by Rose, Ashley
“Stay.” She pressed his shoulder down. “I’ll take the couch.”
“No way, Lorna.”
“You need to sleep in a bed right now.”
“I’m not taking your bed.” He sat up with a groan.
“Yes, you are.” She pushed him back down.
“Lorna. The only way I’m sleeping in this bed is if you are too.”
“Shep.”
“Lorna.”
She looked down at him and could tell that he meant it. “Fine.” She shut off the light and eased onto the bed as he scooted to make room for her. “You better not snore.”
He slid his hand onto her leg under the blanket. “Wouldn’t dream of it.”
She pushed his hand off and turned onto her side away from him. “Goodnight.”
“Goodnight. And...thanks.”
16
Lily
Lily was jittery as she prepared for Miles to come over. She had done as much reading as possible after he’d left the day before. According to her books, it was more appropriate for him to come hang out with her, since she had a room with roommates, than with him alone at his house. They were planning more talking today, which reinforced what Lily learned in the books—that communication was key to relationships. She also had to talk to him about defining what exactly was going on between them.
She’d cleaned her room until it was spotless and made sure the common area was welcoming also. He was supposed to arrive soon, and she wondered if it would be a good idea for her to have some food or beverages to offer him. She barely had time to worry about it, though, because a knock sounded on her door.
Lily hurried to open it with a big smile on her face. “Hi, Mi—” But the boy in the doorway was not Miles. He was much taller and more built. “Beck!”
Her big brother grinned at her. “You look surprised to see me, little sis.”
She’d forgotten, but it didn’t matter—she missed him so much.
“Aren’t you going to give me a hug?”
She squealed and wrapped her arms around his neck. Her brother was the best at hugs. When he hugged her, his arms completely enveloped her torso, and she felt like nothing in the world could ever hurt her.
“I’ve missed you,” she murmured into his chest, hugging him tighter.
“I’ve missed you too.” He pulled away with a kiss on the top of her head.
“Is Carmondy here?” Lily really liked Beck’s girlfriend, who’d been instrumental in helping with social aspects of her care when she was younger, and also in making her brother happy, which was priceless.
“She’s visiting some friends we’re going to hang out with later, but she should be here soon.”
She beamed up at her brother, who hugged her again.
“You have to tell me everything that you’ve been doing,” he told her.
She pulled him over to the couch and they sat down. “A lot of things have been going on.”
“Yeah?” He leaned toward her. “I’m sorry I returned your call so late. But everything is okay?”
She nodded. “Yes. Everything is fine.”
“Good. Now, how are classes?”
“They are okay. Sometimes I get headaches from the power-point presentations, but the support center is helping me manage it.”
“They better,” he said, brows furrowed.
She grabbed his hand and smiled at him. It was amazing to have him around again. He was her rock. He’d always been with her growing up, even while he dealt with problems of his own. He had helped her through the tough parts, even after their parents had pretty much left her to rot, unable to face being shackled with a psycho for a daughter. “It’s hard without you though. I’ve had so many questions, and I don’t have anyone to ask.”
“I’m sorry, sis.” He pulled her against his side. “But I think it’s a good thing. You seem to be doing great. And your doctors said that the more you learn to live independently, the better you are going to get.”
“Yeah, it’s just hard.” She rested her head on his shoulder and closed her eyes for a moment, wishing he could be there with her all the time.
“Uhh...” A voice sounded from the open door and Lily sat up.
“Oh! Miles.” She’d almost forgotten about him already.
“Yeah, am I interrupting something? Because I can—” He jerked his thumb over his shoulder. “Yeah. I think I’ll just go.”
She didn’t recognize the expression on his face, a mix of anger, hurt, and something else.
“Wait! Miles, stop.” She hurried off the couch to grab his arm. “Where are you going?”
