“Hey, yourself” I reply and I can feel myself turn into some love struck little school girl right in front of him. The old, normal me would have cringed at how I’m acting when I’m around him, but at the same time, for some weird reason I can’t help what he does to me.
“You all set?”
“Erm… yeah, I guess so. Do I not need to change?” I run my hands up and down my body to indicate may attire, but I’m stopped midway when Jake reaches out, grabs my hands and pulls me in close to him.
“You look perfect just how you are.” He breathes quietly against my skin.
I have just a second to process what he has just said before I feel the welcome heat of his soft, warm lips brush against mine. My body reacts instantly to his advances and I can’t help needing him, craving more while savouring every delicious moment. Mentally I am memorising how his perfect, large, lean frame feels when it’s pressed tightly against mine and I never, ever want this feeling to end.
His hands leave mine and slowly and teasingly work their way up my body until they come to rest on either side of my neck. His strong hold on me feel somewhat dominant, yet also warm and protective too.
Reluctantly I pull my head back slightly so that I can catch a glimpse of him. My lips feel cold and empty without his touch, but the heat in his eyes instantly warms me from head to toe.
“We could always stay here?” He asks.
I’d love nothing more than to stay here with him, just the two of us with no distractions. Seriously, the way he makes me feel is indescribable. I’ve literally never known anything like it before. When I’m with him, it’s like nothing else matters. It’s as if nothing else exists except the two of us. But my horrible subconscious dutifully reminds me that we actually have plans.
“What about Amy?” I ask, forcing the words to leave my lips, and they come out more of a pant.
“Ah, I’m pretty sure she’d get over it.” He smirks back at me and I know that underneath his big, mischievous grin that he’s being deadly serious.
Who knows, maybe she would get over it. Maybe she wouldn’t even notice if we didn’t turn up, but I really hate letting people down. It’s one of my major weaknesses. Hannah always told me that my ‘people pleaser’ attitude was my main downfall.
“You can’t be serious Jake?” I ask when he doesn’t budge, my eyebrows raising slightly as I take him in. “It’s her last day, plus everything’s already booked and paid for so we can’t miss it. There could be people out there who really wanted those seats.”
He lets out an audible sigh of pure frustration and looks at me square in the eye. “Lucy, do you have any idea how hard it’s going to be for me? I’m struggling to hold back from you as it is and you want to torture me for a few more hours?” He pauses for a moment and his chest begins to rise and fall rapidly. “I just can’t stay away from you.”
“So don’t.” I reply, full of bravado, much to my own amazement. I’ve really got no idea where my sudden burst of confidence is coming from, but deciding not to ruin the moment by giving it too much thought, I reach up on my tip toes and place my lips softly against his.
“Come on Mister, It’s time to go.”
Jake keeps my hand firmly locked in his as we make our way down the strip and towards the beach. Usually I’d feel completely out of my comfort zone to be walking around so intimately with someone, but as strange as it sounds, it feels like we have been a part of each other’s lives for a hell of a long time. I know that thought alone should scare me, make me realised that I’m actually falling way too deep, too fast, but the connection that we have when we’re together is something else entirely. It’s explosive.
I feel like I could physically combust when I am with him and also when I’m away from him too.
I’m fully aware that I’m grinning like an absolute loon, but right now, here in the moment, I really don’t care. I don’t care about anything other than the feeling of Jake stood close beside me. I feel whole, more alive than I’ve ever felt before and I never, ever want this to end.
“Thank you.” Jake whispers, so softly that I almost don’t hear him.
I turn my head to look at him and he’s watching me closely. “What for?”
“For coming here with me today.”
“It’s fine. You don’t need to thank me.” I just about manage to mumble out, when really I want to say so much more, but the words wont form.
“You know, Luce?” He says after a short pause. “I’ve hated every second that I have spent without you. Jesus, actually saying that out loud makes me sound like some crazy, psycho serial killer.
