by D. Kelly
The nurse goes to check one more time to see if Chad wants to feed the baby and comes back with strict orders. She takes Kate by the arm and leads her to the washing and gowning station. “The baby’s mother said there is only one person aside from herself she would want to give Lucas his first feeding and that’s you, Kate.”
Tears are streaming down her face and she’s nodding, doing what is asked of her, but I know what a bittersweet moment this is for Kate. Now here were are, Daniel and I, in front of the nursery window watching Kate sit with Lucas trying to feed him from this tiny little bottle. Five minutes ago you couldn’t have dragged us to this window and now you can’t drag either of us away.
For me, it’s a sad moment because I’m wishing this was a memory we had with Lila Hope and the thought that Kate could be feeding my child with another woman right now makes me sick. Daniel watches her with longing. This is what he wanted, a baby and a life with Kate. Now, after her night with Marc, he’s barely able to talk to her. They’ve got a long road ahead if they’re ever going to be friends again. I’m glad Kate and I have so much history to build off of to come back from our problems. She and Daniel barely knew each other and that’s why they can’t just pick up and build off it.
When Kate finishes feeding Lucas and the nurse puts him back in the bassinette, the doctor comes in and checks him out all over again. It’s decided to still keep him here as a precaution but he’ll be discharged to the main nursery in the morning. Vanessa did well; she brought him into the world happy and healthy. Once Kate takes the gown off, she flees to the restroom. I’d give anything in the world if I could take away her pain.
Daniel is driving me crazy; he won’t stop pacing. If he keeps it up, at this rate they might give him his own padded room. Kate tries to talk to him when she comes back but he brushes her off. The pain she’s feeling is written all over her face but only time will fix this mess, well, that and possibly a DNA test.
Vanessa is finally brought to a room about seven hours after her delivery and her blood pressure is looking good. She’s tired and sore, which is to be expected for sure; she just had major surgery and a baby. Well, I guess it’s considered one thing, but fuck that…to me, either one is a major feat. We take turns rotating in to see how she’s doing and by now Kate has a full video collage of Lucas on her phone. Vanessa can’t see him until they discharge him from the NICU and into the main nursery in the morning. The doctor doesn’t want her up and around just yet since they just stabilized her pressure. The man is a stickler for protocol and is flipping out about the DNA results; he wants us to hold off delivering them. Vanessa and I both explained to him that knowing will be much less stressful than not knowing and he finally relented.
Thank God.
For the first time, I really pay attention to how Chad and Vanessa interact together and it reminds me of Kate and me. I’m happy she has someone who loves her like that and who wants to raise the baby with her. I might still think Vanessa is a bitch in the back of my mind but I get the fact that she made a mistake and deserves forgiveness just like the rest of us.
Daniel swaps with me for his visit with Vanessa and I find Kate in the lobby. She’s sitting curled up on a couch in the corner. After taking the seat next to her, I pull her into my lap and she rests her head on my shoulder.
“What are you thinking about, Katie Grace?”
She sighs, “I’m just thinking about what blessings babies are and how I wish with all my heart and soul that I could have spent just a day with Lila Hope.”
“Me too, Kate, me too.”
“What’s going through your head, Mike? How are you dealing with all of this?”
“Honestly, I’ve been thinking how natural you look with Lucas in your arms. You were born to be a mom, Kate. It doesn’t surprise me, though; you had one of the best ones ever. I know you don’t like to talk about Lila but out of all the bad things that have stuck with me from the day she died only one thing sticks out more.”
“What would that be?” she whispers.
“That right before it happened she told you so many times how much she loved you. That was a gift from God, Kate. The last words she ever said and they were professing her love for you. No parent would wish to go out any other way.”
She looks surprised. “All these years, Mike, and I’ve never thought about it that way. Not once. Thank you” she says, placing a kiss on the top of my head. “You’ve always had a way of making me look at the bright side of things.”
“You seem a little more at peace now, is it because Lucas is actually here?” I’m really curious to know what she’s thinking.
“No, it’s because I realized that night at Vanessa’s when Daniel went all Chad crazy how much I already loved Lucas. All the time I spent with Vanessa—rubbing her belly, feeling him kick, getting to talk to him—I guess it was therapeutic in a way. Lucas will change things no matter who he belongs to, there’s no doubt about that, but we can all still be happy regardless.”
And that’s why I love her so much because eventually no matter how bad a situation is she’ll find a bright side to it. “So what about Daniel? How did that go last night?”
“He agreed to taking baby steps to try and regain our friendship but he’s not interested in a romance. I broke his heart and the tattoo probably just made it break harder.” The tone of her voice is so sad; Kate hates the idea of hurting anyone, let alone actually doing it.
“You finally saw it, that’s good. It’s been a secret for way too long. Besides, I think it was only a secret from you. Everyone else had already seen it and freaked out about it.”
“I hate that I’ve wrecked his idea of the way he wanted to display his love on his skin. It’s partially my fault, when he mentioned it I told him I couldn’t wait until the day my name was there.”
