by Amy Marie
She shrugs. “Well, Casen was trying to finger fuck you under the table. Reece barely touched me.”
“You saw that, huh?” I laugh.
“Yeah,” she answers, pushing her hair behind her ear. “Of course, I saw it. It’s hard to miss a woman almost coming across the table from me. It was hot, though. Got me a little worked up, not that Reece tried to help me in that department anyways.”
“Jesus,” I retort. “That’s really uncomfortable.”
“Well,” She leans back, giving the server room to drop our soup off. “How do you think Reece and I felt, watching his arm move back and forth under your skirt?”
I shoosh her until we’re alone again. “Apparently, worked up.”
She laughs but then straightens out. “But, seriously. Do you think he isn’t into me?”
“Look. I don’t know how I feel about Reece and you together but, from what I can tell, and what I’ve seen, he seems to be really into you. There is no mistaking that. Has he called you since Saturday?”
She nods, blowing on her soup.
“Has he asked you out again?”
“Yes, he has.” She takes a moment before continuing. “For a friend’s birthday get together this weekend. Aren’t you going? It’s for that Ian guy. The one who gave you the creeps.”
My shoulder slump. Casen didn’t ask me to go. Maybe he thinks because of what happened at the bar with Ian that I wouldn’t want to go. Either that or he just doesn’t want me to go. The insecure thought sweeps through and I shut it down immediately. Casen is a sweet guy. He probably didn’t ask because he didn’t want me to feel uncomfortable or put me in the position that I would have to say no. But then, what if he isn’t going because I’m not? Fuck, this relationship stuff is dramatic.
“Trinity, if he is calling you and asking you out, especially to somewhere there will, most likely, be a lot of his friends, then I wouldn’t give it a second thought. Maybe he is just trying to make sure you know he likes you for you before he tries to fuck your brains out.”
It’s Trinity’s turn to shoosh me now. “Why do you have to be so loud?” she asks, while looking around. I just laugh at her.
Our salad shows up and we fall into easy conversation. I told her about my job search and she is over the moon happy for me. She tells me about living with a single mom and crazy kids. I don’t envy her. I miss her at the condo and I let her know she is welcome to come back anytime.
Before we can finish our salads, our plates of sushi are dropped off, and I notice the restaurant is now buzzing with patrons.
“Damn,” I moan, taking my first bite of shrimp tempura. “This is fucking amazing.”
“I know, right? I’ve wanted to come back here since the first time Hadley brought me,” she responds and shakes her empty water glass. Searching around for the server she turns her head but doesn’t look back for almost a full ten seconds. She looks at me, then back where she is staring. It’s starting to freak me out.
“What’s up?” I ask.
Trinity situates herself to face me again. “Just something weird.” She glances over her shoulder. This time, I see what she sees and my heart stops.
A woman, sitting in a booth just across the room is staring straight at me. Not just any woman. One that is very familiar. Alexia Monroe, one of the most popular girls from my high school class, is less than thirty feet from me and looking as though she knows me.
“Who is that?” Trinity asks, breaking the spell.
I shake my head. “I don’t know. So weird that she is just gawking at me.”
Trinity lets it go. “Maybe she is jealous of how fucking sexy you look today,” she muses. That makes me laugh. I look down at my pink t-shirt, jeans, and flip flops. “Real fucking sexy. I bet Casen would finally bang you.”
I can feel my face blush.
“Oh my God,” Trinity screeches. “He banged you already, hasn’t he?”
When I don’t answer she reaches over and slaps my arm. “He did. And you’re blushing, which means it was fucking awesome! I knew, as soon as he stopped at our table, that he was a great lay. I mean, you can tell just from looking at those fucking hands. You have to give me all the details.”
My phone chimes in my purse, and I use it to delay this conversation. I’m not shy about talking to her about sex, but the things that Casen did to me this weekend are worth the rosy cheeks I’m sporting. I grab my phone from my purse and smile.
Casen: I’m about to take a nap, lying in my bed, wishing you were here so I could fuck that pussy with my tongue.
