Once Upon a Star - Celebrity kiss and tell stories

by Peggy Trentini

  Chapter 9

  Kevin Costner

  No Way Out

  The best part about Tuesday nights was that my phone never rang. I learned it was this strange calm falling between the recovery of last weekend and the drum roll to the next. I kept it as a personal day. I cleaned my house and made myself a nice dinner. I liked to watch movies and paint my nails. Tuesdays, for me, were almost a religious sort of thing. So when my phone did ring on this particular Tuesday, it felt like some strange omen coming from the other room. I debated answering. I let the machine get it. No message. It rang again. I thought whoever it was better have something damn good to say, and I wasn’t surprised when it was my girlfriend, Toni. She was practically climbing through the receiver. She had been invited to a private party at Kevin Costner’s house by his assistant, and was told to bring her prettiest friend. I won’t lie; I was flattered she thought it was me. I think that was why I said yes.

  I had met Kevin once before. I’d seen him in movies a hundred times. He had that American smile, and a way about him that said, “Don’t worry girl, I’ll take care of you.” I doubt he would, though. I started to doubt if anyone would, at this point. I was eighteen when I met him on the Raleigh studio lot. He introduced himself in the commissary, and I just about choked on my Jell-O. I was shooting a Payless commercial, and, when I told him how old I was, he immediately backed off like I had rabies. I remember thinking of how gorgeous he was. I think that’s also why I said yes that Tuesday night.

  Toni picked me up and we raced through the hills with all the windows down. I hadn’t seen her in weeks; she had been off shooting a movie in Mexico that I doubt anyone ever saw. We had so much to catch up on. Before I knew it, we were pulling up in front of his ranch style home. The grounds were incredible and masculine. Clearly there was no woman around; it was missing that certain something. There were only a few cars in the driveway, and I remember thinking that either we were way too early, or that this party was a lot more private than I had thought.

  We were greeted by his friend, John, and a girlfriend of Toni’s who I immediately deducted had put this whole charade together. Her husband was sitting on the couch, drinking bourbon, and raised his glass to us. I looked to my left and there was Kevin, sitting at the kitchen table, looking devilishly handsome. He stood up to introduce himself, and I melted. I was that eighteen-year-old girl again, sitting in the commissary. I knew there was no way he remembered that, but I could never forget.

  “Can I get you ladies a drink?” he asked.

  “Yes, I would love a chardonnay,” I said.

  “Me too,” said Toni.

  I could tell she was more nervous than I was, because she wasn’t saying much, and left most of the spotlight to me. I didn’t mind. I quickly realized no one else was coming. This was a very private party and we offered for the dessert.

  There was an incredible picture above the fireplace, and I remember standing in front of it for a long time while everyone else buzzed behind me. It was photograph of charging buffalo. You could feel the strength through the picture, almost hear them racing. It was truly a work of art. Kevin snuck up behind me and spoke in my ear.

  “You know, I took that picture,” he said.

  “You don’t say?”

  “Yeah, while we were shooting Dances with Wolves, this one was my favorites. I can still feel the way it felt that day,” he said.

  If it was possible to be more attracted to him than I already was, then that was the moment. He had this shy demeanor about him, and it was with an almost reserved way that he spoke about the photograph, hoping I would be impressed or approve. I approved. I most definitely approved.

  “How about some Jacuzzi time?” John shouted across the room, interrupting my moment with Kevin.

  Kevin looked at me questioningly.

  “Toni and I don’t have suits,” I said.

  “It’s fine, I’ll skinny dip,” Toni said, pulling her shirt over her head. She was already jealous, and I couldn’t blame her for trying to steal some of the spotlight back. I was starting to feel more like a sacrificial lamb as every moment passed, and I opted to wear my bra and panties in, instead. I wondered if this was a weekly tradition for Mr. Costner.

  I saw Kevin from the corner of my eye, watching my strip down while everyone else headed outside. I turned away. My smile was so big, I looked like I had just struck gold. I could tell Toni liked him. She grabbed him by the hand and led him outside, completely naked. In the Jacuzzi, Toni and I sat on either side of Kevin, clearly vying for his attention. John held most of the conversation. He seemed to never run out of things to say, and I was sure that was why Kevin kept him around. A constant entertainer he was. John kept asking us all sorts of personal questions about our life, our work, where we were from, what we dreamed of. It was actually really fun.

  “This is my first ever hot tub interview,” I said.

  Kevin laughed and I caught his gaze, held it, and then slid my hand over his thigh. I saw him jump a bit and noticed his breath quicken. He wasted no time sliding his hand across my leg. Toni was rambling about something, and Kevin could hardly finish his sentences. I knew this wasn’t necessarily a competition, but if it was, I had already won.

