Chaos (Kardia Chronicles) (Entangled Teen)

by Christine O'Neil

  But you won’t forget about them, I reminded myself. And who was I kidding? I needed to know. Who I was, where I came from, what Mac was. I needed to know all of it, and the next four weeks were my only chance to find the answers.

  I forced myself to sound casual and called down the hallway to my mom and grandmother, who were attempting to make a quilt together by the fireplace in the living room. “Going to meet Libby at the coffee shop.”

  I shut the door behind me and winced. It was almost like Mother Nature was playing a bad joke on me. If yesterday had been your standard New Hampshire ass-clenchingly cold day, today the sadistic bitch had ramped it up to snot-freezingly frigid.

  I tugged my black scarf up high enough to cover the bottom half of my face and trekked down the walkway and across the street. It only took me a few minutes to make the trip to our meeting spot, but by the time I got there, I was cursing myself for skipping the long johns and turtleneck. I refused to let Mac think he was the reason for the increase in fabric, though, and even the scarf had been a last-minute addition. Talk about freezing your ass off to spite your nemesis.

  When I got to the house and made my way to the back, he was already there, sitting on the dilapidated deck stairs. He looked up with a mocking half smile and a sizzle went through me. Nerves, I reassured myself. It was just nerves because right now he had my future in his hands.

  “Nice scarf,” he said, standing as I approached. He didn’t look cold at all. In fact, even with only his tan canvas jacket and no gloves or hat, he looked downright toasty. Fucker.

  I ignored that and eyed him suspiciously. “Are you some sort of were-critter?”

  His dark brows collapsed into a frown. “What?”

  “You know, like Jacob from Twilight.” I could feel my cheeks getting warm under the weight of his incredulous stare. “He was always really hot.”

  Mac grinned reluctantly then. “I’m flattered that you find me attractive, Magpie, but I’m sort of seeing someone, and I’m not down t—”

  I clapped my hand over my mouth and shook my head furiously, tamping down my mortification and the annoyance that came along with his reminder of Ella. “Ugh, ew, no. I meant like hot hot. Not…” I gestured up and down his body with a terse flip of my hand. “Hot.”

  His relaxed stance and unwavering smile clued me in that he was just messing with me. Hell if that wasn’t getting old. And his total lack of offense at my protest-too-much “ew” made it even clearer that he pretty much didn’t see me as a girl he wanted to impress at all.

  Ouch again.

  “Whatever. Stop screwing around and answer the question. Are you?”

  “Am I a werewolf?” He shook his head and sat back down, jerking his head toward the space next to him. I sat, and he turned to face me. Although I’d left a few feet between us, I could still make out the black flecks in the fathomless gray of his eyes.

  “No, thank gods. I’m not a big fan of wolves in general. And anyway, werewolves aren’t real. You know that, right?”

  I didn’t know that. Not for sure, but I nodded anyway, relieved that at least I didn’t have that to deal with.

  He didn’t look convinced. “All that stuff, vampires, sirens, gargoyles, it’s all legends based on tales of different semis, and people have just mashed them together over the years. We aren’t monsters from the movies. We’re descendants of gods. Some of us have powers similar to mythical creatures, but we each have a direct connection to our origin deity as far as what we’re capable of. Understand?”

  I nodded again, starting to feel like both an idiot and a marionette, but I was happy to just listen to him talk. He knew things. He had answers. Answers I’d been denied since I’d started to change, and I was afraid if I spoke, he’d stop talking.

  “I could tell when I met your mother and grandmother that they were suppressing their powers. How long has that been going on?”

  “A long time. Ten years maybe?”

  He seemed to take a while to digest that but finally nodded. “They really didn’t tell you anything about what’s happening and our history, did they?”

  This time I shook my head, glad for the opportunity to change it up a little, but his frown was so fierce, I wished I could take it back.

