Captivate, book I of the Love & Lust

by Miles, Amy

  Removing the microphone from the podium, she steps to the side so everyone can see the beautiful girl at her side. “I would like you all to meet Abby Maldoni. I first met Abby a year ago at Alcott Elementary on the outskirts of Chicago. She’d just turned five and was behind in both her writing and language skills, but boy did she have one heck of an amazing smile.”

  Ashlyn looks down to see Abby flashing that same exact smile at the crowd. She can see numerous returned smiles and a few damp eyes. “Abby was a normal girl in a normal classroom, but she was falling behind. Our classes today are overpopulated; our teachers are run ragged trying to keep up with the ever-growing demands. Funding doesn’t arrive when it is needed and most of the children just like Abby are falling through the cracks.”

  She reaches out and takes Abby’s small hand in her own. “A year ago, Abby couldn’t have written me this card, but today she handed me the greatest gift ever… hope.”

  A slow round of applause begins to filter through the crowd, but Ashlyn presses on. “Your donations tonight won’t help just one child, but hundreds in the surrounding area. You can help fund after-school tutors to help children learn to read and write, help create support groups for parents with tools to aid them in their homes, and give Abby and so many others the confidence they need to excel.”

  Ashlyn sinks down and gives Abby a huge hug before sending her back to her mother. She can see tear streaks of gratitude on Abby’s parents’ faces that gives Ashlyn the courage to continue.

  “Tonight isn’t about the fancy food, the expensive dresses, or even about how terrible my dancing will be after this is over.” She pauses for the laughter. “This foundation was created out of need, but it will be supported by your love. Will you help me change lives?”

  A loud clap begins at the very back of the room and quickly flows toward the front. Chairs shift as people rise to their feet in a rousing applause. Sophie sits on the front row, whistling loudly in approval.

  Ashlyn steps back, shocked by the response. Did she really just pull this off?

  Never in her wildest dreams could she have imagined a feeling such as this. A complete and humble acceptance of this applause. Not for herself, but for the cause.

  Please let them see how special these kids are, she silently prays as she nods her head in thanks.

  Rebecca steps up and gives Ashlyn a hug. “That was even better than I could have hoped for.”

  Ashlyn laughs and steps back to show her how shaky her hands still are. “I made it.”

  “You did more than that.” Rebecca grins, waving her hand out toward the audience. “You did this.”

  A tingly warmth spreads along her chest and down into her belly as Ashlyn offers a small wave of acknowledgement before turning and escaping back to her assigned chair. Her chest rises and falls as she fights to still her nerves. She did it! She really did it.

  Twenty-One

  Slade weaves his way through the crowd, stunned by the beautiful woman dancing less than fifteen feet away. Her cheeks are flushed with excitement and her hair has fallen from its pins, giving her a far more natural look.

  Ashlyn hasn’t stopped smiling since she completed her speech, and what a speech it was. Even he felt moved to donate everything he had in his pocket to the cause.

  How did she do it? It didn’t take a genius to see how terrified she was on that stage. Until that little girl approached her, he was sure Ash would race off and hide in the corner, just like he found her in the hall in Las Vegas, but she didn’t. She not only captivated the entire crowd, but she made it personal.

  As she spoke, he couldn’t help but think about his primary school back in England. His teacher had been less than cooperative when his mother tried to seek out help when he struggled to learn to read. It wasn’t really her fault; she was just too busy with the other children to give him special attention. Slade’s mother hadn’t had the money to spare to hire a tutor, so they did the best they could.

  Looking back now, it really does make sense why Slade never enjoyed reading. It wasn’t that he couldn’t read, but it was a struggle. His letters liked to flip in his head, teasing him. Reading aloud was the worst.

  And now, dancing before him is the most amazing woman he’s ever met. Not only is she kind and thoughtful, but she has a heart for children to surpass any that he has ever met.

  “Mind if I have this dance?” He taps a gentleman on the shoulder and smiles back at Ashlyn’s shocked gaze.

