The Initiation

by Chris Babu

  “Sure.”

  “Why did you enter the Initiation?”

  “Why are you asking?”

  “This thing is crazy dangerous. Kids don’t usually enter the Initiation. I heard nobody had entered in two years. You’re really smart, and I can understand wanting a chance at a better life. Except most people don’t risk death for a better life. Both of Sidney’s parents were exiled, and she feels like she has nothing to lose. Charlie’s crazy; that’s why he entered. Tim did because he hoped to protect me.”

  Drayden leaned in and whispered, to avoid the Watchers. “My mom was exiled and something was fishy about it. If I make it to the Palace, I’m going to find out what happened. Alex’s dad is a drug dealer. Probably has something to do with him entering.” He was so close to her neck. He pulled back, speaking normally again. “But you, you’re so smart, and beautiful, you have both your parents. I just…I was interested to know.”

  Catrice watched her feet while she walked. “I’d seen your mom at the FDC. She seemed nice. She was always helping old people with their groceries, and smiling. She must have been a good mom.”

  “She was.” Drayden beamed. “She was amazing. I loved her more than anyone in the world.” Picturing her running the FDC, something struck Drayden. Mom was important, and senior in the Dorms. It was highly unlikely she would have been randomly exiled. Though horrid to think, since all exiles were awful, the Bureau would probably exile seamstresses or janitors first. There were hundreds of them. That would imply her exile was not random. Someone had ordered it.

  “What’s your dad like?” Catrice asked.

  “Very smart. To his credit, he’s been trying his best with my mom gone. For most of my life though, he’s been totally detached. There, but not present, if you know what I mean.”

  “Mine too,” she said. “He’s a genius, in his own world. I guess our fathers are similar. My mom isn’t like yours, though. Just because you have both parents doesn’t mean everything is good.”

  “Oh, I didn’t mean to imply…yeah, I know. What’s your mom like?”

  “She…I don’t really want to talk about it.” Catrice bowed her head. “You know how if we pass the Initiation we have the option of bringing our families along? Well, let’s just say not only would I not bring mine, I entered the Initiation to get away from…her.” She paused. “So I could be safe,” she added quietly.

  “I’m sorry.” Drayden had been avoiding the fact that only one of them would likely be picked to move to the Palace. While Catrice wasn’t concerned about moving her family, the others undoubtedly were, as was he. He wondered if the Bureau had exiled anyone else from the Dorms this morning. What were the odds people that cruel would pick more than one? “I hope you make it to the Palace.”

  “Thanks. I hope you make it too.”

  “Hey, you want to hear a joke?” Drayden asked, lightening the mood. “It’s math humor, so you’re the only one who would appreciate it.”

  She raised her eyebrows and nodded.

  “What did the zero say to the eight?”

  “What?”

  “Nice belt.”

  Catrice cringed. “Got any better ones?”

  “Uh…you remember Mr. Kale used to have that plant in math class? Do you know why it died?”

  “No, why?” she asked, her expression suspicious.

  “Because it grew square roots.”

  She chuckled. “I think you should just stick to doing math.”

  The tracks rounded a turn and the familiar white glow came into view.

  Those few moments of peace and normal conversation came to an abrupt halt at the Christopher Street station. Drayden was starting to cherish the brief interludes of quiet and safety that fell between the terror of the subway stations.

  Once again, the pledges stood in a giant room. This time it stretched the entire width of the station. The Bureau had covered all the tracks with the platform floor. Again, a white wall cut the station short in the distance. It also blocked them.

  Drayden led everyone down the platform in the direction of the wall. A long table came into view, sitting well in front of the wall. Otherwise, the station was empty.

  Drayden slowed.

  The ground shimmered in front of the wall.

  “Anyone else see that?” Charlie asked.

  “It’s water,” Sidney said.

  As they reached it, Drayden’s pulse quickened.

  Right before the wall there was a gap in the floor filled with water. It was only about fifteen feet of water to the wall, but the water stretched from the left edge of the station all the way to the right, like a river through the middle of the platform they had to traverse. Simply crossing it would accomplish nothing, since a wall blocked everything past it.

