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Odd Girl Out

Page 44

by Rachel Simmons


  Hoffman, Jan, [>]

  hooks, bell, [>]–[>]

  Hope (student), [>]–[>]

  humiliation, [>], [>], [>], [>], [>]

  humor, jokes, [>], [>]–[>], [>], [>], [>], [>], [>], [>]

  hypersensitivity, [>]–[>], [>]–[>]

  hypocrisy. See duplicity

  "ideal" girl, characteristics, [>]–[>]

  identity, female, [>], [>], [>], [>], [>], [>]

  "I'm so fat" (code word), [>]–[>]

  indirection, indirect aggression, [>]–[>], [>], [>], [>], [>], [>]–[>], [>]–[>]

  injustice, fighting, [>]–[>]

  insecurity. See alliance building; popularity; relational aggression

  instant messaging, [>]–[>], [>], [>], [>], [>]

  insults, public, [>]–[>], [>], [>], [>]–[>], [>], [>], [>], [>], [>]. See also code words; social media

  interventions

  anti-bullying policies and programs, [>], [>], [>]–[>], [>]–[>]

  bodily harm standard, [>]

  changing school and friends, [>]–[>]

  by educators, school authorities, [>]–[>], [>]–[>], [>]–[>], [>]–[>]

  protocol for, [>]–[>]

  and speaking truth to power, [>]–[>]

  See also parents and guardians

  intimacy

  and anger, [>], [>], [>]

  and female friendships, [>], [>]–[>], [>]

  and social media, [>]–[>]

  Iris (mother), [>]

  isolation

  as consequence of bullying, [>], [>]–[>], [>], [>], [>]–[>]

  fear of, [>]–[>], [>], [>], [>]–[>], [>]–[>]

  self-awareness as consequence of, [>]–[>]

  self-imposed, [>], [>], [>]

  See also silent treatment

  "it's a phase," [>]

  Jackie (student), [>]–[>]

  Jacobs, Connie (mother), [>]–[>]

  Jacobs, Kelsey. See Kelsey (student)

  Jacqueline (student), [>], [>]–[>], [>]

  Jane (student), [>], [>]

  Janet (adult), [>]–[>]

  Jasmine (student), [>], [>]–[>]

  Jawbreaker (movie), [>], [>]

  jealousy, [>], [>]–[>], [>]–[>], [>]–[>], [>]–[>]

  Jennifer (student), [>], [>]

  Jenny (roommate), [>]–[>], [>]–[>], [>]

  Jenny (student), [>]–[>], [>]–[>], [>], [>]

  Jessica (student), [>]–[>], [>]–[>], [>]–[>], [>], [>]

  Jessie (student), [>]

  Jill (student), [>], [>]–[>], [>]

  Joanna (student), [>]–[>]

  Johnston, Jessie (student), [>], [>]

  Johnston, Paula (mother), [>]–[>]

  Johnston, Susie (student), [>], [>]

  jokes. See humor, jokes

  Judith (student), [>]–[>], [>]

  Julie (student), [>]–[>]

  Juliet (student), [>]

  Kaminski, Kim (counselor), [>], [>]

  Kaplan, Chloe (student), [>]–[>]

  Kaplan, Margaret. See Margaret (mother)

  Karen (student), [>]

  Kate (student), [>]–[>]

  Kathy (student), [>]–[>], [>]

  Katie (student), [>]

  Kayla (student), [>]

  Keisha (student), [>], [>], [>], [>]–[>], [>]

  Keller, Tasha (student), [>]–[>], [>]–[>]

  Kelly (student), [>]–[>], [>], [>], [>]–[>], [>]

  Kelsey (student), [>]–[>]

  Keltner, Dacher, [>]

  Kendra (teacher), [>]–[>]

  Kenya (student), [>]

  Kim (student), [>], [>]

  kindergarten, [>], [>], [>]

  Lacey (student), [>], [>]

  Lambert, Erin. See Erin (student)

  language

  inflammatory, [>]

  for discussing bullying, [>], [>], [>], [>]

  See also code words; insults; nonverbal communication

  Latinas, [>], [>], [>]–[>], [>]–[>], [>]

  Laura (student), [>]

  Lauren (student), [>]–[>], [>]–[>], [>], [>], [>]

  leadership behaviors, [>], [>], [>]–[>], [>]–[>]

  Leah (student), [>], [>], [>]–[>], [>]

  legislation, [>], [>], [>], [>]

  Leslie (student), [>], [>]

  Levine, Madeline, [>]

  Lexie (student), [>]

  Limber, Susan, [>]–[>]

  Linda (mother), [>], [>], [>]–[>]

  Lindsey (student), [>]–[>], [>]–[>], [>]

  Lisa (student), [>], [>], [>]–[>]

  listening, [>], [>]–[>], [>]

  "Listening Guide" (Brown and Gilligan), [>]

  Liu, Kathy (student). See Kathy (student)