  “Of course. It’s been a pleasure.” The older man, with salt-and-pepper hair and neatly groomed mustache, lightly places a kiss on the back of her hand before passing her over to Slade.

  “What are you doing here?” she asks as he turns her and leads her back onto the dance floor. He places his hand on her waist and draws her close.

  He can tell by the stiffness of her spine under his hand that she’s confused. “You look stunning in that dress, Ash.” He smiles, letting his gaze fall over the lace bodice and the black sash tied about her slender waist.

  He can nearly span her entire back with his hand. She feels dainty in his arms, but he knows there’s an inner strength within her that would make a giant cringe. He would sorely like to see that more often.

  A blush clings to her chest as she drops her gaze. “You didn’t answer my question.”

  “Do you want the long or short answer?”

  She thinks it over for a moment, effortlessly keeping up with the beat of the music. “Short, I think.”

  “I was worried about you.”

  Her eyes widen with surprise. “I never asked you to… You shouldn’t,” she stammers.

  “I wanted to, so here I am.” His grip tightens on her back as the tempo rises and he moves them around the dance floor, twirling among a rainbow of colorful dresses.

  He can feel her gaze drifting over him, assessing his response. When he meets her stare, she quickly flits away.

  “Why do you do that?”

  “Do what?” She turns and looks to the people surrounding her, her focus fixed firmly away from him.

  “Avoid me.”

  Her shoulders tense and her steps falter just enough to nearly topple them over. Slade compensates for her weight and saves them at the last second. With his heart pounding in his ears, he takes her hand and leads her off the dance floor and toward an unoccupied table. “I’m not… I don’t avoid you.”

  “Really?” He holds out a chair for her and leans over to pour a glass of water. He holds it out for her, waiting for her to finally look up at him. He can almost feel her fear as she takes the glass from his hand. When she goes to take a long drink, he can see the way the glass trembles in her hand.

  “It’s okay,” he whispers, leaning in close.

  The bitterness in her laugh surprises him as she pulls out of his reach. She sinks back into the chair and set the drinks aside. Once her hands are free, she begins to fiddle with the black sash about her waist. “No. It’s not.”

  Watching the expressions that dash across her face, he suddenly wonders if coming here was a very bad idea. He had hoped to surprise her and that she would be happy to see him, but now he’s not so sure. “I didn’t mean to upset you.”

  When she looks up, he sees tears glistening in her eyes. “It’s not you. It’s me.”

  She sighs and curls her legs up under her in a crossed position. He glances around to make sure no one else sees this inappropriate posture, but he quickly realizes it shouldn’t matter. This is who Ashlyn is, and she shouldn’t change that just to impress the people in this room.

  Her hair falls about her face as she speaks. “I know what you think about me. That I’m some fragile thing that’s wound so tight she’s about to break apart, and you know what? You’re right.”

  Slade watches the trembling in her hands as she stares at her lap. “Sophie and Tamsin are the closest things I have to friends, and I don’t even really know them. We work together, go on business trips together, but they have never been to my house
or even gone to a movie with me.”

  She takes a deep breath before continuing. This time she lifts her gaze to stare at him head on. “I don’t have a single friend that I could call close, and I like it that way.”

  He leans forward, perching on the edge of his chair. The music shifts, slowing in tempo, but he hardly notices. “If that’s true, then why do you look so miserable right now?”

  A single whimper passes her lips before she shuts it down. “Because I can’t let myself have anything else.”

  “Why not?”

  Ashlyn looks away, wiping unfallen tears from her eyes. His stomach clenches at the sight of her unhappiness. “I don’t trust the world. It has hurt me too many times, so now I avoid it.”

  Slade sighs, shaking his head. “That isn’t a life, Ash.”

  “I know,” she whispers. She reaches out for her glass but clutches it in her lap, almost as if she just needed the security of something to hold.

  “I don’t want to hurt you,” he says. “I’m sorry if my coming here has upset you, but I’m not sorry for coming. You were brilliant up there. To see your passion, to hear you speak… it was smashing.”

