Stuck in Between (Bound by Your Love)

by Bennett, Blakely

  “I’m okay,” I whispered but only Red seemed to hear. He lifted a cup of water with a straw and brought it to my mouth. The relief on his face caused my eyes to water.

  “Bond,” Red said, as he brushed my hair away from my face.

  “Holy hell, Jacqs,” Bond said as he scooted his chair up next to me.

  “So is this what I have to do to get you guys in the same room?” I laughed slightly, but it caused my head to hurt.

  “You’re in pain,” Red said, standing. “I’ll go get the nurse.”

  “I’ll do it,” Bond said, new tears wetting his cheeks. He dashed to the door and tapped my mother on the shoulder.

  She approached me and kissed me on the forehead. “I’m so relieved. I’ll be right back. I promised to call your sister. She’s worried sick.”

  “Girl, you gave us a fright,” Lainie said, crouching down beside me. “Don’t do that again.”

  “Yes, ma’am,” I said.

  She leaned in close to my ear and said, “Bond and Red have been civil with each other. I even saw them hug.”

  “All part of my master plan.” I closed my eyes against the bright lights.

  I felt a vise grip squeeze on my hand, and I croaked, “Hey!”

  “You need to stay awake, Jacqs,” Red said. “They did a CAT scan and that lovely head of yours is fine, but they don’t like that you keep checking out for spans of time.

  “How long have I been out?”

  “I’ve been here for at least three hours,” Stay said. “Red called me at about two-thirty.”

  I held my hand out to him. “Thank you for coming. For me and for Bond.”

  “Always.”

  Bond came back in with a nurse in tow.

  “I hear you’ve got a pretty good headache. That’s not surprising.” To Red she said, “I suggest we ice the left side of her head again, and I’ll give her something for the pain after I take her vitals.”

  “Sounds good,” Red said.

  I found it unexpected and heartwarming that Red seemed to be in charge of my care.

  As if he could hear my thoughts, he said, “You’re coming home with me once they let you out.”

  “Will you be my personal nurse?”

  “You’ll get a full dose of my bedside manner.” He twitched his eyebrows.

  “Don’t make me laugh,” I said, struggling to suppress a giggle.

  After the nurse took my blood pressure and temperature she injected something into my IV causing me to immediately relax.

  “Get some of that stuff,” I mumbled to Red.

  “I’ll be right back with a bag of ice,” the nurse said as she passed my mother on the way out of the room.

  “How’s she doing?” my mother asked Red.

  “She has no choice other than to live because Bond and I would chase her to hell and back if she left us.”

  “Absolutely,” Bond said.

  Their solidarity stunned me.

  “Me too,” Lainie said.

  “Me three,” Stay said, catching Lainie’s eye. Something passed between them, and I hoped Lainie would give him a chance.

  “Jacqueline, I promised Samantha that as soon as I knew you were going to be okay I would come back home and let her come here.”

  “Does anyone know when they’ll be letting me out of this place?”

  “I’ll go find out,” Red said.

  “Maybe Sam can come to Red’s once I get out of here? What time is it now?”

  “It’s almost six in the morning,” Lainie said.

  “You have to open the shop soon, girl.”

  “You let me worry about that. You scared the shit out of me—out of all of us. Don’t do it again.”

  “I have no intention. How is the other driver?”

  Red strolled back and tossed the bag of ice to Bond who held it against my head. “They’ll let you go today but the doctor has to be the one to sign you out. It could still be a few hours.”

  “You’re in good hands,” my mother said. “I need to go have a good cry and get some sleep before Samantha goes into work.”

  “I love you, Mom. I’m sorry to have worried you.”

  She stared at me for a moment, smoothed my hair and said, “Take care of her.” She seemed to be struggling not to cry as she headed for the door.

  “I’ll walk out with you,” Lainie said. She bent down and embraced me gently. “Call me after you get settled at Red’s.”

  “I will,” I said, hugging her back.