  Yet this was no ordinary river. It was crystal clear, like a swimming pool, and so deep the bottom wasn’t visible. The water appeared to continue underneath the rest of the platform, past the wall. Though the station lights illuminated the water in front of them, it turned dark beneath the platform. The wall blocked the view further down the station, so it was unclear how far under the platform the water extended. No airspace existed between the surface of the water and the underside of the platform.

  Without even reading the note, Drayden knew what this challenge was about. They had to swim, underwater, beneath the platform. In the darkness, with no idea where, or how far, to go.

  “Man, that water gets darker than the Dorms on a Tuesday night,” Charlie said. He lay down on his stomach, peering over the surface of the water. “What are the chances we only have to swim under the wall and can come right up on the other side?”

  “About one in a million,” Drayden mumbled.

  Charlie pointed at him. “So you’re saying there’s a chance.”

  Sidney snatched the note from the table and read out loud, “Control your breath, and you might prevent death. Prove you can overcome your fear of the unknown. You must swim under the platform and find the exit further down the station. You may leave your backpacks here, and they will be waiting for you a hundred yards down the tracks. Your flashlights will work underwater. Good luck.”

  Drayden bent over, his hands on his knees. He wasn’t an adept swimmer, and had no idea how long he could hold his breath underwater. Swimming underwater triggered his claustrophobia, something about the inability to breathe. Thus, he’d never spent much time submerged.

  A clock hung over the table, ticking down: 03:38:02, 03:38:01…

  “Any chance that water is warm?” Alex asked.

  Charlie dipped in his hand, and quickly jerked it back out. “It’s colder than a polar bear’s toes.”

  Drayden needed to lead and ignore his fear. Tim’s voice spoke in his head. All he had to do was emulate it. “You guys, let’s leave our backpacks here like they said. Most of this stuff needs to stay dry. I know the air is cool and the water is freezing, but we might want to take our clothes off and stuff them in our backpacks so they’ll be dry when we come out.”

  “Who put you in charge, wetchop?” Alex asked.

  Drayden had thought it himself. You couldn’t fake being a leader. Leave it to Alex to immediately seize upon his insecurity.

  “You can do whatever you want, Alex. I don’t care,” Drayden said. “I’m talking to Sidney and Catrice, and Charlie if he wants my opinion. You want to get your clothes and backpack wet, be my guest.”

  After Alex made a face at him, he shut up and joined Charlie by the pool.

  Sidney pumped her fist and high-fived Drayden.

  Charlie approached. “I think it’s genius. Everybody should totally take their clothes off.” He eyed both girls up and down.

  “Don’t be a creep, Charlie,” Sidney said, looking disgusted.

  Charlie raised his hands, proclaiming innocence. “Who? Me? I’m just very worried about
your clothes staying dry.”

  A sniffle behind Drayden caught his attention. He spun around.

  Catrice was leaning against one of the steel pillars, her arms crossed over her chest.

  Drayden ran to her. “Catrice? What’s wrong?”

  She just shook her head.

  She had reacted the same way at the start of the other bravery challenges, Drayden noted. She probably just needed a minute to get over her fear. He leaned down to look in her eyes.

  “Hey. What is it? Are you scared of water or something?”

  Catrice looked at him, tears streaming down her cheeks. “I can’t swim.”

  Drayden stared, his mouth agape. Oh no. Who couldn’t swim? Then again, Dorm kids didn’t exactly spend their summers by a lake in the woods. While the school basement housed a pool, swimming wasn’t required. Life was so dull in the Dorms, most kids went berserk for two things: swimming and riding bikes. Catrice, on the other hand, avoided anything athletic. Recalling the rat challenge, Catrice initially refused help. The moment the doors opened, she had taken his hand and never let go. His concern for her propelled him through the challenge then. Why not simply do that again?

  Because Drayden wasn’t a strong swimmer himself; that was why. Struggling to drag her along underwater might not help either of them. Furthermore, his injuries limited his strength and mobility. He shuddered, imagining the deep puncture wound in his back touching the water.

