Gay Fiction, Volume 1

by Mel Bossa

  “What’s the matter with her?” I asked.

  “I’m not sure. Where’s her purse?”

  I scanned the room. “I don’t know. I don’t see it.”

  “Help me find it,” Athena insisted.

  The room was bare, other than a crystal vase with a single white carnation in it. It was a token of appreciation, given to each member of the band from the club’s owner. “It’s not here, Athena.”

  “Well, did someone steal it? It’s gotta be here.”

  “Look,” I said. “There’s nothing in this room.” I poked my head into the bathroom and the small shower stall. “Or in here.”

  “What the fuck…”

  Diego appeared in the doorway then, sweaty and breathless. “What’s going on?” His eyes moved to the sofa where Mary Jane was now passed out cold. “Oh, shit. Is she all right?”

  Athena bent over Mary Jane and slapped her face lightly. “Mary Jane?” she said, loud. “What did you take? Where’s your purse?”

  “Where’s Nina?” Diego asked. “We should call someone.”

  “Athena, she doesn’t look good,” I said.

  Nina shoved her way into the room. “She’s fine.”

  “No, she’s not,” Athena said.

  “I gave her a couple of Valium before the show,” Nina explained.

  “Why would you do that?” Diego asked.

  “She didn’t want any of you to know this, but she’s been off the pills since Europe.”

  “So then why did you give her one?” Athena said.

  “She was too tense. She’s got a horrible case of stage fright. That’s why she took them to begin with.”

  “No,” Diego corrected her. “Mary Jane takes them because she’s an addict.”

  “Listen, I know for a fact she didn’t take them. I put her purse in Halo’s dressing room.”

  Then it hit me.

  “Did Halo know about that?” I asked “About the purse and the pills?”

  “Yes,” Nina explained. “Actually, it was her idea.”

  Athena caught the fear in my eyes. “Where’s Halo?”

  “She said she had something to do,” I explained. “She told me she wanted to be left alone.”

  “Oh God, not again,” Nina said, turning away from us and racing down the hall. We followed at her heels, tripping over each other.

  Nina reached the dressing room door first. She turned the knob. It was locked. She pounded on the door with her fists. “Brenda, open this door right this second! I’m your mother and you’re gonna listen to me!”

  Athena shoved her out of the way. “That’s never gonna work, Nina,” she said.

  “You got any better ideas?” Nina threw back at her.

  “As a matter of fact, I do.” Athena stepped back, raised one of her heavy black combat boots, and rammed it into the door. Hinges and screws popped off of the frame. The door burst open wide.

  “Where is she?” I heard Diego say.

  I peered inside. The dressing room was empty.

  Athena grabbed Mary Jane’s pink glittery purse from the lit up vanity table. She flipped it over and dumped out its contents. Among other things, five pill bottles tumbled out, slid off the table, hit the floor, and rolled around our feet.

  The bottles were empty.

  “My God, did she take them all?” Nina said.

  “Where in the fuck is she?” Athena added.

  Our attention collectively moved to the corner of the room, to the closed bathroom door. As if to answer our question, we heard the sound of a toilet flushing. Seconds later, the door clicked, opened, and out walked Halo. We all breathed a sigh of relief in unison.

  Halo looked at us. Then, she looked at the door.

  “What in the fuck did you guys do?” she asked. “You all look guilty.”

  “Where’s the pills?” Athena demanded, shaking Mary Jane’s purse in front of Halo’s face.

  “Jesus Christ,” she said, “calm down. I got rid of ’em. I flushed ’em down the toilet. Every single one of those fuckers is gone.”

  “Why would you do something like that?” Nina asked.

  “Because I care about Mary Jane,” she said. “Is that so difficult to believe?”

  “Yes,” Nina said with a nod, “it is.”