  Lainie grabbed Stay’s arm, and he winked at me, his half-cocked smile lighting up his face.

  After they all had left, an awkward silence filled the room. I peered up at Bond and really took in his appearance. His arrogant veneer seemed to be missing. Touching his hand, I guided the ice away from my head. “It’s getting too cold.”

  “Damn, Jacqs.” Bond breathed out heavily. “Red said I can stay with him until you’re well.”

  “You would do that?” I asked with my eyes opened wide.

  “At this point, I’d do just about anything. I can’t lose you too.” Tears regrouped in the wells of his eyes and threatened to spill over again.

  I glanced over to Red and he nodded.

  “I’ll be happy to have you there, but how will you get to and from work.”

  “We’ll sort that out,” Red said.

  Alone with Red and Bond, butterflies started to dance in my stomach. “Maybe I’m still passed out, because this doesn’t seem real. I mean I’m happy you’re both here, ecstatically so— Maybe I should just shut the fuck up.” Was it too soon for me to hope that we would all be friends in the end?

  “One day at a time,” Bond said.

  I reached out and held his hand. “No one has said. What happened to the other driver?”

  “He is fine, although had Red let me punch him out as I intended, he wouldn’t be so fine.”

  “Well, that’s a relief. I saw what my car looked like but not his. I don’t remember seeing him at the scene.”

  “He’ll be doing jail time at any rate,” Red said.

  “Oh shit!” I shouted.

  “What?” Bond and Red said simultaneously.

  “I have to be juggling two jobs come Monday morning and—”

  “Don’t worry about that, Jacqs.” Red touched my arm and said, “I’ll talk to the boss for you. I have an in.” He gave me a cheeky grin.

  “Very funny,” I said, fighting to keep my laugh at bay. Giggles threatened to surface and for a flash of a second, I felt I might be hallucinating. A cacophony of chuckles erupted until they morphed into tears.

  Bond swept me up in his arms and held me tight. “You’re going to be alright, Jacqs.” He soothed my back as the sobs rolled through. The warmth of Red enveloped my back, and I felt his weight on the bed behind me. Sandwiched between the men I loved, I cried out all that had happened over the last few weeks and what I felt at the moment of the crash. My life didn’t flash before me like it’s told in stories and movies, but I did have one very powerful thought. That I was going to die before I had a chance to have a family, something I had convinced myself I didn’t even want.

  “We love you,” Red whispered into my ear as we all broke apart.

  “I need to ... step outside.” I heard Bond’s voice crack.

  I held my arm out to him and said, “Stay. Please stay.”

  “I’ll give you two a few minutes,” Red said and stood to leave.

  “Thank you,” I mouthed to him. I saw the love radiating from his eyes, and I prayed to the gods of life and love that I would be able to navigate between the two men who held my heart without hurting either of them.

  Bond rose and paced away from the bed. He ran his fingers through his long brown hair and breathed out heavily. He pivoted to face me, his palms held out at his sides.

  I witnessed a young vulnerable Bond and wanted to rescue him from his pain.

  “There’s something I need to tell you,” he said.

  “Okay..
.” I said, struggling to sit up.

  Bond reached for the controls and pressed the button to raise the back of the bed.

  “Thanks.”

  He placed his hands in his pockets and stared down at his feet. “I was in an accident years ago, before we met. I did prison time because the person in the car—” He glanced up at me and continued, “...my fiancé died, and her parents were determined to have me pay for her death. It’s not that I blame them ... then or now ... and yes, we had been drinking.”

  “Bond—” I wanted to spare him the details of telling his story but he stopped me.

  “Let me get this out, okay.”

  I didn’t say anything more.

  He paused, the pain etched across his forehead. He looked away and continued, “We were arguing as I drove us back to the condo—we lived together—because she kissed a mutual friend to get my attention. Well she got my attention; I put on quite a show before we left the party and decked the guy. I only had a couple of beers, but she had drunk a lot of tequila and when I yelled at her for embarrassing me in front of all of our friends, she punched my arm a bunch of times and I lost control of the car.”

