the phone when I feel like I’m about to give in to them. It upsets me that I must lie to my family by pretending everything is hunky-dory, but I have no reason not to believe Tony when he says it’s for the best. I tell myself it will be better in the long run because my memories may be too much for me, and my parents, to handle. If I’m here with Tony, I know he will get me through this dark time in my life.
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