by Amy Marie
My stomach coils with disgust as his eyes travel down my body. “What the hell do you want, Patrick?” I ask with false conviction, pulling myself together so I don’t show any fear.
His skin turns an angry shade of red. “What do I want?” He shakes his head and asks louder. “What do I want?”
The strong façade I’ve put on is cracking and if I don’t hold still in the face of this dangerous man, he will chew me up and spit me out. “That’s what I asked, isn’t it?”
He steps closer, his eyes are tired and fierce, and stress is written all over his face. “I want to know if you did it, Embyr?”
“Did what?” I ask, mustering some strength in my tone.
Another step closer. I feel like he is caging me in. I could run, but I’m afraid he would chase. I look to the left, the fire station so close, yet so far away. I’m almost backed against the wall by the time Patrick speaks again. “Were you moving my clients’ money?”
I stare him down. My fists clenching, ready for a fight, should this turn bad. “You did all of that yourself!” I spit my answer. “You fucked your clients’ over and now you’re just looking to find someone to blame. That account was made long before I even started working there.”
His eyes turn to slits. “How do you know that?”
I step forward, getting stronger by the second. I didn’t start that account. I didn’t screw over my clients. I just made it so other people finally noticed he was doing it. “I worked for you for a long time, Patrick. You may think I’m stupid, that all I was good for was a fuck and some coffee but I’m so much smarter than you think. Now, back the fuck off.”
Patrick’s face turns a shade of red I have never seen before and it puts me more on the defense. My knee is ready to rise up and connect with his balls, should he choose to make a physical move.
“You’re right about being smart, Embyr. But you’re wrong about one thing.” His eyes move down to my chest. “You weren’t a good lay at all.”
I lean in, getting as close to him as I can without turning my stomach. “Fuck. You.”
I can feel his breath all over my face as he retorts. “Been there. Fucked that. No thanks.”
I shove him as hard as I can with both hands and before Patrick can react I hear Casen yelling. We both turn our heads and watch as a murderous looking Casen storms toward us with Reece trailing behind him.
“Get your fucking hands off of her,” Casen roars from twenty feet away. I can see Reece cracking his knuckles. They are ready for a fight.
As they get closer and see Patrick, recognition flashes across their faces. I hear my old boss chuckling while taking a few steps back. “Casen Parker and Reece Craig? No fucking shit!”
Recognition is replaced by anger again. “Strickland,” Casen says. “Back away from my girlfriend.”
Patrick looks at me, and then at Casen. “Girlfriend, hmm?”
Casen towers over Patrick, they are chest to chest and I watch Reece take in the situation. “Yeah, my girlfriend, asshole. So, back the fuck off of her.”
Patrick raises his palms up and to the side, seemingly in defeat. “It’s all good, man. I was just speaking to my ex-employee.”
Reece chimes in, appearing next to Casen. “Conversation is over. Leave.”
Patrick continues to walk backwards but his eyes find mine and he says, “Do you pull her hair, Casen? Because she always loved when I pulled her hair while railing her from behind, over my desk.”
It happens so fast. Casen storms over to Patrick, fists clenched, and punches him so hard, Patrick immediately falls to the ground. He doesn’t get up. He just holds his hand to the bruise that is rapidly forming on his left cheek and stares at Casen.
“Come on, man,” Reece commands. Casen grabs my hand, and pulls me behind him until we get to the station. Reece gives Casen an unreadable look as we enter the door, leaving the two of us alone.
“Stop moving so much,” I softly tell Casen, gently wiping the blood off his knuckles. The knuckles he hit the brick wall, just inside the station, with.
He releases a deep breath and lowers his head. I finish cleaning his hand up inside the large bathroom and kiss the top of it. “Thank you,” he says.
I nod, sliding off the sink, and deposit the Band-Aid wrappers into the trash can. Casen pulls me by my hips into him and then lifts my chin. Looking distraught he asks. “Embyr, did you sleep with him?”
