Destroying the Soul (Destroyed Book 2)

by L. Grubb

  Three years ago

  I lean forward, placing my forearms on my knees but keeping my eyes in the same direction; hyperaware of my surroundings. That’s the most important thing while in prison; to keep your wits about you. Someone can come out of nowhere and shank you without warning. I’ve watched it happen several times now and I’m determined that it won’t be me lying in a pool of my own blood.

  My eyes squint as I stare at the guy opposite me who stands all the way over the other side of the yard against the fence. He’s been in for a couple of weeks now and he’s made some new friends, friends which ain’t the good variety. He’s grating on my last damn nerve though because every opportunity he’s had, he stares at me.

  I raise my brow at him, silently asking him what the fuck he’s staring at, his answering smirk tells me that he’s seen my question and he pushes off from the fence, stalking toward me.

  “Coming your way, bro,” Jack tells me from behind. I tilt my head in acknowledgement and straighten my back.

  He swaggers closer, two of his guys at his back and comes to a stop about five feet in front of me, then crosses his arms over his chest trying but failing to intimidate me.

  His eyes are almost black and his face is the epitome of evil. I can only imagine what he’s in here for. I’ve learned not to ask why people are here, let’s just say it doesn’t go down very well.

  I stay quiet as he stares at me. I don’t intend to start a conversation with him, he approached me so if he wants to talk then he should start real soon.

  “Jay, right?”

  “Who wants to know?” I ask.

  “Jay Frazier.” He smirks and winks. “Just wanted to talk to the guy who was hanging out with my little sister.”

  I know I shouldn’t take his bait but I can’t stop the words coming out of my mouth. “Sister?” I ask, trying to work out what he’s saying while berating myself for asking him.

  “Yeah, Jasmine.” He raises a brow as the side of his mouth kicks up into another smirk.

  My breathing picks up and my hands clench into fists as I stand slowly, realizing that he’s the one who was causing her pain; hurting her. “You’re the bastard who’s been hurting her?”

  “Well, depends what you define by hurting.” He chuckles, looking to his guys who do the same. “If you mean by fucking her when she’s screaming at me to stop.” He shrugs, nonchalantly. “Then sure.”

  “What?” I seethe, the veins in my arms popping to the surface of my skin. I can feel my face burning with anger and I go over what he’s said in my head to make sure I heard him correctly, and yep, I fucking did.

  My fist flies at his face faster than the eye can see, connecting with his temple and he goes down to the floor, the back of his head banging off the concrete ground. I pounce on him, reigning my fists down on his face as shouting erupts around me.

  The edges of my vision darken as I pummel his face over and over until arms come around me and drag me off him.

  “Stop, Frazier, before I put your ass in seg!” one of the guard’s shouts down my ear. I struggle against the hold he has on me and try to dive at the piece of shit again as he gets up off the ground.

  He spits a mouthful of blood out and laughs manically. “Sucks that you’re in here and she’s out there. Can’t protect her now, can you? I made sure of that.”

  “What the fuck did you say?” I growl, my mind spinning. Is he the reason I’m in here? The reason why I couldn’t even tell Jas that I haven’t abandoned her, that I never would have left her, especially not after she told me what he was doing to her. Although she failed to tell me what she was actually going through. All this time she was suffering at his hands in a way that I can’t even comprehend. I was under the impression that he was only physically and mentally abusing her, not doing… that.

  “Ahhh! You’re putting it together now,” he goads. “Just know that if I want something done, it’ll get done.”

  I lunge at him again and the guard hurls me back, making me stumble and lose my footing. We both go down and still I don’t stop struggling. I need to get to him, I need to let my anger out on the person who’s done this to me... to Jas.

  “That’s it!” the guard shouts. “Your ass is in seg!”

  Fuck! I don’t want to be stuck inside those four concrete walls for days on end. I never know what time of day it is without the daylight shining through and as there are no windows, it fucks up all concept of time. My thoughts are never ending in there and I drive myself insane with the ‘what ifs’ that run through my mind.

