Coup De Grâce

by Lani Lynn Vale

  I knew the next thing out of her mouth before she even said it.

  “And what made you not want to be a doctor anymore? Seems like a lot of schooling on your part for you to just give it up,” she whispered, laying her head against my chest and looping her arms around my waist.

  I held my breath, and tried to hold the pain in, yet it didn’t want to be held anymore.

  “I witnessed an abortion that changed the course of my life and also ruined me for the medical field,” I said woodenly. “If someone could just kill an unborn child in that way, one that had fingers and toes, and clearly defined features, then how could they say they were an upholder for human life? Wasn’t what they were doing the exact opposite?”

  “Oh, Michael,” Nikki breathed. “Do you want to tell me about it?”

  I knew Nikki was catholic.

  She went to church religiously every Sunday.

  In fact, as a way to get closer to her, I’d started going to conversion classes, and attending Sunday mass at the very church that she went to just so I could breach some of the gap between her and me.

  The fact that abortion would never be uttered from her lips really held great appeal to me.

  Because abortion had been a determining factor in how I’d live my life from the moment I turned twenty three.

  Even now, twelve years later, I can still remember what that baby looked like.

  I looked at it every day in the mirror.

  “It’s gory. And not a good story,” I warned her.

  She pressed further into my arms, and said what I needed to hear. “Tell me.”

  So I did.

  “I was asked if I wanted to, and since I’d never witnessed one before, I thought ‘sure, why not.’ Well, the why not became a ‘what the hell have I done’ pretty fuckin’ quickly. I’d heard about abortions during one of the many lectures. Knew the basics of it. So I go in there, and there’s this woman already on the table with her legs high and wide in the air.” I cleared my throat. “She was asleep, and it was then I realized that the baby they were doing the abortion on was a viable fetus, but the mother just didn’t want her.”

  “I watched as they hooked the vacuum up, maneuvered the small hose up her vagina, and started to suck away.” I coughed. “Instantly, there was blood, and that’s about when I turned around and refused to watch anymore. I’d just witnessed a child murdered right in front of my eyes.”

  “God,” she breathed, a sob catching in her throat.

  “That was the first tattoo I got,” I said, grabbing her hand with my own and moving it to rest over my heart. “That’s when I met Peek.”

  She moved away, placing distance that I didn’t want between us, between us, and held out her hand. “Show me your Peek.”

  And that’s what I did.

  Hopping off the truck’s tailgate, I made my way inside, hand in hand, with Nikki.

  The first person to greet us at the front counter was Alison, the woman that’d been working the front desk for as long as I could remember.

  She was also Peek’s old lady.

  Peek was a member of an unofficial motorcycle club, and one of the grumpiest men in the entire world.

  Yet, he respected a man who could speak his language. And Peek’s language was the art of tattoos, and I had a lot of tattoos.

  “Mikey!” Alison said happily. “You ready to get that blank spot on your back filled in?”

  Before I could answer, Nikki spoke up.

  “Actually, he’s bringing me here to get my first tattoo!” Nikki said excitedly, as if we’d actually planned for that to happen.

  When I went to say something, she placed her hand over my mouth and shook her head.

  “Really? Mikey’s never brought anyone here before! I’m so excited to meet you! You’re Nikki, right?” Alison asked with a happy laugh.

  Nikki turned curious eyes to me before returning her attention to Alison.

  “Yeah, I’m Nikki. I hope you’ve heard good things,” she said honestly.

  I knew I should stop this before it went any further, but I decided to let it be. What was said was said, and I didn’t have anything to hide.

  Nikki would find out soon enough what I’d done even without Alison’s help.

  Alison smiled. “Oh yeah. Michael told us all about you when Peek was doing the piece on his back.”

  Nikki blinked and turned to me, but Alison didn’t notice. She was too busy going on and on about all that I’d said that night a year and a half ago.

  The night I’d been drunk out of my mind.

