No Man's Land

by Jacqueline Druga

  “What? I’m sorry. I’m trying to calm him. He won’t…”

  “You can’t stay. You must leave. I’m sorry, take him and go.” He turned.

  “Wait. Why?”

  “This is a quiet place. We can’t take a chance of the Formers hearing and trying…”

  “You have a fence.”

  “It won’t hold if too many show up. I’m sorry. We don’t want you here.”

  “Whatever happened to all are welcome in God’s house?”

  Pastor Jim wouldn’t even turn around. “Don’t make us take you out. It would be best if you left through the back door.”

  He couldn’t even look at me. Of course not, he was sending an innocent baby out into the madness. I felt horrible for my son. To be so young and not be wanted.

  It wasn’t going to be long before the sun would start to set. I hurried and grabbed my things and left, as requested, through the back door. I didn’t have time to beg or argue. I had to take Edward, get back on the road, and find shelter before nightfall.

  11

  Oust

  It would actually be quite comical if it wasn’t so pathetic and sad, how Leah kept following us and coming back like some sort of stray cat. It was hilarious if she knew. There was no way, no how, she did. It had to be instinct.

  I let her in the car. About the twenty-mile mark, as it often did, Highway 119 transformed into a two-lane road to pass through a small town. This one consisted of a car repair shop and a volunteer fire department. Just as we hit the edge of town, I saw the property of Berchum Mills. Or I guessed it was his.

  A long sloped driveway from the road led up to a two-story frame house and a barn.

  I could see people moving around on the property, at least I hoped they were people. Before we were spotted, I hid and locked the car and forced Leah out.

  “Go, Leah, just go. I have to get Edward safe. Go,” I told her then took off with Edward down the road.

  Not only was Edward a newborn, I knew he wasn’t doing well. He wasn’t taking his bottle and if it didn’t come back out of his mouth, it went right through him. More than ever I had to get him to Sanctuary City, at least for medical help.

  Stopping wasn’t an option, it was a must. It was getting dark.

  My backpack was still full of supplies and bartering items. I made it to the driveway with ease, checking once to make sure Leah didn’t follow. Half way up, a truck blocked the driveway and a man stood outside of it.

  “Stop,” he instructed. “What do you want?”

  “I was told this was a safe place to stop for the night. I need to rest.”

  “That a baby?” he asked.

  I nodded. “My son. He’s two days old.”

  “I’ll let you through. I don’t think Mr. Mills is going to let you stay though.”

  “Why not?”

  “They make noise. At night, sound travels. May not look it, but there are a lot of those things around.”

  “Can I ask him?” I asked. “I mean, let me talk to him.”

  The man lifted a walkie-talkie to his mouth. “Hey, got a guy here. Needs a place to stay. He wants to talk to you. He has a baby.”

  There was a hiss of static. Then, “Send him up. I’ll meet him at the gate.”

  “You heard,” the man said. “Head straight up. He’ll be the big guy waiting up there.”

  “Thank you. Thank you so much,” I said.

  “Don’t thank me. I’m just filtering people.”

  I understood and made my way up the driveway.

  Sure enough, a big guy stood there. He wore a green baseball cap and a checkered shirt. He opened the fence and stepped out to greet me.

  “Mr. Mills?” I asked.

  “Yep.” He lifted his chin. “How old is that baby?”

  “Two days.”

  “I see.”

  “We’re trying to get to Sanctuary Sixteen and—”

  “He’s not crying.”

  “He’s sleeping.”

  “A newborn?” he asked, then stepped forward and peeked at Edward.

  “See.”

  “I do. You can’t stay here.”

  “We won’t be any trouble. I know—”

  “Son, there shouldn’t be a baby in this godforsaken world, you know that.”

  “He’s my child. My wife died giving birth to him. What was I supposed to do, just leave him?”

  “I hear you, but people in your same situation made a humane choice.”