Kate wraps her arms tighter around my neck and I pull her closer to me. “It wasn’t your fault, Kate; it was too fast for anyone. The sentiment was nice, but anything could have happened. If it wouldn’t have been me, it would have been Vanessa or Marc. The timing for all of us right now is just off. What was that thing your mom used to always say when things started going super crazy all at once and lasted for a while?”
The laughter that peals out of her is a welcome sound. “Oh man, I had almost forgot about that. She would always say ‘Mercury must be in retrograde’.”
I’m laughing with her, “Yup, that was it. Well, right now that must be happening.” Lifting my head to the ceiling, I call out, “Hey, Lila, wanna see if you can pull any strings and fix this Mercury in retrograde situation…thanks, love!”
Kate’s crying but at least they are tears of happiness instead of sadness. Daniel shoots us a dirty look, but I don’t give a fuck, he can blow me. If he wants to hear Kate laugh he should be talking to her.
“Come on, let’s go to the cafeteria and get some dinner.” After pulling her to her feet, we walk hand in hand all the way there.
***
Twelve and a half hours.
That’s how long it took for the guy from the lab to come back with the DNA test results. By now, Bev and Rick have shown up, too. Bev just couldn’t wait any longer; she said she wanted to be here for her boys to see her first grandson. I’m flattered they love me like that, but I still don’t want this baby to be mine.
The technician gives the envelope to Vanessa and she nervously opens it. Chad’s holding on to her the entire time, and the doctor’s standing in the wings, waiting to shout out an ‘I told you so’ when her blood pressure spikes.
I actually admire Vanessa’s strength; instead of being tasteless she actually read through the paperwork and announced her son instead of the father.
“Welcome to the world, Lucas Hunter McCormick.”
McCormick not Matthews.
I’m not the father.
Hell yeah! I’m not the father.
There are a myriad of expressions and a host of congratulations flooding the room. I know Vanessa wanted Daniel to be
the father; it’s a much nicer story to tell your child that you dated his dad and not just drugged him for sex. Besides, they did have a relationship that lasted a decent length of time.
Kate gives hugs and congratulations and then quietly leaves the room. Once she is out, though, she flees like a bat out of hell and I’m right behind her. I find her just around the corner on her knees, sobbing hysterically. It’s the way I figured she would be but I was hoping I was wrong. After picking her up off the floor, I carry her out to my truck and drive her home. I’m not leaving her alone so I pick her up and carry her upstairs and climb into bed with her.
I stay by her side until she cries herself to sleep and then I pull her close to me and hold on tight for what is sure to be the last time. Because no matter how much I wish she was in love with me, I know she isn’t. The first time I really suspected it was that night Daniel seemed jealous of Chad, but what cemented the knowledge was the night she fled from Vanessa’s house when she thought she saw them having sex.
That’s the real reason I wasn’t as upset that she slept with Marc, because by then I already knew for sure she wasn’t mine anymore. The crazy thing about it all is that I’m not even mad she didn’t choose me. Sad and heartbroken, without a doubt, but she loves one of the best people I’ve ever met in my life. How can I be angry about that?
Everything happens for a reason; I’ve always believed that and so has Kate. Once she can finally admit her feelings to me, we can talk strategy. Daniel is one of the most stubborn people I have ever met, and if I’m going to lose Kate because she’s in love with him, then he damn well better love her back. I know he does; he’s just closing himself off because he’s afraid to love her again and then lose her to me. Somehow, I’ve got to get them on the same page, but it’s not going to be easy now that Lucas is here. I haven’t quite figured out yet if Lucas is going to be what brings them together or what tears them apart for good. Either way, I’m here for them both.
I pull Kate’s body closer to mine and slowly drift off to sleep in the best way possible. With the only person in the world who loves me unconditionally wrapped in my arms. My best friend, and the mother of my daughter, Katherine Grace Moore.
Kate’s journey concludes, in Loving Kate, Book Three of The Acceptance Series coming March 2015
Keep reading for an excerpt from D. Kelly’s upcoming book,
Just an Illusion coming Spring/Summer 2015
PLAYLIST FOR RELEASING KATE
Blake Shelton – Mine Would be You
Chris Brown – New Flame
Ed Sheeran – Thinking Out Loud
Gavin Rossdale – Love Remains the Same
Iggy Azalea & Rita Ora – Black Widow
Jason Derulo – The Other Side
Keri Hilson – Energy
Lifehouse – Whatever It Takes
Sara Bareilles – Gravity
Taylor Swift – Blank Space
Taylor Swift – Shake it Off
Thank You
I can honestly say that I never thought I would be writing a thank you in any book, let alone my third book. The only reason I’m even able to write these pages is because you guys are here reading them. I hope with all my heart that if you are reading this page you can feel the heartfelt sincerity in it. Thank you to all the readers who are reading my stories and for being fans. I know it’s hard to trust a new author, especially when they write a series. Thank you for believing in me and trusting me to bring you to that HEA we all hope will come in the end.