  “I don’t get that at all. How are you supposed to—” He bit off a curse and jammed a hand into his wavy hair. Funny how the more he was around me, the more he seemed to do that and the less perfect his ’do was looking. That gave me a twisted sense of satisfaction. At least I wasn’t the only one in knots. It took him a second, but he seemed to settle. “Let’s start with a little demo, then we’ll come back ’round and I’ll explain some things about our kind, all right?”

  “A demo?”

  A challenge lit his eyes, and I shook my head. “I don’t—”

  He pulled me to my feet, took my gloved hand in his bare one, and squeezed. “Let it go, full throttle.”

  I laughed. “Yeah, right.” My chuckles died when I saw the dead-serious light in his eye. I jerked my arm back, but he didn’t let go.

  “Look, that little trick I did a few nights ago in the car? That’s not what we’re talking about here, okay? I could leave you like a giant, drooling baby without a single happy thought left in your head in ten seconds flat and it would kill you,” I protested, trying again to pull from his grasp before panic took hold.

  Mac looked wholly unimpressed. “Do it.”

  Was this the death-wish thing I’d been wondering about? Did he really think he could withstand the whole enchilada? I was so caught up in psychoanalyzing him, I didn’t see it coming. He yanked my arm and slammed me against his hard body.

  “Do it, Mags.” His eyes blazed. “Don’t hold back.”

  Anger was pretty much my go-to emotion, and I didn’t appreciate him manhandling me, so it was no surprise when it reared up and took control of my mouth.

  “You first. Unless you’re chicken.”

  I regretted the words the second I uttered them, but before I could pull a take-backsies, he came at me, swooping down, eyes filled with menace. I seriously didn’t know whether he was going to kiss me or tear open my jugular, and the uncertainty sent me struggling for real now. Fury raced through me, but hot on its heels was something else. Something a little yummy and a lot terrifying, and I twisted hard to get free. He wouldn’t have it. He pinned my arms behind my back and held me tighter, closer to his big, hard body, his fingers digging into my hips.

  Oh, hell no. Yummy dropped to the wayside and hot anger tinged with fear blasted from every pore. Was this what this whole thing had been about? Or was this just a ploy to get me to—

  His free hand slid down to cover my ass, and that was that. The vision of Eric was still fresh, and I guess that was a good thing because I didn’t deserve to forget, but I couldn’t hold it in any longer.

  The power burst through my skin like molten lava from an ancient volcano. Even at that, though, there was a part of me that kept one foot on the brake. A part of me that knew, on some bone-deep level, that Mac would never hurt me for real.

  I stared at him, waiting to see his face go pale…waiting to hear his breath shudder as it seeped into his skin, my want, my need for the love inside him pulling at his soul like a ravenous beast. Waiting to see if I could make it stop in time once it started. But he just looked at me, his deep gray eyes fathomless as the Atlantic Ocean. I let up the brake a little more. Still nothing. And on it went, until I was throwing so much energy at him, I barely had enough to stay on my feet. I was too tired to even care that he still had a handful of my ass and I was hanging onto him like a cat on a scratching post.

  “What is this? What are you?” I whispered, the last bit of fight draining out of me. I slumped against him and he relaxed his grip slowly, thankfully giving me time to get my legs under me again.

  “I’m the answer to your prayers, Magpie. The only guy in the world you can’t kill, even if you wanted to. So maybe you should try being a little nicer to me,” he mur
mured, chucking my chin with his fist.

  He tried to play it off, but even in my weakened state, I could tell our interaction had affected him. Lines bracketed his mouth and his own hands were a little shaky. He could hold me off, but it cost him something.

  “I think that’s enough of the physical stuff for your first day.” He started for the front yard toward his car and waved for me to join him. “I just wanted to get a feel for where you were at. I know you have questions and I have things I want to go over with you. No point in doing that out in the cold.”

  Fine by me. My legs were still weak and trembling, but I managed to follow him out to the road where we’d parked. I settled into the passenger’s seat, burrowing into the warm velour and trying to make sense of it all, but some of it still wasn’t gelling.

  “So are you like some kind of bizarro semi? You don’t have powers but you can’t be affected by powers, either?”