  A tiny smile cracks through her gloom. “Really?”

  “Yes.” He leans in a bit closer, waiting for her to look up at him. “I know you have things the way you want them in your life, and I’m fine with that, but you need to know that I think you are kinda special. I’d like to be friends, if you think that would be all right.”

  Friends? Slade fights to keep the sudden urge to frown from showing through. Is that really all I want with this beautiful woman sitting before me?

  Slade can feel the desire for more beginning to birth within his mind. His need to protect this fragile woman has begun to shift into something more tangible, something completely out of his league.

  Ashlyn laughs and grabs a napkin to dab at her eyes. “I think I’d like that.”

  Her tentative smile makes his skin tingle with warmth. “I know you need time, and I’m okay with that. I just want you to know that I’m here if you need me.”

  She starts to rise but then looks back at him. He can see her distrust inching back in. “Why are you doing this?”

  Her question catches him off guard, but no more so than the raw yearning in her voice that fuels it. “Maybe I like helping neurotic women?”

  He’s instantly awarded with a tentative smile and silently cheers. Being around Ashlyn is like night from day. At times she can be so fiercely demanding and abrupt, but other times, those special moments when she lowers her walls just enough for him to peek over, he sees a beautiful girl who has yet to be unsoiled by the carnal desires of the world.

  “Think I can charm another dance out of you before the evening is over?”

  She laughs and shrugs. “I’ll have to think about it.”

  He watches as she shifts away, making a beeline straight for Tamsin’s agent, Sophie. As he sinks back into the chair, he can’t help but wonder if a girl like Ashlyn could ever fancy a guy like him.

  Twenty-Two

  Ashlyn looks over her checklist for the fourth time. She is sure that she’s still missing something. The boxes of books have arrived in New York on time and the swag is all laid out on the tables. She steps back to admire the wicker baskets that she decided to add as a last minute organizing tool. They look even better than she had hoped.

  Tamsin’s dress has been pressed and is now draped over a spare table near the back of the room. The box of balloons has been placed by the helium canister to be blown up tomorrow before the event. The empty vases, which will hold half a dozen white roses, have been placed on each author’s table.

  Two six-foot high banners stand on either side of the entrance. The check-in table has been decked out in tulle and shimmering ribbon.

  Ashlyn taps her lip, wondering if the décor screams a bit too much wedding instead of just romance.

  Although Tamsin has been invited to her fair share of sexy signings in the past, Ashlyn really wanted this event to have a bit more class. Not that there’s anything wrong with the other style; she just wanted a change.

  Forty tables have been set up, each display different than the next. This New York book signing is one that Ashlyn has been looking forward to for quite some time. A room filled with amazing authors, many of them she has looked up to for years, who will be together for six painfully short hours. She’s hoping to sneak in a little one-on-one time with them before the crowds arrive tomorrow afternoon.

  “Need any help?”

  She turns to find Slade poking his head into the room. Her stomach rolls at the thought of him being near her. Since the night of the gala, he has been far more attentive than before, if that were even possible. As much as she enjoys his company, the tension growing between her and Tamsin is starting to put a major strain on their working relationship.

  “Um, I’m just sort of getting stuff put together,” she calls back, letting the top layer of her checklist fall out of her hand. The page is filled with red slash marks, noting the chores that have already been seen to, but there are still plenty left to work on. “Another hour and we should be good to go.”

  “Brilliant.” He steps fully into the room, pausing to close the door behind him. He strides forward, exuding confidence and his usual irresistible swagger. “With two of us working, I’m sure we can get done in time for dinner.”

  “Oh, um…” She glances at her watch. “I thought you were eating with Tamsin tonight.”

  “Nah.” He shakes his head. “She was in a bad mood so I bailed. Figured you might be better company.”

