WineBar: The Complete Story

by Alexis Angel

  So ya, my question back to Cynthia (with a smile and in a friendly way) would be like what often orgasms? I have had like zero MCO’s in the last seven days since getting back from Cancun. An MCO in case you didn’t know is a Man-Caused Orgasm. As opposed to a BCO, which is a Book Caused Orgasm.

  So like at this point with no man caused orgasm, I need to figure out if I want to see Jogger just bc I haven’t cum in a long time even if I’m not feeling him.

  You know what I think? Because I’m so indecisive.

  Survey time! Let’s make it part of our contest of the day! One lucky respondent will win a $5 Amazon gc!

  Should I call Jogger to come over and do him even if I'm not totally into him?

  NO!!!

  Girl, you need to cum! Hurry! Call him!

  Instead, go after WineBar

  Fuck WineBar!

  Tell me what I should do. I’ve come to rely on you guys for your suggestions A LOT!

  Hugs and kisses and lots of love,

  Alexis

  My Pledge

  36% of you said go call WineBar!

  Dude. The Team WineBar is strong in this group. But here are the total results:

  NO!! As in don't call Jogger if you're not feeling him was 41.4%

  Girl, cum as fast as you can and call him NOW! Was at 15.9%

  Instead, go after WineBar was at 36.1%

  Fuck WineBar! was at 6.6%

  Out of 20,000 people, about 10,000 voted. That means around 606 people really do not like WineBar.

  But few things I am doing.

  I am stopping myself from calling Jogger.

  I am going to return WineBar's call that he made earlier this morning. I'll wait till the early evening as I'm going out to call him, because a girl's busy, ya know?

  I am going to use like one of the many sex toys I have to bring myself to a earth shaking orgasm. Sure, dick is good, but BOB will keep me from missing him so I don't make any rash decisions and jump into bed with the first guy that comes calling.

  Tonight I'm going to this Portugese place with the girlfriends for dinner and drinks and we're going dancing afterwards. Just the girls.

  But what I wanted to talk to you about more was this. Yesterday I got a few emails from people. They were like OMG thank you for writing such and such book and I was like yay! Then they were like I also like the books at the end and I was like aww. But one person was like you know, I have a limited budget and sometimes I can't buy all the books I want so thank you for including yours in the back and it got me to thinking.

  I'm not writing books to make lots of money. I used to work on Wall Street and I still have a day job sorta so this is more because I'm passionate about doing it.

  One of the things that motivates me so much is making people happy or when someone tells me how much my story moved them.

  So I am going to take a few pledges now. Here and today. They are:

  1. I promise never to price my books higher than 99c and I will fight any price increase tooth and nail. I want all readers to be able to afford my books and I promise that if you can find a dollar you can find something on my catalog. No one should ever be deprived of a good story because it will break their budget. That's not the business I'm in.

  2. I promise to always make the reading an experience for you. It's not just about the one story. I will always seek to increase your customer satisfaction, or I like to call it your reading pleasure. I will do this by putting in a mixture of never before seen content as a thank you after the book, as well as old favorites. If you don't wanna read it because you still remember the story? That's fine, you don't have to. But if I can provide value to just one person who is able to forget their troubles for just one day and spend a day with Alexis Angel, then it will be worth it.

  This is my pledge to you as an author as long as I publish in Kindle Unlimited.

  Hugs and kisses and lots of love,

  Alexis

  Happy Daddy Day! LOL

  Yeah, because it's Father's Day!

  Lol! Like I have a father I'm going to see. I don't have a Daddy like in books where a girl has a daddy because I think he wouldn't be able to handle me.

  But one man who will most def always be able to handle me is my Dad. He's like always helping me do stuff, even when he has no idea. Like this time around, he's gonna help me with some tax stuff that my business partner was going to do but got caught up with other stuff to do.

  So nice welcome change from WineBar (who I am talking to on Monday over dinner we decided) and all the rest of my Harem and hang out with the parental units.

  But I was reading through some Getting Caught Experiences and I figured why not give out a few books? So, if your story is on here, please reply back and I'll have a surprise book for you!

  So, lets see, Rachel writes:

  Me and my husband were dating while we were deployed in Saudi during Desert Storm. We were going at it out in the desert when I noticed a helicopter over us. I mentioned it he said some general was filming our site for training film. I told him that I hope they edit his white ass out of it. Moral of story always remember when high ranking officers are going to be around. Luckily they could not see our faces to know what our names were.

  Haha! Funny. Or I liked this one from Marty which was hilarious!

  My first husband and I were totally engrossed. In stroking when I felt a hand on my thigh. Our three year old daughter had gotten up and wandered into our room. Gently directed her back to bed, but that ended sex that night!

  And this one OMG from Misty!