Me: Aren’t there people around?
Casen: That didn’t stop you from putting those pretty lips around my cock and sucking me dry.
I can feel my panties get wet and I’m about to tell him just that when Trinity rips the phone from my hands. She gasps. “Holy shit, Em. He has a dirty mouth. You should wash it out with your pussy juice.”
My mouth goes wide before I burst in a fit of laughter. “That’s so crude! You did not just say that!”
“I sure as hell did,” she states matter-of-factly, obviously proud of herself. I have to say, I’m a little proud of her, too. That was a good one. “Now, let’s finish up here, so you can go help that man fall asleep.”
“How is your idea of putting him to sleep going to make him actually sleep?”
Trinity raises her hand, finally finding the server and giving her the universal sign for the check. “Fuck him unconscious.”
Reaching for my wallet, I shake my head. Her dirty mouth and thoughts are why we get along so well. I never wanted to get close to anyone for a really long time. I’m so thankful I have met Trinity. I’m starting to see things a lot clearer today and I know I have a great, long lasting friend in her.
Our check is placed down and I throw my debit card on top of it, insisting that I pay. She allows it. We wait for the bill to be brought back, and I feel eyes on me again. Across the room, Alexia is still zeroed in on me and, if I didn’t care about drawing attention to myself or think that I might get recognized, I would go over there and ask her what the fuck her problem is.
She wasn’t mean in high school, though she did have a thing for Patrick for a long time. I know this because we had most classes together my senior year and his name was the only thing that came out of her mouth. I wanted to punch her every time she talked about him but she didn’t know what he had done. How could she have? All she knew was what was portrayed by the incidents that year. I was a whore who let people video tape me having sex. She never said as much, but the dirty looks and rude comments made by her friends told me she wasn’t oblivious. I always wondered why Alexia never said anything about what happened. Why she had been so nice to me.
The check gets paid and I drop Trinity back off at work. As I pull away, my phone rings and Casen’s voice comes over the Bluetooth in the car.
“Hey, baby,” he greets. I smile at his endearment.
“Hi. I thought you were going to sleep.”
Casen clears his throat. “I was just calling to see why you didn’t respond to my text.”
I laugh. “Because Trinity had taken it out of my hand before I had a chance. I was going to call you on my way home. I just left from having lunch with her.”
“Hmm, Ok. I wasn’t sure if I scared you.”
I merge onto the highway. “No, you didn’t scare me.”
“Just making sure. So, I don’t know if you have any plans for this Friday night but I was wondering if you would like to go to Ian’s. He is having a get together for his birthday.” He sounds nervous. It’s kind of cute.
“Sure,” I answer.
“Okay. I know you didn’t start on the best terms with him and, after what I told you he did in high school, I wasn’t sure you would still want to hang out with those two. I’m actually surprised you still want to see me.”
I think on that for a moment. “The past is in the past.” And for the first time, I really feel that way.
My hands shake a
s I put the finishing touches on my make-up. It’s Saturday night and Casen is on his way to pick me up for Ian’s get together. I wish my nerves would calm just a little bit so my eye liner didn’t look like a two-year-old put it on.
I can’t quite put a finger on why I feel this way. I just feel very anxious. I haven’t seen Casen all week though, we have spent hours talking on the phone. Our schedules just didn’t match up. I’ve kept myself busy with working out, job hunting, and trying to rid myself of the nastiness that has consumed my life for a decade. It’s almost like a detox of emotions. I’m trying to push the old, negative thoughts out and bring in brand new, shiny ones. It sounds like it would be easy to do but that is so far from the truth.
I went and visited my parents at their gravesites yesterday. It was surreal. I hadn’t been to see them in so long. The days have been beautiful and I was able to just sit there and share all that has been happening in my life and how I plan to make them proud. They would be horrified at what I have been doing.
