Stuck in Between (Bound by Your Love)

by Bennett, Blakely

  “We can’t, Jacqs. Not until after dinner. Why are you so upset? You’re eyes look red.”

  “Your brother—”

  “Donald...” he said, stretching his name out in disgust, “...is not worth your time or energy. Just ignore him.”

  “It’s not just him, your parents—”

  “Ignore them too. They’ll be at their own table at dinner, presiding over the meal like the king and queen. We have to suck it up and then we can leave just before dessert.”

  “These people, other than Lily of course, don’t deserve you! I don’t know how you put up with them.”

  “You’re cute when you stand up for me,” he said, touching the end of my nose. “Let’s find out how much longer until dinner starts.” He clasped my hand and I thought I might start to cry again. I swallowed down the emotion and shuffled to keep up.

  The staff had set up a massive white tent on the lawn between the guest house and the beach. The stunning view and the cool air made it the perfect setting for the dinner. The china, crystal, white table cloths and elaborate flower bouquets looked more like a setting for a wedding than a promotion to partner.

  “Is someone getting married?” I said.

  “It sure looks like it, doesn’t it?” he said, turning me to face him. “Thank you so much for coming with me.”

  “You don’t make saying no easy.”

  “That’s part of my charm,” he said with a cheesy smile.

  I punched him lightly on the shoulder and said, “I’m certain I was a poor choice given that I pissed off both your brother and parents.”

  “If you were defending my honor, then I love you even more for it.”

  Before I could fight him off, he held my head in his hands and tilted my lips to his. I kissed him back, wishing I could heal all his pain and torment. Circling his arm around my lower back, he drew me to him, bringing me back into his world.

  I melted against him and followed the familiar journey of our kiss. Lainie might never understand the depth of connection that I found in his embrace but it was akin to being rescued from an avalanche and swept up in an inferno. The knowledge of his history tore at my heart and opened more space for Bond to slip inside it.

  “Get a room,” Lily said, laughing. “See, she’s still into you. I was right.”

  “Shut up, Lily,” Bond said, but I could hear the warm affection in his voice.

  “I’m just saying!” She giggled and smiled. “Dinner starts in ten minutes and you, Jacqs, are sitting right next to me.”

  “Oh, that’s a relief. Do you know who’s on my other side?”

  “Cruella Deville, I’m sorry for you.”

  “I’m sure she’ll give me a piece of her mind after my conversation with Donny.”

  Bond circled behind me and wound his arms across my stomach.

  “Just talk to me and don’t let her get to you,” Lily said. “Patricia’s a bitch, but can you imagine being married to Donny? Just gives me chills thinking about it.”

  I glanced past her to the guests making their way across the pool deck to the tent.

  “I guess we should go find our seats,” Bond said in my ear, causing chills to run down my neck.

  The heels of the trophy wives clicked along the wooden floor of the tent as the crowd settled into their places.

  Bond’s father, Joseph, stood behind the head table with a glass in hand, and said, “Welcome to all who have come to celebrate Donald’s place as a partner in our law firm. His years of hard work have been a source of pride for Eleanor and me. Let’s break bread in honor of Donald!”

  Many people at the tables raised their glasses and shouted, “Here, here.”

  Several servers delivered the first course, which was a single scallop on a bed of butter lettuce. Having watched so many cooking shows, I recognized the perfection of the sear on the butter poached seafood.

  Patricia arrived late, and I could feel the tension of her immediate distaste of having to sit next to me. Impeccably dressed in her Gucci floral-lace and silk dress, she shifted her long, straight, blond hair off her shoulder as if flicking me away with the motion.

  “What did you think of the scallop?” Lily asked, garnering my attention.

  “I love scallops but haven’t had much success in cooking them myself. This one was perfection, don’t you think?”

  “She’s glaring at you,” Lily whispered into my ear.

  “I can feel her stare on the back of my neck,” I whispered.