  “What’d you do?” She asked warily.

  I shrugged and turned around, giving her my back.

  “Right above my belt,” I told her.

  Slowly I felt my shirt lifted, and then she gasped.

  I knew what she saw.

  It was kind of hard to miss.

  “You have my name tattooed on your ass!” She squealed.

  I snorted and turned around, giving her a dry look.

  “It’s on my waist, not my ass. I don’t have anything on my ass. I can always get one if you want,” I offered suggestively.

  She wiggled her fingers at me.

  “Turn back around,” she said. “I wasn’t done looking.”

  I did as I was told, and felt her tracing the letters of her name that was inked into my flesh with her fingers.

  “Why?” She asked softly.

  I shrugged.

  “Seemed like a good idea at the time,” I said lamely.

  She laughed, making my heart soar.

  “I’ve heard of women putting their man’s name right there, so he can, ya know, see it when he does her from, ya know, behind. But I’ve never seen a man do it,” she tittered.

  I let my shirt drop and turned back around to see her eyes now fixated on my crotch, and I barely resisted the urge to cover it with my hand.

  “So,” I said teasingly. “What are you getting on that virgin skin of yours, Nik?”

  We’d talked about it once, a lifetime ago, but times changed. As did opinions.

  Nikki, though, was predictable, proving to me she hadn’t changed a bit.

  “Have you seen those huge eyed stuffed animal Ty Beanie Babies?” She asked Alison.

  Alison nodded. “Yeah, who hasn’t?”

  Nikki smiled.

  “That’s what I want.”

  I shook my head.

  That woman.

  On our first date together, I’d won her one from one of those machines where you used the claw to grab the stuffed animal out of the overpriced machine.

  She’d fallen in love with it, and I’d started calling her ‘Owl’ later that night as I saw the resemblance between the owl’s eyes and Nikki’s.

  When she’d joked that she was going to get a tattoo of the owl, I’d called her on it, and we’d made a bet that she wouldn’t.

  But then, as time went on, we’d forgotten about it.

  Then things had gone down, and suddenly there was no more Nikki and Michael.

  Well, I’d forgotten about it.

  Nikki, apparently, had not.

  “Do you have a specific one you had in mind?” Alison asked.

  Nikki smiled and dug into her bottomless pit of a purse for her phone, unearthing it after emptying not only her wallet, keys, and a makeup bag, but also a pair of flip flops, onto the counter.

  I could do nothing but shake my head.

  “That woman.”

  “Oh!” Alison said excitedly. “I love it!”

  Alison was a forty four year old woman with graying blonde hair, but right then, with the way she was giggling like a teenage girl, she could’ve passed for one of the young girls that Peek had just shown out the door.

  “What are you squealin’ about, woman? You know how that hurts me ears,” Peek growled teasingly.

  Peek was fourth generation Irish.

  He had a thick accent, but w
hen he was talking to his wife, the accent got thicker and thicker as he crooned his sweet words to her. Or yelled at her.

  “How ye doin’, boyo?” Peek asked slapping me on the shoulder with his large hand.

  Peek was a six foot four inch powerhouse that towered over my six foot two frame.

  I wasn’t skinny by any means.

  I had muscle on top of muscle.

  Peek, on the other hand, was a bull where the rest of us were most definitely not.

  He was a volunteer firefighter for the Uncertain, Texas Fire Department as needed, and he worked at his tattoo parlor in Kilgore, Uncertain, and Gun Barrell City on a rotating shift. He was also a member, and president, of the Uncertain Saint’s MC.

  Peek had started the MC a long time ago after the death of his and Alison’s one and only son.

  Apparently it’d been due to drugs, but I’d never broached the subject any further than what he was willing to give.

  I’d met him that first night, twelve years ago, and he’d helped me cope with my decision to leave medicine, as well as my parent’s outrage over the fact.

  He’d also introduced me to the Chief of Police, Chief Rhodes, on my next shore leave.

