“She knew my dad’s name was Owen. She insisted the baby be named after him.” Placing his hands on the small of his back, he stretched with a groan. “When Cary and I got our first glimpse of Rodie, the name seemed to fit. Besides, how can you beat the name Rodie Owen West for a little cowboy?”
Kade moved around Micah to stand beside Pansy. He placed his arm around her shoulder like they were friends or something. She thought about moving away, but it felt nice. She could always tell him off later.
“Let’s get on down the road. Millie and Clinton will be waiting for us.”
Micah reached for his wallet. “You’ll need money for groceries or something.”
Kade took Pansy’s hand and pulled her toward the hallway. “We don’t need your stinkin’ money.” With a wave, he trotted down the hall, dragging her behind him.
After a short stop at the Burns Grocery, the ride back to the ranch passed mostly in silence. Clinton’s truck was parked in front of the porch, and they could see Willa on her horse in the corral. Millie watched from the fence while Clinton helped the girl.
Pansy climbed out of the truck and leaned against the fender. The scene reminded her of her childhood, if you ignored the fact that, unlike her father, Clinton was patient and easy going. What would it be like to learn something without your dad yelling at you? That was something she’d never know.
Kade slumped against the truck beside her, his smile even bigger if that was possible. “It’s almost dinner time. I’m going to go wrangle that little cowgirl. You get the grub ready.” His deep voice sent shivers down her spine.
“There you go, slipping back into vintage western movie dialogue. This is the twenty-first century, you know.” She slipped her traitorous fingers into the pockets of her jeans before they could grasp the front of Kade’s shirt and pull him into her arms.
“If I remember right, you don’t like cussing. This way I don’t cuss.”
“You don’t cuss anymore? Because I remember you swore like a sailor.” Pansy felt her shoulders relaxing as she chatted with Kade. “You knew so many bad words the Journalism professor gave you an A on your poem.”
“That class was hard.”
“You thought it would be easy. I’d hoped I’d finally found something I was better at than you.” She walked to the porch steps and went up halfway. “Then the teacher gave you an A for originality.”
If Kade was trying to look shocked and insulted, he failed. The laughter in his eyes gave him away. “Not true. And I didn’t say I didn’t cuss anymore. I’m trying to not cuss around you.”
His charm was in full bloom, and, like an idiot, Pansy realized she was falling into his trap. He’d always had a way of getting her to relax. And she’d let her guard down. “You don’t need to do anything for me. Just take care of Willa.”
Kade’s smile faded. He stared into her eyes for a moment then shrugged and walked toward the barn.
Why did life have to be so hard? Why couldn’t Kade have loved her enough to stay with her back then? Why couldn’t their baby have lived? Why…
Enough of the wallowing! The past couple of years, she’d come to terms with losing Maxie. She’d managed to get rid of all the hassle, until the cowboy waltzed into her life again. Time to get back to her original plan.
Filling her arms with groceries, she made several trips to get the food into the house. A note taped to the refrigerator mentioned three casseroles in the freezer and a fresh cherry pie in the pantry. Pansy was a master of BBQ and all things meat, but Cary was an angel with pastries of any kind. Her pies were legendary.
“After the day we’ve had, we need fresh food.” She unwrapped the chicken breasts they’d bought and set about making one of her favorites. She was sliding the roaster into the oven when Kade and little Willa entered the kitchen followed by Millie.
“Where’s Clinton?” Pansy pulled a bag of fresh green beans from the fridge and started snapping the ends off. The smell of bacon bits popping and frying made her mouth water. “I’ll have dinner ready in a little bit.”
“Oh, honey. He’s feeding the livestock then we have to be going.” Millie scooped the bacon onto a paper towel to drain. “Are you sure you don’t need us to bring you anything?”
Pansy dumped the bean ends into the trash. She pulled the small steamer from one of the lower cabinets and filled it with water. “No, we picked up groceries today on the way home. Thanks anyway.”
Millie turned to Kade. “Did Clinton tell you what needs to be done around here while Micah’s gone?”
“Yeah, we got it all worked out. He’s taking care of the ranch, and I’m doing the chores here at home, and watching out for Miss Willa Wild.” Kade grinned at the little girl.
