Skypunch (The Skypunch Chronicles Book 1)

by Logan Castle

  “I know,” Plum answered but I wondered if she really believed me. “But it doesn’t change how much you hurt me and I hurt you, Isaac. We have both hurt each other so badly and I don’t know how either of us could ever trust each other again.” She stopped talking and sobbed. “I… I just don’t see a way back from it.” She paused for a few seconds and I trapped more air in my lungs, but I couldn’t breathe. My heart was pounding so hard in my chest, demanding that I take a breath but I couldn’t.

  “Don’t do this, Plum,” I said, my voice sounding so weak and futile. “Please. We can get through this. I know we can.”

  “I wish we could, baby,” she whispered, her pain bleeding through her words. “But we are toxic for each other, Isaac,” she finished before her sobs grew louder, more insistent.

  I couldn’t speak for a few seconds. I just sat there in total denial, letting her words repeat themselves in my head. They were the same words Tina had told me time and time again as she tried to wedge herself between Plum and me.

  You and Plum are toxic for each other. She isn’t right for you and you know it, deep down. She won’t make you happy. You should be with someone who won’t hurt you, Isaac.

  When Tina said those words to me, I’d actually listened and had even started to believe them! Suddenly, I hated Tina more than I’d ever hated her before. I hated her selfishness, her immaturity, for not accepting that she, Tina, meant nothing to me and never could.

  “Don’t do this, Plum,” I begged her as my voice broke. “I need you.”

  “No,” she replied as she blew her nose. “You only need yourself.”

  “That isn’t true!” I railed at her and hot tears started gushing from my eyes.

  “I just can’t do it anymore,” she continued, her tone growing stronger and more detached. “I don’t trust you now Isaac, and it’s killing me. I can’t keep wondering who you’re going to meet next. It was Tina at the Christmas party and then it was that chick from the bar who freaked out on you in the hospital. But who will it be next time, Isaac?” She inhaled deeply. “I can’t do it anymore. It’s killing me inside.”

  “Please, Plum,” I whispered. “Please don’t do this.”

  “I have to,” she cried. “And someday you will thank me.” Then she started sobbing even harder, to the point that she couldn’t speak. “I… I have to go, Isaac.”

  She hung up.

  I didn’t know how long I just sat there, staring at my computer screen, my hands below the surface of the desk, tucked beneath my thighs. Time itself seemed to slow down and I became almost completely unaware of it. The only indication of its passing was the morphing of my desktop into the virtual aquarium that served as my screensaver. In truth, while my eyes were trained on the screen, I was hardly looking at it. Better to say I was looking through it.

  I was numb. I couldn’t comprehend what just happened, or that Plum was removing herself from my life. I could no longer stare into those eyes or hear that unique laugh. I couldn’t imagine never smiling with her again, or holding her hand, or kissing her, or making love to her.

  My eyes wandered to the right of my screen and landed on a picture sitting on the desk. Two smiling faces stared back at me, both with brown mops of hair and big, brown eyes. My sons Dillon, age seven, and Max, age four. Max’s smile, despite lacking many teeth, was directed only at the toy he tucked between his legs. Dillon stood alongside his sitting brother, a black mask over his eyes, a red cape draped across his shoulders and his arms at his hips in a classic Superman pose.

  Then I remembered how much they both loved Plum and how much she loved them. I lost it then. Tears rolled down my face as I dropped my head into the crook of my elbow and sobbed helplessly. How did it come to this? How did I lose the one person who truly was my soul mate? How could I let this happen and for what? For a lousy fuck with Tina? For someone whom I’ve never been particularly fond of? How did I do such a horrible thing to the only woman I loved? How could I have been so stupid?

  My thoughts were broken by a sudden vibrating in my right pocket. My cell phone. Hoping it was Plum calling to tell me she made a mistake, I grabbed the phone and brought it up to eye level. The name on the screen surprised me.

  Elizabeth Kent. My ex-wife.

