Who’s the Daddy: Dirty DILFs #3

by Quinn, Taryn

  I swung my legs off the couch and whimpered. Helped that I didn’t have a roommate to hear the actual old lady noises coming out of me. Sleeping on the lumpy couch the last few nights didn’t help. When I’d rented out the place, I’d bounced on the couch and thought it was so springy and comfy.

  Yeah.

  Not when you slept on it for six hours at a clip.

  I definitely had to look into a bed. There was a furniture store across from my apartment building. I’d been busy unpacking on Sunday and by the time I remembered to go over to check into it, they’d been closed. Then I ended up getting dragged over to Sage and Oliver’s house for a picnic on Labor Day.

  The furniture place wasn’t open because hello, Labor Day. And okay, maybe I’d been avoiding my bedroom.

  That had to stop.

  I’d stop in on the way home from work.

  Work. My first day of meetings and pre-planning for school. The kids got a few extra days before starting the new year. For teachers, it was madcap planning and endless meetings.

  I shuffled into the bathroom and set the shower to scalding. I snapped the shower curtain open and paused. I hadn’t had time to put that up before falling onto my face Saturday night.

  Why hadn’t I noticed that before? Like during the two showers I’d taken since.

  Because you were exhausted and delirious and oblivious, idiot.

  Dare.

  No. Do not get all squishy because he put up a curtain.

  There was no time in my life to get hung up on a guy just because we’d had an interlude.

  Yeah, getting literally fucked into my hardwood floor like it was Dare’s job wasn’t an interlude.

  Man. I shook the curtain. Not just the plastic, but the pretty purple flowered second layer on the double hook.

  Dammit.

  He wasn’t supposed to be sweet. He was supposed to give me a screamer of an orgasm and nothing more.

  Okay, so pizza too.

  But that was it.

  I flipped off my unicorn T-shirt and boxers and stepped into the small shower stall in my miniature bathroom. Sugarsnaps. It still smelled like him. Like me and him after we’d collapsed together.

  It had been days. I had to be imagining I could still smell him everywhere.

  He’d even put my soap and one of my fluffy poofs into the shower caddy hanging off the shower head. His washcloth still hung off the faucet. Okay, yes, I’d moved it a few times and put it back where he had because clearly, I was a sap.

  No, not really. It was just because I hadn’t set up my laundry corner yet.

  The little unit had a stackable washer and dryer in one of the precious closets of the apartment. But if that meant I didn’t have to schlep laundry up and down the stairs, I’d sacrifice a closet every single time.

  And that meant I had to leave the washcloth in here.

  Yeah, sure, Kelsey. Keep telling yourself that.

  Was it wrong to wonder what he smelled like with a bit of me on him all day?

  Stupid girl.

  He’d probably gone home and showered off my girl scent right away. What guy wanted to smell like blood oranges? I was surprised I wanted to smell like it. I’d been the vanilla girl all my life.

  Safe.

  But Sage had dragged me into Bath and Body Works and we’d been testing out all the scents. Somehow I’d ended up with a basket full of citrus scents because of course, there had been a sale.

  There was always a sale.

  And I was always a sucker for it.

  I squished the fresh orange foamy puff and activated all the shower gel bubbles. Between that and the steam I felt marginally better.

  I shoved Dare firmly into the back of my head as I packed up for school. It was technically September, but Crescent Cove certainly hadn’t gotten the memo.

  It was definitely sundress weather.

  And since we didn’t have to dress for the classroom yet, I took the opportunity to drag a cute summery dress out of one of the few boxes I’d opened in my bedroom.

  I had tons of room in there because…no bed.

  But at least I’d look cute.

  The big red poppies probably should have clashed with my strawberry hair, but there was enough green and white to offset my skin and abundance of freckles. I didn’t bother with much makeup since it would probably melt off my face.

  I stepped into a pair of cute sandals with a blocky heel, grabbed my purse and teacher bag—aka bucket bag I could fit a small child in—and headed down the stairs. I had to use my butt to get the door to stay closed.