  “Maybe we should all get out of here before we turn to prunes,” Kevin said, as my hand found its way past his thigh. He helped Toni climb out and I waited for his help, as well. He towelled me off and said,

  “Why don’t you take those wet things off; here, I won’t look,” and he held up the towel in front of me.

  “What if I wanted you to look?” He opened his eyes and watched me like an anxious schoolboy. Being had for dessert started to feel a lot better than it did a few hours ago.

  “You. You’re looking incredible. You’re incredible,” Kevin said stumbling over his words. “Is it okay to kiss you?” he said.

  I didn’t answer, I just kissed him. I opened the towel and wrapped him up with me, pressing my naked body against his, and I felt him, hard against my leg. He led me inside, and, as we passed Toni, I tried to ignore the look of complete disappointment on her face.

  The fire was already lit in his bedroom. He picked me up and laid me on a soft rug in front of it, opened my towel like a gift, and started kissing my entire body. I felt his strong arms at my side as he placed me beneath him. He handled me like fine china, and kissed me deeply. He really was an all American boy. His love making, like his smile, and like his house, and like his energy, was old fashioned, traditional, and mighty fine. There was nothing kinky, nothing sordid, no biting and grabbing, or screaming. It was fireside lovemaking, and I almost felt like I was in a scene of one of his movies, the way everything was so methodically perfect.

  He was slow and purposeful with each thrust, and he kept my gaze until I would look away or close my eyes. My breath started to quicken and I could feel myself climaxing. I was moaning louder, and he said,

  “I love the noises you make, you’re so sexy. I want you to look into my eyes when you come.”

  “Yes,” I said, and I kept his gaze while I could feel it catching within me. Like a low rolling thunder, it started from far away. He could feel me, and every thrust had the perfect intention; it hit right where I needed it. I looked deep into his eyes. It was one of the longest and most intense orgasms I’ve ever had. I yelled out and felt it ring through my entire body. He finished with me and held me in his arms as my legs shook and I caught my breath. He kissed me again and then laid me down softly. We lay there for a while, stroking each other, both glowing and buzzing from what we had just shared.

  He started telling me stories, and, as I lay there, falling into the rhythm of his voice, I could feel myself falling for him. I could see that I could really like him, and that scared me a little bit. I was having such a great time that I had completely forgotten about Toni. I had partly assumed she just left me there, and I wouldn’t have blamed her. Just as I thought such things, there was a light knock at the door.

  “Come i
n,” Kevin said. I was a bit surprised, because we were both still naked on the rug, but I still didn’t bother to move. It was Toni, and she sheepishly entered the room.

  “I’m sorry to barge in guys, but I was wondering if you wanted me to leave, or if you wanted a ride home,” she said. I knew that was not what she was wondering, because Toni would have just left if that was what she wanted. I could see her eyeing Kevin, and she came in the room and sat at the edge of the rug. We all sat talking for a moment, and I decided that the best way for me not to fall in love with Kevin was to get up right then, and share him with Toni. It sounds crazy, I know. It was this strange insurance policy I had with myself. I knew this situation could go two ways, and I was still in control. I had to get on with it before it got on with me.

  “I am going to go rinse off. You two be good while I’m gone,” I said, getting up, and smiled devilishly, giving Toni the go ahead once I left the room. I took my sweet time standing in his massive shower, and when I came out, the two of them were going at it like rabbits on the bed. I stood at the edge of bed, watching, and growing increasingly turned on, which surprised me as much as it delighted me. When Toni came, Kevin grabbed me and threw me on the bed, finishing himself off while Toni watched. She slipped out of the room and went to take a shower.

  Kevin apologized; I think more because he thought that’s what I wanted to hear rather than actually being sorry. There was nothing to be sorry about, because I had made sure to make it that way.

  “Sorry for what? Having some fun? Isn’t that what this is all about?”

  I was partly serious, and the other part of me was testing him. Wanted to see his reaction and try to figure it out if he really liked me. What he really liked, though, was the fact that I didn’t care that I had just watched him fuck my best friend in front of me. He asked if I could stay the night, but I had an early call time and I hadn’t even meant to stay out so late, being a Tuesday and all. I graciously declined, and kissed him until Toni came back.

  Toni was glowing, and, I think, surprised, when I told her I was ready to leave. She climbed on the bed and kissed Kevin, as well, and the three of us lay there for a little while like a strange, but happy, couple. When the time came, he walked us out to our car and kissed us both goodbye.

  The Phone Call

  It couldn’t have been more than a day or so later. I was waking up early all week for 6 a.m. call times. When the phone rang, I knew it was too early, even for a production assistant. I ran to grab it and tripped over a pair of shoes. I slid on a t-shirt and ran into the bookshelf, and answered with a thud.