  She laughed and said, “Can you believe Mitch has to sit next to Donny?”

  “I hope he punches him out.”

  Lily giggled again and said, “I don’t think that would go over well with Dad.”

  “Probably not, but it would be fun to watch.”

  I spotted a couple talking to Bond’s parents, and the man looked strikingly similar to Red. “Lily, do you see that couple talking to your father?”

  “That’s Mr. and Mrs. Burke. Cold people if you ask me.”

  “Red mentioned that they might be here.”

  “You know,” Patricia said, glowering down her thin pointed nose at me, “my mother-in-law thinks you are far beneath the family.”

  “You know,” I said, turning to face her and mimicking her tone, “I always consider the source.”

  “What are you implying?”

  “You think someone like me would aspire to be someone like you and you couldn’t be farther from the truth. Having money does not make you a good person, deserving of respect. It just makes you a person with money. As far as I can see, none of Mitch’s family deserves my respect other than Lily and Mitch.”

  “Don’t think you will ever be a part of this family.”

  “Thank god for that,” I said, shaking my head at the thought.

  Patricia talked over me and said, “Lily, I don’t know what you see in this woman.”

  “Only the best thing that’s ever happened to Mitch.”

  Patricia harrumphed and turned away. Thankfully, she ignored me for the rest of dinner.

  I spent most of the meal chit-chatting with Lily and watching Bond on the other side of the table. He held himself together which had to be a minor miracle. Just before the cakes and other desserts were brought out, he rescued me from the party.

  “Let’s get the fuck out of here,” he said.

  We hugged Lily goodbye and strolled in silence hand and hand to the car. Before opening my car door for me, he held me in a tight embrace. We rocked in silence until he said, “Thanks again, Jacqs.”

  “You are welcome.” As I drove out to the main road, I asked, “Are you okay?”

  “Just a lot on my mind.”

  He stared out the side window and my heart broke again, knowing what that day of all days meant to him. I would never forgive Donny or his parents.

  The gathering at Red’s was in full swing by the time we arrived. I really didn’t feel like being there, but I had to talk to Red before I could sneak away.

  Bond and I entered the kitchen, and instead of choosing his usual beer he opened the cabinet above the stove and poured himself a tumbler of scotch.

  “I’m going to sit outside for a while,” he said.

  “Okay. I’m not sure how long I plan to stay. I hate this dress and I feel my socializing quota has already been extracted. Shall I come and get you when I’m ready to leave?”

  “I’ll probably crash here tonight.”

  “I can stay if you’d rather hang out here.”

  “Nah. I won’t be much company. Thanks again for coming with me,” he said, reaching toward me for another hug.

  I threw my arms around his back and buried my head in his chest. I willed my healing energy of love to penetrate his broken heart.

  “Baby, I can’t lose you. Please think about giving us another chance. I promise to do it right this time.” He pulled away and gazed down at me. “I love you.” His shoulders slumped as he ambled away to the French doors.

  Damn, I thought.
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  After checking out back for Red, I entered the game room and found him playing pool with Stay. “Can I steal him for a minute?”

  “Jacqs to the rescue from your brutal loss,” Stay said to Red.

  “Rematch later?” Red asked.

  “Sure and maybe I can grab Blue and we can play doubles,” he said, hanging his cue stick back onto the wall rack.

  “Are you okay? You look distraught,” Red said as we crossed the room together.

  “Can we go to your room?” I asked once we were out of earshot of Stay.

  “Sure,” he said, drawing out the word.

  “Not like that,” I said, jogging up the stairs to the second floor.

  “I like the dress you chose, especially walking behind you,” he said as he followed me.

  Once we entered the room, I took in the man before me. His slate green cargo slacks and long-sleeved shirt hugged his frame, and I felt tempted to rub my hand right over his fly. The outline of his cock tempted me, causing my pussy to twitch with desire.

  Focus woman! I chastised in my head. “Do you know what day today is?”

