* * * *
Playing outside with the children had worn them out. And worn Louisa out as well.
She escorted the twins toward the house, keeping an eye on the very door Trevor had walked through not more than a half hour ago. He hadn’t returned, and her heart ached with worry. What could she have possibly done to anger him this time?
Both Adam and Amanda held her hand as they entered the house. Louisa listened carefully for Trevor’s voice, but the closer they strolled to the stairs and she couldn’t hear his baritone voice, the lower her hopes sank.
Mrs. Smythe bustled out from one of the rooms, smiling wide as her gaze moved from Louisa to the twins. “Oh, what a lovely picture you make standing together holding hands.” She stroked her palm across each of the two-year-olds head, making them giggle. “And you, Miss Louisa, I do believe you have found something you are good at.”
Chuckling, Louisa nodded. “Indeed, I have. I love caring for these children.”
“And it shows.” Mrs. Smythe winked, then turned to leave.
“Mrs. Smythe, could I have a moment with you after I put the children down for their nap?”
“Of course, my dear. I shall wait a half hour then come to the nursery.”
“I would very much appreciate it.” Louisa led the children up the stairs and toward their room, still on the lookout for Trevor—but not seeing him.
Once inside, she helped Amanda off with her dress. The little sweetheart kept yawning, her eyes drooping with fatigue.
“Miss Weesa?”
Louisa grinned at the way the girl said her name. “Yes, my dear.”
“You stay fur-evow?”
“For-ever?” Louisa pronounced slower for Amanda. “I certainly hope so. It is my wish, and I pray your father allows me to stay.”
She gave the darling girl a hug and tucked her into bed. When she turned to do the same for Adam, he’d fallen asleep on his bed—still clothed. Smiling, Louisa gently removed his shoes and covered him with a blanket before settling herself in the rocking chair between the two beds.
The smile remained on her face for a few minutes as she pondered how wonderful she’d felt since taking on this new responsibility. Indeed, she loved caring for the twins. Her memory hadn’t given her any more flashbacks, but she received the feeling that she hadn’t been married and had her own family. At least she hoped that was true. Nonetheless, she felt as if she had wanted children of her own, and being the twins’ nurse would certainly fill a void in her life.
The creaking of the floor outside the nursery door alerted Louisa of a visitor. The door cracked open and Mrs. Smythe peeked her head inside. Quietly, Louisa left the rocking chair and stepped outside the room, softly closing the door behind her.
“I thank you for meeting with me, Mrs. Smythe.” Louisa motioned to the next room—which was hers—before moving in that direction. “Shall we meet in here for a moment? I want our conversation to be private.”
“Of course, my dear.” The older woman nodded and followed.
As Louisa closed the door behind them, she took a deep breath for courage. What she was about to ask might not be right, but she just had to know.
She turned, faced the housekeeper, and smiled. “Something happened not too long ago with His Lordship, and left me quite confused.”
As she explained what happened with the children, the housekeeper’s happy expression changed. Gradually, worried lines appeared in the older woman’s forehead, around her eyes, and especially around her frown.
“So you can see,” Louisa continued, “why I’m worried I did—or said—something wrong.” She shook her head. “He looked so confused…and amazed at the same time when I pointed out the similarities between him and the twins. Then to leave like that without any explanation.” She heaved a breath. “You can probably imagine my worry since I have made so many mistakes since His Grace has taken me in.”
Mrs. Smythe’s frown deepened as she shook her head. “Oh, that poor man.”
“Please,” Louisa placed her hand on the other woman’s arm. “I must know—for my own state of mind.”
“I really should not say. His Lordship does not condone gossip.”
“This isn’t gossip, Mrs. Smythe…not if it is what you know, and not if it will affect my ability to care for those adorable children.”
The housekeeper released a pent-up sigh as she twisted her apron in her fingers. “Lady Kensington—the duke’s deceased wife—had been carrying on with another man before and especially after she married Lord Kensington.”