A loud laugh escapes from deep within me. I try to stop it, but I can’t and I hope he doesn’t think that I’m laughing at him. It’s just a really bad habit that I have whenever I’m nervous.
“No, it doesn’t.” I say, once I have managed to calm myself a little. “I’m just happy that I’m not alone…”
“Hey, you two. Over here.”
I turn and see that we’re now at the beach and our conversation is drastically cut short by the sound of Amy’s high pitched squeal. I look over to where she is stood and watch as she jumps excitedly up and down on the spot, frantically waving her arms at us.
“Is she always this giddy?” I whisper to Jake, worried that she might hear me.
“Yeah. Sorry about that. Maybe I should have warned you.” Part of me feels bad for asking. She is his family after all and I’m just someone who he’s only just met. I really need to remember that.
Plus, I’m pretty sure somewhere, underneath all of that plastic bravado she’s really got a heart of gold. So Jake keeps telling me anyway. I guess I just need to give her a chance, but she makes me feel so nervous and uncomfortable when I’m around her and I don’t know why.
“Yes you do. It’s because she’s Jake’s family and she really knows him. You’re worried that she’ll judge you and make you feel like you’re not good enough.” My inner-self points out, making me feel a million times worse.
“In case you forgot, I also gave you the option of ditching this and staying exactly where I wanted to be.” Jake reminds me.
“Yes you did.” I feel myself blush some at the heated memory of both of us before we left my apartment before. “But just look how excited she is. Do you really want to be the one who takes that away from her?”
“If it means spending unlimited alone time with you, then yes.” Jake’s hand tightens around mine and I’m pretty sure that he’s just taken my heart right out of my chest.
I’m ruined…
I know right from this moment that there is no going back for me. Not now, not ever. I honestly don’t think I’d be able to even if I tried.
“Come on you two lovebirds. We’re about to board.” Amy shouts over to us while looking all goddess-like leaning over the boat.
“It’s not too late to change your mind. We could always make a run for it and head back to yours to up from where we left off earlier.”
As promising as that sounds and no matter how tempted I am, I just can’t bring myself to turn back around now. “We’re here now, but I’m sure we can do something later.”
His eyes glisten and linger on my lips as the words leave my mouth and I suddenly feel nervous again. My stomach begins to flutter like crazy and tight knots begin to form. I’m nervous and scared of the unknown, but I’m just as excited at the same time.
As soon as we have boarded the boat, Jake grabs my hand again and leads me towards the back where Amy is currently seated. When we come to a stop, I try to plonk my backside on the seat closest to me, but Jake seems to have other ideas by getting there first and suddenly his big, string arms clamp around my waist and he protectively pulls me down into his lap.
“Jesus, man.” Amy exclaims. “Let the bloody girl breathe.”
“Ah, shut up man.” He chuckles back at her, but as he says it, his grip tightens on me a little more. I’m not a hundred percent sure how I feel about it as I’ve never been in
this kind of situation before. I love the feel of Jake next to me, but having someone watching us is kind of weird.
“I’m only playing with you, chill out. There’s no need to look so worried, Lucy.” She adds to me.
“What, no… I’m fine.” I lie and I can feel Jake’s chest move up and down as he chuckles behind me. Talk about being put on the bloody spot. “Great, all eyes on me once again.” I think to myself.
“Do any of you guys want a drink before we leave?” Amy asks before standing up.
“Yes, please. Could I have a water?”
I’m not really thirsty, but feel like I need to be making conversation with her for some strange reason. I was always taught to be polite and use my manners, whatever the situation.
“Are you okay?”
“Yeah, of course. Why wouldn’t I be?” I ask confused and Jake’s frown deepens a little more. I instantly go all fuzzy over his concern.
“I saw you before when Amy told me to let you breathe. You clammed up and it’s like you didn’t even want to be here.”