  “Peggy,” he said. It was Kevin - I couldn’t mistake that voice. He sounded sad or distant, like he was calling from another time and place entirely. Considering the hour, I knew something was up.

  “I didn’t want to wake you, but...”

  “No, I was just running out the door for work,” I said.

  “Do you have a few minutes?”

  I really didn’t, but I said, “For you, of course I do.”

  “Do you know a club promoter named Kevin Brady?”

  “Yeah, he’s a friend of mine,” I said. Kevin was the promoter for Bar One and had been the inlet of many a good night. He was constantly getting my girls and me over there for free drinks and dinners to make the place look good. We were like bait for big celebrities, but I always just wanted to have a good time.

  “Well, he didn’t have very nice things to say about you.”

  Now I was awake. My blood started boiling up to my ears.

  “What sort of ‘not nice’ things do you mean?” I asked.

  “Well, to be blunt, he called you a star-fucker. He said you’re trouble and a liar. He ran through a list of guys you’ve been with and told me the story where you got Sly into a whole mess of trouble with some tabloids. He said you couldn’t be trusted.”

  “Listen here, Kevin Brady is a gossip mill and a lonely man, and I wouldn’t expect someone like you to go around listening to idle gossip coming from someone like him, but clearly I am wrong about you.”

  “And clearly I was wrong about you,” he said.

  I could feel tears on my red hot cheeks, burning streaks down my face. He had the nerve to keep going. I tried to keep from allowing him to hear me cry through the phone.

  “Look, I just can’t be around people I don’t trust.”

  His hypocrisy made no sense to me. He was fine with having us over to his own home, when he didn’t know me, didn’t have to trust me, have sex with me, and my girlfriend, but this was too much for him?

  “I’m late for work, can we talk later?” I said through broken breaths.

  “No, I don’t really think there is much more to say. Bye, Peggy,” he hung up the phone.

  And that is how I never spoke to Kevin Costner again.

  I started to collect my things and myself. I was due on set in twenty minutes on the other side of town. Impossible. I had it in my right mind to call Kevin Brady and cuss him out. I probably would have if I hadn’t been so late.

  As I drove across town, I was glad I didn’t call him. It would have only fuelled his fire. He wasn’t going to take back the things he said or change Kevin’s mind. That wasn’t the point. I thought he was my friend, but I was learning real friends were hard to come by in this town. If most people had to hold you under to keep themselves afloat, they’d do it in a heartbeat.

  I continued driving, and I was going over it in my mind, the things Kevin had said. I was so angry with him. I wanted to drive up to his stupid ranch styled house and put my shoe through that painting. I got stuck at a red light on Melrose, and I asked myself something my mother used to ask me when I was upset as a child. “Who are you really mad at? What is really wrong?” The light turned green and someone honked behind me.

  As I waded through the filth of the question I had now posed myself, I started to see things a little more clearly. The fog was lifting, the clouds were moving. I wasn’t mad at Kevin Brady; I was hurt, but not mad. I certainly had no right to be mad at Kevin Costner. He was just trying to protect himself, and when I looked at the heaping pile of shit he was given, well, I wouldn’t have spoken to me anymore, either. Then I started to look at the pile of shit.

  I started to see that it was one thing to be up in arms about idle gossip, about nonsensical hurtful rumors, but this was another story. Is it still gossip if it’s true?

  I was angry with myself. Ding! I didn’t have to go to therapy to figure that out. I just had to drive across L.A. in morning traffic.

  Of course, Kevin didn’t know the truth behind all my relationships, but, from the outside, or on paper, what he heard was true. I had dated, or had been with those men, and I had sold out Sly to the tabloids. There was so much more that I would never explain to him but the facts and those were true.

  Hearing them delivered to me, the details of my own life, was heartbreaking. It all sounded so good in my head, it had been so great, but that landslide of truth was more than I could bear.

  I started to feel panicked; a slow creeping panic that began that morning. They say that ignorance is bliss, but that morning, I was no longer ignorant. I started to see everything, and the weeks that followed were some of my darkest times. It was like the sheen had been taken off Hollywood. Had it always been this dirty?

  I pulled into the lot at the studio, flustered and deep in thought. What were all these people doing? Were they happy? Was I happy? The bubble had been cracked, and reality was seeping through the fissure.

  Chapter 10

  David Cassidy

  I Think I Love You

  It could have been any day of the week; it could have been any week in those few fast years. There was nothing indistinguishable about the night, and I remember sitting at Bar One, against my better judgment, and thinking those very thoughts. The edges around my world were getting sharp, and I could feel them pressing against me. I was becoming more aware of this world, and the more I could see, the more I wanted out. I dra
nk more than usual these days, because after a few, the thoughts quieted and the room got dimmer and everyone was interesting again.