Louisa gasped and slapped her hand over her mouth. This she had not expected at all.
“Nobody knew for the longest time,” Mrs. Smythe continued, “until the current nursemaid had caught them. She was let go the next day, but not without saying something to His Lordship first.” She shook her head. “I don’t know what exactly happened, but later that day is when Lady Kensington was trampled by a horse and died. Something snapped inside the duke, and he was never the same after that. Before this, he had been the most attentive father any child would want to have, but after the death of his wife…he grew distant. Rarely did he visit the nursery to spend time with those children.”
Louisa couldn’t believe any of this…not that she thought the housekeeper had made up the story, but because Louisa couldn’t understand why any woman would not stay faithful to a man like Trevor. “Oh, this is such a dreadful, heart-wrenching story, Mrs. Smythe. Do you think he suspected the children were not his?”
“Indeed I do,” the housekeeper whispered.
“That would explain why he acted so surprised at what I said earlier.”
“Yes, that does make sense.” Mrs. Smythe smiled. “But you are correct, you know. Those adorable children look a lot like the duke. He has just not been able to see it due to the circumstances surrounding his wife infidelity.”
“I certainly understand that.” Louisa rubbed her forehead. “That poor man, indeed. My heart just breaks for what he had to endure.”
“As does mine.” Mrs. Smythe touched Louisa’s forearm. “Now please do not tell anyone of this. That is spreading gossip, which the master abhors.”
“I shall not say a word. I thank you for confiding in me.” Louisa smiled.
She sneaked back into the nursery and to the rocking chair without disturbing the children. Closing her eyes, she sighed heavily. Poor Trevor. How could any man be expected to tolerate such treatment from his wife? He must have been so confused. So heartbroken. So untrusting. She didn’t blame him if he never trusted another woman again.
A pain pierced her chest, and she gasped. Head throbbing with uncertainty, she sat up and looked toward the door. What if… Oh, dear heavens, what if he didn’t trust her? What if there was something in her past that could destroy her position here at the estate? Macgregor was certainly someone to be feared, but would he ever harm her now?
Taking deep breaths, she massaged her head, hoping to alleviate the pressure. No matter what happened after she gained her memory, she must be honest with Trevor. That was the only way she could keep him and the twins in her life.
But thinking it and doing it sounded impossible. What if she had not been an honest person in her past? Trevor would never forgive her.
* * * *
Trevor now walked with a bounce in his step. Happiness flourished in his chest as he headed for the nursery the next day. Spending time with the children was foremost on his mind. Seeing Louisa came in at a close second.
He didn’t know at what point he’d begun to have tender feelings for her, but each day, these feelings expanded, and although he still hesitated to think of the L word, he did care for her and couldn’t imagine what his life would be like without seeing her on a daily basis. She had opened his eyes to many things since that first day, and it surprised him even now as to how blind he’d been. How foolish. But no more. He now had the courage to become the man he’d always wanted to be.
Trusting.
Loving.
And understanding.
Reaching the nursery, he stopped and smoothed his palms down his waistcoat and adjusted his cravat before softly opening the door. Thankfully, the twins were awake. Louisa sat on the floor in back of Amanda as she brushed his daughter’s—how he loved thinking this now—hair. All three of them looked up at him, and all three smiled.
“Am I interrupting something?” he asked.
“Of course not, Your Grace. Do not be silly.” Louisa tied the ribbon in Amanda’s hair and stood. “You are very welcome to come in the nursery any time you please.”
“What I would like to do right now,” he said, bending and scooping up his children, “is to take my favorite people on a drive with me.”
At first, the expressions on Adam and Amanda’s face were of fright, but as soon as he settled them in each arm, they grinned and hugged him tight. Tears stung his eyes, but he blinked to keep them away. Now was not the time to become so emotional. In private was when he’d do this, but definitely not in front of Louisa or his children.
He looked at her and winked. “Does that sound pleasing to you?”