  Halo sat down at the vanity table. She reached out to the stem of the white carnation and slipped it out of the crystal vase. I saw drops of water fall from the bottom tip of the flower onto her black and metallic silver baby-doll dress. She closed her eyes, brought the flower to her nose, and smelled the sweet petals. “God, I love white carnations,” she said.

  “What’s the matter with you?” Nina asked. “Are you on something now?”

  “She’s sober,” I said in her defense.

  “Lover boy’s right,” she said, tossing me a wink. “Fortunately, I didn’t get forced to take one of my mother’s Valiums. You used to love to give them to me…remember, Mom?”

  “Now isn’t the time for this, Brenda.”

  “I would appreciate it if you would address me by my professional name. Since you get twenty percent of everything I make, you owe me that much. My name is Halo Jet. And you can’t deny the diet pills you shoved down my throat when I was twelve for the beauty pageants you made me compete in. The tranquilizers when I tried to fight you. Or what about the two weeks you locked me up in that mental hospital and you told all of your friends I was away teaching dance classes at a summer camp for children with leukemia?”

  Diego locked eyes with his manager. “My God, Nina…you did that?”

  Halo smirked and rubbed the flower against her chin. “I can’t make this shit up.”

  “This isn’t the time or the place,” Nina huffed.

  “You’re a lousy manager,” Halo told her, “and you’re an even worse mother.”

  “I’ve only wanted the best for you,” she replied. “Just like any parent would.”

  “Well, I don’t think you’ll be winning any Mother of the Year awards anytime soon,” Halo said.

  She stood up. She looked at me. “Hey, lover boy, will you hand me my sweater and my purse? They’re probably on the floor somewhere, since they were hanging on the back of the door before you maniacs decided to break it down.”

  I found her beaded bag and her white cashmere button-up sweater and handed them to her.

  “I’m leaving now,” she said to us, “but before I go, there’s something you should probably know.”

  We were hanging on her every word. Her charisma was so powerful, none of us could take our eyes off of her. We were riveted by every movement she made, each breath she took. I understood the meaning of the phrase star quality. Halo Jet not only possessed it, she was the epitome of it.

  Maybe that’s why I was so shocked by what she said next.

  “As of this moment,” she began, “I am no longer a member of this band. I quit. I resign. I’m out.”

  “What?” Athena said. “What the fuck are you talking about?”

  “I’ll be working at a restaurant starting next week,” Halo said.

  “The hell you are,” Nina protested.

  “It’s my choice,” Halo insisted, locking eyes with her mother. “My mind is made up. The album hasn’t been recorded yet. There’s still time. Go find another girl singer. I’m staying here in Los Angeles. Just like Johnette sings, I’m still in Hollywood.”

  “You’re quitting the band to become a waitress?” Athena said. “This is unbelievable.”

  “Are you out of your fucking mind?” Nina roared.

  Halo shrugged and simply said, “Pancakes. I love pancakes.”

  “Then we’ll buy you some,” Diego offered. “We’ll take you to IHOP whenever you want. Nina can ask them to sponsor the whole fucking tour for you.”

  “You’re sweet, Diego,” she said. “Stay that way.”

  “You’re just gonna leave, Brenda?” Athena asked. “Just like that? After everything?”

  “You guys will make it without
me. I know you will.”

  “Are you sure about this?” I asked her. “Is that what you really want?”

  “I took what little money I’ve earned so far with this band and I went and bought myself a restaurant. A little pancake house. You should come and see it sometime. It’s by the beach.”

  With that, Halo walked out of the dressing room. Nina, Diego, Athena, and I scrambled into the hallway to catch our last glimpse of the former queen.

  We were there just in time to watch her dramatic exit.

  Halo pushed open the emergency exit door and set off the alarm.

  Chapter Twenty-one

  The next morning, Athena, Diego, and I arrived at the Geneva Recording Studios on Sunset Boulevard. The small bungalow styled building seemed quaint, almost like an ivy-covered cottage from a fairy tale.