Her high-pitched giggle filled the room as she snitched a bit of bacon.
What had started out this morning as a cute bun on the top of Willa’s head had slipped to just above her right ear. Curly red tendrils that had escaped the rainbow colored Scrunchie framed her elfin face.
As Millie talked, she pulled out the band and redid the little girl’s hairdo. “That’s better. Give Aunt Millie a hug good-bye.”
Kade and Willa walked the older woman out.
Before Pansy had the cheese grated, Kade reappeared. “How long until we eat?”
“Thirty minutes.” Pansy dropped the beans into the steamer, adding the bacon bits and a few spices. “Where’s Willa?”
“Saying good-bye to Clinton. She’ll be in in a minute.” Kade looked into the pot then fished out a piece of bacon with a fork. “Neither Millie or Clinton have kids of their own. They make the perfect grandparents for a little girl who needs some.”
They would have been perfect for Pansy’s daughter if she’d lived, too. She shook off the depressing thought. Living with What ifs just made her crazy. “Do you want a beer while we wait?” Pansy opened the refrigerator and pulled out two bottles of Coors Original. “I haven’t had one of these in years.”
“You used to drink them with me.” Kade waggled his eyebrows
Keeping the past in the past was hard with Kade here reminding her how good life had been for a while. “A lot of things changed when you left, including my choice of drinks.”
CHAPTER SIX
One thing about this new Pansy, the woman was a hell of a cook.
In the years they’d dated, she’d made some quick meals, but never ventured out of casseroles and sandwiches. Last night’s dinner, chicken breasts stuffed with cheese, baked potatoes and fresh beans, was one of Kade’s new, all-time favorite meal. Make that his all-time favorite dinner, because the cranberry pancakes topped with whipped cream that she’d made this morning was his new favorite breakfast. If she kept this up, he’d weigh as much as the bulls he rode.
“Willa wants to learn to barrel race, and I was telling her you were one of the best college barrel racers in Montana. Want to help?” Kade wondered if she still rode. The whole time he’d known her, a day hadn’t gone by that she hadn’t been with her horses.
“I haven’t been on a horse in years.” Pansy suddenly became interested in loading the dishwasher. “And I have things to do in here.”
Willa dragged a chair toward the sink, the legs screeching across the hardwood. “I’ll help clean the dishes, and then you can come with us.” She climbed on the chair and held out her hands. “I’ll put the glasses in the cupboard.”
Pansy looked at Kade, apprehension in her eyes. “I gave up everything to do with rodeo when I left home. I see no reason to start up again.”
“You have to come see my new horse.” Willa waited, one arm outstretched. “Hand me a glass, please.”
The moment Pansy gave up and agreed to come with them, Kade relaxed a little. It was obvious she didn’t want to ride, but she wouldn’t hurt Willa’s feelings for the world. One of these days, he’d get her to tell him the truth of her past, but until then, he’d be patient. “I’ll get started saddling.”
Kade grabbed a rope halter off the hook by the pe
n and slipped it on Rondo. Of all the horses on the Circle W, the black gelding was his favorite. As he brushed the sleek animal, questions ran through his mind. Could it be Pansy really didn’t want to ride? That was so unlike her, he wondered if something else was going on.
Before, Pansy had lived for her horses. How could her love of them change so completely?
He heard Willa Wild long before the girls got to the barn. In her high-pitched voice, she was explaining to Pansy about her new horse.
“I used to have a pony, but I got too big. We sent him to a little kid. Two Bits is just my size, and he’s the smartest horse on the ranch. Clinton says so.” The tiny redhead skipped into the barn aisle, pulling on Pansy’s hand. Her voice raised by two octaves when she saw Kade. “You didn’t catch Two Bits for me, did you? I can do it myself.”
Kade was pretty sure there was nothing in this world Willa Wild couldn’t do if she set her mind to it. “No, he’s in his pen. Your halter is over there.” He pointed to the bright pink bundle on the bench by the tack room.
Willa grabbed the halter and, with the lead rope dragging along behind her kicking up little puffs of dust, she ran toward the pen outside.