  He sat down at the end of the bed and took another deep breath.

  “I’m not blaming Celeste. I should have pulled over instead of fighting while we were on the road. I loved her, and although furious, I never ever wished her dead. I spent several weeks in the ICU and as soon as I got out, I was arrested for vehicular manslaughter.”

  We sat quietly for a few minutes until he said, “Well, say something.”

  “Sorry, I wasn’t sure you were done. Please don’t be mad at Lily but she told me some of it at Donny’s promotion party.”

  “You’ve known since then?” He jerked upright and sat in the chair to the left of me.

  “Honestly, I had hoped you would tell me yourself and I—I didn’t think it was my place to bring it up.” I reached out and touched his arm. “Don’t be angry with me or Lily. She assumed I knew before I had a chance to stop her.”

  “And you don’t care?” He furrowed his brow and squinted his eyes.

  “Of course I care. It explains so much about you; why you would never really let me in; why you don’t drive; why one person would never be enough. And I hurt for you, Bond. No one should have to go through such a thing.” I patted the bed and Bond scooted in next to me. Throwing my arms around him, I squeezed tightly. “Thank you for telling me and trusting me with the truth.” We held onto each other for a few minutes.

  Once we broke apart, Bond said, “When Red called me, I let it go to voicemail. I had no intention of speaking to him, ever. He had stolen the one person in the world I could never live—”

  “I’m still here—”

  “Let me finish,” he said, his expression serious.

  “Sorry,” I said meekly.

  “When Stay called me and told me you had been in an accident and that I might lose you for good, I heard the echo of Celeste’s voice in my head. She said that it’s really up to me whether I lose you or not. Maybe it’s the withdrawal from alcohol or my present and past colliding in a way that’s too close to the truth—”

  “You haven’t lost me, Bond.”

  “In a way, I have, and I’m really the only one to blame. You were right; I didn’t want to have to look at myself. Stay pointed that out several times over the last few weeks.”

  “Remind me that I owe him a big hug.” I laughed.

  Bond harrumphed and scrunched his eyebrows.

  Red ducked his head into the room. “Is safe to enter?”

  “Two more minutes and then please come back,” I said. I already missed his healing presence.

  “Sure,” he said and closed the door behind him.

  “Are you sure it’s a good idea for you to stay at Red’s? You’ll be trapped there. I mean, it’d be great to have you, but I don’t want to restart the feud and I’m not sure I could—”

  “As Stay has drilled into me, if I want you in my life, I have to get over my shit. I’m making no promises other than I’m working on it.”

  “That’s good enough for me.”

  “I love you, Jacqs and I’m going to show you that I mean it.”

  “Good.” Somehow the weight of his disclosures lightened the pain from the past. “I have a question if you’re up for it.”

  “Anything.”

  “The tattoo that you covered over?”

  “I had it done in prison to honor Celeste but it was done so poorly I had it reworked. I consider it fixed not covered over.”

  “That makes sense. Thanks for telling me. Damn, I’m exhausted. Can you lower the bed down a bit and get Red?”

  He kissed me lightly on the lips and stared into my eyes. “Don’t go anywhere.”

  “Where would I go?” I chuckled.

  “Just saying...”

  Red followed Bond back into the room.

  “Are you thirsty? Do you need another pillow?” Red asked.

  “Water would be good and maybe some food? My stomach is stirring up a racket.”

  “I’ll go ask the staff about some food,” Bond said and left the room.

  Red held up the cup with the straw, and I sipped the water. “How did it go?”

  “He told me about the accident.” I was just about to ask Red to hold me when he slipped in behind me and wrapped me up in his warm embrace.

  “I thought he might. That’s progress.”

  Caressing the hair on his forearm, I sighed back into him and closed my eyes.

  “No going to sleep,” he whispered in my ear. “I’ll pinch those big nipples of yours if I have to, to keep you awake.”