  We stood in the claustrophobic lobby, surrounded by wood-paneled walls covered with framed autographed photos of famous singers who’d recorded there. From the lobby, a narrow hallway led to the actual studios. From one of them, Mary Jane emerged with her pink bass guitar strapped around her neck. Her white-blond hair was pulled back into a loose ponytail. She was wearing gym shorts, flip-flops, and a tank top. She looked rested, ready to work.

  “Hi, guys,” she said with a smile.

  Who is this person? She’s actually alert and aware of what’s happening in the universe.

  Nina stepped in front of Mary Jane, intercepting her friendliness and replacing it with the icy glare in her gray eyes. She was wearing blue jeans, a sequined green Christmas sweatshirt, and miniature wreaths for earrings. “The three of you are late,” she grumbled. She turned to me and added, “Including you.”

  “The 405 was insane,” Athena explained, her car keys still in hand. “I got us here as fast as I could, Nina. We live in Redondo…remember?”

  Diego hadn’t said much to Athena and me all morning or last night. He’d retreated from the world and was deep in thought. His body was tense. His mood was dark. I let him have his space. I knew it was just a matter of time before he imploded.

  “I’ve been on the phone all morning with the record label and our attorneys,” Nina began. “We have a contract and we have to honor it. Studio time has been booked. Promotional appearances have been planned. Your first single is flying up the charts.”

  “What exactly are you saying?” Diego asked.

  “I’m saying the band has to go on…with or without my daughter. We have an album to deliver. I say we get started on it right away.”

  “Are you still our manager?” Athena asked. “I thought…I figured…”

  “I’m not quitting just because Halo did,” she informed us. “I’m not running off to the nearest pancake house like some nut job. I see the potential here.”

  “Is it because of the money we’re making?” Diego asked. “The money we stand to make? We’re not a band anymore. We’re a product. That’s all we’ve ever been to you.”

  “Hey, Athena asked me to do this, to be here,” Nina reminded him. “I didn’t want to take this job. I was perfectly happy living my life.”

  “I figured it was a good idea at the time, Nina,” she said. “You’re the only one who can reel Halo in and keep a handle on her. But she’s gone now.”

  “And we’re still a band,” Mary Jane chimed in.

  “Don’t think for a second you can toss me out,” Nina warned, directing most of her words to Diego. “Just like you, I’m under contract. And I’m not going anywhere. Now…we have some studio time booked this morning. We have a flight to catch to New York tomorrow. The three of you need to focus on recording some tracks today. Let me handle the lead singer issue.”

  “What issue are you talking about?” Diego pushed.

  “Obviously we need a new lead singer.”

  “Replace Halo? Just like that?” he snapped.

  “You got any better ideas? I gotta work fast because the band has been booked on a late-night talk show tomorrow. You can thank me later.”

  “For what?” Diego asked. “For having no respect for us?”

  “For making shit happen for the three of you. Before I came along you were busking down at the Third Street Promenade.”

  “I’m beginning to think maybe that life wasn’t so bad,” he said. “Maybe Halo was right.”

  “Don’t threaten me, Diego,” Nina said, holding an index finger up for emphasis.

  “Or what?” he yelled. “You’re going to forget to tell me that someone else died?”

  Nina folded her arms across her chest. “I did what I had to do.”

  “And so did your daughter. And so will I. I don’t give a fuck about being famous!”

  “Blame me for everything if it’s easier,” she said. “Go on. I can take it.”

  “I’ll never forgive you for the two days you waited to tell me about my mother. I should’ve been there, Nina. Not in some bar in Europe performing to a bunch of drunk assholes.”

  “I did it because I care about this band.”

  His voice filled every inch of the space around us. “You did it for the money!”

  Diego turned and shoved the glass door open with such force, I almost expected it to shatter. He stepped out onto Sunset Boulevard and started to walk away.

  Nina looked at me. “Can you please do something about him?”

  “What do you want me to do?”