  We’d hit it off, and I’d found myself a job with Kilgore Police Department the minute my feet met even earth once again.

  “I’m doing well, Peek. This,” I said, holding out my hand to Nikki, who ignored me as she showed Alison pictures of nephews. “Is Nikki.”

  Peek smiled, moving closer until he was directly behind Nikki with his body turned towards me, remembering just as Alison had. “I’m glad to hear that, boyo. What’re ye doin’ here?”

  Nikki turned when she heard Peek at her back.

  Eyes wide in wonder she said, “I’ve never met an Irishman before.”

  Peek turned to her and gave her a leering grin. “Would you like to?”

  Rolling my eyes, I moved until my arm was around Nikki’s neck. “She’s spoken for, big guy. And I’m fond of Nikki’s eyes,” I said looking pointedly at an innocent looking Alison who had the grace to look chagrined.

  A few months ago, Peek had been working on a client, a young female who was getting one of the most-hated-by-Peek tattoo’s ever, a butterfly, when the young client had grabbed Peek’s crotch.

  Alison, having witnessed the incident, flipped. Then threw the girl and her half-finished butterfly out the front door.

  I’d been the one to take the call when the girl had called to report the apparent ‘assault,’ which were actually just a few scratches on her face.

  “I can’t help that that girl was a dumbass who thought it was appropriate to grab a man’s, a married man’s, crotch,” Alison said stubbornly, before tossing a glare in her husband’s direction.

  “I can’t help that me package is irresistible!” Peek said in his Irish brogue.

  Nikki laughed, covering her mouth to contain her giggles before turning laughing eyes on me.

  “You ready to get that tattoo done, Owl?” I asked softly, ignoring the two bickering people to our sides.

  She nodded. “Yeah, I think it’s time.”

  Chapter 6

  If she even looks at me I’ll fuck her face up…with my killer glare, and hellacious cold shoulder.

  -Nikki to Lennox

  Nikki

  “Hello?” I answered my phone. I sounded tired.

  I’d literally been in bed for less than four hours, tops, and I was dying to go back to sleep.

  “Nikki?” Lennox whispered softly. “Where are you?”

  My eyes blinked open tiredly, and I rolled over to look at the clock.

  “In bed,” I moaned. “Why?”

  “Uhh, because you were supposed to be here thirty minutes ago. You told me you switched with Damon, and neither you or Damon is here, and Joslin’s on a fuckin’ rampage,” Lennox said hurriedly. “She’s telling everyone she can that you’re not here yet. I’ve been stalling, but you need to hurry!”

  “Crap,” I whispered, jolting up out of bed. “I’ll be there in ten minutes.”

  Pulling a brush through my hair as I went to the bathroom, I hurriedly pulled on clothes and rushed through my morning routine that would normally take forty five minutes, condensing it down into five.

  Which meant my hair was curly instead of straight like I usually styled it.

  It meant that my makeup was non-existent and my clothes were wrinkled because I’d had to pull them out of a pile of clothes on the foot of my bed that my cat loved to knock down when she could. And it also meant that I was wearing the wrong colored tennis shoes, because I couldn’t find my work pair.

  I was sure I’d get reprimanded for it, but if I’d known ahead of time that I’d get written up for it and nearly lose my job, I would’ve called in sick.

  My phone rang again, and I nearly panicked.

  I was religiously late.

  To everything.

  Birthdays, work, parties, dates.

  If it had a possibility for me to be late, I was late.

  Luckily, it was just my sister, Noel.

  “Nik-Nik, can I borrow your car? I have to have the brakes fixed on mine, and I need to drive to Tyler for school,” Noel said pleadingly.

  I rolled my eyes. “As long as you fill it back up with gas, and bring it back in time for me to drive home from work later.”

  “Deal,” she said. “I’ll come get it from your work in about ten minutes.”

  I closed the front door to my apartment behind me and started to hurry down the hall to the stairs. “Make it fifteen. I’m running late.”