  “I know what you’re saying. What you’re implying. Humane. Why make him live in this world? What kind of life can he have?”

  “Jesus, that is—”

  “I have to try. I do,” I interrupted him and pleaded. “For my wife. For… Edward. That’s his name. I have to try.”

  “I can’t let you in here. I have people that live here, waiting this thing out. We’re safe here. We don’t need the infected to make their way in. Our perimeters aren’t that strong.”

  I looked over his shoulder to the people there. Tents were erected, there were men and women. I even spotted a young girl. They all watched me talking to him.

  “Please. I’ll leave at first light. I promise.”

  Mr. Mills looked at me and sighed out heavily. “The barn is not in the fenced area, but it will give you shelter.”

  “Thank you.”

  “Look. I can’t make promises. If there is a lot of crying, screaming… I can’t promise what people might do. Any noise is a risk.”

  “I understand. Thank you again for at least giving me a chance.”

  He pointed to the barn and I walked toward it. It never once dawned on me that people would see an innocent baby as such a risk. Maybe I would feel the same if I were in their position.

  I vowed right then and there, it was the last time I’d beg someone for a place to stay and be safe. If I had to stop again before Sanctuary City, I would handle things myself. Find my own shelter. I didn’t want to be in the position where someone would turn me and my son away and make us feel less than human.

  <><><><>

  I never expected to be in that position. Leah was supposed to be there, be the one to help me with the baby when he became out of control. I even thought about that video I saw, the magic baby cure to silence any baby.

  It didn’t work.

  It was unbearable and frustrating, as the night moved in, his whimpers and screams seemed louder.

  There was no doubt, even though we were in that barn, all noises echoed across the land of Mr. Mills.

  To add to it all, every few minutes, I’d hear a whispering voice. Not a soft soothing voice, but angry.

  “Shut it up.”

  “Silence it, or I will!”

  I sat on the ground, rocking him back and forth, my only light was one of those little circle battery operated jobs. What was wrong with him? Was he hungry? Cold? Sick?

  “Please, Ed, please be quiet. Please.”

  “We’re warning you.”

  Suddenly I was overcome with this horrendous fear for myself and my child. There were more voices yelling at me and Edward screamed louder.

  “Shh. Shh.” I stared at him, my body trembling. I tried putting a bottle in his mouth, he didn’t want it. I didn’t know what to do.

  I found my hand covering his mouth, muffling his noise. Then as my blood pressure rose and heart pounded faster, my hand pressed tighter covering his mouth and nose.

  He struggled, and I just kept it there.

  Oh my God. What was I doing? Was I killing my own child because I was scared of the others outside? What was wrong with me?

  I lifted my hand at the same time the barn door flew open with a bang.

  It was hard to see who was there. I saw four figures.

  “You were warned,” the one voice said.

  “No. I’ll keep him quiet.” I stumbled to a stand and backed up.

  The four of them rushed at me.

  I moved quickly, but someone stepped on the light, making the barn compl
etely dark. I could see a hint of light from outside the barn doors and aimed that way. When I did, I felt the strike to my face. Was it a fist? The hit sent me flying back. I clutched Edward as tight as I could and caught my balance before I hit the ground.

  Again, I tried to run, but the barn doors shut and it was all black. My eyes didn’t have time to adjust when I felt Edward ripped from my arms. His cries continued and faded.

  “No!” I cried out. “No!”

  My scream was quickly silenced when I felt the object slam into my gut, knocking the wind from me.

  All I could think about was my son, my poor son. I couldn’t even hear him anymore. I landed hard to the ground and the blows started one by one. A strike to my gut, my legs, my head. They only stopped when one of them grabbed me, pulled me by my shirt and dragged me for the longest time. I was pulled from the smooth hay covered floor of the barn to outside. The rough terrain scraped painfully against my body. When they finally tossed me aside, the pummeling began again.

  It didn’t matter though. I closed my eyes and waited for death. What was the point of fighting? I failed. Edward was gone.