  Guess I’d have to talk to my landlord about that one.

  No time for that now.

  Crescent Cove was about as safe as you could get anyway. The school was only a ten minute drive from my new place. The brick and mortar school had gotten a fresh coat of paint on all the white wood accents. The church spire had been recently renovated as well.

  I’d never thought I would work at a Catholic school, but I liked the kids and the sisters were surprisingly sweet. Mostly.

  “Hey, Kelsey. So good to see you back again this year.”

  I smiled at Jenny Pollock. “Kindergarten for the win this year, huh?”

  “Yeah. The classes have gotten smaller, but gosh, I love these kids.”

  I frowned. “Really? We were overrun last year.”

  She sighed. “Yeah. We lost a few kids to the public school across the lake.”

  “Oh.”

  I tried to ignore the twist in my belly. I had just up and moved my entire life to Crescent Cove because of this job.

  We caught up with the other teachers making their way up the miniature steps made for children. We had our first meeting in the auditorium with both the principal and vice principal.

  It was a very hearty sis-boom-rah kind of speech that had me smiling through the end of it. The nuns certainly took the cheery approach to most things. So different from the stern ones I remembered as a child in church.

  These women were colorful and sweet. The iron will still showed through, but maybe the lack of full habits helped.

  We convened on the elementary side of the labyrinth-like school. The once small rooms had been expanded thanks to various upgrades to the school property. The original small school was still the heart of the entire campus and home to the administrative offices.

  We were moving up in the world though. This year, we all got iPads to use instead of computers.

  Most of the curriculum was housed on a forum-style set up. The older students even got their homework through it and turned it in the same way. So many things had changed since I’d even been in college.

  I sat at the back of the room while the rest of the teachers mingled. Most of them had known each other for years. Since I’d come in so late during the previous school year, I’d only had time to get to know a few of them in passing.

  My phone buzzed in my sweater pocket.

  Do you want to meet me at the Spinning Wheel tonight? Maybe we can figure out Sage’s shower a little & I can not feel like a walking milkbag for an hour or so?

  I grinned down at the text from Ally. She certainly had a way with words. I quickly texted back an affirmative and caught Jenny’s eye. She waved me over, but another notification popped up.

  One from Principal Gentry.

  I frowned and opened it. There wasn’t much to it beyond asking for a meeting tomorrow. I took a look around the room and noticed a few other teachers getting the same buzz.

  The twist in my stomach settled.

  Maybe it was just a regular meeting at the beginning of the year. Like a check-in.

  Probably was.

  “Kelsey, come on over here and meet Lois.”

  I jammed my phone back into my pocket and rose with a smile. Time to mingle. My least favorite thing to do. Kids were easy, a huge group of women…

  Meh.

  I put my game face on and straightened my shoulders. This was a piece of cake.

  Three hours later,
I wished I’d said no to Ally about going to the Spinning Wheel. I sighed as I dropped into the front seat of my car.

  I cranked the air conditioning since it was still a healthy eighty-three degrees according to my phone. The resulting buzzing hum of hot air didn’t help my situation. I snapped my phone onto the dash holder and flung my sweater into the backseat.

  But I had a cute dress on and still most of my mascara on my lashes. I flipped down the visor to check out the status of said makeup. Okay, so some of it was under my eyes too, but I would not be defeated.

  I was going out with one of my new friends. And an icy cold margarita sounded like a plan.

  I settled into my car and headed toward the town proper. Part of me wondered if I should park in front of my building and walk down to the bar, but I’d been on my feet all day and the cute strappy shoes had looked adorable when I put them on this morning.

  Now?

  Yeah, they were the devil.

  But they made my legs look amazing. And if I was really in trouble, I had sneakers in my trunk. I could totally do this.

  I parked in front of the bar and did a quick pass of pressed powder so I didn’t look like a sweaty twelve-year-old with a face full of freckles. One fortifying swipe of mascara for each eye helped pull the rest of the look together. I downed a half bottle of water and unclipped my hair.