He turned to her, and she recognized the look. Betrayal. She knew that feeling well and recognized it easily. “You know what...I should have known better. You’re so pretty—there was no way you didn’t already have a boyfriend. So this is my fault,” he said in a clipped tone. “And I’m just going to leave. No hard feelings.” He tried to leave but she grabbed his arm with the other hand and pulled him back.
“I don’t understand.” She looked at Beck and then back to Miles, confused. “We were going to talk, I thought. I don’t know what you’re talking about, me having a boyfriend. I thought you were going to be my boyfriend.”
Beck stood up. Miles frowned. Lily just got more confused.
“You have a boyfriend?” her brother demanded.
“You don’t have a boyfriend?” Miles asked at the same time.
She winced. She’d never been able to handle that double processing thing. “No. I mean, yes.” She looked between them. “I don’t but I thought—” She groaned and put a hand to her head as the pain started up, which happened whenever she got worked up or confused.
Beck recognized it right away. “Whoa, whoa, whoa.” He rounded the couch and took Lily’s arms, turning her gently to face him. “There is no big deal. Take some deep breaths and calm down.”
Miles must have tried to leave again because Beck reached out and yanked him into the room with one hand and then kicked the door shut. “We are going to have a talk, whoever you are.” He looked back a Lily. “You all right?”
She nodded, and with some slowed breathing, the pain went away.
“Now.” Beck gestured to Miles. “Who is this boy?”
“No one,” Miles said. “Lily didn’t tell me she had a boyfriend, but it’s okay. Don’t worry about it.” He tried to leave for the third time, but Beck clamped a firm hand on his shoulder.
“I’m Beck. Lily’s brother. Now answer me—who are you?”
Miles looked between Lily and Beck. His expression told her that something was clicking into place in his mind. “Oh—you’re not—oh, you look alike.”
“Yeah,” Beck snapped. “That’s because she’s my sister.”
“Oh...”
“Your turn,” Beck said expectantly.
“I’m Miles...a friend.”
“What kind of friend?” Beck demanded, stepping closer.
“Beck.” Lily recognized this behavior as overly protective. It wasn’t okay. “Please, don’t be rude. I like him.”
“Are you guys seeing each other?” Beck demanded.
That was kind of a stupid question. “Not all the time, I guess, but often enough.”
Beck’s eyes flared with anger, and he rounded on the boy again.
“Wait, wait, wait,” Miles said, stepping back, “She didn’t mean it like that.”
A knock on the door made Beck finally stop glaring. “That must be Car,” he muttered, still keeping an eye on Miles as he opened the door to reveal his smiling girlfriend. “Hey, baby.” He gave her a one-armed hug and kissed her cheek.
“Hello.” She kissed him back before smiling at Lily. “Hey there!” Carmondy gave Lily a tight hug before pulling back. “How are you?”
“I’m good. A bit confused right now, but things have been okay.”
The taller girl kept an arm around her shoulders while she turned to the two boys. “Of course you’re confused. There are two handsome
boys standing in your living room. I’m guessing this is a friend of yours?”
Lily nodded.
Beck opened his mouth but Car shot him a look that said she’d handle it.
“Hi.” Car held her hand out to Miles. “I’m Beck’s girlfriend and a friend of Lily’s.”
“Hi, I’m Miles, just a friend of Lily’s.”
“Lily said you were seeing each other!” Beck accused.
“We’re not,” Mile insisted.
“But—” Lily stopped short, remembering something in the relationship books. She hurried to her room and flipped to the glossary of one of the books.
Seeing him/her: see Dating
She hurried back out to the other three, who were still looking at each other. “No. My mistake, we are not ‘seeing each other’ but we do see each other. I was confused. Sorry.”
Beck looked relieved and came to give her another big hug.
“Though according to my readings, that is the direction that Miles and I are headed. But the books also say that these things can be really tricky, so you never know.”
Beck pulled back, taking a deep breath.
Miles’ face slowly broke into a smile. “Did you just ask me out?”