  “You are a meany,” I said as I melted into Red, feeling so relaxed.

  “You really scared me, Jacqs. I’m not sure I’ll ever let you out of my sight again.”

  “Tie me down to the bed?”

  “You have no idea. I need to find out how long we have to wait until I’m allowed to penetrate all of your orifices.” He pulled the hair away from my neck and nibbled.

  “That’s sure ... to keep me awake.” I giggled.

  “That’s a wonderful sound.”

  “Thank you for being here, Red.”

  “There is no place I’d rather be than beside you, but I’ll be happy once we’re back home.”

  “Yeah, me too. Listen, are you sure about Bond staying at your place? He seems different but I’m worried—”

  “Let me do the worrying. All you have to do is recover and let us take care of you.”

  I turned to the side to see his face. “I love you,” I said, cupping his cheeks and pulling his mouth to mine. Even through the haze of the painkiller, the storm of our attraction surged and I could feel my body responding.

  “Get a room,” Bond said, carrying in a tray of food and placing it on the rolling table.

  “We’re in one, silly,” I said, leaning forward so Red could get out from behind me.

  “Good thing you don’t have a roommate,” Bond said, pointing to the bed on the other side of the room.

  “You mean other than yourself?”

  “Very funny, Jacqs.” Bond pressed the button that caused the bed to tilt upright so I could eat.

  I adjusted myself so Bond could roll the food in front of me. Just as I took the first bite of scrambled eggs, the door to the room flung open.

  “What the fuck,” Cat said as she and Kev rushed into the room. “We just heard the message from Red when we got up.”

  “I’m okay, as you can see,” I said and forked another mouthful of food.

  “Don’t do that again,” Kev said with a look of panic.

  “I don’t plan on it.”

  “How’s the car?” Cat asked, sitting down on the side of the bed.

  “She’s a goner.”

  “Damn, I always loved that car,” Cat said, squeezing my leg.

  “Yeah, me too.”

  Kev took my hand as I chewed. “I’m relieved to see you in one p
iece. I’m sorry to say we have to get going soon. We are off to breakfast at Momma Cat’s house, which is always a sordid affair and quite the drive.”

  “I’m sitting right here,” Cat said with displeasure.

  “Come on, Cat, you hate being there after the first fifteen minutes. You know she never lets up.”

  “I’m allowed to diss her, not you.”

  “Right. Sorry love,” he said, touching her shoulder and looking over at me with wide eyes.

  I did my best not to laugh.

  “When do you get sprung?” Kev asked.

  “In a couple more hours,” Red said. “She’ll be staying at my place.”

  “That’s a good idea,” Cat said.

  “And so will I,” Bond said, folding his arms across his chest.

  I touched his leg, trying to let him know that he needn’t be defensive.

  “That should be interesting,” Kev said and flashed me a smile.

  The door opened again, and the same nurse entered. “I’m about to go off duty and wanted to check your vitals one last time.”

  “Okay.”

  Kev and Cat waved goodbye, and Red shifted the food tray out of the way.

  As the nurse took my blood pressure, she said, “The doctor should be in within the hour.”

  “Thanks,” I said.

  “Since you’ve been up for a while, it’s fine for you to sleep. Rest will help you heal.”

  “I thought she needed to stay awake with a concussion,” Red said, stepping closer to the bed.

  “No, and I’m sure the doctor will explain it all to you. They were just concerned because they couldn’t rouse her for a while.”

  After the nurse had finished her vitals check, Bond lowered the bed, and I drifted into an easy drug-filled stupor.

  “How’s our patient doing?” I heard and blinked my eyes against the bright lights.

  “Ready to go home,” I croaked.

  “That’s a good sign,” a man in a white coat said as he approached. He checked my pupils with his flashlight, causing me to squint. “Head still hurts?”

  “I think the medicine the nurse gave me has started to wear off.”

  He palpated the back of my neck and asked, “Any stiffness?”