  12

  Saving Grace

  September 5

  When I opened my eyes, all I could see was the crushed fallen leaves. It was light out and I was on my stomach. A simple movement of my hand shot a danger of pain through my entire body. My eyesight was blurred and my lips were so swollen they were tight. I attempted to run my tongue over my teeth, but when I did, I felt them resting in my mouth. It took a lot, but I lifted my head and spat. A blood clot emerged, followed by a long strand of blood-filled saliva, along with several teeth.

  It was hard to pinpoint where I hurt, because everything hurt.

  Then reality hit me.

  Edward. Where was he?

  A saddened and aching moan seeped from me as I clutched the ground in an attempt to stand. My legs buckled and I fell back to the ground.

  Oh, God, no. Not my son.

  I had to get it together, think of him and not myself.

  I cringed and grunted to regain my stand and fought my hurt and wobbling legs. I wondered if maybe I was dead. Maybe I had turned into one of them. I glanced down to my hand; it trembled and then, just to make sure, I tried to speak.

  “Edward,” I said softly. Then I closed my eyes tight. The emotional pain was more than the physical. If I did anything, I had to find my son.

  I didn’t even know where I was. I was surrounded by trees. No matter where I looked, I couldn’t see anything but those trees.

  I held up my wrist to see my watch. It was hard to focus and I knew that the time of eleven twelve wasn’t nighttime. My God, I had been unconscious for twelve hours.

  If I did find Edward, chances were there’d be nothing left.

  The loss of leaves allowed me to look at the sky. We were headed south and I looked for the sun to get my direction. I headed to where I believed was south. Every step I took hurt, but I kept going.

  About twenty feet into my walk, I saw blood and the leaves were pressed and scattered. The muddy ground had footprints, lots of them. Peering around, I saw a trail. I wasn’t a tracker, and didn’t need to be one to know that was where they dragged me.

  My best recourse was to follow that dragging trail and go back to the barn, that’s where they took Edward from me. As I staggered, my chest felt heavy and I could hear my own wheezing breath. My head throbbed and burned. I reached up to feel a huge gash. It was still damp and when I looked down, my shirt was saturated with blood. I was hurt in so many places, I was probably dying.

  Fueled by emotions and determination, I kept going, stumbling, getting back up. I knew they dragged me for a long time, I just didn’t realize how far.

  The trees thinned out as I entered more of a clearing. I tripped over the uneven ground and toppled back down again. I rolled over and got to all fours. It was when I started to stand that I saw it.

  I was headed south and it was back in the trees, far off the path I was taking.

  It may have been far, my eyesight was blurry, but there was no denying that Edward’s infant carrier hung from a branch by the shoulder strap.

  My adrenaline shot up and I moved with more of a rush to get to that carrier. I was fueled, I didn’t even notice the pain anymore. My mind cried, No No No as I made it to the tree.

  I lifted my arm to grab the carrier and my entire side felt aflame. I took a deep breath, grabbed on to the end of it and pulled. With grunts of pain and all my strength, I managed to free it and the carrier fell.

  I caught it before it hit the ground.

  It was empty.

  My beating heart sunk to my stomach as I dropped to my knees.

  The strap had a bloody handprint on it and I brought the carrier to my face.

  At first, I whimpered the agony of my loss, then with my head arched back, holding that carrier, I cried out deep and long. One gut wrenching cry of sorrow. I didn’t care who heard me. In fact, I wanted them to.

  I wanted to die. Maybe if I were lucky the Vee would come. If they didn’t, I’d find my way to the road and wait for them to come.

  Allow the Vee to consume my body and my pain.

  Why live?

  I took a few deep breaths, inhaled again to scream but didn’t.

  A young girl stood on a slight crest about twenty feet from me, holding a baby blanket.

  I stood up.

  She brought her index finger to her mouth as if to signal me to be quiet, then she turned and disappeared over the grade.