After that tape was released, the entire town heard about it and got to witness the first time I gave myself to someone. My parents tried to be understanding. I hated having to explain to them that I didn’t consent to being recorded. My father, being a police officer, was furious and was set on bringing up charges, anything to make those guys pay. I guess there are people way more powerful than him; nothing was ever done. It was my choice to go back to school afterward. I wanted to be brave. I wanted to show all of those kids that no matter what the PITCREW did to me, I was strong. But, life just kept throwing everything at me. My mom committed suicide. My dad died. In the matter of two years, I felt like I had lost everything. Now, I feel like maybe there is a light at the end of the long tunnel. I have a good friend in Trinity and maybe, just maybe, things with Casen will work out. I just know that there is a chance I might have to tell him and that thought scares the shit out of me. I don’t know him well enough to gauge how he will react.
I bite my lip when I hear a soft knocking at my front door and take a deep breath. It’s the first time I’ve seen him since we made ourselves official. A month ago, I wouldn’t have even dreamed I would be happy about it.
The door swings open, warm air filing into my apartment from out in the hallways. Casen stands there with his back to me and when he turns, I lose my breath. He looks so fucking sexy. I take a moment to appreciate every inch of him from toe to top. The jeans he wears are dark denim that squeezes his large thighs. A belt with a large silver buckle secures them around his hips that I know hold that glorious v that women love. Barely containing his strong torso and unbelievably ripped arms is a red, short sleeve t-shirt. I’ve never seen him wear that color but it has to be his best. By the time I reach his face, a devious smile plays across his lips. My body quivers beneath his stare. I’ve waited my whole life to have someone make me feel this way with just a look.
He stalks me into my apartment, shutting the door, and wraps his giant hands around my jaw before crashing his lips to mine. With their own mind, my fingers reach up and clutch the soft material of his shirt, holding on for dear life. I’m letting go and it feels amazing. I want to feel like this all the time. I want to get lost in him and never find myself again. My lungs gasp for air but I don’t care if I ever breathe again. My life has so drastically changed over the past seven days and, for as long as I can remember, I feel happy.
My dress bunches as he glides his knuckles up the side of my thigh, his fingers spreading when they reach my ass. He burrows them into my panties and clutches my cheeks tightly.
“I want to ravish you, Embyr,” he utters, his heated breath ghosting across my collarbone. I wrap my arms around his neck and hold tight, lifting my legs around his torso. Casen’s grip on my ass holds me up and he walks me over to my dining room table, setting me on the edge.
“Do it, Casen. Ravish me,” I beg, my legs shaking with desire.
“I want to.” He lets out a long, anguished sigh. “But, I can’t.”
I pull back, dejected, and he must see it in my eyes because he quickly recovers. “Oh, baby. I want to so bad. I just…” Dropping his hands he turns and pulls them down over his face in frustration. “Reece is waiting for us outside, and he threatened to bang down the door if I took too long. But, then you go and put this on…” He stops, admiring my crimson spaghetti strap dress. It floats down to mid-thigh and I know that I can’t bend over in it unless I want to give everyone a show. “I just want to stay here and fuck you all night.”
I laugh, and slide down off of the table. “Okay, then. Let’s go, but know I expect a full ravishing when we get back.”
Casen playfully slaps me on the ass as I walk past him and to the door. “You can bet your sweet ass you’ll get one.”
*****
The party is in full swing by the time Reece, Trinity, Casen and I arrive. The music is on but it’s not so loud that you can’t hear anyone when they talk. The lights are dim. People line every wall space and more filter out onto the large deck overlooking Lake Michigan. The view is breathtaking, from what I can see, and I make a mental note to check it out before the party is over.
Walking in on the arm of Casen Parker is surreal. I spent many nights in high school wishing that one day I could be in this exact position. I wanted to be the envy of every girl I’d known since elementary school and just like in my teenage daydreams, all eyes are on us as we enter. Like at the bar and every other time I’ve been out with Casen, all the women’s eyes seem to gravitate toward him. I don’t blame them, but now I am happy to be on the receiving end of their jealousy.