My heart starts to crack. This is the last thing I thought he would ever find out and it’s probably the least heartbreaking thing I need to tell him. I tip my chin down, answering his question truthfully and he drops his hands.
“We’re you two dating?” he asks. “Wait! He’s married. How long did it go on?”
Tears prick the sides of my eyes, threatening to spill down my cheeks. “I don’t know how long. It just happened. I have no other reasons for doing it besides I wasn’t thinking.”
Casen’s head falls back and he looks at the ceiling. Searching it as though it may hold all the answers. “Did you know he was stealing?”
I wasn’t expected that question but I’m too exhausted from all the lies to lie anymore. “I did.”
He finally looks down, his eyes meeting mine. He doesn’t say anything, so I decide to give him another truth. “I was the one who brought it to the attention of the police.”
His scowl lightens with those words. I feel as though for a brief moment, Casen thought I was allowing it to happen under my nose. Even though I was, it was to make sure he was caught and all that money would eventually end up back in the arms of its owner.
“I feel sick, knowing he has touched you, baby,” he whispers. “That you let him do that, knowing he is married.”
I allow tears to fall down my cheeks. “I can’t explain why I did it, Casen. All I can say is that is in the past, and a lot has changed. I’ve changed over the last month. You have to forgive me,” I beg.
He nods a couple of times, seemingly coming to terms with the slap in the face he just received. “Okay.” He walks over and kisses me on the nose. “I don’t like that he has fucked you, but I’m glad you did the right thing, Embyr, and tomorrow, when I get home, I’m going to fuck you so fucking good, any past lovers—that asshole included—will be long forgotten.”
I wrap my arms around him. “You forgive me?”
He places his cheek on top of my head. “There is nothing to forgive. All that was before you met me. The past is in the past, right?”
*****
Casen and I sit on the couch in the common room of the fire department, watching mindless television. I don’t want to leave just yet. The whole interaction with Patrick has shaken me. Soon, I’ll have to head back before he has to go wash the truck. I must have fallen asleep because the next thing I know, my eyes are slowly peeling open and my ears perk up to the whispers of Casen and Reece.
“You can’t just let that go, Casen,” Reece speaks soft but harshly.
Casen shifts underneath my head lying in his lap. “Back off about it, man. It’s not your concern.”
I hear Reece huff. “It is my concern. You’re my best friend.”
“No,” Casen tells him, dragging a hand across my neck. “I’m not a child. There is no reason for you to worry.”
A chair shifts across the floor and Reece’s voice gets closer but quieter. “What about what Ian said? What about how all that shit happened to Patrick, Thad, and Evan. Now Wesley. We all need to be watching our back.”
“So, you think someone is out to get our group from high school?” Casen scoffs at the question.
“I don’t know, man,” Reece answers. “Seems that way.”
“That kind of thinking is insane,” Casen says. “It’s a coincidence. They all were doing shit they needed to get caught for, and if someone is coming to get all of us, I’m not doing anything that I should be ashamed of. You all were the assholes in high school, not me.”
“Then why did you get that tattoo?” Reece asks.
&n
bsp; It’s quiet for a moment before Casen responds. “So it would remind me not to stand and watch something happen when I can do something about it, Reece. You know that.”
Reece’s voice comes from above us now, he must have stood up. “I’m just saying it’s weird is all, Casen. First those guys and now Ian can’t find Annie anywhere? You don’t think that is strange?”
I’m trying to control my breathing so I don’t bring attention to the fact that I’m awake and about to have a panic attack. I can feel my pulse quickening.
“I do,” Casen continues, while I take long breaths. “But, I’m not doing shitty things with my life now, and neither are you. There isn’t anything that I’m not happy to admit to anyone. Embyr included. He can look for Annie all he wants, but what I want is right here. I’m not scared of something that seems like a coincidence.”
I can’t manage the attack any longer. The guys continue to fight, but I don’t care. I start to whimper and jump straight up, releasing myself from Casen’s arms, and run to the bathroom, splashing cold water on my face. My fingers wrap around the edge of the sink and a soft knock at the door startles me.