“Oh, God no.” I rush out, trying my best to reassure him. “That’s not what it was at all. I’m more than happy here, it’s just…” ugh, I hate this. How do I try to tell him that I’ve never found myself in this kind of situation before? How do I explain that I’m so new to all of this? I’ve never experienced these kind of feelings before and deep down, with each day that passes, I’m absolutely petrified.
“It’s okay. You don’t have to tell me anything that you don’t want to. Forget I said anything.” He whispers softly against my shoulder and from the heat of his breath, every single hair on my body stands up from the contact. “Just promise that you’ll tell me if something doesn’t feel right?”
“I will. I promise.” I lean my head against his before continuing, “Everything feels so right with you, and I think that’s what’s scaring me.”
I’m so relaxed. I feel like I could sleep for an eternity. The boat trip with Amy seemed like a success and much to my complete surprise, she actually went out of her way to make me feel comfortable and welcome. To be honest, she was really nice and nothing at all like I first expected her to be.
Her flight’s not for a few more hours yet, so we’ve decided to come back to McDougal’s for her last supper before she makes her way to the airport and heads back home.
“You know; I think Jake’s Mam would approve.”
Woah, what? Where the hell did that just come from? “Sorry?” I ask, pretty sure that I must have heard her wrong. Yet my head whips up at the speed of lightening to make sure that Jake isn’t anywhere within hearing distance.
“Don’t worry.” She laughs at me. “He’s still at the bar ordering. All I mean is that you’re different. I’ve never seen Jake like this with someone before. It’s pretty sweet to watch, actually.”
My mouth goes dry and I struggle as I try to smile at her. I literally have no words and on the inside, my nerves are starting to get the better of me.
“I really hope that she gets to meet you one day.” Her eyes are shining bright and I’m shocked to find that she sounds really genuine too.
“I don’t know. It’s still early days yet, Amy.” Sitting here, I feel like she’s trying to marry us both off or something.
“Listen, all I’m saying is that I’ve noticed the way Jake looks at you and I know my cousin better than anybody else. You definitely mean something to him, Lucy.”
“Well, I guess he’s not too bad himself.” I try my best to make light of this sudden awkward situation that I have found myself in, but as if right on cue, my knight in shining armour appears right by my side.
“What are you two grinning about?”
Unable to meet his gaze, I hear him pull out a chair beside me, before he takes a seat.
“Nothing…” I begin.
“You…” Amy says at the same time.
Jake looks from both me to Amy and raises a suspicious brow. His confused expression looks really cute on him and I really want to reach out and squeeze him. “Okay… well I’m going to guess that Amy’s telling me the truth because you’re blushing like mad.”
Jesus, me and my bloody pale skin. I can never get away with anything. “Have I burnt?” I blurt out, trying to make a diversion.
“It was nothing bad, don’t worry.” Amy pipes up and thankfully, my blushing problem seems to be forgotten for now.
“Anything that comes out of your mouth is bad. Family or not, you should come with a warning,”
“Ah give over, man. All I was saying was that I think your Mam would approve of Lucy.”
“Seriously, Amy?” He asks. There’s a small smile on his face, but his voice has a warning tone hidden somewhere in it. I’m guessing that I need to keep well out of this one. Family affairs really aren’t for me.
“Oh, stop being such a mard-arse, Jake. Anyway, enough about you. Let’s get back to the important stuff, food. What did you order?”
“Well, I can remember a certain someone telling me that the toasties here are out of this world, so I ordered one for each of us.”
Just as I’m about to thank him for his thoughtfulness, Jose appears with our drinks.
“Damn, I wish I was here longer so that I could get me a piece of that.” Amy pouts while stalking after him. “Maybe I could come back. I can always crash with you, right Jake?”
“Hey, you do whatever you need to do. So long as you keep me out of your drama, I’ll be happy.”
“It’s a shame that you’re not staying longer. You’d have an absolute field day with my roommate. You’re practically both the same person.”