“You…you wish me to go riding with you?”
“Of course. You are the children’s nursemaid, are you not?”
She chuckled. “Yes, I am.”
“Then collect the wraps and I shall summon the carriage.”
He set the twins down and they scampered to find their wraps. Louisa stood still, her gaze didn’t waver as she looked upon him with a face glowing with happiness. Stepping closer, he dropped his eyes to her parted lips. More than anything he wanted to take her in his arms and kiss her. But since they were in front of the children, he didn’t dare show such affection toward a servant.
He cupped the side of her face, and she snuggled against his palm, closing her eyes. The peaceful expression on her face made her look like an angel. How could he resist something so beautiful? So tempting?
Plain and simple, he couldn’t.
He dropped his lips to hers, brushing them ever so softly across her mouth. A gasp sprang from her first, then ended with a moan as she wrapped her arms around his middle.
This kiss was as uplifting as their last had been, and he wanted to devour her fully. Fortunately, the giggles of his children stopped him from going any farther. He broke the kiss, but didn’t pull away. Instead he rested his forehead against her. Breathing in her rose scent, he was content to stay this way for a moment longer.
“What was that for?” she asked.
“For…for being so wonderful.”
She hiccupped a laugh. “No, Your Grace, you are the one who is wonderful.”
“Trevor—if you please.”
She smiled and sighed. “Trevor.”
He rubbed his cheek against hers before placing one last kiss on her mouth. “Now, perhaps I should leave so you can ready the children.” He stepped closer to the door. “I fear if I stay any longer I will be tempted to hold you longer.”
Louisa’s cheeks turned an adorable pink. “I shall have them ready very soon.”
“Splendid.” He winked, turned, and hurried out of the room.
He practically skipped down the stairs, whistling…something he hadn’t done in quite a long time. The servants stopped and looked at him with wide eyes and grins. Apparently they noticed his new attitude as well. He chuckled and loved the newfound emotion expanding inside his chest.
Finally, he would feel like he had his very own family.
Ten minutes later, they were all settled in the opened landau and heading toward their destination. Louisa sat across from him by Amanda, and Adam sat next to Trevor. Excitement beamed on the twins’ glowing faces. They pointed and laughed at the lovely landscape. It surprised him how much they knew, but when they started naming flowers, it shocked him even more. By the conversation between Louisa and the children, he concluded she had taught them. Her eyes danced with happiness as she helped them pronounce the flower’s names.
Green Park was first on Trevor’s agenda for this afternoon, mainly so his children could see the animals, pet them, and perhaps get a cup of fresh milk. As a youngster, his mother had taken him here. Never his father, though. Trevor’s sire was too busy sleeping off his nocturnal activities.
As Trevor walked through the park beside Louisa, each child held one of their hands. Not many people were out this afternoon, but the few who were gave Trevor judgmental stares—especially when noticing how closely he walked beside Louisa. Anger rose inside him and he wanted to tell them to mind their own business. Even Louisa fidgeted as if uncomfortable, but she said nothing. He didn’t want anything to ruin their outing, so he put his anger behind him and continued with their walk.
Louisa helped the children name each animal, then she asked Adam and Amanda what sound each animal made. It amazed him how intelligent the twins were which of course made him puff his chest, proud of his children’s accomplishments at such a young age.
After their walk through Green Park, he took them to Bond Street. The streets were much busier, but he brought them here because he wanted to purchase a gift for the children. As much as he wanted to get Louisa something special, he knew that wouldn’t be proper…and the gossip circles would stir to life with that tidbit.
The driver stopped the landau and opened the door for Trevor. Once he was out, he turned and helped the children down, then reached a hand for Louisa. As before, her cheeks reddened, and she shyly looked away, but allowed his assistance. Immediately, Adam grasped Trevor’s hand and Amanda the other. This time when they walked, Louisa walked a few steps behind. He really wanted her by his side, but knew it was best this way.