“Come in.”
Casen walks in with a look of concern. “You okay, baby?”
I lower my chin to my chest. “Yes. I was having a nightmare,” I lie. How else am I going to explain that I’m freaked out over the walls caving in on my lies?
He pulls me away from the sink and into his chest, surrounding me with his comfort. My shoulders shake as I start to cry, but he doesn’t comment on the tears falling onto his shirt. After long minutes and I’ve calmed down a bit, Casen is called over his radio to the back of the station, so they can start washing the truck. He walks me out to the exit and thanks me for the surprise visit. I feel guilty, but I don’t focus on that for too long as his hands secure my jaw and his lips find mine. I’m lost in the feel of our mouths sealed together. Nothing else in the world matters as long as I have Casen by my side, and with that thought, everything crashes down on me again. I start to cry and he pulls back.
“Don’t cry, baby.” He kisses my cheek. “Everything is fine.”
My hands reach up, securing my fingers to his wrists. “I know. I know. I just feel that, at any moment, the ball could drop and all this will go away. I don’t want to lose you.”
Casen kisses my nose, tightening his grip on my jaw. “Embyr,” he starts and I look away because I can’t bear to stare directly in his eyes.
“Embyr, look at me,” he commands, and I do. I want to wipe the tears from my face but his thumbs beat me to it. “You’re not going to lose me. There is nothing you can say or do to make me not want to have you every day, do you understand?”
I look down again. He can’t possibly know that. I could tell him now. Tell him I’m Annie. Tell him I was the one who brought all the indiscretions to light for his high school buddies. Tell him I was going to make him fall for me and crush his heart. Tell him I felt the same way about him ten years ago. I could tell him. “You won’t lose me, Embyr. I’ve fallen so hard for you. I’ve never felt this way and I know for a fact that I am in love with you,” he admits, keeping me from releasing all of my lies and speaking the truth.
By the time I get outside, the guys have the truck out and all the things needed for its bath. I’m still on a fucking high since telling Embyr I love her, but in the back of my mind I’m kind of fucked up in the head over her having sex with her married boss. Her married boss that I went to high school with. Her married boss whom I despise. Her married boss who is a criminal in more ways than the world knows.
Reece is emptying out the back of the truck to reorganize everything when I find him. He eyes me sideways but doesn’t say anything. Our intense conversation is probably still floating around in that head of his. Ever since I’ve known him, Reece has been suspicious of everyone and everything. I can’t disagree that it’s odd all this shit went down with our high school friends around the same. I find it more of a coincidence than a conspiracy. Then, to bring up Annie’s name along with it? That is out of line. That girl was the sweetest in high school. When Annie finally showed up on my radar, it was like I couldn’t see anyone else. She was kind and had a great circle of friends. That tape ruined everything for her. No one will admit to who the culprit was but I have a pretty good idea.
“I heard what you said to her,” Reece says, grabbing one of the sponges and starts cleaning the side of the truck.
I pick up one of the scrub brushes and start working on tires. “What did I say to her?”
“That you love her.”
I stop, stand up, and straighten my back. Our eyes meet, but his look is unreadable. I don’t know if he is happy for me or not. I’m guessing not. “And?” I ask, feeling my jaw tick.
“And,” he starts, “Don’t you think it’s too soon for that?”
I drop the brush into the bucket, setting my hands on my hips. “Maybe for someone like you,” I state.
He narrows his eyes at me. “What is that supposed to mean, Casen?”
I throw my hands up. “It means that you don’t know what that feels like.” When he doesn’t respond, I continue. “Love. It may seem like it’s too soon for you, but I’ve been in love before. I know what it feels like and, for some crazy reason, even after the short time I have been with Embyr, I know my feelings for her are strong.”
“Strong, yes,” he agrees. “But, love?”
I step up to him, feeling the throbbing in my hand from punching Patrick go from dull to painful with my rising blood pressure. I would never hit Reece. Not unless he gave me a reason to. “I am done talking to you about this . . . about her. I didn’t even start this conversation. Leave my love life out of your mouth unless you are going to congratulate me on finding an amazing girl.”