  Lori (student), [>]–[>]

  loss, fear of

  and abandonment, [>], [>]–[>], [>]–[>], [>], [>]–[>], [>]

  and alliance building, [>], [>]

  and the politics of popularity, [>]–[>]

  and showing leadership, [>]–[>]

  and tolerance of bullying, [>], [>]–[>], [>], [>]–[>], [>]

  See also alliance building; relational aggression

  low-income girls, stereotypes and myths about, [>]

  Lucia (student), [>]–[>], [>], [>]

  Lynn (school counselor), [>]–[>]

  Mackenzie (student), [>]–[>]

  Maggie (student), [>], [>], [>]–[>]

  Mallory (student), [>]

  manipulation

  as bullying, [>], [>]–[>], [>]–[>], [>]–[>], [>]

  and female sexuality, femininity, [>]–[>], [>]

  by mothers of bullies, [>]

  and popularity, [>], [>]

  using social media, [>]–[>], [>]

  manly women, [>]

  Marcie (student), [>]

  Margaret (mother), [>], [>]–[>]

  Maria (student), [>]

  Marilyn (teacher), [>]–[>]

  Marissa (student), [>]–[>]

  Martin, Leah. See Leah (student)

  Mary (mother), [>]

  Mary (student), [>], [>]

  Maryann (teacher), [>]–[>]

  masculinity, [>], [>], [>]–[>], [>]

  Maura (student), [>]–[>]

  McCullough, Shelley, [>], [>]

  meals, family, [>]

  meanness, mean girls

  asking question about, [>]

  ignoring, [>]–[>]

  as relational aggression, [>]–[>], [>]–[>]

  repressing, [>], [>], [>], [>]–[>]

  See also girl bullying

  mediators, "middlegirls," [>]–[>]

  Meeting at the Crossroads (Brown and Gilligan), [>]

  Megan (student), [>], [>]–[>], [>]–[>], [>]

  Meghan (student), [>], [>]–[>]

  Melanie (student), [>], [>]

  Melissa (student), [>], [>], [>], [>]–[>]

  Meredith (student), [>]–[>]

  Michelle (student), [>]–[>], [>]–[>], [>], [>]

  middle-class communities, [>], [>], [>]–[>]

  middlegirls, [>]–[>], [>], [>]–[>]

  middle school, [>], [>]–[>], [>]–[>]

  Miller, Allison, [>]–[>]

  minority identity, [>]

  Miranda (student), [>]

  modesty, [>], [>], [>]

  Mollie (student), [>]

  Molly (student), [>]–[>]

  mothers, [>], [>]–[>], [>]–[>], [>]–[>]. See also parents and guardians

  multitasking, [>], [>]

  name-calling, [>], [>], [>]. See also code words; insults

  Nancy (student), [>], [>]–[>]

  Naomi (student), [>], [>], [>], [>], [>]

  Natalie (student), [>]–[>], [>]

  new students, hostile response to, [>], [>]–[>]

  niceness

  appearance of, and covert bullying, [>], [>]

  assumptions about, [>], [>]–[>]

  deemphasizing, [>]

  femininity and, [>]–[>], [>], [>]

  and "good" leaders
, [>]–[>]

  Nicki (student), [>], [>]

  Nicola (student), [>], [>]

  Nicole (student), [>], [>], [>], [>]–[>], [>]

  Nikki (student), [>]–[>]

  noninterference strategy, [>]–[>], [>]

  nonverbal communication

  and covert aggression, [>], [>], [>], [>], [>]

  expressing anger/contempt, [>], [>], [>], [>], [>], [>]–[>]

  and online communications, [>]–[>]

  and relational aggression, [>]–[>], [>], [>]–[>]

  normal, acting, [>]–[>]

  note passing, [>], [>], [>], [>], [>], [>], [>], [>], [>]. See also social media

  Noura (student), [>], [>]

  Ntozake (administrator), [>]–[>]

  nurturers, girls as, [>], [>]–[>], [>], [>], [>], [>], [>], [>]

  Nydia (student), [>]

  Olweus, Dan, Olweus Bullying Prevention Program, [>], [>]–[>]

  Omeggle website, [>]

  oppression, experience of, [>]

  Orenstein, Peggy, [>], [>], [>]

  ostracism. See alliance building; cliques; exclusion

  othermothers, [>]

  panic, panic attacks, [>], [>], [>], [>], [>], [>], [>]