“Is she okay by herself with the horse?” Pansy started to follow the girl.
“She could probably use some help buckling the halter.” He looked up to meet her eyes. For a moment, he thought he saw the private, loving look she’d used to give him, but it disappeared quickly. He cleared his throat. “She usually just throws the lead rope over Two Bits’ neck, and he follows her.”
Pansy turned away, but not before Kade saw a genuine smile. He’d missed that smile, so he tried again. “I think she’s right. Two Bits is the bestest horse ever born.”
It worked. A wide grin spread across Pansy’s face at Kade’s imitation of Willa. Her grin grew wider as she watched the girl lead in a small brown horse.
“Isn’t he pretty?” As Willa reached up, Two Bits lowered his head to the girl’s level. She traced the small white spot on his forehead.
In the world of show horses, Two Bit’s legs were a little too short and his head was a lot too big, but here looks weren’t everything . . . or anything, really. “The prettiest,” Pansy said as she fastened the halter.
“Brush him and I’ll get your saddle.” Kade swung his saddle onto Rondo’s back and reached under the animal to snag the cinch.
Willa turned toward him, her hands on her hips, a frown on her face. “You know I don’t ride with a saddle. I’m an Indian Princess.”
Kade couldn’t stop the laugh that bubbled out of his chest. “Okay, Indian Princess. I thought we’d have Pansy teach you how to barrel race today, but if you want to ride bareback, we’ll just go ride down by the creek.” He grabbed a halter, disappeared into the corner stall then led out a pretty roan.
“Wait!” Willa Wild drew the short word out into three long syllables. She turned to Pansy, throwing out her arms. “You can teach me to run barrels?”
~*~
Pansy stiffened. “I haven’t done that in years, honey. I won’t be a very good teacher.”
Kade knew barrel racing had been Pansy’s passion since she’d been big enough to hold the reins by herself. She’d poured every waking minute into learning to be the best. Something had changed, and it wasn’t for the better.
She turned to him. “You’d better find someone else.”
“Please, please, please.” Willa stood in front of Pansy, jumping up and down, her cheeks flushed. “I want to be a barrel racer just like Sherry Cervi.”
“She’s only going to walk around the barrels.” Kade watched the conflicting emotions playing out across Pansy’s face.
“This is my lifelong dream.” The look on the eight-year-old’s face was priceless along side her words.
“Lifelong?” Kade couldn’t help but ask.
The serious blue eyes glared at him. “Yes. Since I was six.” Willa Wild turned back to Pansy. “Pretty please, Pansy.”
Pansy would be a tougher person than he was if she could say no to this little girl. Micah’s warning in the hospital had been dead on. In a few years, Willa Wild was going to run some poor guy ragged.
“Okay,” Pansy said with a sigh. “Just for today.”
Kade got the tiny saddle from the tack room then straightened the blanket Willa Wild had somehow thrown across Two Bits’ back. He snugged the cinch and tried to lift the little girl onto her horse. “Go warm up Two Bits.”
“I need my horse’s boots first. We can’t have him hurting his legs. All the good barrel racers use boots.” Willa Wild slid down and hurried into the tack room. She came back with a set of four turquoise boots. “I can put them on by myself.”
Kade suspected the boots weren’t technically on right, but he wasn’t an expert. If one ended up on each leg, that would be good enough for today.
“Where’s your bridle?” Pansy asked, starting toward the tack room.
“Two Bits is so well trained, I ride him in a halter.”
Kade saddled the roan, watching Pansy interact with Willa. They stood, heads together, combing the tangles out of Two Bits’ mane. Pansy looked at him and his heart gave a weird thump. The two made a pretty picture, but he noticed the tension in Pansy’s body despite her smile.
“Is that true? About the halter?” she asked.
Kade adjusted the stirrups on the roan’s saddle. “Yup. Two Bits is the best trained horse in Oregon.”
Pansy moved back to Willa Wild. “Need a boost?”
Exasperation filled the little girl’s expression. “Pansy, I can do this myself. Tell her, Kade.” She led Two Bits to the fence. The horse dropped his head and cocked a hip, waiting while his rider climbed the rails and jumped onto his back. “Aren’t you ready yet?”