Her eyes widened. “Did I?”
Carmondy nodded. “Sorta.”
“Oh.” Lily put a hand to her mouth in case something else she didn’t mean to say popped out.
“No,” Beck said firmly.
“What?” Carmondy and Lily said at the same time.
Beck rounded on Miles. “You. Me. Hallway. Now.”
The boy took a step back warily. Understandable. Beck had the family height and muscle that Lily hadn’t, and his bite was just as bad as his bark.
“Beck.” Carmondy stepped between them and put her hand on her boyfriend’s chest. “Why don’t you let me take care of this?”
He shook his head. “No, I have some things so say to him.”
“I can handle it.” She used a special tone that Lily had only ever heard her use on her brother.
“Car...”
“You trust me.” It wasn’t a question but a statement.
“You know I do.”
Car gave him a meaningful look and then turned and followed Miles out into the hallway and shut the door. Beck stared at the door as if he could see through it for several seconds, before turning to her.
“What exactly have you and Miles...done?”
“Well, he bought me an Italian soda once. And we’ve talked. I spent some time at his place once. And he helped me carry my—”
“Whoa. Back up. His place?”
“Yeah. He has a house near campus.”
“Are you having sex with him?”
She blinked. “No. But according to the books, that could happen anytime between now and marriage, depending on—”
“Yeah, yeah, the books, the books.” He put his hands on her shoulders. “Forget the books for a second.”
“I can’t.”
“Try.” He used a firm tone that he rarely used on her, only when it was important.
She took a deep breath. “Okay.”
“Do you like him? Romantically?”
“I think so. It’s hard to tell because I’m not sure I’ve ever felt it before.”
“Lily, you have to—”
The door opened and the other two came back in. Carmondy smiled, stopping just inside in the doorway. Miles looked slightly shaken. “Lily. Your turn. You two.” She pointed at the two boys. “Sit and play nice.”
Lily went out into the hall with Car as the two sat on opposite sides of the living room. Miles was looking out the window while Beck glared at him.
“What did you say to Miles?” Lily asked as they stood alone in the hallway.
“Just basic stuff. Now I can tell that you and Miles haven’t done anything, but you are thinking about it. Things like kissing, and sex.”
She nodded. “It’s standard relationship stuff.”
“It is. And you’re an adult so I don’t need to have a sex talk with you. You know about condoms and birth control and all that stuff.”
Lily nodded. “I do. I mean, I have problems, it’s not anything new. But I’m not a child. I’m really not. And I know that Beck, as my older brother and with the personality that he has, can’t help being who he is. But I wish he would understand that I’m an adult, and all of the research I’ve done has told me that I need to learn for myself. I just can’t tell him that because he’s too important to me.”
Carmondy nodded. “I understand. And I think Beck will come around.”
Lily nodded.
“Relationships are hard, but I think you can make it work. Miles seems like a nice boy. And Beck and I aren’t going to get involved or anything, because like I said, you are both adults.”
Lily nodded again.
“Whether Beck wants to face it or not, this is something you are going to have to work out for yourself. I have faith in you.”
“Thanks.” Lily was thankful for how understanding Carmondy was. And since the girl had tamed her brother, she trusted her knowledge of romance.
When they entered the room again, Beck was alone, but Lily could hear the fan going in the bathroom.
“He smokes,” Beck said, getting up from the couch.
Lily nodded.
“How about we finish this talk over lunch?” Carmondy suggested. “I’m starving. Lily, why don’t you invite Miles since we seemed to have interrupted something.”
Lily went and knocked on the door before cracking it open. Miles was standing on the tub, blowing smoke into the exhaust fan.
“Hey.” He hopped down and quickly put the cigarette out in the sink.
“I’m sorry we can’t have our talk right now, but Beck is just in town for the day. They want to take me to lunch now. Will you come?”
“Do you want me to? I’m sure you want to spend time with your brother.”