  “You can ride on my back,” Charlie said, walking over. “I’m an expert swimmer. You don’t need to know how to swim. You just need to hold your breath and hang onto me. You can even close your eyes.”

  It did make sense for her to go with him, and this certainly wasn’t the time for petty jealousy. Charlie could save her life.

  “He’s right, Catrice. Most people can hold their breath for a while, even under stress. You’ll get in the water with Charlie and practice going underwater with him.”

  She wiped her eyes with her palms. “Thanks, you guys,” she said, her voice quivering.

  “Thanks, Charlie,” Drayden said.

  Charlie patted Drayden on the shoulder. “No, thank you.” He winked and walked away.

  Drayden felt weak, inadequate, and embarrassed. “Hey, I would’ve offered to do it. It’s just, I’m not a great swimmer myself. I don’t think I’d be doing us any favors.”

  Catrice dried her cheeks with her shirt. “It’s all right, Drayden. You don’t have to be the hero. Being brave is enough.”

  Maybe. How would he feel when he saw her wrapped around Charlie’s back, both in their underwear?

  “Hey, you guys!” Sidney shouted.

  Everyone gathered around her. She blew warm breath into her hands and rubbed them together. “Being awesome at riddles won’t save us this time, but being a great swimmer will. And I’m really good.” She glanced at Catrice. “What if I swim as far as I can and come back and tell you what I find? It might be a maze under there.”

  “That’s a brilliant idea,” Drayden said. “Just please, don’t get lost. Thanks, Sid.”

  She gave him a thumbs-up.

  “Charlie,” Drayden said, “you and Catrice should practice swimming underwater right here while Sidney explores.”

  “Roger that,” Charlie said. “As soon as I watch Sidney and Catrice undress.” He fist-bumped Alex. “Look. We gotta do it. You said so yourself.” He pulled off his t-shirt and stuffed it into his backpack, his shoulder muscles rippling. “Oh, like you’re not gonna sneak a peek?” he asked Drayden. “I know Alex will.”

  Drayden blushed and avoided eye contact with Sidney or Catrice. He hated Charlie more than ever. He hated even more that Charlie was right, as brazenly slimy as he was about it. Drayden had spied girls in bulky, ill-fitted Dorm bathing suits at the pool, but never one in her underwear. He’d never dreamed he’d get to see Catrice like that, though he’d often fantasized about it. He trembled with excitement, and hated himself for that too.

  The pledges exchanged apprehensive looks and undressed.

  Drayden consciously focused on the ground beneath him, refusing to raise his eyes. He stuffed his clothes and hat into his backpack. Standing there in his underwear, he became awkwardly aware of his arms. He fidgeted, unsure what to do with them. The brief embarrassment about his skinny body after the rat challenge returned tenfold.

  Charlie’s muscular legs stretched his underwear tight, whereas Drayden’s baggy underwear sagged. With his stick legs, he just didn’t have enough body to fill them up. Charlie was so much more damn manly than he was. He couldn’t help but wonder: Considering how much girls claimed they desired boys who were smart and interesting, why did they always seem to go for moronic Adonises like Charlie?

  Drayden couldn’t resist any longer, and looked at Sidney and Catrice. He sought not to react in any visible way, but he stopped breathing.

  They both wore gray underwear, and Sidney had on a red bra, while Catrice sported a green one. Sidney stood with her shoulders back and her ample chest out. She seemed not the slightest bit embarrassed.

  Had she been semi-naked in front of boys before?

  Catrice, on the other hand, swaddled both arms around her body, doing everything she could to cover up.

  She was exquisite. Her skin was flawless, and while skinny, she appeared soft, not bony.

  Sidney cocked her head. “Can you guys not stare?”

  Drayden snapped out of his spell and glanced at the other boys.

  Both were doing the same thing he was. Staring.

  Drayden blushed again. He couldn’t help ogling Sidney as she bounced up to the water’s edge.