  We were living together and it was about three months after I had our first daughter. He had been out of town and I went to the airport to pick him up. He'd been gone for about a week and his mom was at our house watching our daughter. We thought hey we need to have sex before we go home to our daughter. So he pulls off the road somewhere and we get naked and I'm sitting on top of him going at him pretty hard. We both get to cum and just then the whole back window is flooded with light. I freak out and jump off of him trying to grab my clothes and throw them on. My boyfriend casually lays his pants over his lap just a a cop knocks on his window. He rolls down the window and the cops like "so what's going on here?". My boyfriend is like " oh nothing officer my girlfriend and I were just trying to get some alone time before we head home to our daughter, because I've been out of town for a while". The cop is like "you mean you live together and you're out here having sex in your car" and he kinda chuckles as he says it. So my boyfriend is like "well like I said I've been out of town and I couldn't wait until we got home and with a baby at home you never know when you'll get a chance to get some, you know what I mean" and he chuckles and winks at the cop. The cop says "well this is not the place for that and you guys should head on home" and as he's getting ready to walk away my boyfriend says "oh we just finished when you got here so we were fixing to head home anyway". The cop looks at me and smirks and says "well enjoy the rest of your evening" and walks away. I was so totally embarrassed and my boyfriend is just laughing his ass off.

  Hugs and kisses and lots of love,

  Alexis

  Cindersmellya

  OMG So funny!

  So I was totally getting the Alexis Angel press conference ready when I was talking to my really good friend, who I’m gonna call HotChik. We haven’t talked in a while and like recently started to talk again and she was like oh what are you doing and I was like its pretty hot and asked her what are you doing and she was all like nothing I’m just sending some things to this guy. So like I know this guy and I’m like omg HotChik, you totally like him. And she’s like no, omg. And so she like knows what I do for work and about how I write romance so I decide to tease her and I’m like omg I am so gonna write a book about like this girl who sends this guy stuff because she can’t tell him.

  So she’s like what kinda story. And so I figure something like the following.

  So like maybe a office romance where this girl works for this guy. And maybe
he’s like a famous. Anyways, so she chats to him online and they get to know each other’s personality and he falls in love with her and she falls in love with him but she can’t tell him because she works for him. So instead she and him have cybersex and she cums and then sends him her thong that she came in. And so he smells them because he doesn’t know where she is but then for whatever reason she can’t talk to him online anymore so he needs to find her. So he has like some sort of contest where women send him their thongs but he can’t find the girl. But this girl is helping him and in trying to find the girl he and her fall in love but he can’t do her because he wants thong girl. But when they finally do do it he’s like I know that smell and they live HEA.

  So HotChik was all like no way I wouldn’t read that. Would you?

  Would you read about the thong smelling billionaire? LOL

  NO!!

  Yes!!!

  Who are you again??

  I'm smelling my thong right now!

  Hugs and kisses and lots of love,

  Alexis

  Misbehavior

  So I'm supposed to behave when visiting the folks, right? Not so...

  So I came down to visit my parents for Father’s Day. I came down on a Saturday. You remember, because we’re gonna do the press conference on Sunday right, but I couldn’t. So something funny happened on Sunday that I was telling my naughty angels about.

  So first off, it was like scorching hot here – like 108 degrees or something crazy. Not a cloud in the sky. So what do I do? After Fathers Day brunch I put on my teeny tiniest bikini and go out by the pool. I mean, its just my parents around so I’m not worried about stares but they’re also out of the house. And I remember WorkMom and what she always lectures me about so I took some sunscreen.

  So we have a big backyard and it has a pool but like its still in a neighborhood and there is two story houses adjoining ours. Think regular suburbia. So like I remember when I was in high school one of my parents friends in the neighborhood would always look out his window to his home office whenever me or my girlfriends were next to the pool between senior year and college.

  At the time, I gotta be honest, I was sorta creeped out. But he’s harmless and he’s actually a pillar in the community. Like puts on the block party and organizes the neighborhood Christmas Carolers and then the 10k we do every year and stuff. Anyways, so he’s got 3 kids and a wife and he works from home and he used to always always stare at us. A couple times we used to wave and he used to wave back.

  So I’m lying next to my pool on Sunday and all of a sudden I think of him and I look over.

  But he’s not there.

  I gotta be honest, I kinda missed him. But the sun is bearing down STRONG and this is such a good opportunity with the parental units out of the house so some quick tugs and my boobs are free and I no longer have to worry about tan lines!

  So I’m reading and enjoying the sun when all of a sudden I see a bit of movement.

  And yep, there is Mr. Neighbor. Staring at me. It’s been 12 years and he’s back. And he’s staring at me topless.

  And somehow, I don’t seem to mind. Maybe it’s like a secret between the two of us. I mean, the guy and his wife know and interact socially with my parents. It was kind of a thrill. There I was, my boobs all tingly with the sun, bared out to this guy that I’d known growing up lol.