  She nervously tucks a stray strand of hair behind her ear and realizes what a mess she must look. Her ponytail has begun to fall out and her yoga pants are sticking tightly to her thighs. Her skin feels clammy and she has a suspicion she might smell of sweat. She shifts away, hopefully well out of smelling range.

  “I’ve just got to move these chairs around a bit and get the gift bags loaded up. Once that’s done, I need to place one on each table and track down some candles.”

  Slade glances around. “Isn’t there someone else that’s supposed to be doing this for you? An event coordinator or something?”

  Ashlyn chews on her lower lip. “Technically.”

  “Technically?”

  “I, uh… I fired her.”

  “Watch out, folks. The girl’s got power!” His deep, rumbling laughter breaks through her nerves and she relaxes just a bit. It’s nice to hear him laugh, especially when it coincides with something she said. “How is that even possible? Aren’t they hired by the organizer?”

  She smirks as she works to straighten an uneven tablecloth. “I have my ways.”

  “I bet you do.”

  She blushes when she looks up to see a mischievous glint in his eyes, implying that he was probably referring to something else entirely. She clears her throat and moves toward the gift bags. “If you really want to help, you could start stuffing these. There are forty bags, one of each item for each author.”

  “Good thing I didn’t fail maths in school.” Slade chuckles as he grabs a handful of New York Author Event buttons and starts passing them among the bags.

  From time to time, Ashlyn finds herself stopping to enjoy Slade’s company. His jokes are funny and his sarcasm hilarious. Even when she tries to keep a straight face, he finds a way to disarm her.

  By the time the chairs have been arranged and Slade puts the last bow on the gift bags, he has her nearly in tears. “Why aren’t you normally like this?” she asks, wiping at her eyes.

  “Like what?” He turns to face her, confused.

  “Natural. I like you much better like this.”

  His brow furrows for a moment but then releases into a smile that makes her feel a tad breathless. “You said you like me.”

  “No, no!” She shakes her head, laughing. “I said I like this, not you.”

  “Sounds like the same thing to me.” He rises from his chair and mov
es toward her. Ashlyn backpedals, racing around the edge of the table to snag a spare pack of ribbon so she doesn’t have to look at him

  She grimaces as her hip smacks into the sharp corner but doesn’t slow down. She’s really going to feel that later tonight!

  Ashlyn quickly busies herself with rearranging a bouquet display beside Tamsin’s table, tying a big shimmery bow around the neck of the vase. It falls limp in her hands and she tries again, feeling her mounting frustration begin to ease some of her nerves.

  Slade walks around the table, taking his time to reach her. Her breathing increases as she feels him stop just behind her. Too close! Much too close!

  Her mind screams for her to bail out, but she doesn’t. She can’t seem to move.

  “Have dinner with me.”

  It isn’t an offer and they both know it. They both also know that this request has thrown them way out of the friendship realm that he claimed was all he wanted.

  He lied, or maybe this is all a big joke to him. Ashlyn inwardly groans, too confused by his nearness to think clearly.

  “I’m not sure that’s a good idea.” She hedges, lifting a rose to shift it to the middle of the vase. It stands higher than the other flowers, beautiful and graceful. A great focal point and a brilliant momentary distraction. “I’ve got so much to do tonight to prep…”

  “You said you would be done in an hour.” He places a hand on her arm and she falls silent. The frantic beating of her heart makes it hard to hear him breathing behind her. “It’s just dinner, Ash. Not a marriage proposal.”

  She laughs, hating that it comes out sounding like a terrified squeak. “I don’t know…”

  Slade slowly turns her around. She never realized how much taller he is than her. At nearly 5’5”, she isn’t tall by any means, but he towers at least a head over her. His shoulders are broad in her vision, his masculine scent heady and utterly enticing.

  She closes her eyes, fighting against her panic. Don’t pass out. Please don’t pass out.

  Ashlyn opens her eyes as he places a finger under her chin. His touch is soft, as gentle as his gaze. “Think of it as a thank you for this opportunity you gave me. You’re the only one who really saw my potential and I’m grateful.”