Kade slipped a bridle on the roan gelding before dropping the reins into Pansy’s hand. “Ready?” He slid the snaffle bit into Rondo’s mouth and followed Willa toward the door.
“Wait! I didn’t say I was going to ride.” Pansy jogged after them. She stuffed the reins toward Kade.
Turning his back on her, he put his foot into the stirrup and mounted. As he rode away, he looked back over his shoulder. “Just lead Smog around then. He needs the exercise. Come on, Willa Wild. Let’s ride.”
Willa kicked her horse into a slow jog, her wild, curly-red hair dancing around her face. “Look at me!” Her joyful, little-girl voice rang across the arena.
How could anyone be in a bad mood around this child? She radiated happiness. He turned to share the moment with Pansy, just to see her standing where he’d left her, looking at Smog.
She reached out a tentative hand and stroked the gelding’s nose then wrapped her arms around his neck and buried her face in his shiny, black mane. Her love for horses had apparently overcome whatever misgivings she had about riding. She looked up to see Kade watching her and gave him a sad smile. “Nice horse.”
Kade pretended to ignore her melancholy. “Micah bought him for Cary to learn to barrel race on just before she became pregnant. Climb aboard.”
Pansy mounted with the grace of someone who’d ridden most of her life. She turned to Kade. “I’ll just sit on him.”
~*~
Swinging a leg over a horse for the first time in seven years felt like coming home. The things Pansy had missed most, besides Kade, were her horses, but when she’d left home, she’d put all things rodeo from her mind. It was just too painful to dwell on what she’d lost.
When her father had given her the choice of an abortion or leaving, she’d damn near knocked him over on the way out. She’d spent months agonizing, but no matter how she looked at it, she hadn’t been able to figure out a way to support her horses on her own.
The only good point she could remember about her dad was that he loved animals and his God above all else—people, not so much, and his wayward daughter, apparently, not at all.
When she touched her heels to his sides, Smog moved out smoothly. He responded to her cues wit
hout hesitation. She felt a small smile form on her lips. She hadn’t forgotten at all how much she enjoyed riding. To keep from going crazy those first terrible years after Kade left, she’d hidden all desire to rodeo from herself by becoming a city girl.
“This is a nice horse.” She rode over to where Kade was watching them. “But his name has to go. Who came up with Smog?”
“I know this will come as a surprise, but Willa named him, and Cary didn’t have the heart to tell her no.” He eased Rondo into a lope and warmed the horse up.
Pansy reached down and checked the knot where Willa’s lead rope was tied to the halter. “Are you sure you don’t need a bridle?” she asked the little girl.
“Two Bits doesn’t like a bridle very well. We like this better.”
“Woohoo, Willa Wild! Bet I can outrun you and Two Bits.” Kade loped his horse up to them and stopped. “Let’s have a race. Time us, Pansy.”
“I don’t have a stop watch.”
Willa looked from her to Kade and shook her head. Apparently, that was a dumb thing to say, but Willa was too polite to call her on it. “You just count. You know, one, two, three until we finish.”
“I get to go first.” Kade sent a friendly challenge to his small opponent.
“No, I do.” Willa practically vibrated with excitement.
Kade put his fingertips to his forehead. “How do we decide? I know.” He pointed to the girl. “Pick a number between one and ten. Highest number wins.”
Willa leaned forward and wrapped her arms around her horse’s neck as far as they’d go while she thought. She sat up with a smile. “Two for two bits.”
Kade’s shoulders fell in mock disappointment. “You win. My number was one.”
Watching the interaction between the two, Pansy realized he really enjoyed this little girl. His pleasure wasn’t an act, and it was obvious Willa adored Kade.
Her breathing hitched, and she swallowed hard. He would have made a great daddy. She struggled to contain the tears that were threatening to spill. Pretending to check Smog’s cinch, she turned away from the other two. If Kade hadn’t wanted to be a bull rider more than he’d wanted her, and if Maxie had lived, this could be her family. If, if, if…
Sweet Cowboy Kisses (Sugar Coated Cowboys Book 2) Page 7