  Charlie followed her and they both dipped in their toes. “Holy shkatnuts!” Charlie bellowed. “Man, that’s chillier than a tin toilet seat in an igloo.”

  Sidney swished her foot around. “Crap. I’ve never swum in water that freezing.”

  Drayden tiptoed up to the edge and stuck in his foot.

  The water wasn’t just cold. It was icy. Within seconds, his foot ached.

  He jerked it out, his whole body shivering. How could he pass this challenge? It was impossible. He couldn’t even touch the water, let alone swim through it, submerged, in the dark, with no clue how far it would be. He flopped down on the platform and wrapped his arms around his legs. He wished Tim was here.

  He visualized Tim’s face looking down on him from somewhere above. Smiling. What would Tim say? He’d say, “We’re doing this no matter what, since we have no choice. Be cold, or be exiled. Like the rat challenge, just get through it.” Drayden rose, his chin up. He had to push. He had to do this. He could do this.

  He recalled a moment with his mother, after he’d suffered through a cold bath during a power outage. She’d told him about this PreCon thing called the Polar Bear Club. People would willingly swim in frigid water during winter, sometimes even beneath ice. It sounded totally stupid. Mom said people did it to refresh the soul or something. Dad had chimed in from a medical angle, saying it increased bloodflow and could boost your immune system, though it also carried a lot of danger.

  “Sidney,” he said, “I think the water is too frosty for a test run. You’ll be in the water too long. You might get hypothermia. Catrice, it’s too cold for you and Charlie to practice. Usually in a chilly pool, the best way to get in is to close your eyes and jump, right? I think it’s too cold for that, our bodies might go into shock. We need to ease our way in. Besides just freezing, we’re going to hyperventilate at first. As soon as it passes, we have to go.”

  Drayden knelt and eyed the surface of the water. “We should probably shine our flashlights up at the ceiling, the platform’s underside, when we’re underwater. There’s no space between the water and the ceiling, but if we’re lucky they left some air pockets, caves basically, where we can catch our breath. If you don’t see a ceiling above your head, go up for air.”


  “I don’t know what all you wetchops are crying about,” Alex said. “I take a beating from my five older brothers every week. I can swim in a cold pool.”

  “Good,” Drayden said. “You can help everyone else get through this then.”

  The pledges retrieved their flashlights and sat on the edge of the platform. They dipped their feet in.

  Pain snaked through Drayden’s toes and ankles. He fought the powerful urge to jerk them out. He lowered further, down to his knees, his teeth chattering.

  “Jumping Jesus on a pogo stick!” Charlie cried out, now submerged down to his chest. “Wait till you guys get to the…waist area.” His voice trembled.

  Catrice lay on her stomach, her legs underwater up to her knees. Already shaking, her eyes were closed and her lips pursed.

  Drayden’s eyes wandered down her arched back to her butt. Stop it, he thought, turning away. She was terrified and suffering, they all faced death or exile, and he was leering like a peeping Tom. Focus on the task at hand. He looked again.

  “I’m in,” Sidney squeaked. She treaded water away from the edge.

  Drayden lowered down to his thighs, expanding the pain surface area. Thankfully the ice water had already numbed his feet and ankles. The next part, the plunge, terrified him. Five more seconds. It had to be done. He flipped over, his stomach on the ledge. He held the ledge, and dropped in.

  He gasped, sucking in a deep, audible breath.

  So cold!

  The hyperventilation began. The breaths came faster and faster. His body screamed in pain, and his legs turned to cement.

  Think about Catrice! She needs you.

  Drayden sucked in a breath, attempted to hold it, but failed. He closed his eyes and thought about how much Mom must have suffered when she was exiled. The pain she experienced. Terrified, alone, no food or water, facing the unknown. Icy water paled in comparison. Drayden’s breathing slowed. He breathed through his nose, which helped. He opened his eyes. He was through it.

  Charlie treaded water in the center of the pool. Alex hung on the ledge, like Drayden, breathing hard. Catrice had made the plunge, though she clutched the platform with her arms fully out. Her whole body quivered. Where was Sidney?