  “Ummm, the twentieth? I know it’s not your birthday. Yours isn’t for a few months.”

  After closing the bedroom door behind us, I said, “Lily told me everything. How could you have forgotten that today is the anniversary?”

  “Oh shit! Where’s Bond?”

  “He’s out back with a large tumbler of scotch. He doesn’t know that I know, and I want it kept that way.”

  “How bad was the party?”

  “Honestly, I have no idea how he kept it so together, but it explains so much. Now I understand why he doesn’t drive and why he is unable to open up his heart again.”

  “I have to check on him,” Red said, striding to the door.

  “Wait.”

  “What?”

  “We can’t tell him tomorrow. There’s no way.”

  “No, of course we can’t. Fuck, I can’t believe I let it slip my mind. He usually gets drunk on the day of the accident and then has a major meltdown a few days later.” He leaned against the door and said, “I’m glad that you now know.”

  “I’m not sure I am.”

  “I bet.”

  “Please don’t go yet, I have something else to tell you,” I said, shaking.

  “What is it? You’re trembling.”

  “He kissed me and I kissed him back.”

  “Oh … well … given the circumstances…”

  “I’m confused. I don’t want to lose what we’ve started, but I don’t know how I feel about Bond now, knowing what I know. I still love him and I can’t imagine what he must be going through.”

  “Jacqs, we will work this out together. Come here.” He encompassed me against his large body and I felt safe for the moment.

  Looking up I said, “This is where I’ve wanted to be since I found out.” Sighing into his hug, I wanted to stay there, hiding from reality.

  Running his hands over my hips and ass, he said, “You’re not wearing any underwear!”

  “I can’t with this dress or they’ll give me lines.” I chuckled slightly.

  “Jesus Jacqs, what am I going to do with you?”

  “I hope we get a chance to find out.”

  “Yeah, me too. I need to go check on Bond. I don’t want to leave him alone for too long.”

  “I know. I just wanted to say goodbye before I take off.”

  Still holding me tightly, he said, “Please don’t go.”

  “I think it’ll be best for all of us. You can look after Bond and right now I’d just get in the way.”

  “Come by tomorrow—”

  “That could be awkward. Bond said he’s planning to spend the night here.”

  “Text me when you get home so I know you arrived safely, and I’ll call you tomorrow when I know what the day’s looking like.”

  Red lifted me up and lowered me to stand on the chair by the door. It made me slightly taller than him. I threw my arms over his shoulders and bent my head down for a kiss. My heart had thawed somewhat for Bond; however, it hadn’t diminished the lust and longing I felt for Red that had caught like wildfire. Somehow, all the anger I had felt for him became desire, and I’d already started to let him into my heart. I could no easier walk away from him than Bond.

  As my lips touched Red’s, tears filled my eyes and tumbled down my cheeks. My anxiety of how our situation would resolve spiked just before all my thoughts were wiped clean. As our tongues met, I willingly lost myself in Red’s kiss. He lingered, softly caressing his mouth to mine. When we both opened our eyes, I saw love reflected there.

  He kissed away the tears on my cheek and said, “We will sort it out together, Little One. Trust in me.”

  “I do.”

  *****

  By the time I arrived home, I felt completely drained. I hadn’t been to hot yoga classes for a few weeks, and the accumulation of stress without any hardcore exercise was taking its toll. I unzipped my dress as I walked through the front door and laid it down on the laundry pile. I slipped into my robe, settling on the bed with my cell phone.

  Me: I’m home. How’s Bond?

  Red: Three sheets to the wind.

  Me: Already?

  Red: Doesn’t take long with scotch.

  Me: What’s he doing?

  Red: Hitting on anything that walks.

  Me: You might try getting some food in him. I don’t think he ate much at dinner.

  Red: Short of throwing him in the pool, when he’s like this, there’s not much I can do but watch and make sure he doesn’t hurt himself.

  Me: I hate this.

  Red: So do I.

  Me: What are we going to do?