  "parent covenant," [>]

  parents and guardians

  and alliance building, [>], [>]–[>]

  bullying by, [>]–[>]

  bullying of, [>]

  communications with schools, [>]–[>], [>]–[>], [>]–[>]

  defensiveness of, [>]–[>], [>], [>]

  fear of confrontation/silence, [>], [>]–[>], [>]–[>], [>], [>], [>]

  feeling helpless, [>], [>], [>]–[>], [>]

  feeling shame or anger, [>], [>]–[>], [>]–[>]

  hiding bullying from, [>]–[>], [>], [>], [>], [>], [>], [>], [>]–[>], [>], [>]

  interventions/responses by, [>]–[>], [>]–[>], [>], [>]–[>], [>], [>]–[>], [>]–[>], [>]–[>]

  labeling of, [>]

  need for honest communications, [>], [>]–[>]

  providing empathy and support, [>], [>]–[>], [>]–[>], [>]–[>]

  role in girls' bullying, [>], [>]–[>], [>]–[>], [>]–[>]

  setting limits, [>]–[>], [>]–[>], [>]–[>]

  supervising use of social media, [>], [>]–[>], [>]–[>], [>], [>]–[>]

  passions, discovering, [>]–[>], [>]–[>]

  passivity, [>], [>], [>], [>], [>], [>]–[>], [>], [>]. See also manipulation

  passwords, [>], [>]

  Patchin, Justin, [>]–[>], [>]

  Patricia (mother), [>]–[>]

  Patterson, Natalie. See Natalie (student)

  Patterson, Susan (mother), [>], [>]

  peer pressure, [>]

  Peralta, Carmen (student), [>]–[>], [>], [>]

  perfection, perfectionism, [>], [>], [>]–[>], [>]–[>], [>]–[>], [>], [>], [>]–[>], [>]–[>], [>], [>]

  Petra (mother), [>], [>]–[>]

  physical aggression, [>]–[>], [>], [>], [>]

  physical ailments, [>]

  Pipher, Mary, [>], [>]

  Play Like a Man, Win Like a Woman (Evans), [>]

  Popular (TV show), [>], [>]

  popularity

  and alliance building, [>], [>]–[>], [>]

  attaining, proving, [>], [>], [>]–[>]

  and dating, [>]–[>]

  and fitting in, belonging, [>], [>], [>], [>]–[>], [>], [>], [>], [>]

  importance, [>], [>], [>], [>], [>]

  politics of, [>], [>]–[>], [>]–[>]

  resentment of, [>]–[>], [>]

  and social media, [>], [>]

  and social skills, [>]

  power and control

  and alliance building, [>]

  children's desire for, [>]

  education as source of, [>]

  expression of, boys vs. girls, [>]

  girl power vs. femininity, [>]

  and relational aggression, [>], [>]

  speaking truth to power, [>]–[>]

  using social media, [>]

  preschool, [>], [>]–[>]

  Price of Privilege, The (Levine), [>]–[>]

  privacy

  flaunting, and exclusion/isolation, [>]

  in high school, limits, [>]–[>]

  and social media, [>]–[>], [>], [>]

  profiles, on social media, [>]–[>]

  psychological aggression, [>]–[>]

  Puerto Rican girls, [>]–[>]

  "punking out," [>]

  Queen Bee Moms and Kingpin Dads (Wiseman), [>]–[>]

  questions to ask

  about aggression and bullying, [>], [>]–[>], [>], [>]–[>]

  about friendships, [>], [>]

  about psychological aggression, [>]

  about use of social media/technology, [>]–[>]

  Rachel (student), [>]

  racism and oppression, [>]–[>]

  Raneesha (student), [>]–[>]

  reality television, [>]

  real life vs. virtual life, [>], [>], [>], [>], [>], [>]. See also cyberbullying; social media

  Rebecca (coach, mother), [>]–[>]

  Rebecca (student), [>], [>], [>], [>], [>]

  Reena (student), [>], [>]

  Reese (student), [>]–[>], [>], [>]

  relational aggression

  behaviors associated with, [>], [>]–[>], [>]–[>], [>], [>]

  clique expulsion, [>]–[>]

  defined, [>]

  handling of, by educators, [>]–[>], [>]–[>]

  harm caused by, [>]

  identifying, [>]–[>]

  invisibility of, [>], [>]

  long-term effects, [>], [>]–[>]

  and popularity, [>]–[>]

  resisting, [>]

  using third-parties for, [>]

  See also girl bullying

  relationships

  among African American girls, [>]–[>]

  dynamics of, [>]–[>]

  false assumptions about, [>]

  female need for, [>]–[>], [>], [>]–[>]

  importance of, [>], [>], [>]–[>], [>]–[>], [>]

  insecurity about, [>]–[>]

  learning about, [>]–[>], [>], [>]–[>]

  and the paradox of authenticity, [>]–[>], [>]–[>]

  relational instability, [>]–[>], [>]–[>]

  role of conflict in, [>]–[>], [>]–[>]

  and social status, [>]–[>]

  truthfulness and, [>], [>]–[>], [>]–[>], [>]

  using social media/technology, [>]–[>], [>]–[>], [>], [>]–[>]

  See also anger; conflict; friends; popularity

  repression. See anger; emotions, feelings

  reputation, [>], [>], [>], [>], [>], [>], [>]

  research on bullying, [>], [>], [>]–[>], [>], [>], [>]

  resistance

  among working-class girls, girls of color, [>]

  to daughters who are bullies, [>]–[>]

  encouraging resilience, [>]

  fighting back, [>]–[>]

  and standing up for others, [>]–[>]

  using GIRL protocol, [>]–[>

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