  From kindergarten teacher to single woman—easy peasy. Maybe I’d even get my flirt on a little. I was rusty as hell based on my absolute weirdo status Saturday night.

  Then again, I’d still gotten laid, so there was that. But most men weren’t all that discerning. And Dare had seemed to enjoy himself. At least I was pretty sure he had. He was a quiet one. Except when he whispered that sultry darlin’ that had liquified every corner of my girl parts. I could have orgasmed just from him saying that in my ear.

  I may have actually. I’d been damn close even before he’d put his mouth on me.

  Again, not something I’d been expecting from such a…one-night stand kind of thing? Did it count as a one-night stand when it was more like twenty-seven minutes and half a piece of pizza?

  Hmm.

  I shook those thoughts off, grabbed my notebook with the shower notes, and headed into the bar. I squinted at the swift change from searing sun to dim, dark wood. The Spinning Wheel was a coat of paint away from a dive bar, but I liked the atmosphere.

  Ally waved from the back of the room.

  Evidently, she’d gotten the memo about cute sundress day too. She wore a black and white checked one with a little black sweater over it. I crossed to her and nearly wobbled on my heel as I noticed a familiar pair of shoulders at the bar.

  No.

  Couldn’t be.

  I was just seeing things.

  A husky laugh floated out and a little shiver bloomed from the base of my spine.

  Yeah. That was definitely Dare.

  I wasn’t sure I was ready to face him quite yet, so I sprinted around a group of college guys gathered around a table in front of one of the TVs.

  “Hey,” I said and quickly sat down across from Ally.

  “Hey yourself. Wow. Look at you. Do kindergarten teachers wear stuff with so much shoulder action?”

  I laughed. “I left my sweater in the car. It’s hot as Hades.”

  “Is it? I can’t even tell anymore. I’m always hot. Probably because I’m pumping calories out of me on a near constant basis.” She lifted her margarita glass. “However, I pumped enough for three babies so I could have an adult beverage tonight.”

  I laughed. “Is that a thing?”

  “Oh, just you wait. You are a slave to a gorgeous baby for at least the first few months. Hell, a year for some. I haven’t decided if I’m going to go that long. Though if I’d let Alex hang off me forever, he would.”

  I winced. That sounded horrifying.

  She waved. “It’s not that bad. And tonight, I am just Ally who needs conversation with an adult. And to speak of baby things for someone else who is not me.” She blinked at me. “Sorry. Babbling. Want a Peachy Rita?”

  “Sounds good.”

  She gestured to the waitress and waved her glass. The girl smiled and nodded. Ally grabbed a menu off the little stand on our table. “I think I need something greasy too. I swear all I do is burn calories. I just want to eat and eat.”

  “I wish.” I folded my hands over my planner notebook. “I had a few thoughts about Sage’s shower. Any clue on a registry yet? She told me she doesn’t have one, but it would be helpful for the guests.”

  Ally seemed to hide behind her glass. She took another gulp then put it down. “Yeah, I keep forgetting to ask her to pick somewhere.”

  “Well, she can do the registry online at most places. Though it seems to be easier and more fun to go around the store with one of those gun things that scans the item.”

  “Oh, yeah. I had fun doing that. Sage and I pretty much tagged the whole place.”

  The waitress came by with two more glasses and a basket of popcorn. “Can I get you girls anything?”

  “What do you recommend?”

  The girl flicked her ponytail over her shoulder. “Our cook actually makes a decent poutine if you like that kind of thing.”

  “Oh, gravy.” Ally made gimme fingers. “Yes, that. A big one of that with extra gravy.”

  I nodded. “I’m game.” I think I’d had it once in college, but it had been awhile.

  “Keep ‘em coming,” Ally said to the waitress. She made a finger wave toward the bar. “I have a DD tonight. What’s your name again? You’re new?”

  She shrugged. “Ish. I’m Michelle if you need anything.”

  Ally leaned in and stroked her hand down my traveler’s notebook. “Now what is this lovely little thing? Sage has me forever looking at stickers and making all sorts of pretties in my little spiral planner, but nothing like this.”