  “He’s your boyfriend, for fuck’s sake. Go stop him for making the biggest mistake of his life.” Nina turned away from us and stormed off to one of the studios, slamming the door shut behind her.

  “Come on,” Athena said to me. “I’ll go with you.”

  Mary Jane blinked a few times. “Um…Athena? What should I do?”

  “Meditate,” she suggested.

  *

  “Everything’s a mess and I don’t know how to fix it,” Athena confided while we walked down Sunset Boulevard, searching for Diego. Even though it was December, it felt like a summer day. “None of this was supposed to happen.”

  “What do you want to do, Athena?” I asked. “Do you want to walk away from this?”

  “Fuck no,” she said. “I’ve worked my ass off, Justin. I’ve invested everything I’ve got into this band. I’m not just talking about cash from those rich bastards. This band is my life.”

  “Can you guys survive without Halo?”

  She stopped suddenly in her steps. I did the same. We turned to face each other. “That’s what I wanted to talk to you about.”

  “Me?” I said. “About what?”

  “About this whole lead singer issue,” she said. “I have an idea, but it can’t happen without you. I need your help.”

  “Tell me what you want me to do.”

  *

  We found Diego sitting at a sidewalk table outside of a place called the Coffee Bean and Tea Leaf. He looked up when he saw us approaching. I glanced down at his left hand and noticed he was holding his father’s dog tags.

  “Look, I’m sorry,” he began. “I’m sorry, Athena, because I know what you’ve done to make this band happen.” He turned to me. “And I’m sorry I dragged you into this craziness.”

  “I’m here because I want to be here,” I reminded him. “And because I love you.”

  Athena gave him a playful punch in the shoulder. “And I’m here because I’m a pissed-off dyke drummer and I need my guitar player and my best friend to get back to work so we can make some beautiful noise together.”

  “But how?” he asked.

  “We’ve come up with a solution,” I said, as I’d promised Athena just moments ago that I would.

  I breathed in deep. The smell of coffee permeating the air made me incredibly homesick. I missed Starsky. And Hutch. And Clouds. And Chicago. I missed standing behind the espresso machine and making an outstanding cappuccino. I missed my life.

  I need an iced chai tea latte. And some peace of mind, please. And for my boyfriend to think Athena’s plan is a brilliant one. Because it is.

&nbs
p; Diego looked to both of us for an explanation. “Well,” he said, “what’s your idea?”

  “I don’t think we need a new lead singer,” Athena offered.

  He looked at her like she was insane. “How is that even possible?”

  I sat down in an empty chair beside him. I placed my hand over his, looked him in the eyes, and said, “You should be the lead singer of the Jetsetters.”

  Chapter Twenty-two

  Diego hated the idea. He insisted he was a guitar player, not a singer. He didn’t crave attention from the public or the media. He didn’t want to be in the center of the spotlight.

  He just wanted to play guitar.

  However, he did agree to return to the studios—once I ordered an iced chai tea latte—and record the music tracks for two songs, including the one he’d written about me that was tentatively titled “Justin.”

  He and Nina didn’t say a word to each other. She kept her distance and let the band do their thing in the studio. I sat in the control room next to a six-foot-something handsome African American man named Boston McMurray, a music producer working for the record label that signed the Jetsetters. Boston looked like a bouncer for a nightclub. He had the deepest speaking voice I’d ever heard. He was intimidating at first, but sitting next to him I soon realized he was a gentle giant.

  Nina was infatuated with the poor guy. She kept finding every excuse possible to make an appearance in the control room. She even offered to rub his shoulders because she was certain he was sore from working so hard for so many hours.

  Boston liked the attention from her and flirted back. If we weren’t heading to New York in the morning, I’m sure the two of them would’ve hooked up.

  Maybe if they did, she’d be in a better mood.

  At least for a while.

  *

  We didn’t return to the condo until after midnight. Exhaustion had set in hours ago and we were now bordering on the edges of delirium.