  “Bizarro? You read too many comic books,” he said with a half-smile. “There are semis like that, though. They descend from the goddess Wadjet. Not me, though.”

  I ran through my mythology quickly and shook my head. “I’ve never heard of Wadjet.”

  “She’s the Egyptian goddess of childbirth and children. Her descendants have defensive powers only.”

  “So were all the gods real? From every culture?” The thought was mind-blowing. There were hundreds, maybe even thousands, then.

  Mac shifted and turned to face me, his eyes squinting thoughtfully. “No, not exactly. If you look at the cultures around the world, a lot of them are the same. Zeus, Jupiter, Odin, Indra…the details are all sketchy and a lot of times flat-out wrong, but at the heart of most mythology is the core truth. There are gods and goddesses for everything from love to war. No one culture was totally wrong or totally right. Just like with the semis, we assign names to them that everyone can understand, but they embody parts of a lot of different cultures’ mythologies. The god or goddess chooses what want to be called or the name that they most identify with.”

  Fascinating. I had known I was a semi for a while, but after having all talk of this kind of stuff forbidden at home, a part of me felt like a kid in a candy shop and another part felt like I’d hopped a bus to crazy town.

  But Mac didn’t look crazy.

  “That’s the simplified version of it, but that explanation works well enough for our purposes.”

  “So, aside from being able to defend against kardia Aphrodite, what can you do?”

  He pursed his lips and shook his head. “This is why it’s better to talk in riddles. I know you want answers, but there are things I’m not supposed to get into with you. Things I’ve already said that I shouldn’t have. Ours is supposed to be a…one-sided relationship.”

  “Nice. You just get to roll in, threaten me, make the rules, and I’m not supposed to ask any questions?”

  He didn’t have to answer. I could tell by the way he crossed his arms over his muscled chest that I’d hit it right.

  “So where are you parents? Do they have to live here too while you watch me?”

  His face went carefully blank and he shook his head. “No. I’ve been taking care of myself since I was thirteen. We start working very young.”

  Sympathy welled up inside me for all the things he wasn’t saying. I wanted to know more, but he’d crossed his muscular arms over his chest and I knew I’d have to fight that battle another day.

  “But whatever you are, you’re what? Totally and completely impervious to my power?” Another thought occurred to me as I took in his spring-weight jacket and gloveless hands. “And weather.”

  He turned and raised an eyebrow at me like, Now you got it.

  So it was no bullshit, I realized, a little lightheaded at the thought. There was actually a person alive that I couldn’t hurt or kill just by touching him on a rough day. While that was a given for most teenage girls, it was a mind-blowing relief for me. I pressed him again, fascinated and shaky with excitement. “Can you feel hot and cold? Are you bulletproof? Invincible? Or is it just my kind of freak that doesn’t affect you?”

  He held up a hand to slow me down. “I can feel temperature; it just doesn’t bother me one way or the other. And I’m not sure if I can deflect all powers because the dilution of bloodlines and mixing of the different semis makes each of us a little different. I know that I haven’t met a touch power yet that I couldn’t deflect. That said, if I was unaware and you could hit me with a brain blast without any warning, I’d probably be screwed. I’m definitely not invincible, but I haven’t met many semis who could hurt me.”

  I nodded, pretended to digest that nugget, but really, my gullet was chock full and I was long past digesting anything else. This was going to take a day—or seventy—to sink in.

  Up until a few days ago, I thought I was the only semi at Crestwood and, other than Mom and Gram, probably the only one in New Hampshire, so just Mac’s admission that he was one of us had been a lot to take. Finding out he was here because of me and that he could withstand my power? I’d had to file that under stuff I couldn’t even think about until I was armed with a carton of Thin Mints and a box of tissues.

  Bottom line? I wasn’t alone.

  Mac put on his seat belt and gestured for me to do the same, then pulled away from the curb. We drove in silence as I tried to get my shit together. When we pulled into my driveway a minute later, he turned to face me.

  “If we’re going to keep going, I need you to make me a few promises.” He was solemn as could be, and I knew there would be no negotiating.