  “Oh, Sage got me way down into the planner girl hole.” I laughed. “I got this off of one of those buy, sell, trade places.” I flipped open the blush pink leather journal. “I made a notebook just for Sage. I have a list area for guests, plus a few places I found where we could hold the shower. Or did you want to do it at your house? Or hers?”

  “Hmm.” Ally took another sip from her drink and pushed the empty glass away, dragging the new one in front of her. “We could do it at my house. We have a nice big backyard. Can barbecue and have cute little virgin versions of umbrella drinks. She loves those.”

  “Oh, that sounds fun.” I sipped at my drink between scribbles into the little insert I’d printed out at the local stationery store. It had sections for lists, dates, and a whole project page. I added reminders for myself to look up drinks to take apart and make them safe for pregnant ladies. “I read up on some foods that you can and can’t eat when you’re pregnant. Wow, quite the list.”

  “I missed cheese the most. I swear, I ate a whole wheel of Brie by myself after Alex was born. I never even cared about it until the baby books told me I couldn’t have it.”

  Michelle came back with our appetizer. My eyes went wide, and my tongue practically hung out. “Hello.”

  Michelle laughed. “Enjoy, ladies. Need another round?”

  I looked down at my nearly empty margarita. When had that happened? “I guess so.”

  We had hashed out most of our ideas for the shower when suddenly, an adorably pregnant blond plopped down beside me and filched a smothered cheese curd.

  A man held a napkin in front of her mouth. “Spit it out.”

  Sage sealed her mouth shut and shook her head.

  “Sage.” Oliver Hamilton—aka her studly husband—did not sound amused. He had the dad thing down pretty solidly.

  She snatched the napkin out of his hand and did it herself. “Come on. One cheese curd won’t hurt.” She glanced up at Oliver and added a sizable pout.

  “Do you know if it’s pasteurized? For sure?”

  Sage slumped. “No.”

  “Then no.” He smiled dow
n at her and brushed his finger along the skin behind her ear. “I’ll make you a sundae before bed.”

  She smiled. “Okay, that’s acceptable.”

  Oliver rolled his eyes. “Hi, ladies.”

  Ally slurped her margarita. “Did he really tell you to spit it out like a three-year-old?”

  Sage smirked. “He knows I never spit voluntarily.”

  I choked down a laugh and felt salt burn my esophagus.

  As if his saucy wife had never spoken, Oliver rattled change in his pocket. “I’m well versed in such thanks to Laurie. She also likes to eat things she shouldn’t.”

  Ally blew raspberries at him. “You’re not the fun uncle at all.”

  “I’ll remind you of that when you eat the cookies we made tonight.”

  Ally’s eyes went huge. “Oh, bonus points. Okay, you can have fun uncle status back, but only if there were chocolate chips included in said cookies.”

  “Butterscotch and chocolate chip actually.”

  Ally clasped her hands under her chin and fluttered her lashes. “Man, I might even kiss you.”

  “Please don’t.”

  I snorted at Oliver’s deadpan voice.

  He ran an absent hand down Sage’s hair. “Behave. I ordered you a basket of fries. You can have those to hold you over.”

  “Excellent.” Sage leaned back in her chair and tipped her chin up to him. “Get me a fizzy water too, please.”

  He dutifully dropped a kiss on her lips. “Yes, dear.” He headed back to the bar and Sage watched him the whole time.

  Sage grinned. “We sound like we’re eighty, but man, I love that guy. And he’s got an ass made for spanking.”

  I coughed. Maybe Sage never spit, but I had come awfully close to spraying my drink. Different substance than she’d been talking about however.

  She was such a dirty girl. And I loved her for it. “Is that so?”

  Sage nodded. “Took some convincing for him to try it, but Oliver is game for most things.”

  I tried to picture it and just could not. The other way around—yeah, I didn’t want to go there. Just the idea of that tall, proper guy with Sage over his lap…

  I needed help.