Irish

by Dusty Lassetter

  “Your wife is in good hands.”

  I don’t bother correcting the woman as she walks away, pushing Ashley into a room before shutting the door. I’m left standing in the middle of a crowded emergency room with blood covering ninety percent of my body. Walking to the men’s room, I begin the process of washing off what I can. It isn’t until I look at the mirror that I allow all the anger and fear I am feeling to spill over. Rearing my fist back, I make easy work of destroying the reflection looking back at me through the mirror. It’s his fault she is here. It’s his fault she might die.

  Not long after I’ve finished cleaning up the broken pieces of myself and the mirror off the floor of the bathroom, Hammer charges through the double doors with a nurse on his heels. The look on his face should tell the woman everything she needs to know. Hammer doesn’t give a shit about their protocol.

  “Sir…Sir…Excuse me, but you can’t just barge in here.”

  “Listen sweetie, I know you are overworked and underpaid so why not take this hundred-dollar bill,” he states while reaching into his wallet to pull out a Benjamin. “And forget you ever saw me.”

  “Make it two and you have a deal,” she states, squaring her shoulders to let Hammer know she isn’t willing to go down on the price.

  “You’re a sneaky little nurse,” he declares with humor lining his voice. When he takes out another hundred I can do nothing but shake my head at the fool for buying off someone that would have been overruled when the doctors found out who we were. Everyone in this towns know us, and respects us. Hell, most the doctors in here have worked on a member or two. They wouldn’t want to piss off their most loyal customers.

  “You alright, my man?” Hammer questions once the greedy nurse walks away with her pockets heavier than they were before. I look from him to the door I last saw Ashley enter before patting myself down in hopes of finding a toothpick. I wasn’t going to answer his ignorant question until I see he is looking down at my busted-up knuckles.

  “You should see the other guy,” I meekly joke.

  “Here,” he mumbles, handing me a newly pointed stick. I take the offered toothpick, not at all interested in asking where he pulled it out of. Hammer’s club name should have been Houdini. He’s always making shit appear and disappear. Normally, I find it fascinating, but there’s too many other emotions weighing down my chest tonight.

  “She’s going to survive this, Irish.”

  Hammer phrases his sentence carefully. He doesn’t say the normal, “she’s going to be fine,” bullshit. He knows if she does live, the time for her to be fine isn’t now, or anywhere in the near future. Going through what she did, remembering everything the way she did, will unquestionably fuck up her mind for a long time.

  “I’ve got to fix her. I just don’t know how.”

  By saying this out loud, I feel like I am letting the universe know that Ashley isn’t going anywhere. Once it’s been said, it can’t be undone. Hammer is the closest thing I have to an actual brother. He’s drank a beer in my momma’s kitchen, so I trust him to help me with this. There has to be a way to help Ashley heal all the emotional wounds she’s suffering from.

  “You will, Anthony. I’ll help make sure you do.”

  The two of us spend the rest of our time waiting in silence. When we finally see the doctor walk out of the room, both of us take off in his direction.

  “Your wife is going to be fine.” Hammer gives me a sideways look when I don’t correct the doctor, but I ignore it. I like that these people think she is my wife. “I’ve given her a sedative that will keep her asleep for now. The nurses are getting her ready to be transported to a room. She’s going to have to stay overnight until the psych doctor makes his rounds in the morning. Is there anyone you need us to call for you?”

  “No,” I quickly reply. “How long until I can see her?”

  “She’s being transported to room three-nineteen. If you go to the nurse’s station on the third floor they will allow you to wait for her there.”

  After shaking the doctor’s hand, Hammer and I walk down several hallways before we manage to find the elevators. Once inside the tiny lift, I allow some relief to seep into my system. Ashley is alive. She will get a good night’s sleep, and in the morning hopefully she will allow me to beg for her forgiveness. At this point, there is nothing I wouldn’t do to get her back.

  Ashley

  “Have you remembered anything new today?”

  Casey asks the same question every day when we first sit down to talk. I’ve been locked up in this house of crazies for fifteen days. The food is inedible, privacy is nonexistent, and the nurses around here really need to learn some bedside manners. They treat me like I am planning on biting their faces off while screaming how I strive to take over the world. I’m not insane, but the louder you holler that in here the crazier you sound.

  Looking up from staring at my hands twisting together in my lap, the first thing I notice is the brightness of Casey’s blue pantsuit. Compared to the grey walls, white floors, and tan furniture I would say the color is absolutely stunning. I’ve noticed that studying her wardrobe has become a habit of mine. I’m always trying to take in all the color while I can. This place is void of anything that resembles life. Even the food looks depressed. Perhaps, if they let us wear something other than white cotton pants and shirts, more people would want to join the living once again.

  “We’ve discussed this, Casey. I remember everything. Nothing new is going to come back.”

  Maybe my tone is harsher than it needs to be. Maybe I should just plaster a smile on my face and act like everything in my life is peachy. I want out of here, and despite my parents coming all the way down from Dallas my psychiatrist will not release me. I wonder what I need to say, or do, for Casey to finally sign the forms. We’ve already went over why I cut myself. I wanted to take control over my life again. For two years, I allowed Irish’s decisions to affect me, and then I was abducted. Obviously, Slasher didn’t give me say in what happened to me. During this time, my inner strength abandoned me and now it’s time to get it back.