  Red: Bond has a staff meeting tomorrow at twelve, so can you swing by after that?

  My mind said, “Leave this mess alone, Jacqueline,” but in truth, I felt better when I was with Red than I had in a long time. Was I just supposed to stop seeing him? Stop hanging out with the group? I honestly didn’t know the right thing to do under the circumstances. It had been a long while since I had been Bond’s girlfriend so why did I still feel a loyalty to him?

  Me: I really want to see you and at the same time, it feels wrong. Not when we’re together. Then it feels totally right but I’m fucked up over what happened to Bond.

  Red: Tell me what you want.

  Red: Give me a sec, I’ll be right back.

  Me: I guess I want it to be easy and it’s not, and now it seems even more complicated than before.

  I flicked on my iPod station and went to the bathroom to get ready for bed while I waited to hear back from Red. After I emerged from the bathroom, I still hadn’t received a text, so I climbed under the covers and drifted off to sleep.

  Something startled me awake and I sat up in bed. I checked my cell phone—no texts—but I noticed the time was 1:30 a.m. The doorbell rang again and I got out of bed, threw on my robe and tied the sash as I stumbled to the door.

  “Who is it?”

  “It’s me, Red, let me in.”

  I opened the door and he carried a drunk Bond in over his shoulder.

  “Is he okay?” I said, following them over to the couch. “Where’s his shirt?”

  “I don’t know, somewhere in the house. He’s passed out at the moment,” Red said, sitting him down on the couch and turning his legs so he fell over onto his side.

  I collected a pillow and blanket from the hall closet. “Should we run him to the hospital?”

  “No, he just needs to sleep it off and I didn’t want to leave him alone at his place.”

  “What about your other guests?” I lifted Bond’s head and placed a pillow under it.

  “Bond and Blue really got into, it so I thought it best if I extracted him from the situation.”

  “Bond and Blue? That’s odd. What the hell happened?”

  “I think I’ll leave it to them to fill in the details.”

  “That doesn’t sound good. Don’t worr
y about him; I’ll drop him off at his apartment in the morning on my way to Lainie’s.”

  “Thank you,” he said as he pulled off Bond’s boots. “I wish I was seeing you under better circumstances.”

  “Yeah, me too.”

  Together we spread the blanket over Bond.

  “I think I’m going to skip the next few Saturdays,” Red said. “These parties are wearing me out.”

  “I can well imagine.”

  “Cute robe,” he said. “Are you naked under there?”

  “Wouldn’t you like to know,” I said, tightening the robe around myself.

  “Seriously though, can I lie down with you for a few minutes? Just let me hold you until you fall back asleep?”

  “I’d like that a lot.” I slipped my hand into his and led him to my room. Untying my robe, I let it fall to the floor exposing my nakedness and climbed under the covers into my side of the bed.

  “I’m leaving my clothes on.”

  “I think that’s highly advisable.”

  After he had removed his shoes, he joined me, moving toward the middle of the bed and spooned me to him. It was as if every molecule in my body sighed in contentment.

  “Should I set the alarm to wake you? Bond finding us like this would be horrible,” I said, scooting in even closer.

  “Stop wiggling, Jacqs,” he hissed.

  I laughed and said, “Sorry.”

  “No alarm necessary, I won’t sleep.”

  “Okay,” I said, yawning. “I will.”

  “Goodnight.”

  CHAPTER EIGHT

  Lost Without You

  by Robin Thicke

  When I awoke to my alarm, I sat up, stretching my arms above me. I smiled, recalling how Red had snuggled me to sleep. Then I remembered that Bond still remained in my apartment, and my stomach twisted. Ugh, I thought. I pushed off the bed and headed into the bathroom for a shower.

  I let the stream of water run over my head, once again waking me to the reality of the situation. My heart hurt for Bond, but at the same time my soul longed to spend more time with Red—without all the complications. I hoped Lainie could put aside her judgments long enough to help me sort through it all.