  I wanted to call out, “Wait” but she needed me not to make a noise, and believing she had found my dead son, I followed her.

  When I arrived where she had stood, I looked down. She was at the bottom of a hill. I could tell by the way she held the blanket she was holding a baby.

  More than likely, Edward.

  I slid down that small hill more so than walked, and tripped my way to her.

  She had a young face, that of someone that wasn’t even a teenager, but she was tall. Her long dark blonde hair was pulled into a messy ponytail. Her face was dirty and her hands… bloody.

  To me, she was far too young to blame for Edward’s death. More than likely she was walking and found him. I remembered seeing her when I arrived at the gate to Mr. Mills’ home.

  At least, I’d hold Edward one more time.

  I reached out for the blanket. When my fingers touched him, his bare arm shot out of the blanket and his fingers curled.

  I gasped.

  He was moving? Edward was moving? I grabbed the blanket with him and he squirmed in my arms. I opened the blanket to see my naked son and his legs kicked.

  “How?” I covered Edward and held him close to my body. I tried not to cry, I couldn’t even form a sentence. “How? I thought…”

  “I heard them talking last night. Planning.” Her voice quivered. “How they were going to kill you and take your stuff. I couldn’t… it was a baby.”

  “You were there?”

  She nodded. “I grabbed him from you and ran.”

  I closed my eyes. “Thank you.”

  “I had to take his sleeper off,” she said. “I covered it with blood. Your blood and told them, I crushed his skull. I hid him here and then came back.”

  Edward fussed and moved a little, but that was it. I didn’t see any injuries.

  “He’s quiet,” I said.

  “I… I fed him for you.”

  My shoulders bounced and I fought back the tears. “I can’t thank you enough.” I fumbled placing the carrier over my shoulder. In fact, I could barely lift my shoulder. I hated not holding Edward, but I had to move. “I have to go. Get him dressed.”

  “They took all your stuff. I went to the barn, all that was there was a bottle.”

  “That’s fine.” I turned left to right. “Do you know which way to get to the road?”

  “There’s a stream over the next hill.” She pointed in that direction. “Cross it and keep going straight
. You’ll see it.”

  “Thank you.” I started to walk.

  “They took your stuff.”

  I reached for my front pocket, and felt my keys. I had moved them there because they hurt to sit on. “Not everything.” If it didn’t hurt to smile, I would have.

  It was time to move forward, follow her direction.

  “Mister,” she called me. “You’re headed to Sanctuary City, right?”

  “One of them, yes.”

  “Can I come with you?”

  I stopped walking. “No, that’s not a good idea. You should go back there.”

  “But you’re hurt,” she said.

  “I’ll be fine.” I started walking again.

  “You should stop at the creek to wash your cuts.”

  “I’m fine.”

  “I can help you.”

  Again, I stopped. “I said I’d be fine.”

  “You don’t look fine. You’re all beat up and bleeding still.”

  I kept walking.

  “I can be a big help. I know this area really good.”

  “You should stay back. Go now, before you’re missed,” I said.

  “No one’s gonna miss me. They ain’t all that good there. The people I mean. They’re getting worse waiting on the transport guy. I’m… I’m afraid.”

  “Somehow I doubt that.”

  “I saved Edward!” she shouted.

  I spun around. “How did you know his name?”

  “I heard you tell Mr. Mills. I saved him. I stopped them men from crushing him. Don’t that mean anything? I don’t want to go back there.”

  “How do you know I’m all that good?”

  “Because you ain’t killed her yet.” She extended her arm and swung out a point to her left.

  My shoulders dropped.

  Leah was standing there.

  13

  Partner

  Her name was Hannah and she had this innocent yet intelligent air about her. She carried a Barbie backpack, even though she seemed too old for one. I don’t know what all she had in there, it was packed to the gills.

  At the creek, she pulled out a sock for me to use as a cloth.