  “I’ve got something I need to discuss with you, Ashley.”

  I’ve never seen Casey squirm in her seat from being uncomfortable, and to tell the truth I don’t quite like it. She is supposed to be the confident therapist that’s helping me talk through my emotions. Looking at her now, she’s nothing more than a woman that looks desperate to get something off her chest.

  “As you know I’ve kept in touch with several members from the Tarnished Souls MC. I would like to remind you that Tony and I have not seen eye-to-eye on your care, but he came to me with some information I couldn’t ignore.”

  “I don’t want to hear it, Casey.”

  I raise my hand, allowing her to see and hear that I am not going to talk about Tony or anything Tarnished Souls. I can still hear Slasher’s voice describing all the wrong doings he felt Buck and his men did to him. He would love to remind me why exactly I was under his control as he used his homemade toys of torture on me. The vaguest of those memories has my stomach threatening to revolt, forcing me to breathe heavy so I don’t vomit all over the white tiled floor.

  “I know you don’t, but you need to. I’m willing to sign off on your release, but only if you stay at the compound with your sister. Allison has promised to stay in Brady for as long as you need her to. I can’t release you any other way. It’s not safe.”

  Neither one of us are expecting the laughter that starts bubbling out of my chest after hearing her give me an ultimatum. In this moment, I feel like I must be crazy. Tony is trying to be my puppet master. Pulling my therapist’s strings to get me to do what he wants. There is only one question to be asked at this point. Not caring how rude I sound, I blurt it out.

  “Did he fuck you too?”

  Casey rears back like I’ve just slapped her. I figured she would be surprised with my choice of language, but the hurt in her eyes is not something I was expecting. I get my answer wit
hout her having to say it, and start to feel like a giant idiot for allowing Tony to have this effect on me.

  “I’m sorry,” I mumble, “but you have to hear how ridiculous this sounds. Maybe we should swap seats because you’re not making any sense.”

  “Ashley, you’re not the first girl this man abducted. He is the president of a club involved in human trafficking. Tony came up to me just two days after you were brought here. It wasn’t until yesterday morning that I knew you were in real danger of him coming back for you.”

  Casey is referring to me telling her about the condition Slasher had for me going free. There is a man, somewhere, that is going to ask me for a favor. I am supposed to do whatever he wants. Apparently, something was stolen from Slasher and he’ll stop at nothing to get it back.

  “Then keep me here,” I declare.

  Casey is just as stunned by my words as I am. Would I really prefer to be stuck in this place of padded walls and shoes with no laces than go be with my sister at a clubhouse full of bikers? Yes, I believe I would.

  “I know I am sounding like a conspiracy theorist, but there are some things you still don’t know. I promised Tony I would let him tell you, but Ashley you need to think about this. Slasher is a desperate man, and unfortunately, he is a desperate man with the money and means to get what he wants. You are not safe here. I feel like it’s my responsibility to protect all my friends. You’ll either go voluntarily or I’ll have it court ordered that you be released into the custody of your brother-in-law.”

  “You wouldn’t. You couldn’t. There is no way the state would allow you to abuse what little power you have.”

  “I’m sorry, Ashley,” she states. The look on her face is one of sympathy and resolve. Casey has been corrupted by the Tarnished Souls MC, and there is nothing I can do about it. I could call my mother and father, but they have no strings to pull. It doesn’t surprise me that the state would willingly place me in the care of the man whose lifestyle choices were the cause of my abduction. They are tired of paying for my room and board. I’m nothing more to them than tax dollars that could be saved.

  “How long would it take for you to get the court order?”

  “Anywhere from two to three weeks.”

  “Well, I guess that’s two to three weeks I’ll have to plan something special for my brother-in-law.”

  “Ashley, please. I urge you to just comply. Anything could happen in three weeks.”

  If I weren’t a prisoner, I would storm out of the door. Casey was someone I considered a friend, regardless if she was paid to talk to me or not. It hurts that she would use her power over me to give the man that signs her checks what he wants. I thought she was here for my wellbeing, but once again I have been fooled.

  “We’re done talking,” I respond, knowing we still have twenty minutes of time left. Casey gives me a pleading look before gathering up her stuff. Once she’s got everything in her carrying case, she snaps it closed. Looking at me one last time, she stands to her full height.

  “I won’t be here next week, Ashley. You are going to have to see one of the therapists on staff. I’ll leave him some notes to help with the transition.”

  With that said, she walks out of the room, telling the male nurse closest to the door that I am ready to go back to my room. By trying to take back control of my life, I’ve allowed Tony full power instead. I just hope the anger I feel simmering beneath my skin leaves my system before I am released to that man. There is no telling what will happen if it doesn’t.