Thank you to my friends, family, street team, and beta readers for supporting me. Thank you to my fellow authors and bloggers who continue to help out by not only spreading the word about my books, but my giving me such amazing advice on how to navigate my way through this indie world. Thank you for taking the time to read, promote, and review. Your job is far from easy but it is very much appreciated.
Thank you to my amazing editor who has stuck by me through all three books, even with all of my quirks. And a big thank you to my cover designer for the amazing images you create to grace the covers of my books. And a super huge thank you to my PA Ashley for keeping me sane and running things when I can’t.
Thank you all for being a part of my story and for taking this journey with me. Hugs and love to you all.
XoXo,
Dee
For those of you who have read my books I know many of you feel strongly about #TeamDaniel and #TeamMike. Your feedback, ratings, and reviews are very important to independent authors. Please leave a rating and consider leaving a review, I’d love to hear your thoughts.
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Excerpt from Just an Illusion
Book one of The Illusion Series
Please note all rights are reserved and Copyrighted © by D. Kelly
PROLOGUE
Stories are meant to be told. I firmly believe that or I wouldn’t be a writer. And yet, some stories should never be told for a variety of reasons. My story…OUR story…is on the border of both of those thoughts. When I first met them, it was quickly decided I would write their story. And that is a great story—the story I want to tell with all my heart and soul. The only problem is, in order to tell their story I have to tell mine, too, and I’m not sure I’m ready to share my story, yet.
Sighing, I take a look around for a moment and appreciate the silence at the end of the day. It’s funny how so many things can change over the course of a few years. I live in the lap of luxury, a beautiful beachfront house with every amenity I could have ever wanted. But at the end of the day, it’s just a house, and a house isn’t a home until you make it one.
His ultimatum tonight has prompted all of this reflection. He wants to make this a home for us, but he knows my heart may not completely be his.
Is it?
I would like to think so after all this time, but I’m not really sure. The only way to know for sure what I’m feeling is for me to write THE story. His, mine, theirs, and ours—it’s the only way.
I fire up my laptop and uncork a bottle of my favorite Pinot Grigio, filling the largest wine glass I own. It’s cool and warms me going down. It’s soothing and I know that in order to do this, I need something to calm me.
It’s just a story, Amelia, you write them all the time. It doesn’t have to be published; you’re just purging it from your system and getting it on paper. But if anyone ever got their hands on it…
Closing my eyes, I wage the internal battle with myself. He gave me a deadline; I have seventy-two hours to answer his proposal. Three days. I just don’t know if three days is long enough for my heart to catch up with my mind. It doesn’t matter, he’s serious this time. The boys left and went camping, giving me time to do this, to gather myself. It’s time to put on my big girl panties and give him an answer. Which leaves me one, and only one option.
It’s time to write our story.
CHAPTER ONE
“Amelia! Are you really wearing that to the BAD concert?”
Bastards and Dangerous, otherwise known as BAD, is playing tonight, and from what I hear they are all of the above. I’m not a fan. I’ve got eclectic tastes in music, but they’re just a little too loud for me. And since I’m not a fan, I don’t feel the need to wear the ‘I’m a groupie’ BAD shirt Belle had brought over for me. Instead, I’m wearing my best curve-hugging jeans, my favorite black converse, and a dark blue v-neck sweater. The concert is outdoors at the Greek and it’s been fifty degrees out all week which is unusually cold for Southern California. I’m not going to freeze so I can fit in with the crowd.
“Yes, Belle, this is exactly what I’m wearing. Don’t like it? I’ll happily let you give
my ticket to someone else,” I reply with a smug smile.
“No, it’s fine; you can come just like that. I just hope they’re not offended when they meet you and you’re not supporting them,” she says as she crosses her arms and pouts.
“I don’t know why you think we’re going to meet them; they are THE biggest band out there right now. And I highly doubt they’ll care that one person out of the millions they’ve met isn’t branded in something they make a commission off of.”
She rolls her eyes at me, “I’ve already told you it’s inevitable. We’ve got press seats, thanks to my kick ass job as music editor at Slam magazine, and VIP backstage passes so I can interview them.”
I laugh at her, I can’t help it. “Belle, I love you, but their manager said if they have time you can interview them. And you know as well as I do that bands don’t stick around the venue any longer than they have to. By the time we get backstage, they’ll be long gone.”
“Nope, that’s how it usually works but not tonight. Something big is coming down the pipeline; they’re getting ready to announce something. Everyone is talking about it. Slam is the biggest entertainment magazine out there right now and they want us there. They’ve never sent us backstage passes before. That’s why I took them instead of giving them to some rookie reporter. And that’s why I want you there, too; since you’re an author, you can help me craft an amazing story.”
“One book, Belle, I’ve got one book out. Using the word author is reaching a bit.”
“Amelia Greyson! Stop belittling yourself. You may only have one book out, but I know you have at least ten more on your computer you don’t think are good enough. Your one book has been number one on the New York Times Bestseller list for the last three weeks! That’s huge! That’s author status in its finest. You need to be proud of your accomplishment! I tell everyone I can about my best friend, the author. I’m so proud of you, Mel.”