He stares me down and then squeezes the trigger, spraying the truck again. We work side by side for the next hour and, by the time we’re done, our beautiful red engine shines. I smile. I take pride in my work, even if it’s to get all the shit off of our vehicle. We all head in to start getting ready for dinner. Even though the temperature has dropped over the past couple of days, that doesn’t deter us from grilling some chicken outside. We always try to eat healthy and the captain requires us to work out every day. Weights and cardio are a must. While the chicken grills, I stay inside and steam some vegetables and make a salad. Living in a fire house up to four days a week has made me a better cook. We all contribute to the food. It’s a system that seems to work for us.
I hear someone walk in but I don’t look up as I chop the cucumbers.
“I get it,” Reece’s voice echoes in the kitchen. I glance over and watch him grab paper plates and plastic ware. We may have to cook our own food, but none of us want to do the dishes.
“Get what?”
He leans on the counter next to me, watching as I drop the vegetables into the salad bowl. “You are sticking up for Embyr.” He takes a deep breath and crosses his arms over his chest. “I have been thinking about it and, even though I’m not in love with Trinity, I wouldn’t want you putting your nose into how I do feel about her.”
I raise a brow at him. “And, how is that?”
“I’ve been living the college frat boy life for so long, I didn’t think I would ever want to change that up and be in a committed relationship. I like her. She gets me.”
“Even without the sex she’s holding off on?” I ask, knowing he has never been shy to talk about his sex life.
“That’s the thing. It’s me. I’m holding off.”
That catches me off guard. “Why?”
“It’s just,” he starts, scrubbing his hands down his face. “I don’t want to fuck it up. Every time I sleep with a girl, I lose interest. I like Trinity too much to let that happen.”
“So, what?” I ask, starting in on the tomato. “You’re going to be celibate your whole relationship?”
“There is no relationship,” he sternly tells me.
I raise both b
rows this time. “If you like this girl, Reece, you need to snag her. She’s hot, smart, and witty. Nothing like any of the one-night stands I’ve seen you take home.”
“Thanks,” he mumbles.
“It’s true, fucker. Stop worrying about losing interest. If you’ve been seeing her for the past couple of weeks and are going back for more, then I can guarantee, once you sleep with her, you’re going to be more interested than you already are.”
“Yeah.”
I jab him with my elbow. “Take the advice from a relationship guy. Make her yours and fuck her senseless.”
He smiles, the first time since I got here this morning. “Sure.” He pushes off the counter, snatching up a few cucumbers from the bowl. “We’ll see.”
I hear him walking away. “If you fuck her senseless, then she won’t know what a douche you are.”
He laughs, and I feel a piece of cucumber hit the back of my head.
*****
It’s close to nine o’clock when we are done with dinner and clean up. Most of the guys are in the community room watching television when Ian walks in. He sees me first and immediately looks away.
Weird.
He finds Reece and motions for him to follow into the other room. My eyes are rooted to the doorway they just through. Fifteen minutes later, Reece walks back in without Ian. I throw a pillow his way after a full minute of not looking my way. “What was that about?” The pillow misses him, and he ignores my question.
“Reece, man!” I yell across the room. He looks at me, and I can tell whatever it is that Ian told him wasn’t good. “Do you want to tell me what that was about?”
He shrugs. “Nothing, man. He just invited me to play golf tomorrow.”
I let it go. I can tell he is lying but, if I know Reece at all, I know that eventually he is going to tell me.
*****
I’m sound asleep when the alarm sounds. The noise is so loud, it blocks out everything else. When I first started out, I fumbled around a lot to get ready and downstairs to the engine. Now, I’m a seasoned pro and can be ready before the alarm is done. I’m one of the first ones to the truck with Reece right behind me. We slip on our gear and hold tight as Troy, our driver, takes off. Sirens blaring, we barrel down the narrow Chicago streets to a car accident.