  I met Elizabeth, or Liz as she preferred to be called, in college. We were married for eight years and had two beautiful boys together. We shared so many wonderful memories. So often, however, the tragic reality of neglect eroded whatever love we had for each other. We became the classic example of a couple who both stopped working on the relationship. More often than not, we’d both come home from work simply to have dinner separately rather than suffering through prolonged silences. We stopped going on vacations and avoided anything that involved just the two of us. Looking back on it now, we both sensed what was happening but we made excuses all the same. Jobs, stress, kids, etc. It was easy to see what really happened. We were falling out of love and did nothing to try to get it back. I wonder which one of us fell out of love first. None of it mattered anyway. One day, I awoke with the honest epiphany that the way we were living wasn’t making either one of us happy. Realizing something like that wasn’t easy.

  Of course, we both considered counseling, as much as I detest the idea of therapy, but the truth was far too obvious to ignore. There was nothing left between us to save. The ending of my marriage on paper was merely a formality because it had truthfully been over for years. Not to say that it was an easy process…those things never are. I factored in a lot of positives but, in the end, it all came down to a question of happiness. And not just mine, but Liz’s too. We couldn’t continue to live that way, silently growing apart but forced to remain together by an institution that doesn’t understand that not everyone lives happily ever after. All we could do was be there for our children while trying our best to be there for each other.

  “Hello?” I answered, my voice breaking.

  “Isaac! You fucking asshole! What the fuck is wrong with you?!”

  As unwelcome the tone and choice of her words were, they did manage to bring me back to full attention. I didn’t respond right away, silently trying to ascertain the source of her anger.

  “And a good morning to you too. To what do I owe this pleasure?” I asked her, tone dripping with sarcasm.

  “Fuck you, good morning! I just got a message from a hospital saying that you were admitted down there over the weekend and they needed to speak to me as soon as possible. I called back and they just told me you were discharged but wouldn’t give me any information as to why you were there in the first place!” She took a deep breath and I realized that I’d completely forgotten to call her. “I got the message and I lost my mind, Isaac! What the hell is wrong with you?!”

  As I listened, it felt like someone punched me squarely in my gut. Liz, her husband, Brian, and the kids went camping over the holiday weekend and were well beyond any cell phone service.

  “Oh my god. Liz, I’m so sorry! I don’t even know what to say. Everything is fine. I am fine,” I tried to reassure her.

  “You had us so worried! What the hell happened to you?!”

  I decided to choose my words carefully.

  “I drank too much and passed out in the bar. Woke up in the hospital and they eventually released me,” It was the best I could come up with in a pinch. My words, however, lacked any conviction.

  “Bullshit! Don’t lie to me! There’s no way the hospital would have contacted me simply because you couldn’t hold your goddamn liquor!”

  She was probably right on that account but I couldn’t back down. Not at this point. I was certainly a mess but I didn’t want Elizabeth thinking I was going nuts too. I was supposed to have my kids the following day and the last thing I needed was for their mother to decide that I wasn’t in the proper mindset to see them. Not that she would try to keep them from me, but it was a battle I strongly preferred to avoid.

  “Elizabeth,” I said her full
name for effect, “everything is fine. I am fine. I partied a little too hard this weekend. Plum and I got into a fight so I needed to blow off some steam. I took it a bit too far. I’m sorry I didn’t call you and the kids to let you all know that I was okay. Shouldn’t have gone down like that and I am very sorry.” I didn’t want to tell her that Plum had just dumped me and I was barely keeping it together as it was.

  Elizabeth must have been measuring my words because she was quiet for a few seconds.

  “Are you using cocaine again?”

  Fuck, fuck, fuck!!

  “No Liz, please. I have a lot going on at the moment,” I said, sounding as exhausted as I felt. “But I promise you that I’m okay.”

  “I know you, Isaac, and we’ve been down that path before.” She sighed. “But if you tell me you’re okay, I’m going to believe you. So you better not be fucking lying to me!” She paused for a few moments. “And as to you and Plum, you guys seem like you’re always at odds these days; I know what it’s doing to you. Are you guys okay now?”