“I want you to. Please.”
“All right. Sure.”
She smiled and hugged him.
He seemed surprised at first but hugged her back. “Sorry if I smell like smoke.”
She pressed her face into his shoulder and inhaled. “Nope.” She pulled away and took his hand as they left the bathroom.
Beck hadn’t seemed very happy with going to lunch with Miles, but Carmondy had pinched the back of his arm when she didn’t think that Lily could see and he stopped grumbling. Everything seemed back to normal as they ate their meal, albeit in a slightly awkward silence. They’d chosen an eatery just on the edge of campus, and Carmondy was attempting to keep the conversation going.
“So, you two, did you have something planned for the day? I hope we didn’t make you guys miss anything.”
Lily shook her head. “We hadn’t made formal plans.”
“Good. You’ll have lots of time to yourselves once Beck and I are out of your hair.”
Beck was frowning and dissecting his sandwich, muttering something about too much lettuce.
“I like having you guys here,” Lily said. “I missed you a lot.” She was referring to Beck, more than Carmondy actually, which they both knew. Lily felt her heart sink as Beck didn’t respond, just kept poking at his sandwich.
Carmondy’s jaw clenched, and she turned to Beck with a sweet smile. “Can I talk to you for a minute?” She didn’t wait for an answer, just grabbed his arm and pulled him away from the table. Lily watched them go around the corner and couldn’t help getting up to spy on them.
She turned to Miles. “I...”
He just smiled. “I’ll watch the table.”
Lily hurried to where they disappeared and stayed just out of sight as Carmondy and Beck stopped near the entrance of the kitchen.
“What?” Beck asked.
“Look. I get it, you don’t like Lily even thinking about boys. But guess what? She’s a young woman and it was bound to happen. Now either you are going to be a part of that, and support her and help her make good
decisions. Or,” she poked him hard in the chest, “you’re going to be a child about it and show her no support at all. Now that boy is nice, and you have absolutely no right to judge him, because at his age, you were getting in fights, thrown into jail, and sleeping around. Not to mention treating girls like complete shit.”
“I—”
She stopped him with a hand. “I know how hard this must be for you, Beck, and I understand. You practically raised her yourself. But damn it, your sister needs you. The strong you, not this petty and pouty you. And I’m sorry to say it, but with her, with her situation, you either need to be a part of it or out of it completely, because she still looks up to you and if you had been paying attention you would have seen her face in there. She wants your approval so much. It’s important to her because you are important to her. But I think that deep down she knows that it’s more important to become independent, no matter how much she wants to try stay on the same page as you. At this rate, you’re either going to lose her, or you’re going to ruin her chance at having a normal life. Okay?”
Beck was silent for a moment, staring at Carmondy. Then he slowly slid his arms around her and held her against his chest. Carmondy put her arms around his waist also, hugging him.
“I love you so much,” Beck murmured to her.
“I love you too. Which is why I’m going off on you.”
Beck pulled back and pressed a kiss to her lips. “And I’m glad you did. You’re right, I’m being stupid. Lily needs me.”
Lily hurried back to her seat as they turned back toward the table. She smiled at Miles as she sat down. When Beck and Carmondy arrived back at the table, Beck finally looked ready to engage in conversation with them.
“So. You said you didn’t have plans?”
Miles seemed slightly surprised and then nodded. “Yeah. I figured we could just...you know, find something. Casual.” He looked at Lily and shrugged. “Maybe dinner or a movie or something.”
“No movie,” Beck said.
“Beck,” Carmondy snapped, slapping his arm.
“No, I mean,” Beck nodded to Lily, “she can’t do movie theaters. Too loud and bright.”
Lily bit her lip and looked down at her plate.
Miles just shrugged and put his arm on the back of her chair. “Not a problem. We could rent one instead.” His hand touched her shoulder, and she relaxed a little. “I’d honestly rather stay in anyway.”