A small part of me kind of regrets the words as soon as I’ve said them out loud. Would I really be able to cope with both Amy and Fran? I think that’s more than enough to send anyone over the edge.
“Well, that’s settled then.” Amy smiles and it’s one hell of a wicked smile. One that promises fun, but a whole bunch of naughtiness too.
The only think that me and Jake can do is sit back and watch her expectantly as we await whatever it is that’s currently flooding through her mind.
“What is?” Jake asks when we get nothing from her.
“I’m coming back. I’ll go home today, sort some stuff out at the salon that needs my attention and then my little loves; I’ll be back.”
Well, I definitely wasn’t expecting that, that’s for sure. A sparkle shines bright in her eyes and I don’t know whether I should be scared of her.
“Hey Jake, you reckon you’d be able to hit me up with a job for the rest of the summer? It doesn’t really matter what, just so long as I’m working.”
How the hell did we get from her heading home to coming back and staying for the rest of the summer? I feel like I’ve missed out on a whole conversation, yet I’ve been sat here the whole time.
“I’ll have a word with Liam and see what he’s got going on, but I can’t promise anything, like.”
Amy wastes no time and before I know it, she’s diving over the table and throwing her grateful arms around Jake, almost taking my eye out in the process with her never ending, shiny bangles.
“See, this is why I love you. You are officially the world’s best cousin. Don’t you let anyone tell you any different.”
“Yeah, yeah, whatever.” Jake laughs back while trying to bat her off with his arms and he’s failing miserably. “Like I said, I can’t make any promises.”
After we’ve all eaten, I say my goodbyes to Amy. However, after our conversation earlier, I think she’s pretty adamant that it’s not really goodbye and we’ll be seeing her again very, very soon.
I just hope and pray that I’ll be able to survive the whirlwind that will be Amy and Fran.
“Do you want me to stop by yours later when I’m back?” I hear Jake’s deep rustic voice as he creeps up behind me, and then I feel his arms around my waist, before he holds me tight.
“I’d love you too, but unfortunately I’ve got to work.” Surprise,
surprise. My mood dips a little at the thought of work. I’ve had such a lovely, relaxing day with Jake and the last thing I feel like doing right now is working tonight. It should have been my night off, but Fran practically begged me to cover for her and once again, the ‘people pleaser’ in me came out and shot me right in the foot as usual.
Who knows, maybe one of these days I might just find that backbone of mine and use it. But for now, I’ll be feeling sorry for myself later on as I stand outside Poison while wishing that I was somewhere else entirely. I suppose it doesn’t really matter how much I moan about it, because it’s not really going to change anything, is it?
“Hey, quit with the glum face. It’s not all bad you know. I’m stopping by for a little while too.”
“You are?” He is? Why hasn’t he mentioned this sooner? “I thought you had the night off too?” I lean back into his hard, warm chest and close my eyes for a moment. I love being like this with him. It feels so natural, so right. I feel so comfortable. He makes me feel so safe, he makes me feel wanted and that in itself makes me feel like I can achieve anything with him by my side.
Even if he is working though, it doesn’t really change the fact that I won’t be spending any alone time with him as he’ll be upstairs working the bar and I’ll be downstairs handing out flyers.
“Yeah, but I’m not there all night. I think Liam just needs me to cover for a few hours.”
“I guess that’s not too bad then.” I say lightly, trying my best to shrug off my sudden foul mood.
“Nope, not when I’ll be coming to collect the most beautiful girl that this island has ever seen the minute that I have finished.”
A huge, mega watt smile lights up my whole face as his words. My whole body is eased at the sheer thought of finally being alone with Jake again.
“Tonight is going to drag so bad.” I mutter under my breath.
“You bet. But just think at the end of it, it’ll all be worth it.”
We head back to the apartments hand in hand, just like any normal couple would. The only difference being is that we’re not officially a couple. At least I don’t think we are, anyway.
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