  Seventeen days, that is all it took for Casey to get the moronic judge to sign off on my release. Tony has complete power over me, and there is nothing I can do about it. She volunteered to drive me to the compound, probably because she wanted to plead her case to me one last time. If I had a dime for every time Casey said she was sorry, I would be rich enough to buy myself out of this mess. To say my parents were pissed is an understatement. The lawyer Tony hired made them seem unfit to make decisions on my behalf. The thug in a suit argued that I was abducted in Dallas from underneath their roof, and the man who kidnapped me was still a threat. If they couldn’t keep me safe then, how would they do so now? Tony also came out smelling like roses when they pointed out that it was my choice to stay with him and Allison after my abduction. That he also rushed me to the hospital after my memories came back, and I had a mental breakdown. Fifteen days later, full of sketchy proceedings, that obviously got rushed through the system, and I am now pulling up to the compound that will be my home until I can prove to the state I am not a hazard to myself or society.

  There is a group of people waiting to greet me when Casey finally parks. As I step out of the car, Rebecca is the first to charge at me. Taking me in her arms she gives me a tight hug I hadn’t realized I needed.

  “We’ve missed you,” she exclaims.

  I go from person to person, each one giving me a greeting. The men seem more inclined to just pat me on the back, but I appreciate the sentiment either way. When Allison finally makes her way to me, I step away before she can even try to wrap her skinny arms around me.

  “I deserve that,” she mummers.

  “You deserve worse,” I reply with a smile plastered on my face because I refuse to let her have any effect on my emotions. She is my sister, but that is just a title. There are some things that can’t be forgiven, even if the person doing them to you is your blood. I want nothing to do with my twin. Not now. Not ever.

  “Allison, go get started on lunch.”

  Hearing Tony talk to his wife is enough to send the smile I was trying so hard to keep falling off my face in an instant. I feel my lips pull down into a sneer, and can’t stop myself from taking a dig at the both of them.

  “You should hurry along and do what your husband asked,” I spit out, staring into a pair eyes that are identical to mine. I told myself I would not become a hateful person. That I wouldn’t allow the things that have happened to change me. I guess my will to not change isn’t as strong as the anger I feel towards these two.

  “Ashley.”

  Remarkably, by hearing the pleading tone bleeding through Tony’s words the smile returns to my face. I can sense the desperation he feels for me to start acting like the pushover I once was. The old Ashley would never talk to Allison with such disdain. I always allowed my twin to walk all over me because she was my sister. Those days are over. I refuse to be Tony’s, or Allison’s, doormat.

  “You may have paid your way into becoming my power of attorney, but that doesn’t give you the right to reprimand me. If I were you, I would focus more on your wife and not her sister. Allison should be your only concern.”

  Tony says nothing further as we continue to stare at each other. I’m desperately trying to portray all the hate I feel for him in my eyes. I need him to know that the damage has been done, and no amount of pleading or explaining will change anything.

  I’m fully aware of all the eyes staring at the two of us. I can’t blame them for being nosey. This is like a train wreck happening in slow motion. It’s hard to look away from something you know is going to end badly.

  “Maybe we should take this inside.” Buck’s suggestion eases some of the tension surrounding us, but I refuse to be the first one to look away.

  “Yeah. Okay,” Tony mumbles the words just as he turns around to follow the same path Allison took toward the clubhouse. Now that I am not in the middle of a staring contest, I feel utterly stupid for acting this way in-front of his friends. They are probably only putting up with me because of Tony, and here I am challenging him on their front lawn.

  “There’s nothing like watching a woman scorned putting a man in his place,” Taz laughs out. I start giggling along with him, thankful to at least have someone on my side, when Mia and some of the other girls look at the VP like he’s lost his mind.

  “I think your time for that is long overdue. Serenity would agree if she were here,” Mia says, giving Taz a look that dares him to argue.

  “Mia,”
Torch, her chosen biker, says in warning. It almost makes me laugh harder knowing she will completely ignore him. That is something I admire about the one they call spitfire. She is tough as nails, never backs down, and isn’t scared to call people out on their shit. Hate her or love her, either way you feel something strong toward Mia.

  “Fuck off,” Taz grumbles before trailing behind some of the other members that are already half way to the door.

  “We have a lot of catching up to do, but first, let’s eat,” Mia states.

  Allowing Mia to lead me into the clubhouse, I don’t bother turning around to see if Casey has followed or not. I’m still upset with her. Actually, I would prefer if she left. Avoiding three people is harder than two. I need to try to keep my distance from the ones that can set me off. I don’t need to do anything that will give Tony leverage to keep me his prisoner any longer than necessary. I will prove to everyone I am capable of taking care of myself, one way or another.

  Ashley

  I didn’t get one single second of sleep. I spent my first night back at the clubhouse tossing and turning. The room I’m staying in was Allison’s, but she gave it up to share with Sammy now that Scarlett is sleeping next to Teller’s. It’s crazy to think about this place having enough beds to house an entire street of homeless Americans, yet people are still having to share rooms.

  “Coffee?”

  Tony is looking at me from across the kitchen with the coffee pot in his hand, fully prepared to pour me a cup. I completely ignore him. No matter how childish it is, or how ridiculous ir makes me look, I act as if he isn’t even there. Looking across the table, I think about pouring myself a cup just to keep from falling asleep, but there is a sinking feeling currently taking over my stomach that won’t allow me to eat or drink anything.