  I swallowed hard.

  Liz and I sometimes spoke pretty candidly about things. Even such subjects as our relationships, as odd as that might sound. Not that we would tell each other everything, but we had a relationship in which I could confide in Liz and she, in turn, offered her objective advice.

  “No, things aren’t exactly okay,” I hesitated. “In fact, she just dumped me.”

  “What?” Liz asked, astonished. “She just dumped you? Why?”

  I ended up telling her the whole story. About Tina, and how Plum left me alone on New Year’s Eve to be with Justin, and about Kelsey and waking up in the hospital to find Plum by my side. I decided to omit the details about using the cocaine, along with my tattoos moving and the dreams I’d been having. At this point, the only person who needed to know about those was me.

  “Well, I hate to be an asshole, Isaac, but you kind of had it coming,” Liz said, her tone slightly scolding. I shrugged off my irritation at her callousness.

  “Yeah, I get it,” I grumbled. “I’m having a hard enough time stomaching all the guilt and regret I have over what I did with Tina.”

  “I don’t know what goes on in your head sometimes. It’s like whenever something is going well, you go out and sabotage it.”

  I sighed because I couldn’t argue. “I’ve wished I could go back in time to that night so many times.”

  “And that, right there, is your problem,” Liz continued as I wondered why I opened myself up to her in the first place. “The sooner you realize that every decision you make has unforeseen consequences, the sooner you’ll grow up.”

  “Thanks for that, Mom,” I muttered. “For the record, I’m hating myself enough as it is so I really don’t need to hear more of it from you.”

  “Isaac, you need to take better care of yourself,” Liz continued. “Not just for you, but for your kids. I don’t like the idea of them being with you when your head isn’t in the right place.”

  She was absolutely correct. I needed to pull myself together for the boys. “You’re right,” I said. “Yes, things have been…difficult and I feel like my life is falling apart. I know how this must look to you but I promise that I’ll get through it. I’ll do it for the boys.” My throat started constricting and more tears filled my eyes. I took a deep breath and spoke but only after I had my emotions back under control. “I need the boys right now. They’re the only thing that brings me any happiness anymore. I’m excited to see them tomorrow and I know it will be good for me.”

  “I hope so.” She was firm.

  I heard little voices in the background. My heart jumped and I was filled with an overpowering warmth.

  “Would you like to speak to the kids?” Liz didn’t even have to finish the question. I was already nodding like a fool on the other side of the receiver, even though she couldn’t see me.

  “Yes, please!” I waited as I heard the phone being shuffled on the other end.

  “Hi, Dad!” Dillon. I could hear little Max in the background shouting the same.

  “Hi, guys! I’m excited to see both of you tomorrow!”

  “Me too,” he practically shouted into the phone. “Max says hi too, Dad.”

  “I can hear him, buddy. How was camping? Did you guys have a great time?”

  “Yeah, we did. So much fun.”

  “That’s great, dude! I want to hear all about it tomorrow!”

  “Are you okay, Dad?” Dillon’s voice filled with worry. “Mom said that you were sick.”

  I was ashamed as soon as he asked the question. How could I have been so stupid? So reckless as to ever make my own kids worry about me?!

  “I’m fine, buddy,” I answered as hot tears fell from my eyes. “I’m just so excited to see you both tomorrow.” It was the truth. I needed a diversion—something to take my mind off the emptiness that Plum created when she left.

  “Can’t wait to see you tomorrow, Dad.”

  “Me too, buddy. You guys have a safe drive home. I love you both.”

  “We love you too, Daddy. Bye!”

  I waited for him to hang up the phone, cherishing the sound of his voice and Max’s in the background. I didn’t want the phone call to end but my phone beeped a few times, letting me know the call had ended.

  I was alone again.