He leads me into the kitchen while Trinity and Reece go off on their own, and pours me a Captain and Coke. I smile and thank him, taking it from his hands. It’s strong, and the burn of the liquor against my throat starts to calm my ramped nerves. I like that he knows what I prefer to drink.
“Casen!” a deep voice calls. We both turn and are greeted by a man just few inches shorter than Casen, but no less intimidating. His muscles rival Casen’s and I watch them flex as he extends his hand to the guy next to me. “What’s up, man? I haven’t seen you in a while.”
Casen takes his hand, smiling wide. “I’m good, Aaron. How have you been?”
Aaron nods, his dark chocolate irises shine with happiness. “I’m great! The wife just found out she is pregnant.”
Casen pulls him in for a man hug. “Congrats, man! That’s great.”
“Thank you.” He nods, and then looks at me as though he just realized I’m not here for decoration. “And, who is this?”
Before I can answer, Casen’s large hand wraps around my side, pulling me to him, and kisses me on the temple. “Aaron, meet Embyr Quinn—my girlfriend.”
Aaron’s brows rise in shock as he takes us in. I’m sure mine matches his. This is the first time Casen has introduced me as his girlfriend and I’m not sure it hit me until just this moment how truly scary that is.
A lot of things flash through my mind. I’m his girlfriend. That means I will be introduced into every aspect of his life: his job, his friends, his quirks, and his family. Dread fills me as I realize he will be doing the same. Before, when I thought I was going to break his heart and leave him, there was no chance in him getting to know the real Embyr. I could portray whatever I wanted. Tell him whatever I wanted him to hear, but now, I can’t help but get completely wrecked at the thought of him learning about my life. What if things work out between the two of us? I’m either going to have to tell him the truth or I am going to have to stick with one good lie for the remainder of our relationship—possibly—for the rest of my life.
“Nice to meet you, Embyr,” Aaron interrupts my inner freak-out and reaches for my hand, but he doesn’t shake it. He brings it up to his mouth and places a kiss on it.
“You have your own woman, Aaron. Leave mine be,” Casen jokingly warns.
Aaron laughs. “I know not to mess with your girlfriend, Casen. Not only do I have a wife, but I like my balls firmly w
here they are.”
The two chat for a few more minutes. I stand patiently next to him, enjoying the circles he is gently drawing with his finger tips on my lower back. It’s making me edgy and downright horny. Everything he is doing is turning me on. The way he speaks and the way he won’t let me get more than six inches away from him. The way his muscles flex when he moves. When he wraps his arm around my shoulders and traps me to him, I bring mine around his waist, looking for some sort of purchase. I find it just underneath his shirt. I caress the side of his abs, feeling them tense up and the goose bumps prickling his skin. I’m lost in the feel of his touch on my collarbone and shoulder, and the ripple of his skin beneath my fingertips.
I’m so distracted that I don’t see Aaron walk away until I feel Casen’s hot breath on my ear. “I can tell your panties are fucking soaked right now, Embyr,” he speaks in a low and menacing voice. “I want to take you in the bathroom, bend you over the sink, and claim that wet pussy.”
An involuntary moan escapes my lips, and l turn, so I am eye to eye with him. “You wouldn’t even need foreplay, Casen. I’m so wet, that big cock would slip right in.”
He rears back slightly, a devious smile ghosting his lips, before he grabs my hand and tugs me toward the hallway. My nipples harden with anticipation and, since I’m not wearing a bra, I’m sure the entire party can see the outline. I don’t give a shit. I just want Casen’s tongue running along the taut peak.
He grabs the doorknob to, what I assume is, the bathroom. Finding it occupied, he eyes the hallway. “This way. Ian has a bathroom in his room. I want to be able to watch you come on my dick in the mirror.” He says it so loud that I don’t think he cares who hears, and I almost feel bad that I’m about to fuck my boyfriend in the birthday boy’s (who we have yet to see) bathroom. The knob turns and we enter the room. Just as we are about to close the door, someone calls Casen’s name.
It’s Ian.
“No fucking in my room,” he half jokes from the opposite end of the hallway.