  Everyone in the yard scatters as we’re both yanked up off the floor and I turn to face the guard. “Please don’t put me in there,” I beg.

  “I warned you, Frazier,” he says, his mouth in a grim line.

  I turn my head to where he stands at the fence and grind my teeth together, he better hope he’s not in the same yard as me again because I’ll kill him with my bare hands and do life for it without a second thought.

  Present

  I sit in the metal chair, waiting for him to wake up. He’s been out cold for a couple of hours now and the blood has stemmed somewhat, no longer pouring out of his mouth like an erupting volcano. No, now it’s just a slight dribble. I track it as it weaves its way over the dried blood on his jaw, down his neck and onto his naked chest.

  Considering he spent just as long in prison as I did, he clearly didn’t use it to his advantage. I have no doubt that he’s strong in his own way but compared to me and many other guys that were in there, he’s scrawny.

  My eyes scroll down his body, taking him all in. I had Ryan strip off his clothes once he had passed out, he wasn’t happy about having to do it but I don’t give a flying rats ass. This evil son of a bitch hurt Jas in ways that somebody should never experience and I’m here to make sure he gets his punishment.

  In this instance, I’m the Judge, Jury and Executioner.

  A noise vibrates in the back of his throat and I watch him intently, waiting for him to fully wake. His eyes pop open, the fear evident in them as he looks straight at me. He mumbles something and I chuckle, lifting my hand up to my ear.

  “Sorry, what was that?”

  The more he tries to say something the more blood flows out of his mouth. It takes him several seconds to realize that he’s making it worse and when he finally stops, he looks down at himself, whimpering.

  “Ready, motherfucker?” I sneer, standing slowly and twirling the baseball bat in my hand.

  I stop a few feet away, turning to the side and making eye contact with Ryan.

  “Remember back in school? How many times did I hit a homerun?”

  He looks up, his face serious and then shrugs. “Too many to fucking count.”

  Craning my head back to Louis, I raise my brows and say, “I was one of the best hitters.” I let that sink in before I raise the bat over my shoulder, widening my stance and bending my knees.

  “This may hurt.” I chuckle.

  I take a calming breath, allowing myself to feel as if the bat is an extension of me. That’s the key to getting the best hit on the ball - or in my case - dick and balls.

  The bat goes flying through the air with a whoosh and hits him straight in his junk. Considering he doesn’t have a tongue anymore, the noise he makes still fills the empty warehouse. Tears spring to his eyes and he shakes his head, trying to get away from me but he can’t, I made sure that I can have him how I want him and right now, I’m gonna make sure that his dick isn’t in working order ever again. It doesn’t matter that he’ll be dead soon, I want to cause him the most amount of pain that I possibly can.

  I swing my arm up again, letting my elbow drop and hitting him even harder, his dick shrivels up, trying to protect itself but there’s no way it can. I swing the bat again, and again, and again. I swing it so many times that I start to get that delicious burn in my muscles.

  I don’t look anywhere but at his dick and when I finally stop, I relish in the fact that it no longer looks any
thing like it should. It’s so swollen and mangled, he’ll never be able to use it again.

  His head lolls to the side, noises coming from his throat that are unnatural for a human being and I let the bat go, the clunk as it hits the floor echoing around us.

  I see his chest rise and fall, obvious relief flowing through him, but there’s absolutely no fucking way that I’m stopping yet. I move over to the wooden work bench that sits off to the left and cross my arms over my chest, looking at all the tools that I have available to me.

  My fingers run over the metal edge of the sledgehammer and I move my head slightly, looking at Louis over my shoulder. He looks like he’s given up, like he doesn’t care about anything anymore and that isn’t how I want him to be. I want him to want to fight me, I need to rile him up; to get him alert.

  My hand wraps around the wooden handle and I pick up the sledgehammer, the weight of it straining my tired arms, but I won’t let that stop me; I won’t let anything stop me.

  I take a few steps toward him, cocking my head to the side and staring straight into his eyes.