  Chapter 8

  It was dark by the time I left the office. I didn’t even realize it until I was in my car and heading out of the parking garage. I went on autopilot as I headed down the freeway, watching one freeway exit after another pass by me in a blur of green signs and black asphalt. My mind was a total void. Even as I saw my own exit quickly approaching, I realized that I didn’t want to go home now. Home had become a foreign concept to me. Home was cold, desolate and empty because Plum wasn’t there.

  Plum…

  Her name felt as sharp as a shard of glass suddenly severing my heart in two, straight down the middle. I passed my exit without as much as a glance in the rearview mirror.

  Not surprisingly, I took the exit to go to Plum’s house. It wasn’t like I had a plan or knew what I was doing because I didn’t. I just couldn’t go home. That left only one other place where I could go.

  She won’t want to see you, I warned myself but it wasn’t the inner voice that I was used to hearing. Sure, it was my own voice but the words were alien somehow—almost like someone was dropping their thoughts into my head. She broke up with you for a reason, you scumbag, my inner voice scolded me. That’s what happens when you can’t keep your dick in your pants. You fully deserve to lose your beautiful girlfriend.

  Stop! I retorted mentally before bashing my fist into the steering wheel. It honked in response as if it were affronted. Stop thinking that way! Just go to her house and talk to her! Try to convince her how wrong she is.

  The light from the street lamps illuminated the windy road, staining it with a jaundiced yellow tinge and creating a ghoulish glow. Goddammit, I needed Plum and I needed her now! No matter what, I had to convince her that we were meant to be together. I had to talk her out of pursuing this insanity. Once I did, I had to wrap myself up in her arms and hold her for a long time. Sometimes when I held Plum, I imagined us staying like that forever. For now, I had to settle for any amount of time I could get with her. There was nothing I wanted more than to curl up next to her body, pressing mine tightly against hers and savoring the wonderful sensations of her body radiating heat against mine.

  Yes! That was the answer! I thought to myself. You need to make her understand how much you love her and that you want to save this relationship!

  What relationship? That nagging, disagreeable, insecure voice continued to taunt me. You’re too stupid to see the truth, Isaac Kent.

  What truth? I demanded. By now, I was too caught up in the debate to realize I was arguing with myself, which didn’t bode well for my sanity.

  She broke up with you because she doesn’t want to be with you
anymore, dumbass! That awful voice railed back at me. Because she’s back with Justin, her ex-boyfriend – duh!

  No! I insisted but even as I forced the possibility of that happening from my mind, it still lingered. Hidden in the shadows, but still very much there.

  Don’t you get it? She fucked him on New Year’s Eve and all because he was there for her and you weren’t. Of course she’s back with him.

  I squeezed my eyes shut for a few seconds even though I was driving, and took several deep breaths before I opened them again. I turned onto Main Street which led to Bay Drive, Plum’s street. I mustered up all my courage and hoped I wasn’t making a huge mistake.

  Instantly, the anger returned. That nearly indescribable fury had taken hold of me again and in such a way that I was powerless to fight it—I couldn’t hold it back. I was all at once seeing red and my breathing hitched while my hands clenched the steering wheel like a vise.

  If he’s in her house, you’re going to kill him, the voice warned. My eyes widened in shock. I didn’t understand where those thoughts were coming from. How did they get into my mind to begin with? They seemed so foreign and alien to me, yet they definitely belonged to me.

  Jolting forward, my head and chest smashed into the steering wheel as my truck came to screeching stop. I heard the crunching sound of metal clanking as I collided with the car in front of me. What the hell just happened?! But I already knew the answer. I was stopped at a red light, waiting for the light to turn to green when the car in front of me started moving inexplicably forward. I failed to realize the light hadn’t changed colors and automatically stepped on the gas. Naturally, the car in front of me slammed on its brakes and, since no one was in front them to worry about, they just stopped. I, however, was not so fortunate. I slammed right into their trunk.

  Why the fuck not?! When it rains, it pours!

  If that were true, then it wasn’t just pouring; it was hailing. A curse of middle fingers being flashed in my general direction. Nothing seemed to be going my way lately.