  I nodded. “Okay.”

  “No more stealing. Not while we’re working together. I’m not going to support a thief.”

  I jerked back in shock. My initial reaction was to refuse. How would I get through without some sort of outlet? He knew what I was thinking because his face said it all. Distaste. Worse? Shame welled up inside me and bile burned my throat.

  No one had said this was going to be easy, and my reaction only solidified the need for Mac’s help. “Okay. I promise.”

  “No drugs, no dating, no sex.”

  He’d turned to look out the driver’s side window when he delivered those gems, and I was glad of it. My face was on fire.

  “Weird that you don’t want me dating now, after you forced me to go out with Vaughn.”

  “Yeah, well, I didn’t think you’d actually go.” His stern face flickered with something like confusion, and he jammed his fingers through his hair. “Why did you?”

  I stared at him like he had two heads. “What choice did I have?”

  He was quiet for a long time before he answered. “I don’t know. It’s just not what I was expecting. You’re—” He broke off with a muttered, “Fuck,” and his tone went hard again. “Look, just stick to the point. Like I was saying, no drugs, no sex, no dating. Heightened senses, weakened reflexes, and altered perception could make you a ticking time bomb right now. Got it?”

  Seemed like my senses were the most heightened around Mac, who I’d just agreed to spend the majority of my time with, but I wasn’t about to tell him that. It would only give him an excuse to back out, not to mention force me to admit that I was crazy attracted to him. I didn’t like it, I couldn’t explain it, but it was like we’d swallowed a pair of magnets or something.

  Another thought occurred to me then. Maybe that was why the need hadn’t kicked in or tried to latch on to Vaughn. My senses were far from heightened during that kiss. Which meant that maybe someday I could have a relationship with a guy.

  As long as I wasn’t attracted to him in any way, shape, or form. Awesome.

  As for another month without dating or the rest of that stuff that I never did anyway? Please. “Not a problem,” I mumbled.

  The car was so quiet, I could hear my neighbor’s television set from across the street.

  I shifted in the seat and fought through my embarrassment. He might be in a bad mood again, and not exactly Prince Charming, but at least he was
giving me a chance. I didn’t imagine there were too many guys with his job that would have done the same. Not with the rep my kind had apparently earned. “Listen, Mac. I want you to know, I really appreciate wha—”

  “Don’t thank me, Maggie. I’m doing this because you forced my hand. This isn’t going to end well, and I feel bad even giving you false hope.” He speared a hand through his hair. “I’m here to do a job and if it takes a few weeks to get you to better understand what needs to be done and why, then that’s what I’ll do. But don’t mistake me for a friend, all right? Tomorrow, after school. Four o’clock.” He met and held my eyes, a warning in his. “Expect to be there for a while. I let you off easy because it was your first time, but it won’t happen again.”

  He faced front, and I was dismissed.

  I stepped out of the car and he screeched away with me staring after him, lost in thought. He wasn’t wrong. Our sparring did take a lot out of me, but it seemed like I wasn’t alone there. The thought energized me and my jelly legs were forgotten. I walked up the path, something like anticipation bubbling inside of me. At least I was finally getting somewhere. I had a problem that needed solving. If I had to put up with Mac Finnegan to solve it, I’d deal.

  And in the meantime, if he was as affected by me as I was by him? Well, I’d deal even better.

  Chapter Ten

  Dear Caught,

  I don’t know what’s in the water today, but I actually partly agree with She on this one. All you can do is walk the bloody walk. Be trusting and trustworthy, and reassure her about your feelings. The part where I think a little differently is that, if your girl has issues from other relationships, it’s not your job to fix her. She has to fix herself. All you can do is support her while she does it. Because of that, cutting off your female friends or falling into any of those kinds of enabling behaviors sets up a cycle and soon enough, she’ll be controlling every move you make. That’s not good for either one of you. So set your boundaries and stand strong. If she’s worth having, and if you really do treat her as well as you say you do, she’ll come ’round. If she doesn’t? Fuck her.