  So, there’s something I wanted to do on Sunday. And I did it today. What is it? I can’t tell just now because this NL is already long enough. We’re gonna have to wait till tomorrow.

  Hugs and kisses and lots of love,

  Alexis

  Mom

  So a lil' bit about what's going on with me...

  So I’m back in SF to grab some things. I’m heading down to stay with my parents for a few weeks but I’ll be back and forth between there and here a lot for the summer it looks like. It’s nothing about guys, just my mom is probably gonna need to have a pacemaker put into her sometime. After Father’s Day, I stayed around an extra day (I mean, I used the second day to hang out by the pool, give Mr. Neighbor a better look, and get him to sorta participate in the peeping lol – but that’s a story for later) but for like the last month my Mom was saying that she get out of breath easily so yesterday I took her to the doctor in the afternoon. In the morning parents went to brunch at the country club they’re part of and that’s when I did my poolside shenanigans but then I took her to the doctor and apparently the doctor thinks that one side of her heart isn’t conducting electricity or something. So to fix it, they need to insert a pacemaker. Like, she’s had valve replacement surgery before and this pacemaker thing is apparently a 1 to 2 hour procedure and it actually increases life expectancy, but still, I’m kinda wanting to be close to her, ya know?

  So I am gonna see WineBar later on tonight and then I'll be back down to my parent's tomorrow.

  So, basically, I’ll be traveling back and forth between SF and my parents house. It’s not a big deal. Like only about 2 and half hours if you drive at 60, and I usually drive at 80.

  Today though I took the train and it drops me off right at the BART station and that takes me like one block from my condo. But the train ride was sooo productive!

  I got the Press Release questions all sorted! If you haven’t sent in any, here’s your chance. You can enter as many times as you want! Winners get free books from my catalog lol!

  Hugs and kisses and lots of love,

  Alexis

  Prayer?

  So this is pretty crazy!

  So first off, thank you everyone for your comments yesterday. Especially those who were like oh a pacemaker is no big deal. I’ve had one since like five years ago and I have such a better quality of life. That was a few people. A larger number of people were like dude I’ll keep your mom and your family in my thoughts and prayers.

  This is crazy. So, the whole thing went down on Monday where the doctor initially said hey you might need a pacemaker to my mom. Then he ordered an echocardiogram the next day. So yesterday, she did the echo. I came to SF because my dad took her and the doctor took a look at it at the end of the day. So he gives her a call and he says, hold up, we may not need the pace maker. You may just need to get off beta blockers and other medicine which keeps your blood pressure low because that seems to be lowering your heart rate. But you may not have a heart block.

  Which means no pacemaker for now? So instead, he said looks like you may not need so many blood pressure medicines.

  Which is crazy. This is like the power of prayer and good thoughts. Honestly, I know some ppl were probably like dude why do you write about stuff that close to you on your author NL but like I mean I just sent it to 20,000 ppl. If say 10K ppl opened it and 5,000 people said one prayer then maybe it was enough for something good to happen. I dunno, I’m just a happy camper and so was my mom when we FaceTime’d and she told me.

  But like any mom, she’s not willing to let me get out of staying at home for a couple weeks like I had originally planned. So I am headed back home.

  All you #TeamWineBar fans, I was in such a good mood yesterday that I went the distance with him last night. Three times. We also talked a bit. We’re gonna take things slow. Let things develop. We may still see other people, but we’ll be open if something develops between us.

  Life is good. I’m off to go spend summer with the folks for a few weeks. Hang out by the pool. Tempt the neighbor. Seriously, I feel like such a Lolita after what I did to Mr. Neighbor the other day. I never really told you what he ended up seeing and doing that Monday. I just called it “poolside shenanigans”. I didn’t say anything because you know, like my mom.

  But the immediacy of the issue with her is past, and I’m back to my crazy sexy self.

  Hugs and kisses and lots of love,

  Alexis

  With Parents

  My love life staying with my parents should be a book...SEAL'd Up.

  As in my legs are sealed up. As in not spread. As in I might as well be living in a nun p
lace. Like a convent.

  Because I got back yesterday and today Dad cooked breakfast. Then we did some gardening. Then my mom spent an hour doing Mom things like lecturing me that I should get married soon. And then when I was like ya I think I'm going out tomorrow she's like be careful I don't want you getting a reputation as coming back into town and living all big city crazy.

  Sigh. They're my parents and I love them, but I dunno how much longer I can make it. And today is only the first day! Although ready made blueberry pancakes in the morning are a plus! But then I know that the only time I'm gonna get some is like in secret. This summer is gonna be like high school all over again!

  Time to hand out some free books! We are going to go with some Caught Doing It Stories!