  “Louis, Louis, Louis,” I tut. “Looks like we’ve given up and we can’t have that now can we?” He doesn’t reply, doesn’t make a sound so I step closer. “I wonder what your sister would do if she was here?”

  His eyes widen at the mention of his sister and I know then that she’s the only one who will get me a reaction from him.

  “I think she’d want me to kill you outright, save you from all the pain.” He nods his head in a reply and I tighten my hand around the sledgehammer. “She wouldn’t want you to suffer, no matter how much you tortured her over the years. No matter how much pain you caused her.”

  The hope in his eyes screams at me, begging me to stop even if his voice can’t. The sight of it has my body humming and I lift the sledgehammer, bringing it down on one of his kneecaps and relishing in the pop and crunch of his bones. He tries his best to cry for help but that soon stops when I throw it at his other knee, eliciting the same glorious sound as the first.

  I drop that to the floor, letting it sit right next to the baseball bat. My chest is heaving and I struggle to catch a full breath, the adrenaline coursing through me making me feel like I could do anything right about now. And I can, I can do anything I want and not one person will stop me.

  Jas had her dignity taken away from her, she was in the hands of a monster and had zero control, now he’s starting to realize what that’s like because now he’s in my hands and I’m gonna make sure that he knows exactly what it’s like to have your choices taken away from you.

  I spin around so fast that I nearly cause myself to fall over, righting myself I make a mad dash for the broom that sits against the wall, bringing my knee up and snapping it over my thigh. My footsteps coupled with his throaty moans of pain are the only sounds in the warehouse as I walk behind him, grimacing at his naked ass. I don’t want to do this but he needs to know, he needs to know exactly how it feels to have that choice taken away.

  “You violated your sister in the worst way possible. Are you ready to feel what she did, asshole?” I sneer, reeling my arm back and pushing the stick of the broom upwards.

  He howls at the intrusion and my temper flares up. “That’s exactly what she felt like having her choices taken away from her, you did this to her time after time!” I roar. “You didn’t care that she was begging for you to stop.” My chest heaves as I take a breath. “You carried on, time and time again, taking what wasn’t yours to take!” I close my eyes, gathering myself. “I’m going to enjoy watching the life drain out of you as you realize just what it feels like to be helpless.”

  His head rolls forward, his body giving up the fight and passing out. My eyes turn to Ryan as he moves forward and comes back into the only light that shines in here.

  “Well,” he murmurs, clearing his throat and not able to look at either me or Louis. “I think you may need a break.”

  I look down at the message that Jas sent me several hours ago and start typing a reply. I start and stop so many times that I end up throwing my cell down onto the sofa as I lean back, slamming my eyes shut. I’d been at the warehouse for almost twenty-four hours straight and I wanted to stay longer but Ryan practically pushed me out of there, telling me to go home and get a shower and some sleep.

  Now that I’m home, in the silence and left to my own thoughts, I wish I would have stayed at the warehouse. It’s too Goddamn quiet here and my thoughts run rampant.

  I want to see Jas but part of me is afraid that she’ll know what I did. That she’ll know who I really am, someone who can inflict pain to the nth degree and not bat an eyelid.

  I sigh, scrubbing my hands over my face and hair, picking my cell back up

  Hey, beautiful. I’m good, how’s being back at the dorms? J x

  I place my cell down on the table as I lift off the sofa and pad through to the kitchen, grabbing a beer. I pop the top and lean against the counter just as my cell vibrates on the table. I almost dive over the sofa to get to it and when I do, I open up the message and chuckle at Jas’ reply.

  Good, Callie just tired herself out dancing and now I’m sat staring at the wall while she snores. X

  My fingers fly over the keypad as I type a reply.

  So? Did you dance? I remember your ‘dancing’ lol. J x

  I smirk at my cell as I see three dots appear and I wait with bated breath as they flicker on and off the screen.

  Hey! You loved my dancing! x

  I sure did ;) J x

  I reply on automatic and then I start to wonder if I should have sent that. She wanted you to be normal, to stop treating her like a china doll, I berate myself.