  She laughed. “Why does that not surprise me?”

  “Watch it,” I teased. “See you later. Be careful today.”

  With that, I hung up and started to run down the stairs.

  I was going to be later than I’d said.

  Twelve minutes later, I was pushing through the doors of the ER with my bag over one shoulder.

  Since I didn’t have any food in my bag, because I hadn’t had time to make anything last night nor this morning, I stored my bag underneath the nurse’s station and made my way up to Bryan, the charge nurse.

  “Bryan,” I said, catching his attention. “I’m sorry I’m late. I had a really long night.”

  I didn’t tell him why I had a long night, however.

  And he didn’t ask.

  He nodded. “Don’t make a habit of it, Pena.”

  I nodded, then winced when the movement pulled the skin at my back, reminding me once again of the tattoo I’d gotten just hours ago. And Michael.

  “Bryan, when have we become allowed to wear colored shoes?” A snotty female voice belonging to Joslin, asked.

  Bryan looked up from his charting to Joslin.

  “We’re not allowed to wear colored shoes. You know the rules, white only,” Bryan said, sounding slightly annoyed.

  I walked away, knowing where this was going before I’d even had time to process the fact that Joslin was aiming for me today.

  “But Nikki’s wearing shoes like that,” Joslin tattled like a two year old.

  Bryan’s eyes turned to me, taking in my shoes.

  Then quickly turned back to his charting.

  It was the soft throat clearing from Joslin that had him sighing and looking at me.

  “Go change them, Pena,” Bryan said tiredly.

  What the fuck was that?

  “You want me to go home to change them?” I asked for clarification.

  He nodded. “Yeah. Now.”

  I shrugged. “That’s fine with me, but it’s gonna take me another hour or so to get back. I lent my car to my sister for the day. I’m sure she’s already picked it up by now. So I’ll have to call her for a ride home.”

  Bryan growled in frustration.

  “Nikki,” he said, standing up. “Follow me to the break room. We need to talk.”

  Stomach clutching, I followed Bryan out the doub
le doors and down a side hallway that led to our break room, all the while Joslin’s laughing eyes followed me out.

  I refrained from flipping her the bird, but only just barely.

  I was already in trouble, and I was fairly positive Joslin would just tell him what I’d done anyway. So I put on my big girl panties and followed dutifully behind Bryan.

  Once we were in the break room, he sat on the edge of the table and crossed his arms.

  “I’ve already had to talk with the director about your constant lateness,” he said without preamble.

  I pinched my lips closed.

  I had no reason.

  I was late.

  End of story.

  And always would be.

  “I’m sorry,” I said sincerely.

  And I was.

  Not for just past incidences, but for future incidences as well.

  He sighed and rolled his head up to the ceiling.

  “You need to get your ducks in a row,” he said. “I have a feeling that the only reason they’ve kept you is because you’re such a good worker. You’re always staying late, always picking up shifts and willing to move when we ask you to. But that doesn’t make up for the fact that you’re constantly late, and you need to try harder to get that fixed, otherwise I’ll be obligated to report this to the director, okay?” He asked, sounding tired.

  I nodded, uncrossing my arms and placing my hands in my pockets of my scrubs. “Sure.”

  I wouldn’t make any promises, though.

  That was just me. I was late.

  “I’ve also had a complaint about you from a few of the staff members for going off on coffee breaks too often,” he said carefully.

  A few staff members my ass!

  It was only one staff member!

  And that was because she’d just come back from sucking some man’s cock!

  Whore!

  “I see,” I said carefully. “And does this staff member happen to have a vendetta against me or something?”

  He blinked.

  “Um, no,” he answered lamely.

  Liar!

  “Well, I only went on one coffee break yesterday, Bryan. And that was right after I had to put an IV into some kid who’d just been shot in the head!” I all but snarled. “Excuse me if I can’t handle that and needed a fucking break!”