As they passed a shop window filled with pastries, Adam pulled away and stopped in front, pressing his nose to the glass. Trevor grinned. He recalled doing this very thing when he was a lad.
Amanda released his hand and stood by her brother, admiring the tarts in the window. “Papa?” she asked. “Peez, have one?”
“Of course, my dear.”
He glanced at Louisa to ask if she would like a pastry, but she wasn’t looking toward the window. Instead, she focused on something behind him. Instead of the shy smile he’d watched for the past little while, a suspicious frown tugged on her lips.
Just as he turned to see what bothered her, another person bumped into him, making him stumble. “Forgive me for not seeing—” he began to say, but the vagabond didn’t stop.
Louisa gasped and jumped in the stranger’s path. As the young lad skirted around to avoid her, Louisa’s hand slipped in the boy’s pocket quick as a flash. The vagabond pushed her shoulder, aiming his glare right at her, opened his mouth to speak…but then stopped. Wide eyes stared at Louisa for a few seconds, before the lad sprinted into a run.
Shock washed over Trevor as he witnessed the scene. Her movement was so quick—so precise—he wondered if he’d actually seen what he had.
Louisa stood still, staring at the object in her hand. Her face void of color.
“What in heaven’s name—” he snapped, but then noticed what she held out to him. My pocket watch? He dug inside his pocket—the same place he always kept his watch—but it wasn’t there. Words choked in his throat. The thief.
“Your Grace,” Louisa said in a shaky voice. “I could not allow him to steal from you.” She handed him the watch.
Still in shock, he shook his head. “How did you know he was stealing from me?”
“I…” She turned her head and stared at the direction the lad had run. “I saw him take your watch, and I knew I had to get it back.”
“But, Louisa,” Trevor stepped closer. “You took my watch right out of his pocket and he didn’t even notice.”
She blinked in bewilderment. “I know.”
“How…” Trevor shook his head. Her wide eyes and colorless face told him this had been a mystery to her as well.
“Well,” he said, expelling his breath, “shall we venture into the shop and get some pastries for our d
rive home?”
Nodding, she folded her shaking arms. “Yes. That is a splendid idea.” She hurried to the twins and held their hand.
Trevor opened the door for the three before entering the shop. His mind whirled with unanswered questions but more with the fear that he knew what the answers were all along. By Louisa’s quick actions as she retrieved his watch, Trevor now realized what her past had been. The realization left a bitter taste in his mouth that no pastry would be able to remove.
Chapter Thirteen
Richard Macgregor sat behind his desk and tallied—again—the totals for the week. Irritated by the figures on the columns before him, he growled and smacked his fist against the table. His income had depleted greatly since Louisa had left without a trace, and until he could find her and bring her back, his profits would continue to plummet.
None of the children who worked for him had been able to tell him what happened to her. The last thing they knew, she had gone into Mayfair to pickpocket a gent she’d been studying for a while…then never returned. Richard had checked the gaols from here to London, but she hadn’t been arrested. If he didn’t find her soon, Lord Blankenship would withdraw his offer to pay for Louisa’s more passionate talents.
Changing her into a prostitute would double Richard’s coffers…mayhap even triple them. Louisa had always been a lovely young girl, and as she reached her adult years, she became even lovelier. He had wanted to take her for his lover a few times, but business always came first, and having her remain a virgin would make him a lot of money.
From the outer room the door slammed, and scrambling footsteps rushed in Richard’s direction. He stood and moved away from his desk just as David rushed into the room. The lad—in his twelfth year—huffed and puffed as if out of breath.
“I…saw…her.”
Richard shook his head. “Let it out, boy. What are ye blubberin’ about?”
David took a deep breath and exhaled slowly. He moistened his lips. “I saw Louisa.”
Grasping David by the shoulders, Richard peered into the boy’s wide eyes. “Ye’d better not be lyin’ to me.”
The Sweetest Touch Page 15