  LOL! My spice girls dancing was the best! x

  I stare at my cell, wondering what to say next. I don’t want to be overzealous with her but at the same time I want to go back to normal. I want to see her as her again and not as that frightened woman at the hands of Louis, battered and beaten both inside and out.

  I would kill for a burger right now lol x

  Her message pings on my cell and I’m up on my feet and grabbing my keys before I know it. If she wants a burger then I’ll get her a burger, hell, if she wants the moon I’d die trying to get her the fucking moon.

  I head straight to the drive thru and pick her up a burger, fries and drink, and the same for me, before I head to her dorm building.

  This is the first step to being normal with her again. I don’t want to look back at the past with her and I don’t want to bring it up. I want to move forward but I know that to do that, I need to tell her what happened back then.

  I’m outside, complete with a burger :)

  I see that she’s read the message and I wait, watching the doors for her to come out of them. She appears after about a minute, a silly smile on her face as first until she tries to jog down the stairs and grimaces, holding her side. She makes it down the stairs and into the car, her breath catching as she maneuvers.

  “What are you doing?” she asks.

  “Well, I wouldn’t want anyone to die for your burger needs.” I chuckle, handing her the burger.

  She takes it and pulls it out of the wrapper, taking a bite and moaning loudly. “Oh, God! I needed this.”

  “Yeah?” I smirk, opening my own and taking a bite. Her moan is justified as the juicy burger complete with ketchup and mustard hits my tongue. Damn, that’s a good burger.

  “This is good,” I tell her, my mouth full of the deliciousness.

  She snorts and shakes her head, taking another bite and relaxing back in the seat.

  I open my mouth to tell her what happened, why I disappeared out of the blue all those years ago but my stomach dips and I lose my nerve, deciding to leave it until I’m done with Louis. Once he’s gone, I can tell her and then hopefully we can start a fresh.

  I catch her eye and smile, placing my hand over hers where it rests on her thigh and squeezing gently.

  Everything will be okay, it has to b
e because I can’t lose her again. I’ll do anything to stay by her side.

  The silence in the car is comfortable, the sound of the wrappers from the burgers rustling is the only sound in the confined space. I can’t believe he went and got me a burger. Who does that? Pretty sure Dante would have just told Callie to ‘F off’. I chuckle to myself at the thought.

  “What’s so funny?” Jay asks, giving me a quizzical look.

  “Nothing. Just a thought that crossed my mind about Callie and Dante.” I smile at him and place a finger on the creases that have formed because of his frowning. “These will be permanent if the wind changes and you carry on frowning.”

  “You actually believe that shit?” The rumble of his laugh resonates through the car and causes goosebumps to rise along my skin. I love that sound, I don’t think I can ever live without it again.

  “Do you really have to curse?” I ignore his question, I don’t want him to think I’m childish.

  “Why do you hate it so much?” What is this? Deflect from questions day of something?

  “Would be great if you’d actually answer the question I already asked you, Jay.” I narrow my eyes at him playfully.

  “Fine. I curse because I like to. Like the whole human race does. Why do you have such a problem with it? It doesn’t harm people if you’re not directing it at them.” His reply is fair. I mean, I know I hate using words that are disgusting, doesn’t mean others can’t. I should stop being so judgmental… especially considering I do curse sometimes; at appropriate times. Other people have the right if they want to and I shouldn’t be nagging at people not to.

  “I just don’t like the vileness, the foulness and the disgustingness of the words. Especially the C word. That makes me cringe. It’s such a hate filled word.” I really do hate that word. It makes my skin crawl. I guess, the main reason I hate the word is because Louis always called me it.

  Burgers finished, we ball up the wrappers and throw them in the bag they came in. “Well, thanks for the burger. I really freakin’ needed that.” A genuine smile beams from my face as I turn to face him but it drops at his expression. He looks distant, like his head is somewhere else while his body is still in the car with me. “Um… are you okay?”